From Setback to Comeback - An Encouragement Thread

Aww you guys are gonna make me cry:cry:
I had a couple of setbacks when I moved to Ga, when I was in Fl I went to the same stylist for 5 yrs, my hair grew below the brastrap and it was so healthy and that was with me washing my hair once every other week, relaxers every 4-5 weeks. But when I moved I found a scissor happy stylist, she did a big chop the first visit and then she wanted to trim every visit but her trims were cuts, so the last relaxer I believe she left the relaxer on my nape too long or didnt properly wash it out and it broke to my NG, my edges began to break and thin which I believe came from wrapping, so I changed stylist and now get relaxers every 6 weeks and am working on a regime. Sorry dont have any good pics to attach.

May I suggest stretching your relaxers a little longer...like 8 weeks? The main reason people stretch is to avoid overlapping which leads to overprocessed and weaker hair that many times breaks off.
 
May I suggest stretching your relaxers a little longer...like 8 weeks? The main reason people stretch is to avoid overlapping which leads to overprocessed and weaker hair that many times breaks off.
The longest I could do was 7 weeks, it seems the longer I go the more shedding I experience but I will try it again this time, right now Im at 5 weeks post and was planning to go next week I guess I should try to hold off a litter longer.

Here are some current photos, this breakage happened in Dec 08 and my edges are struggling to grow, always has and my nape is getting better. I want my length back I had in my avatar photo :-(
 

Attachments

  • 040.jpg
    040.jpg
    82.9 KB · Views: 77
  • 041.jpg
    041.jpg
    87.2 KB · Views: 71
  • 043.jpg
    043.jpg
    80.4 KB · Views: 85
  • 042.jpg
    042.jpg
    87.9 KB · Views: 81
Last edited:
The longest I could do was 7 weeks, it seems the longer I go the more shedding I experience but I will try it again this time, right now Im at 5 weeks post and was planning to go next week I guess I should try to hold off a litter longer.

Here are some current photos, this breakage happened in Dec 08 and my edges are struggling to grow, always has and my nape is getting better. I want my length back I had in my avatar photo :-(

If the only thing that's happening is more shedding, then there's no reason not to stretch.

Shedding is not a bad thing. It's a normal part of the hair growth cycle (it's the third phase) and it's going to happen regardless of how often you relax. Humans shed anywhere from 25-150 hairs per day so as long as you aren't seeing bald spots, you're fine.

Also, the problems you're having with your edges may be exacerbated by constant relaxing. The edges tend to have the weakest hair and are the most abused in general. Relaxing in such short intervals is too much for a lot of people's edges.

I'm just saying this because the people I've seen with the healthiest heads of relaxed hair over a long period of time usually stretch more than 2 months. Their hair seems to be the healthiest and retaining length isn't too big of a problem for them. Of course, since the longest you've stretched is 7 weeks, maybe you should start there. Do a 7 week stretch, then 8 week, and so on. There are lots of experienced stretchers here to help you and if it doesn't work out, you can always go back to 6 weeks.
 
If the only thing that's happening is more shedding, then there's no reason not to stretch.

Shedding is not a bad thing. It's a normal part of the hair growth cycle (it's the third phase) and it's going to happen regardless of how often you relax. Humans shed anywhere from 25-150 hairs per day so as long as you aren't seeing bald spots, you're fine.

Also, the problems you're having with your edges may be exacerbated by constant relaxing. The edges tend to have the weakest hair and are the most abused in general. Relaxing in such short intervals is too much for a lot of people's edges.

I'm just saying this because the people I've seen with the healthiest heads of relaxed hair over a long period of time usually stretch more than 2 months. Their hair seems to be the healthiest and retaining length isn't too big of a problem for them. Of course, since the longest you've stretched is 7 weeks, maybe you should start there. Do a 7 week stretch, then 8 week, and so on. There are lots of experienced stretchers here to help you and if it doesn't work out, you can always go back to 6 weeks.
You know now that I think about how short my edges are and how they dont grow as fast as the rest of my hair they got to be getting overprocessed because they have a sort fried look to them. Ok Im gonna do it! Im stretching till my birthday 9/11 that will be 2 mons from my last relaxer. Ooh this is gonna be tough, but I think its the only way im gonna see some benefits to my edges. Thank you so much MSA!!:hug3:
 
You know now that I think about how short my edges are and how they dont grow as fast as the rest of my hair they got to be getting overprocessed because they have a sort fried look to them. Ok Im gonna do it! Im stretching till my birthday 9/11 that will be 2 mons from my last relaxer. Ooh this is gonna be tough, but I think its the only way im gonna see some benefits to my edges. Thank you so much MSA!!:hug3:


Yay I'm glad I convinced you! Just remember to keep your new growth moisturized and detangled. Also, keep the line of demarcation strong (but supple) so that you can avoid breakage. Many people find that using a light protein in their regimen along with applying their conditioner in small sections like a relaxer really helps them.

Here's the link the relaxer stretcher's support thread to get you started:
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=118195
 
Yay I'm glad I convinced you! Just remember to keep your new growth moisturized and detangled. Also, keep the line of demarcation strong (but supple) so that you can avoid breakage. Many people find that using a light protein in their regimen along with applying their conditioner in small sections like a relaxer really helps them.

Here's the link the relaxer stretcher's support thread to get you started:
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=118195
Thank You Boo!!:spinning:
 
I have a setback everytime I clarify/chelate and once when I used porosity control by roux.

I was able to clarify when my hair was texlaxed but as soon as new growth started coming in, it was a wrap. I dont even know what to do now because im natural now. ACV rinses? Baking soda?

I know many people have had success with baking soda as a clarifier, do a search on it. Can you describe what happens to your hair when you clarify/chelate?
 
DesiRae that story was so sad especially when you were describing your frustration as a natural and the sadness you felt because you knew you were going to relax :sad:, your hair is going to make tremendous strides from now on.

BostonMaria thanks so much for sharing, your hair is beautiful!! :drunk:

locabouthair I'm sorry you experienced this at the hands of careless stylists, I believe your hair is going to make a full recovery very soon :yep: just keep loving it back to health

Thanks to belle_reveuse28 and angiet1985 for their loving posts and msa for her help to sheedahp

Anymore stories of inspiration?
 
Aww don't be sad, I was just sad at the time because I wanted to make 2 years natural and I felt like a quitter...But it's okay now. My hair is doing good, not great.

I just know it can be better if I keep it simple and stick to a simple regimen, also I need to work on stretching longer, it just seems harder to stretch with short fine hair.

Here's a recent pic:
039-vi.jpg
 
I've been taking it really slow.

May or June 2007
100_2984.jpg


August 07- see thru
100_3243-th.jpg


I cut in September 07, progress in 12/07
sept-Dec.jpg


12/2008
100_0645.jpg


may 09
010-Copy.jpg


I am really keeping an eye on my hair. It's been a lot of trimming but it's been worth it.

ETA: My setback came from constantly combing my hair and not trimming regularly. I also was not DCing as often I should have. My hair was dry and brittle and the breakage started in the nape. I cut in September 07 to SL and I have been trimming and Dc'ing consistently since.
 
Last edited:
Well my set back came along after I didn't pay too much attention to the post on this site in the very beginning. I put a dry curl in my hair after being all natrual for 6 yrs wrong move. I thought if I pulled my curls out it was grow faster, knowing my hair for yrs it don't like chemicals. Now once I got it in there I started getting on the forum more and more and wanted to try this and that which should have been when I was all natural. Now on my chemical weak hair I decided to try mega tek and then the dry shampoo, now by the time I decided all this I was starting to have the breakage with the chemical and I was not having any probrlem with the mega tek and the carmel I was doing and I was showing signs of lenght. what went wrong is when I added that dry abrasive powder to my weak hair and that is when I got bald. So I decided to cry later and do my bc in dec 08.
Second picture is what it is looking like 8 months after bc and the last one is me being able to put plaits in there now and started with the mega tek again but this time just not every night and only on the scalp. So I am getting growth but not sure how many inches I have at this time. As long as my arms will allow me with out pain I will plait it up at night and co wash in the morning.
Attached Thumbnails

Looks Like I was posting in the wrong thread. THis one 12/16 bc day005.JPG

002.jpg now7 months after, doing my co washing everyday. working out find

003.JPG 8 months after bc plaiting and mega tek on the scalp so far so good
 
Last edited:
This is great! I wanna hear from more naturals though... Anymore 'victory over setback' stories?
 
Junonia, your hair is amazing! I think I may be going through a set-back right now because of overprocessing. I'm waiting to see how long it'll take me to make a come-back.
 
I've been taking it really slow.

May or June 2007
100_2984.jpg


August 07- see thru
100_3243-th.jpg


I cut in September 07, progress in 12/07
sept-Dec.jpg


12/2008
100_0645.jpg


may 09
010-Copy.jpg


I am really keeping an eye on my hair. It's been a lot of trimming but it's been worth it.

ETA: My setback came from constantly combing my hair and not trimming regularly. I also was not DCing as often I should have. My hair was dry and brittle and the breakage started in the nape. I cut in September 07 to SL and I have been trimming and Dc'ing consistently since.

Your hair look really great and healthy now.
 
Three and a half years ago I decided to cut my hair down to about 1 1/2 to 2 inches due to breakage from glue-in weaves :sad:. I knew it was something I had to do and it would be a different look. When I first had it done in the salon it was cut and texterized and I grew to love the look. I kept it that way for over 2 1/2 years. It was so easy to keep up with, just dampen with water, spray on some olive oil, and then some S-curl gel. All the moisture did help it to grow but I would always cut it to keep that style. Well, sometime in 2008, I decided to severly overprocess my hair because it seemed like the texturizer wasn't taking anymore like it used to. On top of that I had thinning edges. Now mind you I hadn't had braids for at least two years and I would texturize my edges last during a process. So one day I decided to order ScalpMed for hair loss. It worked but it's one of those where if you stop using it your hair falls out. I started in May 2008 and stopped in July, August 2008 due to not being able to afford it anymore. My edges were bald by the end of the year and my cute little style was beginning to look a little jacked. So I seen a dermatologist who said that if the ScalpMed worked to go back on it :perplexed: :nono: So in January 2009 I got the scissors and cut my hair down to about 1/2 to get rid of the overprocessed and start over. I'm so glad I did. I took some FastGrow hair vitamins and began using coconut oil. Here's the kicker: I used only coconut oil in my hair in the am and nothing else and covered with a scarf. I had no style options. :ohwell: In the pm I used a leave in con. I shampooed and conditioned once a week. Somehow my hair still managed to grow. I am still struggling with my edges although they are making a comeback slooowly but surely. Needless to say after all my hair trials and tribulations I have learned so much from this forum and now my hair to date is around 4 inches. I know that's a big whoopty-doo to most of y'all but that's good for me. So I guess my setback was thinking evco was a moisturizer and using shampoo constantly for awhile. Experience is the best teacher ya dig?
 
I'm starting a modified regimen of PSing, vits, exercise, etc (details in my blog) to overcome my latest disaster visit to a salon. My ends are shot, so I will be dusting, DCing and PSing my way outta this...
 
In January 09 I realized that my edges and nape were all broken off. I basically ignored them. Kept them gelled and brushed down and didn't even notice the damage until it was too late!

Here's a link to the thread I made about it. I felt so bad at the time. You ladies really did make me feel better!
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=327525v


The pics on the left are from Jan. The pics on the right are from September. I made sure to moisturize and keep the edges and nape oiled with castor oil.

edge-vi.jpg


1-vi.jpg


You can do it!
 
2 setbacks (and sorry but I have no pictures)

I've only had two setbacks. The first one was a terrible case of traction alopecia. I allowed my hair to be braided in cornrows with weave. It was kind of tight, but I didn't think anything of it. four days later my hairline was jacked up. I woke up to bulbs flying in the air. My hair had been pulled out.

What I did? My answer is that I did nothing. I took care of my hair as I normally would have. The cornrows were my first attempt at "transitioning" (but I didn't call it that. I had no knowledge of LHCF/NP and all this 'hair jargon'). I just took the braids out and cut off all my hair. The first six months I greased my scalp and edges regularly with Softee Indian Hemp. I mean, it just grew back out and I thank God for that.




The only other setback I had was allowing my hair to be colored and not taking care of my ends. They were super raggedy from wearing my hair loose so much, and I never sealed.


I transitioned out of the hair color for like a year and I cut it off a few weeks ago. It was about three inches. Now I've made sure to not wear my hair loose, and I always seal my ends with castor oil. That stuff is a godsend. I read somewhere about using it to prevent knots. It works extremely well.

My ends no longer feel crispy. I'm really confident that I'll be able to retain my length now.
 
I had a set back in 2008 where I had to cut off about 4 inches of hair. I got a weave taken out then went to get a relaxer THEN the stylist ended up permanently dying my hair instead of using a rinse and my hair started to break BAD. the crown was all chewed up. The length of my hair in the siggy pic is what it was and ended up with neck length hair. Then I got layers put in my hair in lliiikkkeee september..

DSC01365-1.jpg


and now once again its starting to grow back into

Photoon2009-12-03at2020.jpg


bangs were way up above the eyebrows and now they are just about to the end of my eyes. this is all from me not going to these bad stylists in this town and learning how to take care of my hair which has been beneficial financially plus if I mess up my hair, its on me.
 
Last edited:
Back
Top