Hair Shocker. Help a sistah out! :(

[SleekandBouncy]

I go to a high end blk salon for touchups and a Dominican salon for wash & sets. I just came back from a new Dominican salon and this is what she had to say: "mammi, you're hair is too (she made the gesture for spongey & soft), whatever relaxer your stylist uses is too strong for you, come to me and we have lots of blk clients and they all have beautiful hair". I assumed a DR salon would overprocess my hair and apply it past the new growt, but now I don't know.

Is she right? Is my high end, super detailed, very thorough stylist jacking up my hair? She's an awesome stylist but she doesn't talk to me about the condition of my hair, she nevers says "your hair feels dry/soft/weak/etc. use this..." Oh and she charges a lot of $$$$

Over the past 5 years I always thought my hair was in the best hands because my stylist is obsessive about hair health. During that time my hair stood up to highlights plus a semi permanent to cover them. I only have 1" of highlighted hair left, but years after my hair is still quick to tangle when wet, glossing treatments like Sebastian's colorshines never show up, my hair rarely responds to the popular conditioners mentioned on the board, it's like my hair was a black hole and just sucked it all in. I had assumed it was due to the highlights, lack of moisture, bad diet or that I was just born with tangly hair.

Does my hair simply lack protein or moisture? or has my homegirl been overprocessing my hair all this time? Everything I thought about my hair and salon has been turned upside down, I'm confused, disorientated and scurrred

 

[KiniKakes]

Its funny, because ive found that just because a salon is predominantly black, and considered "upscale"..... doesnt necessarily mean that they are any "better" in terms of hair care. Some of those same salons will have you fried, dyed, and laid to the side.... with no regard for the health or condition of the hair.

Ive been going to a Dominican salon for 6 years now, since Ive lived in NY. I used to go to black salons when I lived in MD..... and I'll occasionally go to a nice black salon (Follicles in Brooklyn) when I want a special style.

But in general, I find that my hair is treated SO much better, and just thrives overall, under the Dominican ladies. The products that they use are usually natural-based (ie, olive oil, carrot, avocado, garlic, etc.), they are VERY gentle with my hair (only combing it when saturated with conditioner), base you thoroughly and touch-up ONLY the new growth, and in general my hair is the healthiest its ever been under them. I dont get the full-blow outs, but I do get my roots blown out after a roller set, so heat is minimal..... And they do NOT over-trim or get a nasty attitude when you tell them that you don't want a trim this today.

So yeah, I guess my point is that........ I am happier with my Dominican salon than I have ever been with other salons. They definitely know African-American hair, I have no doubts about that.

 

[shunta]

Hmm...very interesting. Well what relaxer does your stylist use? I know from reading Sista's threads on protein and moisture that it may be that your hair needs a little protein. A little protein now and then wont hurt. It doesnt even have to be a hardcore protein. Personally, I m afraid to do the hardcore proteins; I always use a light protein conditioner every now and then. Maybe you should let the Dominicans relax your hair once. Have you seen any of their black client's hair that they have relaxed? And if you dont like it, you can always go back to your old stylist. I would give them a try.

 

[aminata]

Sleekandbouncy, maybe your Dominican stylist is just trying to sell you her services. Have you seen her or other stylist relax hair? If you have what is their technique?

How does your hair feel to you? Do you think it needs extra conditioning/moisturizing/etc.? Do you have shedding or breakage? How would you describe your hair? If you can answer these questions--then it might take you closer to the answer that you are looking for.

You could ask your regular stylist to re-examine the health of your hair. Also with your regular stylist have you reached your hair goals?

 

[SleekandBouncy]

How can I tell the difference between overprocessed and hair in need of protein? I had a Nexxus protein treatment last week and 4 weeks before that I used Elucence protein treatment.

Aminata, this would describe my hair:

* Fairly strong, but no elasticity/stretch.
* Dry sometimes, absorbs a lot of water and becomes very heavy when wet.
* EXTREMELY quick to tangle when wet, my ends tangle slightly even when dry.
* I have too much breakage, I loose a depressing amount of hair w/ every wash due to tangles and breakage. Thankfully my hair grows really fast and is very thick so no one can really tell.
* Heat activated gloss treatments like Sebastian, Clairol, etc. don't show up on my hair, it's like my hair absorbs everything.

With my touch/up stylist my hair grew past bra strap length but that was inspite of the breakage and tangles, that's just how my hair grows. If I ask her to recommend a deep conditioner she's usually vague "everyone's hair is so different". I'm also a little concerned that she never comments on the condition of my hair nor the tangles other than to say "well some ppls hair tangles very easily". I asked her if my hair was porous and she said it's hard to tell, however she does base my whole scalp, only applies the relaxer to the new growth and washes it out 4x.

ETA: For the past 5yrs she's used Affirm no lye, but recently switched to Precise because I told her my hair felt damaged. She won't use Mizani because she says it leaves her clients hair feeling "funny"

 

[yourleoqueen]

From your description above it sounds as if your hair is over-processed. Does it dry quickly? I ask because hair that dries quickly isn't holding moisture also a classic sign of over-processing.

Either way, if your stylist is vague in answering your questions and not open to talking to you about your concerns with your hair, she sounds, uhm ...questionable. I say hang out at the Dominican Salon and talk with some of the relaxed ladies you see there or ask the lady to have some of the clients she relaxes call you and talk with them about the way she cares for and relaxes their hair. Good luck!

 

[destiny616]

How can I tell the difference between overprocessed and hair in need of protein? I had a Nexxus protein treatment last week and 4 weeks before that I used Elucence protein treatment.

Aminata, this would describe my hair:

* Fairly strong, but no elasticity/stretch.
* Dry sometimes, absorbs a lot of water and becomes very heavy when wet.
* EXTREMELY quick to tangle when wet, my ends tangle slightly even when dry.
* I have too much breakage, I loose a depressing amount of hair w/ every wash due to tangles and breakage. Thankfully my hair grows really fast and is very thick so no one can really tell.
* Heat activated gloss treatments like Sebastian, Clairol, etc. don't show up on my hair, it's like my hair absorbs everything.

With my touch/up stylist my hair grew past bra strap length but that was inspite of the breakage and tangles, that's just how my hair grows. If I ask her to recommend a deep conditioner she's usually vague "everyone's hair is so different". I'm also a little concerned that she never comments on the condition of my hair nor the tangles other than to say "well some ppls hair tangles very easily". I asked her if my hair was porous and she said it's hard to tell, however she does base my whole scalp, only applies the relaxer to the new growth and washes it out 4x.

ETA: For the past 5yrs she's used Affirm no lye, but recently switched to Precise because I told her my hair felt damaged. She won't use Mizani because she says it leaves her clients hair feeling "funny"

This is bothering me, she has been doing your hair for at least five years and she doesn't know your hair well enough to make a conditioner recommendation and she's a licensed stylist(i'm assuming) and she can't tell you if your hair is porous or not

WOW

 

[aminata]

Sleekandbouncy-

I agree with the other posters--you might want to check out what technique and relaxer your Dominican hairstylist uses, and how her relaxed clients look.
Sounds like you need to take a break from your expensive stylist for awhile.

 

[MissFallon]

I like the fact that a lot of dominican salons don't harass you about getting a relaxer. I went in 20 weeks post b4 and asked for a wash and set and she had no problem with it. I know if I would have went to the black salon the first thing I would have heard was that I need a relaxer. I haven't been to a black salon since the lady told me I need to relaxer more often than twice a year because relaxing twice a year is the reason my hair is thin and I should relax every 6 weeks instead to keep my hair healthy, which we all know isn't true.

 

[SleekandBouncy]

This is bothering me, she has been doing your hair for at least five years and she doesn't know your hair well enough to make a conditioner recommendation and she's a licensed stylist(i'm assuming) and she can't tell you if your hair is porous or not

WOW

She's just very laid back, everything "depends" or "varies", but excellent in other areas. As tangly as my hair is I'm surprised she didn't jump on the opportunity to suggest a special deep treatment even if to charge me for it.
My next relaxer t/u is in two weeks, so I have about 5 days to decide. She does everything right in terms of being gentle, basing my scalp, etc., maybe I just need to ask her to go down to mild or change from Affirm/Precise, though it's odd she hasn't addressed the tangles and breakage beforehand.

Thanks everyone for the feedback. Now I just have to figure out how to tell protein defficient hair from overprocessed hair.