Forgetting your ring?

[likewtr4chklit]

Okay first let me say, I didn't make a big deal out of it, I mentioned it...everytime it's happened. The first time DH forgot to wear his ring outside the house I laughed, because we were out with the whole family and everyone pointed it out. He was embarrassed. So in the past few months since we've been married he's left it at his job (he took it off to take a shower), he's left for work, he's gone to hang out, etc. None of these times do I make a big deal and he seems genuinely sorry. But today I told him, well maybe I should stop wearing mine ( I wasn't serious, because I don't take mine off, it's Tungsten Carbide so it's practically indestructible), so with that he got upset like I shouldn't even say anything when he doesn't wear his ring.

My question to you:

1. Do you forget your ring? Often, rarely?
2. How do you react when DH forgets his?

 

[envybeauty]

Okay first let me say, I didn't make a big deal out of it, I mentioned it...everytime it's happened. The first time DH forgot to wear his ring outside the house I laughed, because we were out with the whole family and everyone pointed it out. He was embarrassed. So in the past few months since we've been married he's left it at his job (he took it off to take a shower), he's left for work, he's gone to hang out, etc. None of these times do I make a big deal and he seems genuinely sorry. But today I told him, well maybe I should stop wearing mine ( I wasn't serious, because I don't take mine off, it's Tungsten Carbide so it's practically indestructible), so with that he got upset like I shouldn't even say anything when he doesn't wear his ring.

My question to you:

1. Do you forget your ring? Often, rarely?
2. How do you react when DH forgets his?

I hope some other ladies will chime in and say these things are not red flags.... because I think I may be reading much into the fact that as a newlywed, he is leaving his ring off far too often.

 

[MissLawyerLady]

If it bothers you that your DH forgets his ring, and your DH knows that it bothers you then he should make a serious effort to wear his ring.

 

[Chameleonchick]

Yes I have forgotten to wear my ring only when I am in a rush and misplaced it. He has forgotten to wear his ring also many times. In the beginning of our marriage I would get so pissed and vise versa but now not so much as long as its only while working out or stuff like that.

 

[dlewis]

1. Do you forget your ring? Often, rarely? Sometimes, I wear mine often, maybe 70% of the time.

2. How do you react when DH forgets his? I use to get really upset when he would not wear it. I would not wear mine to get back at him. Thankfully I past that and now I really don't care. Now he gets really upset when he see that I have forgotten mine.

 

[~~HoneyComb~~]

DH: He gained weight and can't fit his, so he can't wear it (I'm not buying another one), it doesn't bother me.

Me: I never liked wearing rings, they make my fingers feel like they're choking. I don't wear them at all when I'm home, but I try to remember to wear them when I'm out.

 

[R4L]

What does he do that he showers at work? I know a lot of people don't like to wear rings at work b/c they're working with chemicals or worried the ring might get hooked on something.

 

[likewtr4chklit]

What does he do that he showers at work? I know a lot of people don't like to wear rings at work b/c they're working with chemicals or worried the ring might get hooked on something.

He works at a law firm that has a fitness center, and sometimes he works out.

....................................................................................................

From the responses it seems like this is normal and nothing to be alarmed about. Any other ideas

 

[miami74]

I've forgotten to wear mine once in a blue moon and DH is quick to point it out. I don't recall him ever forgetting to wear his, but if he did, I wouldn't be happy about it.

 

[Vanity1]

DH is pretty consistant with wearing his band, even when he is playing basketball, which I wish he wouldn't cause one of his diamonds in his band fell out that way. In the time he hasn't worn it though, I really didn't care about it, I trust him unless he gives me reason to otherwise.

I wear mines for the most part unless I forget or am doing things such as working out, washing dishes, etc.

 

[likewtr4chklit]

DH is pretty consistant with wearing his band, even when he is playing basketball, which I wish he wouldn't cause one of his diamonds in his band fell out that way. In the time he hasn't worn it though, I really didn't care about it, I trust him unless he gives me reason to otherwise.

I wear mines for the most part unless I forget or am doing things such as working out, washing dishes, etc.

I think my DH's grief mainly comes from him thinking that I mention his forgetfulness because I don't trust him, but that's not it at all ( a ring don't stop no show if there's gonna be one). I just trying to understand why I can wear my ring everyday and he cant.

 

[Vanity1]

I think my DH's grief mainly comes from him thinking that I mention his forgetfulness because I don't trust him, but that's not it at all ( a ring don't stop no show if there's gonna be one). I just trying to understand why I can wear my ring everyday and he cant.

You know men got their double standards. There were times when we were engaged that I didn't wear my ring and he was pissed. And there have been a couple of times while we were out while married he asked me if I had my set on. Thats just what they do, I guess you just have to bring that to their attention verbally to show them how silly it is.

 

[JustKiya]

I never take mine off unless I'm cooking something messy, and then I put it on once I've done. I've left the house with it a couple of times - depending on how close to home I was when I noticed, I'll usually go back and get it.
DH almost never takes his off, either. *shrug*
But then, we are also both very used to wearing jewelry. Is this his first ring? It's hard to adjust to wearing one, at first, and it's easier to forget it. Personally, it would concern me more later in the marriage, than now.

 

[Lynn84]

My hubby always has his on unless he is working out, playing sports, etc.
I'm the one who used to always forget it.
I've never been big on wearing any sort of jewlery at all so I would often forget & have to catch myself heading out the door without my ring.
I'm so used to wearing it now that it feels weird when its not on my finger

 

[Cichelle]

My DH always wears his ring. I've never seen him without it since we've been married, except during certain prayers and when he's washing. I don't wear mine at home and sometimes forget to put them on when I go out. It isn't that I don't want to wear my rings. (I usually get annoyed with myself for forgetting them.) It just slips my mind, especially when I'm in a hurry. I probably remember about six or seven times out of ten. My DH never says anything about it one way or another.

 

[DarkHair]

1. Do you forget your ring? Often, rarely?
I do, only if I've been cleaning

2. How do you react when DH forgets his?
I call him and ask him 'Where's your ring?' He'll say that its in the garage/by the bed or whatever. Today he said 'In the kitchen by yours'. He thought he left it at work.

You have to give him so space on it if he's not used to wearing a ring. I don't fuss about it anymore, as long as he knows where it's at. We've been married for almost ten months and he takes it off to do stuff, so I know his reasoning. And as my divorced brother says 'Girls and guys like you more when they see the wedding ring'. So it doesn't bother me that bad.

 

[spelmanlocks]

Both I and DH nearly always have our rings on when we are outside of our house. The only time we don't wear them is when we're at home. We've been married for 4 months and we did forget a few times within the first month but now we're pretty good about remembering to wear it. I feel naked without my ring on now. It would bother me if he continuously forgot to wear it only because it would bring to mind a shady friend of ours who never wears his ring.

 

[socurlyqt]

Granted..im not married. But i do have my college graduation ring, and to be honest no matter what ive done, unless its been something thats gonna to hurt my hand (basketball, tennis, baseball), ive never taken that off.

I mean its a ring, its gold/platinum..it can get wet it wont turn green soo whats up with ppl taking if off in the shower?? Is it to big or something? are they scared its gonna fall off....(side eye to that)

 

[septemberbaby]

1. Do you forget your ring? Often, rarely? I never forget to wear my rings. When my skin underneath them gets dry, I'll take them off for a few days to moisturize my skin and get it back to "normal".

2. How do you react when DH forgets his? DH doesn't forget. When we first got married, DH would wear his wedding ring to work all of the time. Then he stopped wearing it to work. I was annoyed and let him know and he told me that it could get damaged at his job. Our rings weren't cheap, so I was cool with that! So we got him a cheap, plain band for him to wear while he's working. Problem solved!

 

[Tylers-mom]

We only wear our rings when we're outside...I always take mine off as soon as I get home so not to damage it. It's precious to me! And him pretty much the same...

My husband's never forgotten his ring....we've been married for 6 years, together for almost 13. In fact there's been times where he's forgotten when we were going out and he's run all the way back to get it!! We both are pretty much addicted to our rings...BUT I don't believe marraige is about the "ring". Some married couples don't wear them at all. But if it's something that's important to you (as it is to me) then my feelings would be a bit hurt if he continuously forgot his ring.

 

[Honi]

I've taken mine off many times because I don't like it when conditioner gets in it.

Hubby rarely takes his off. If he sees me without mine he'll ask me where mine is and give me this look.

 

[firecracker]

Forget the ring. He needs to ack right!

 

[naturalmanenyc]

I have forgotten my ring before (left it in cleaning solution) but remembered it before I got too far to turn back. I have also left it in the shower (washing hair) or on the kitchen counter (dishes) but I have yet to make it to work without my rings.

DH forgot his a few times, once by the kitchen sink (he took it off when he did the dishes) and I saw it in the bathroom. The last time he forgot it I said something like "are we single today?" and he's never forgotten it again. In fact, he called all frantic once when he left it on the kitchen counter.

 

[drasgrl]

Some people are not jewelry wearing people, myself included. I wouldn't even want to waste money buying a ring because I know I will never wear it. I wouldn't get mad at my man for not wearing his. But in light of the other thread by the OP I would say this definitely sounds like a red flag.

 

[Zaynab]

Dh has never taken his wedding band off in almost 10 years, he works in it, plays basketball in it, works in the yard in it, swims in it, showers in it.

I am guilty of not wearing my rings, mostly b/c my engagement ring would get snagged on stuff and then I couldn't wear them to work, so I would pull both of them off together. It's not often outside of work that I would forget them though.

 

[lonei]

DH has NEVER taken his off for the whole year and 3 months we have been married. Even when he plays basketball he just tapes it up or just leaves it on as normal. I take mine off to do my hair only on wash days every 3 weeks but not really other than that. It feels funny when i dont have it on so I kinda always remember..

 

[FAMUDva]

So far (only been married since 8/29) he consistantly wears his ring. His ring is Tungston Carbide and there is no need for him to take it off.

He would be upset if I didn't wear mine, I wouldn't be upset if it's an occasional thing for him... but I would be if he consistantly left it off. He's not left the house without his ring on yet... well except when we kept our marriage a secret from Aug til Oct. He has always worn it since the public wedding.

 

[TheseStankyLegs]

So far (only been married since 8/29) he consistantly wears his ring. His ring is Tungston Carbide and there is no need for him to take it off.

He would be upset if I didn't wear mine, I wouldn't be upset if it's an occasional thing for him... but I would be if he consistantly left it off. He's not left the house without his ring on yet... well except when we kept our marriage a secret from Aug til Oct. He has always worn it since the public wedding.

I have saw you seeing this before. Just out of curiosity, why did you hide your marriage from your fam and friens, only to remarry again publicly months later. The curiosity is killing me.

 

[mxdchiq86]

i forget my ring every once in a blue moon. hubby never forgets his ring, ever. actually, his band is all beat up 'cause he works with his hands all day and keeps his ring on. it's all good tho, we have a warranty on it.. he'll get it replaced later lol

as far as forgetting, i don't think it's a sign of infidelity.. it's more so a respect issue.

 

[FAMUDva]

I have saw you seeing this before. Just out of curiosity, why did you hide your marriage from your fam and friens, only to remarry again publicly months later. The curiosity is killing me.

LOL!
It was really nothing serious... He asked me to marry him in June 08, and he wanted us to get married the same weekend we originally met 9 yrs before; which would have been Aug. 28th. Well, I knew I wanted a small beach wedding and couldn't pull it off in like 6 wks on my budget, so we made a compromise...

We got married on Aug 29 at the JOP (because it was a Friday and 1 day after our 9 yr dating anniversary) then went to the beach and chilled that weekend and came back and continued planning the wedding I wanted. We chose to keep it somewhat of a secret because I'm an only child for my mom and didn't want her to feel left out... in the end I ended up telling her on my actually marriage date in Aug anyway. It was only a surprise to my guests.

It's more common than you think that folks go to the JOP and get married before they tell anyone... So, I had the wedding I wanted, and he has the actual anniversary (well 1 day short) that he wanted All's fair in love.