Haven't heard from my boyfriend for 3 days now! What would you do?

[Slave4Hair]

(I'm so sorry it's so long!)
If i can even call him my bf anymore. Maybe i need to call him my ex? We got into a big fight saturday because i went out with a male friend of mine to the movies. I told my bf about it because i like to be honest, and he went OFF on me. According to him, i can no longer be trusted, i'm a liar, blah blah blah.

My (ex?) boyfriend is currently in school in GA, getting his masters. Thursday he asked that i buy a ticket to come see him, and he would reimburse me when i get there. So stupid me bought the ticket! Saturday he told me to never call him or text him again. I'm like , because i just bought a $259 airline ticket that he is supposed to give me money for. Sunday he called me, but i was sleep and didn't pick up. I called him back, but he didn't answererplexed. I have not spoken to him since Saturday and i'm freaking out bc i really need this money back. First of all, it's not mine...second of all, i'm a broke college student, i don't have money to throw away like that. I just am looking for advice on what to do! Should i keep calling him? I can't get a refund on the ticket, so should i go down there and give him a piece of my mind? Do i just let it go and forget about him? I'm losing patience with him. I can't believe after 3 years he would pull something like this! His bestfriend is a female, whom house he sleeps over! I mean, wtf?! Men can do whatever the hell they want and expect to keep women on a leash! Anyways ladies...what would you do?

 

[itismehmmkay]

Don't call him anymore
If he calls you, think about answering around the 2-3rd call.
And as for that airline ticket, just keep the credit: you can take a fun summer trip w/ some homegirls or that male friend later.

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

wow....he took the money from you only to break up? I hate to say this, as I really sympathize with you, but chalk it up as a loss and a learning experience. What goes around comes around. NO need in calling him anymore at this point, because right now, he's just being an a-hole, because he knows what he did. If you keep calling him, you'll look pressed. He is NOT going to give you your money back, no matter how many times you calll. Fuggedaboutit. I would fade to black and delete his number out of my phone.

Also, as a side note, I know you want to be honest, but some things are better left unsaid. It is hard enough already trying to maintain a relationship locally, let alone long distance wise. Do you think that a man will be honest and upfront and tell you certain things? They only tell you what they want you to know.

So sorry this happened to you.

Here's what you should have learned.

Not to be available alll the time...
The ball should always be in your court...
If he wants to see you, HE should pay for it.

 

[Slave4Hair]

wow....he took the money from you only to break up? I hate to say this, as I really sympathize with you, but chalk it up as a loss and a learning experience. What goes around comes around. NO need in calling him anymore at this point, because right now, he's just being an a-hole, because he knows what he did. If you keep calling him, you'll look pressed. He is NOT going to give you your money back, no matter how many times you calll. Fuggedaboutit. I would fade to black and delete his number out of my phone.

Also, as a side note, I know you want to be honest, but some things are better left unsaid. It is hard enough already trying to maintain a relationship locally, let alone long distance wise. Do you think that a man will be honest and upfront and tell you certain things? They only tell you what they want you to know.

So sorry this happened to you.

Here's what you should have learned.

Not to be available alll the time...
The ball should always be in your court...
If he wants to see you, HE should pay for it.

Girl! Never AGAIN! You'd think after three years someone wouldn't do you like that though...I don't plan on going there now even if he does call, i just want my money back I knew i should have purchased insurance!

 

[Taliah]

Take him to Judge Mathis.

 

[Allandra]

I hope he's ok. Please keep us posted.

 

[frankie]

Delete, erase, and/or block his number. Chalk the ticket up to a loss, and next time a man offers to pay for your ticket, have him give you the money first.

 

[Xavier]

wow....he took the money from you only to break up?

Technically he didn't take money from her. She chose to buy the ticket and under terms of repayment from him. That is a risk that the OP obviously was willing to take.

 

[Xavier]

I wonder what kinda of advice you would be getting if you claimed that your SO went out to the movies with a female friend?:scratchch

I don't know the dynamics your relationship but I would be steaming if my bf went to the movies with a female friend alone.*shrug*Maybe a breakup was warranted.

 

[Slave4Hair]

I wonder what kinda of advice you would be getting if you claimed that your SO went out to the movies with a female friend?:scratchch

I don't know the dynamics your relationship but I would be steaming if my bf went to the movies with a female friend alone.*shrug*Maybe a breakup was warranted.

But the thing is, he does! All the time! With girls he randomly meets. I have known this guy for about 7 years. It really was innocent, he knows this...he knows i have no feelings for this guy, so why he is acting stupid is beyond me. I trust him, so i have no prob with him having female friends...i guess it's not mutual.

 

[Xavier]

But the thing is, he does! All the time! With girls he randomly meets. I have known this guy for about 7 years. It really was innocent, he knows this...he knows i have no feelings for this guy, so why he is acting stupid is beyond me. I trust him, so i have no prob with him having female friends...i guess it's not mutual.

Well good riddance then, let him go and don't look back. I agree with the poster who said that you can try to get a credit from the airline for a future trip.

 

[Crystal]

Next time tell him about your date with your male friend AFTER he reimburses your money...

 

[january noir]

But the thing is, he does! All the time! With girls he randomly meets. I have known this guy for about 7 years. It really was innocent, he knows this...he knows i have no feelings for this guy, so why he is acting stupid is beyond me. I trust him, so i have no prob with him having female friends...i guess it's not mutual.

Girl, that's a smokescreen. He's seeing someone (maybe more than one woman) and that's his way of keeping you off balance. Men do this all the time. Trust and believe.

 

[Tylove101]

Delete, erase, and/or block his number. Chalk the ticket up to a loss, and next time a man offers to pay for your ticket, have him give you the money first.

I totally agree!!! Don't worry about it... don't call him... and take the lost of the money as a lesson learned.

 

[jada1111]

(I'm so sorry it's so long!)
If i can even call him my bf anymore. Maybe i need to call him my ex? We got into a big fight saturday because i went out with a male friend of mine to the movies. I told my bf about it because i like to be honest, and he went OFF on me. According to him, i can no longer be trusted, i'm a liar, blah blah blah.

My (ex?) boyfriend is currently in school in GA, getting his masters. Thursday he asked that i buy a ticket to come see him, and he would reimburse me when i get there. So stupid me bought the ticket! Saturday he told me to never call him or text him again. I'm like , because i just bought a $259 airline ticket that he is supposed to give me money for. Sunday he called me, but i was sleep and didn't pick up. I called him back, but he didn't answererplexed. I have not spoken to him since Saturday and i'm freaking out bc i really need this money back. First of all, it's not mine...second of all, i'm a broke college student, i don't have money to throw away like that. I just am looking for advice on what to do! Should i keep calling him? I can't get a refund on the ticket, so should i go down there and give him a piece of my mind? Do i just let it go and forget about him? I'm losing patience with him. I can't believe after 3 years he would pull something like this! His bestfriend is a female, whom house he sleeps over! I mean, wtf?! Men can do whatever the hell they want and expect to keep women on a leash! Anyways ladies...what would you do?

First off, you NEVER should have told him you went to the movies with another man. That was stupid. I don't know where all this "honesty" with your mate *ish came from, but there are some things people just don't need to know.

Second, he should have bought you the ticket in your name or sent you the money to buy it. I don't know if you can get it back it or not, but you live and you learn. Let this be a lesson to you for the future.

If this man doesn't pay you back this money or answer your calls, then you need to bite the money and NEVER, EVER speak to him again when he does call. Cause trust, he WILL call again, because he's a *itch man. Plain and simple. If you take him back after losing your money, then you're a fool.

 

[Slave4Hair]

First off, you NEVER should have told him you went to the movies with another man. That was stupid. I don't know where all this "honesty" with your mate *ish came from, but there are some things people just don't need to know.

Second, he should have bought you the ticket in your name or sent you the money to buy it. I don't know if you can get it back it or not, but you live and you learn. Let this be a lesson to you for the future.

If this man doesn't pay you back this money or answer your calls, then you need to bite the money and NEVER, EVER speak to him again when he does call. Cause trust, he WILL call again, because he's a *itch man. Plain and simple. If you take him back after losing your money, then you're a fool.

Thank you for your honesty. I agree with everything you said. I feel so stupid! Like you and all the ladies have said i have definitely learned my lesson, and not just about the ticket. Just wanted to say the bolded part had me crackin up, lol. And nope, i will not be talking to him again. Two things you don't mess with are my family, and my money...i'm done.

 

[LisaLisa1908]

I would not be worried about somebody that was not worried about me. Period. NOBODY who cares about you goes for that long without getting in touch with you.

 

[song_of_serenity]

Has everyone over looked the part where OP said:

His bestfriend is a female, whom house he sleeps over!

but he wants to get mad because you went to the movies? And he takes "random people he meets" to the movies?? WHAT??
...
Just add it to the book of life and close the chapter on this idiot. My ex fiance left owing money that was to go towards the wedding that fell through. I was steaming but you know what? He tried to hold that over me to keep contact ("I'll give you the money, but you can't expect me to not talk to you. How are you supposed to get it?")

The right one will come along.
~*Janelle~*

 

[january noir]

Has everyone over looked the part where OP said:

but he wants to get mad because you went to the movies? And he takes "random people he meets" to the movies?? WHAT??
...
Just add it to the book of life and close the chapter on this idiot. My ex fiance left owing money that was to go towards the wedding that fell through. I was steaming but you know what? He tried to hold that over me to keep contact ("I'll give you the money, but you can't expect me to not talk to you. How are you supposed to get it?")

The right one will come along.
~*Janelle~*

Nope. Didn't overlook it. He's a cad.

 

[kayte]

in regards to the ticket

..call the airlines and speak to customer service..if initially you get someone unpleasant...
hang up and try again
speak to someone..preferably a supervisor...keep insisting to speak to a higher up
explain there was a mistake about reimbursement or that you were cheated out it
and you are stuck with a ticket you have no use for and are in no position to spend money as a struggling college student
ask if you could please be given a refund due to extenuating circumstances

as an act of good will and public relations under personal duress of the customer
the airline sometimes will refund nonrefundable tickets

they did it for me once..it was a RT sales ticket to mexico
and I was packin zero pesos ....had no money at all
and had no bizness going anywhere let alone out of the country
I told them the truth..I got that money back and paid the billz

 

[Slave4Hair]

Has everyone over looked the part where OP said:

but he wants to get mad because you went to the movies? And he takes "random people he meets" to the movies?? WHAT??
...
Just add it to the book of life and close the chapter on this idiot. My ex fiance left owing money that was to go towards the wedding that fell through. I was steaming but you know what? He tried to hold that over me to keep contact ("I'll give you the money, but you can't expect me to not talk to you. How are you supposed to get it?")

The right one will come along.
~*Janelle~*

Wow, i'm sorry to hear that. I thought my situation was bad, but with a wedding involved?! Girl you are strong. This is just proof that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Dangling money over me sounds like something me ex would do too.

 

[Slave4Hair]

in regards to the ticket

..call the airlines and speak to customer service..if initially you get someone unpleasant...
hang up and try again
speak to someone..preferably a supervisor...keep insisting to speak to a higher up
explain there was a mistake about reimbursement or that you were cheated out it
and you are stuck with a ticket you have no use for and are in no position to spend money as a struggling college student
ask if you could please be given a refund due to extenuating circumstances

as an act of good will and public relations under personal duress of the customer
the airline sometimes will refund nonrefundable tickets

they did it for me once..it was a RT sales ticket to mexico
and I was packin zero pesos ....had no money at all
and had no bizness going anywhere let alone out of the country
I told them the truth..I got that money back and paid the billz

Thank you!!! I will definitely try this.

 

[SqrpioQutie]

(I'm so sorry it's so long!)
If i can even call him my bf anymore. Maybe i need to call him my ex? We got into a big fight saturday because i went out with a male friend of mine to the movies. I told my bf about it because i like to be honest, and he went OFF on me. According to him, i can no longer be trusted, i'm a liar, blah blah blah.

My (ex?) boyfriend is currently in school in GA, getting his masters. Thursday he asked that i buy a ticket to come see him, and he would reimburse me when i get there. So stupid me bought the ticket! Saturday he told me to never call him or text him again. I'm like , because i just bought a $259 airline ticket that he is supposed to give me money for. Sunday he called me, but i was sleep and didn't pick up. I called him back, but he didn't answererplexed. I have not spoken to him since Saturday and i'm freaking out bc i really need this money back. First of all, it's not mine...second of all, i'm a broke college student, i don't have money to throw away like that. I just am looking for advice on what to do! Should i keep calling him? I can't get a refund on the ticket, so should i go down there and give him a piece of my mind? Do i just let it go and forget about him? I'm losing patience with him. I can't believe after 3 years he would pull something like this! His bestfriend is a female, whom house he sleeps over! I mean, wtf?! Men can do whatever the hell they want and expect to keep women on a leash! Anyways ladies...what would you do?

personally, i wouldn't have bought the ticket... but since what's done is done, can you possibly transfer it to someone else (like post it on CL and then transfer it into someone else's name)?

if not, then you may be stuck...

would you have a place to stay if you went down there?... if so, you can always go and see about picking up a new bf...

but this dude??.. i'd stick a fork in him... 'tis done...

 

[discobiscuits]

Take him to Judge Mathis.

ditto

I hope he's ok. Please keep us posted.

ditto - call the hospitals or family then if he is ok.......(go to last comment.....

Technically he didn't take money from her. She chose to buy the ticket and under terms of repayment from him. That is a risk that the OP obviously was willing to take.

exactly. i would not have advised the OP to buy the ticket had she asked LHCF 1st... OP don't expect to see repayment.


OP: (In my best Whitley voice) Move on Martha, move on!

 

[Kawaii1]

He probably was cheating which is why he went off. People tend to think you would do things if that's what they would do, i.e he would begoing to the movies with his "other woman" so he thinks that's what you are doing. Get what I mean? How far out is the ticket? Can you sell it to someone else?

 

[*~*Afrolicious*~*]

First off, you NEVER should have told him you went to the movies with another man. That was stupid. I don't know where all this "honesty" with your mate *ish came from, but there are some things people just don't need to know.

I respectfully disagree with this statement. Two adults in a mature relationship should be open with one another. A mate should TRUST their SO to believe otherwise there's a weak foundation in the relationship. Its better the OP found this out sooner than later.

 

[TrendySocialite]

But the thing is, he does! All the time! With girls he randomly meets. I have known this guy for about 7 years. It really was innocent, he knows this...he knows i have no feelings for this guy, so why he is acting stupid is beyond me. I trust him, so i have no prob with him having female friends...i guess it's not mutual.

Sounds to me like he was looking for an excuse to end things...

 

[jada1111]

personally, i wouldn't have bought the ticket... but since what's done is done, can you possibly transfer it to someone else (like post it on CL and then transfer it into someone else's name)?

if not, then you may be stuck...

would you have a place to stay if you went down there?... if so, you can always go and see about picking up a new bf...

but this dude??.. i'd stick a fork in him... 'tis done...

That's a great idea!

 

[heyfranz]

He should be angry. A movie is a very intimate date and i would never speak to my BF again if he went to the movies with a female "friend". I hope your ex is okay, but he must be really hurt. I would be in his shoes.


ETA: Okay, i just read further and if he does it all the time with random females, how were you two a "couple"...

 

[jada1111]

I respectfully disagree with this statement. Two adults in a mature relationship should be open with one another. A mate should TRUST their SO to believe otherwise there's a weak foundation in the relationship. Its better the OP found this out sooner than later.

We will have to RESPECTFULLY disagree then.