Good Friend, Bad Hair

[Guest]

I have a friend who is as sweet as can be, but her hair is looking f'd up! It's really on the half. Breakage, 50 thousand different lengths, dried out, and doesn't move!!! I am trying to talk her into getting a CUT/STYLE, so far I've only been able to talk her into a TRIM.... she makes me wanna HOLLAH!!!! I told her that she needs a cut to make it look right, eventhough I know she wants to hold onto the longer portions (her hair is like chin/neck length in the back with shorter peices all thru it, like as short as 2 inches in some places). How can I say it effectively without being rude that a trim just isn't going to cut it? /images/graemlins/look.gif

 

[ms_kenesha]

Tell her, "Girl I know you want to keep some of that length, but your hair will look much healthier and fuller if you just cut all the damaged parts off." If she still doesn't want to listen. Let her be dumb! /images/graemlins/nuts.gif

 

[Guest]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
If she still doesn't want to listen. Let her be dumb!

[/ QUOTE ] LOL /images/graemlins/grin.gif
That's so funny you said that. You sound like me and my friends talking. I did say that to her, I also told her that I would try to help her by finding some different styles that she may want to consider. I'm so tired of looking at it. BTW, she's addicted to curling irons and I think that's why she has so much breakage. /images/graemlins/mad.gif

 

[L.A. Woman]

Maybe you can try mentioning something about this board - get her curious enough to read up and maybe she'll be inspired into taking good care of her hair.

Or talk about the benefits you found in this product or that method of caring for your hair in a casual way. She'll think "hmm it worked for her obviously, so maybe I should try it too". I had a friend with a similar skin type, but had really dark blemishes that coverd her entire face along with smaller whiteheads. I mentioned I intended to go on a 7-day pH balancing diet to chill out my blood - because problem skin is systemic. If your insides are clean your skin follows. But I didn't say "you should do it too". I just did it and by my 3rd day she was like "I think I'll try it". She wasn't able to stick to it (she fell off the wagon the 2nd day) but she ate cleaner for a while and her skin did improve.

 

[Allandra]

Hmmmmm.....The only thing I can think of C is to have a girls day out (hair, manicure, pedicure, shopping and lunch). If it's the same lady you've spoke about before, she should take one look at YOUR hair and be ready and willing to follow your advice. Hmph. I know I would if I were her. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[LondonDiva]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
L.A. Woman said:
Maybe you can try mentioning something about this board - get her curious enough to read up and maybe she'll be inspired into taking good care of her hair.


[/ QUOTE ]

Caramela if you do that remember to edit the part where you said her hair was f'd up. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[Guest]

Good point, LD. I think I'll hold off on telling her about the board. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[LondonDiva]

Don't forget the confessions thread too. /images/graemlins/laugh.gif I was going to invite someone over here, but I haven't got that good a memory to sift through over 1000 posts if I said something ill about someone I know.

 

[Fashionista]

I think if she is really a good friend she should trust your constructive criticism and advice. If she doesn't want to hear it from you recommend the site maybe out of this group of over 500 women she will find someone who had similar problems and made a turn for the better to inspire her.

 

[pebbles]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
she should take one look at YOUR hair and be ready and willing to follow your advice. Hmph. I know I would if I were her.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm with you Allandra. If it were me, I would have taken Caramela's advice as well. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[sweetcocoa]

I also agree that your hair should be all then inspiration she needed. Some folks are uncomfortable when it comes to admitting someone else is right...especially if they were giving you a hard time when YOU first started taking care of your hair(you know...teasing you about buying too many hair products...for me some of my friends told me I shouldn't shampoo or rinse so much cause it will dry my hair out...now they see differently... /images/graemlins/grin.gif the same friend trimmed my hair a little for me yesterday and commented on how long my hair got from last year)...Anyways, so now it's kind of hard to admit to you that you were right. Give her sometime or offer to work with her hair a little one day...putting it in different styles...then as you are doing this say things like...Girl all you need is a little cut here and there and this style would be the bomb on you....You know the old saying....flattery will get you everywhere.... /images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[LondonDiva]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
I also agree that your hair should be all then inspiration she needed

[/ QUOTE ]

I was actually going to ask this?

Caramela, isn't she in awe of your hair health/length? Or is she one of those types of people that asks for advice and doesn't act upon it?

 

[AmilLion]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
Caramela said:
I have a friend who is as sweet as can be, but her hair is looking f'd up! It's really on the half. Breakage, 50 thousand different lengths, dried out, and doesn't move!!! I am trying to talk her into getting a CUT/STYLE, so far I've only been able to talk her into a TRIM.... she makes me wanna HOLLAH!!!! I told her that she needs a cut to make it look right, eventhough I know she wants to hold onto the longer portions (her hair is like chin/neck length in the back with shorter peices all thru it, like as short as 2 inches in some places). How can I say it effectively without being rude that a trim just isn't going to cut it? /images/graemlins/look.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

One day, while lodging around, I would pull out a hair magazine and start pointing to short hair styles and tell her how complimenting a short style could be for her. Make her think she'll be the "BOMB" with a new hair cut. If she believes that, she may honestly take the cut. While suggesting her new "Cut", you could throw in how healthy and shiny her hair will look /images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[hairfanatic]

Caramela,

Girl, it sounds like you need to send that poor woman to this forum to get hooked up! /images/graemlins/smile.gif Maybe if she was able to see the benefits of cutting, she will be more inclined to do something. I know before this forum people used to tell me to do certain things with my hair and I wouldn't. It wasn't that I didn't want to listen but I was like "you don't know what I'm trying to achieve or the experiences I have had with someone cutting my hair". Maybe you can show her some of your pictures when your hair was short and how it grew to the length is it now....It would definately make a believer out of her then that a haircut just might be good for her. /images/graemlins/smile.gif