Experiences Dating A Single Man (never Married) And A Divorced Man

[**SaSSy**]

Can you please list your experiences dating a single never been married man and then your experiences dating a divorced man. I'm sure with the divorce man he comes with baggage (ex-wife, kids) but beside that, what other similarities and difference do these type of men have worth mentioning?

 

[movingforward13]

Depending on how bad the divorce was, divorced men (in my opinion) say they don't want to get married again versus men who have never been married.
There is a loss of innocence, if you can understand that, that comes with a man who has already been married.

Not saying all and this is limited to my experience.

 

[awhyley]

The single man could have an ex with kids as well, and may never want to get married because of past experiences. The sword cuts both ways.

 

[BrownSkin2]

To me it seems like the divorced man knows better how to treat a woman because his ex-wife trained him, where as a single man that's never married is more self-centered. Its more about them than you, especially if he's over 35. He's so use to living alone and just taking care of himself, he not as 'aware'. This is for some IME.

Also studies show that divorced men will marry again quicker than a never married man over a certain age.

 

[DarkJoy]

At my age (over 40) i refuse to date never married (and no kids) men from the experiences i had with them:

• Self centered. priorities dont align with mine
• Unmindful or insensitive of time constrictions because i have a kid. they had no responsibility besides work.
• Sometimes too desperate to settle down or the opposite--too aloof.
• Dont understand how a family unit should work as opposed to individuals within the unit

Divorced men come in a couple of flavors and there are some with certain baggage I wont fool with:

• Deadbeats
• Semi-deadbeats, meaning they moved away from their kids after the divorce and their time with them is far between
• Still pining for the former family. I aint nobody's rebound

There are deadbeat baby daddies but like i said, i dont fool with over 40 never marrieds.

 

[sgold04]

I've dated 2 divorced men with no kids. In my experience they have more realistic expectations of women and marriage and owned up to their part in their failed marriages. Both are early 30s and desire to marry again. (Both courted me for marriage but I wasn't too into one, and I got a job out of state when things started blossoming with the other )

Never married with no kids over 33 seem to have unrealistic expectations for women and shoot way out of their league. Fours trying to get with nines and tens. Over 40, they are bat **** crazy: recalcitrant or extremely socially inept.

All generalizations of course....

 

[Browndilocks]

I've dated only 1 divorced man. He was 5 years divorced at the time. IME he was a lot more conscious of his behavior than a man who was never married. A whole lot more thoughtful and considerate. He said he previously married for all the wrong reasons and went thru hell because of it. Ironically he said that he's determined to never make that mistake again and definitely wants to remarry.

 

[chocolat79]

Everything has pretty much been said. Divorced men are more attentive, more apt to take care of you, more aware.

These never marrieds can be a trip, as has been mentioned.

 

[Browndilocks]

I’ve found that the problem with dating a divorced man is he lacks sensitivity to the things you may view as big. For example, because he’s been married before, it’s easier for him to decide to get married with a matter-of-fact type of disposition. Whereas you may be saying “omg” “I’m not sure” “is this really going to happen” and he’s like yeah, no biggie. There’s somewhat of a lack of excitement and newness due to him having been there done that. He knows exactly what he wants this time, which can be a very good thing, but he can be all cool cucumber about it while your heart is beating a thousand times a minute.

With single guys, there’s a certain type of fun mystery that’s nice to maintain or unlock together during a relationship. If you’re wearing white pants and get a period stain you’re likely to DIE in front of the single guy and he’s going to feel awkward… but yall will get thru it together. The divorced guy is more likely to tell you about the stain, then go to the store and get your feminine products for you and he’ll be so cool about it that you won’t even trip.

 

[awhyley]

*takes notes*

This is really more interesting than I expected, as I figured the divorced man would be a lesser candidate due to bitterness and baggage, so I tended to avoid them. May have to re-think this one.

 

[DarkJoy]

*takes notes*

This is really more interesting than I expected, as I figured the divorced man would be a lesser candidate due to bitterness and baggage, so I tended to avoid them. May have to re-think this one.

Dont buy the Lhcf vitriol regarding divorced men (and women) and baggage

Judge each man *irl* on his individual characteristics and actions.