Guess who's about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

[alibi]

Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Yep ladies, it's true. I've been on the fence for about 3 weeks now. Ever since my failed Curve Salon visit, I've been contemplating going back to relaxing. Maybe my appointment cancellation was a sign, I dunno. I'm beginning to feel like I'm not seeing any of the progress of my transition b/c my hair is always in this /images/graemlins/censored.gif bun! I don't feel sexy or pretty anymore. And I'm EXTREMELY afraid that my hair is gonna look like a jheri curl once I'm donw w/ my transition. /images/graemlins/look.gif I don't know...I keep seeing all these relaxed ladies on the street with beautiful flowing hair, and I'm starting to miss it! Here in Miami, I can't wear my hair straight due to the humidity. And what's worse, I'm starting to get a small section of breakage at the back of my head where I put my bun. /images/graemlins/cry3.gif I'm feeling very down about my transition right now, and I've given myself until the end of the week to make a decision. I currently have about 6 inches of natural hair, but it seems like it's stopped growing. Well anyways, I didn't want anything, I just wanted to vent...

 

[JenniferMD]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

I'm glad you won't be making a decision until later this week b/c it seems as though you're emotional right now and might not make the right decision. I know you'll do the right thing though--and we're here for support /images/graemlins/kiss.gif

 

[NGC]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

It'll be okay. Do what you need to do to be happy with your hair. Period, the end. /images/graemlins/kisses.gif /images/graemlins/kissing4.gif

This weather ain't helpin' though, huh /images/graemlins/laugh.gif

 

[love2praz]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

[ QUOTE ]
I'm glad you won't be making a decision until later this week b/c it seems as though you're emotional right now and might not make the right decision. I know you'll do the right thing though--and we're here for support /images/graemlins/kiss.gif

[/ QUOTE ]Jennifer couldn't have said it better. We at LHCF have your back whatever you decide! /images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[Carlie]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

When all is said and done, the only thing that will have mattered is that you've done whatever's best for YOU! Whatever you decide, take comfort in knowing that LHCF is here for you!

 

[aqualung]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Wear it rollerset straight for a couple of weeks to take a break from the bun. You shouldn't decide under stress.

 

[Innocent_Kiss]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Wearing your hair in the same style can cause breakage, why don't you change up with braid outs, twist outs, etc? Try looking at transitioners or natural heads photo albums for ideas and inspiration. In agreement with everyone else, do what's best for you!

P.S. I would really recommend taking tension off of the spot where you see breakage. If a bun is the only style you feel comfortable with, try switching the bun to a different location (up or down). Add some cornrows or hair accessories to jazz it up. Hope it works out /images/graemlins/smile.gif A good scalp message daily/nightly should help it grow back in, too.

 

[model_chick717]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

[ QUOTE ]
Wear it rollerset straight for a couple of weeks to take a break from the bun. You shouldn't decide under stress.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is very good advice, ayanapooh--sometimes all you need is a simple change. Try wearing it rollerset for a few days. I'm sure even with all the new growth, it would look so big and fluffy.... But I feel you on the "long flowing hair..." stuff--even I get tired of my bush and want silky-straight hair.... /images/graemlins/perplexed.gif

 

[SherryLove]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

ayanap--do not fret.....and as all the other ladies have already said, we are here to support you in whatever decision you make......okay......i know it ain't easy because i went through all of emotional turmoil before i finally gave in and relaxed my hair again. /images/graemlins/kiss.gif

 

[Faith]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

You too....lol...must be something in the air..lol

 

[Erica78]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

I feel you on wanting to throw in the towel at times! Transitioning can be frustrating. Just had a bad expirence this weekend with detangling. I agree with what the others said about waiting a little while before making a final decision. I checked out your album a week or so ago...and however you choose to wear your hair...it will be beautiful. /images/graemlins/smile.gif Hang in there!

 

[Tracy]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Decide next week, Ayana.


You should make sure. /images/graemlins/smile.gif If you relax it's still going to be humid in Miami and you still can't beat humidity eeven when you're relaxed.

Try wearing a wash and go for a few days and leave the bun on the shelf for a while? Maybe?

Either way, good luck and we're with you. /images/graemlins/up.gif

 

[brittanynic16]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

What the h*ll is in the air around here?

 

[LEOLADYSW]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Do whatever makes you happy with your hair. You are the one who has to live with it, so the decision is yours. As has been said before, whatever you want, we will support.

 

[inthepink]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Definitely take some time to decide what you want to do. Don't make an emotional decision! I certainly understand what you mean about being sick of the buns and not feeling pretty anymore (I have another year of that, I think). I do want to say to think a lot about what caused you to transition in the first place. You've done this for over a year so I would hate for you to regret your decision either way. However, I do support whatever decision you make. But I say to give yourself another whole week. Write down the pros and cons. Write down how you plan to wear your hair once it's natural and it will not look like a gheri curl!! Just get your thoughts down on paper before making a decision.

I'm with model_chick, too. I sometimes miss my silky straight hair but I know I can get that temporarily by flat ironing. Have you tried braidouts or twistouts so you can wear your hair down occasionally?

Good luck!

 

[kitchen_tician]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Awww AP /images/graemlins/kiss.gif
I don't have any real advice, but I agree to take a rest from your bun and think it out thoroughly before making a decision. Keep the faith and stay positive.

 

[melodee]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

We're all here for you, ayana, no matter what you choose to do!

 

[KinksnCurlz]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

[ QUOTE ]
When all is said and done, the only thing that will have mattered is that you've done whatever's best for YOU! Whatever you decide, take comfort in knowing that LHCF is here for you!

[/ QUOTE ]

exactly /images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[Tonya]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

I totally understand how you are feeling....I am not relaxed i am texturized and though my hair is thick as ever I look at my cousin's long silky straight hair and often get tempted...lucky for me my hair is resistant so the only way I am going silky straight is with a flat iron adn I can hang that up until winter rolls around.

 

[Lindy]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Ayanna,
I have to admit that I'm surprised to hear that you're thinking about relaxing again, only because it has seemed like you've done so well with your transitioning!!

Make sure you think real hard about it before going through with the relaxer... It just seems like you've come so far to turn back now... /images/graemlins/look.gif

But whatever you decide, of course you know that you have the full support of all of us here at LHCF!!! /images/graemlins/weird.gif

/images/graemlins/kiss.gif

 

[Tai]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

I'm convinced that something is in the fall air. Lately, I've been tempted (VERY) to texturize again because I'm sick of my buns, phonypony, and my wash n go. I tried rollersetting and my roots won't get straight w/o direct heat. /images/graemlins/frown.gif I feel where you're at, Ayanapooh. /images/graemlins/kiss.gif

Try not to make a decision right now. Weigh the benefits of relaxing/texturizing and continuing your transition. I feel safe in guaranteeing you that your hair will not look like a jheri curl when you're done. /images/graemlins/smile.gif Your waves and curls look gorgeous and I'm pretty sure you'll look like Hairlove and Kha.

No matter what you decide, you know all of us here are supporting you. Do what's best for you.

 

[Country gal]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

I feel you Aya. However I think you should wait another week or two to see if that is trully your desire. I feel like that too because I often don't have the time to do my hair. I often wear it in a puffy bun. So I am on the fence too. I think whenever I get some money, I will sport braids or a sewn in weave before making a decision. I wanted to go with out a perm for at least a year. My last perm was Jan. 30th.

 

[Ayeshia]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Hang in there Ayana you can do it! /images/graemlins/weird.gif

Its been almost a year dont turn back now. Its been almost a year for me since my big chop, and the longer I go without a relaxer, the less I desire to have one. I get so many comliments on my hair and I stand out like a sore thumb (in a good way) Well whatever you do good luck and give it some thought. We're here to support!

 

[Poohbear]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

I'm transitioning too and I'm tempted myself to relax. Especially since I'm going into the field of accounting. I am almost 11 weeks so far without a relaxer. I was doing the buns and braidouts and got tired of them and did a rollerset. My rollerset is big and puffy from the new growth, but I like it since it makes my fine hair look fuller and thicker. Plus I haven't used direct heat in almost a month! Even when you go completely natural, there are ways to achieve long silky hair if your hair is long enough. You could flat iron or press it. That's what I plan to do when i go natural and want straight hair sometimes. I won't do it all the time because I'm also trying to avoid using a lot of heat. But if you are more comfortable with having straight hair all the time and you want to avoid heat, then relaxing may be an option for you if you're worried about how your natural hair will look...and PLUS, I just looked at your album and I like your hair texture! You will have beautiful natural hair. Check out saddity1's album.

 

[Ayeshia]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

[ QUOTE ]
I'm transitioning too and I'm tempted myself to relax. Especially since I'm going into the field of accounting. I am almost 11 weeks so far without a relaxer. I was doing the buns and braidouts and got tired of them and did a rollerset. My rollerset is big and puffy from the new growth, but I like it since it makes my fine hair look fuller and thicker. Plus I haven't used direct heat in almost a month! Even when you go completely natural, there are ways to achieve long silky hair if your hair is long enough. You could flat iron or press it. That's what I plan to do when i go natural and want straight hair sometimes. I won't do it all the time because I'm also trying to avoid using a lot of heat. But if you are more comfortable with having straight hair all the time and you want to avoid heat, then relaxing may be an option for you if you're worried about how your natural hair will look.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is exactly why I stopped relaxing. I never wore my hair straight just in braidouts 99% of the time. The only time it was str8 was when I got a touch up. Waste of money for me.

 

[BeautyOfTruth]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Hi Ayana /images/graemlins/wave.gif

You know I'll support whatever you decide. And I love the support from the ladies here.

And you are pretty always, no matter how you wear your hair. /images/graemlins/kiss.gif

 

[EbonyEyes]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

[ QUOTE ]
I'm transitioning too and I'm tempted myself to relax. Especially since I'm going into the field of accounting. I am almost 11 weeks so far without a relaxer. I was doing the buns and braidouts and got tired of them and did a rollerset. My rollerset is big and puffy from the new growth, but I like it since it makes my fine hair look fuller and thicker. Plus I haven't used direct heat in almost a month! Even when you go completely natural, there are ways to achieve long silky hair if your hair is long enough. You could flat iron or press it. That's what I plan to do when i go natural and want straight hair sometimes. I won't do it all the time because I'm also trying to avoid using a lot of heat. But if you are more comfortable with having straight hair all the time and you want to avoid heat, then relaxing may be an option for you if you're worried about how your natural hair will look...and PLUS, I just looked at your album and I like your hair texture! You will have beautiful natural hair. Check out saddity1's album.

[/ QUOTE ]

Hi Poohbear,

I'm an accounting major myself and from time to time I worry about if my hair will be accepted by employers. I'm also considering working for one of the Big 4 and my guess is that relaxed hair is preferred.

Although there are ways to get natural hair straight, I don't want to use them in fear that my hair will get damaged. I've heard too many horror stories.

If I want to show more length, I wear a twistout.

-Ebony

 

[naughteegirl]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

hmk..I work for a big four and like some other ladies have said; if you have the goodies (technical and ppl skills) they dont care so much abt ur hair as long as its neat. I am natural and though Ive had braids since I started I interviewed with a blown out afro ( I pressed it and it reverted so it was pouffy) and Ive seen a few (admittedly very few) natural sisters...but honestly having talked to some of these guys Im so sure they dont even notice and at my firm its definitely white male dominated

 

[dreemssold]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

Ayana, I am sure you will decide what is best for your hair, but I must agree that another style might help you break out of the rut. 6" of natural hair is so much progress...it's definitely worth more consideration. Good luck either way...you have beautiful hair, so no worries, either way it will be pretty!

 

[jd_bdfly]

Re: Guess who\'s about to join Sherrylove and Ms. Kenesha...

[ QUOTE ]

Its been almost a year for me since my big chop, and the longer I go without a relaxer, the less I desire to have one.

[/ QUOTE ]
ITA, Ayeshia. It's so funny how frustrated transitioners can have different reactions. For me, instead of making me want to relax, transitioning difficulties push me more toward the other extreme of cutting off my relaxed ends, of which I still have a significant amount. I think if I get to a point where I am totally frustrated, I will cut it all off and put some braids in for a bit.

In any case, good luck Ayana, and don't make any rash decisions.