Exes and contact?

[syze6]

When you run into an ex, do you exchange numbers? My cousin and I were out shopping and we ran into her ex who is also married. My cousin was crazy about this man. She had a fwb relationship off and on for years with this man. She fell hard for him during that time together and they would always pop back in each other lives over the years. They exchanged numbers after not seeing each other for years.

She said most people do so, because in the moment you really don't have time to catch up. So she tells me that he actually called her two days later, and I ask her what now? It just seems a door has been opened for her to communicate with him. She says it's innocent but she has yet to mention it to her husband. even though they have been talking for 4 weeks now.

I have run into an exes and hugged and wished them well, but never exchanged contact information. She says, I act like a restrained child. I figure...I'm glad to see they are well but I don't know what we would have to talk about with each other after so many years. I have been called a prude time and time again. How many of you ladies do this? Is it even worth mentioning to you SO or husband?

 

[Holla]

She knows what's up which is why she hasn't mentioned it to her husband over the last four weeks. If most people do it (according to her), then she should have no problem mentioning it to hubby....bc after all...wouldn't that mean that hubby does it too? Or, is she the only one doing it?

 

[kandake]

People don't do that unless they trying to rekindle something.

 

[syze6]

I doubt if he has mentioned it to his wife either.

 

[Lymegreen]

This situation is different because your cousin has had a sexual history with this exec. There is history between them and possibilities of re-kindling the 'sexual' relationship.

This is not the run of the mill - I ran into an old exec situation.

This is how affairs get started.
jmo

 

[syze6]

This situation is different because your cousin has had a sexual history with this exec. There is history between them and possibilities of re-kindling the 'sexual' relationship.

This is not the run of the mill - I ran into an old exec situation.

This is how affairs get started.
jmo

I said the same to her. When she was giving her number out, I side-eyed BOTH of them. I didn't see the need for him to have her number again, after two marriages between the two and almost 7 years passing by. I told her the fact that he called so soon raises an eyebrow but I told her do you! I'll stay in my lane with my restrained child self! LOL!

 

[PeaceFlow]

I do believe this happens fairly often, but it's definitely different if you're married. It doesn't seem like they are trying to protect their marriages.

He obviously has a hold on her if he was able to fob her off with FWB for years. Plus the not telling their partners about the contact = High risk situation.

I can have a quick chat to exes, but I don't like them anymore and I would let my FH know I bumped into them.

 

[NinasLongAmbition]

Sorry to be so crass but she's going to screw him, if she hasn't already. Poor hubby.

 

[bklynbornNbred]

There's a big difference between running into your high school sweetheart that you haven't seen in 20 years and some ex FWB that never claimed you publicly. If she truly didn't give a darn she would have walked away and let him stew with wondering what if. Instead she's given him her number and trying to play the "we just catching up card". Trust if he wanted to know what she was up to he'd make a way to find out. He sniffing to see if she simple enough to sleep with him and it sounds like she is. Hope it's worth losing everything.

 

[syze6]

I do believe this happens fairly often, but it's definitely different if you're married. It doesn't seem like they are trying to protect their marriages.

He obviously has a hold on her if he was able to fob her off with FWB for years. Plus the not telling their partners about the contact = High risk situation.

I can have a quick chat to exes, but I don't like them anymore and I would let my FH know I bumped into them.

He had a big hold on her! She may have had a hold on him as well. Before he got married they would somehow end up back in contact with each other. Even though he was in a relationship. The last time he called her up out the blue after a couple of years, I side-eyed the whole situation. Then he was married but she was in a long term relationship with her now husband. He dropped out of her life, just a quick as he came, after all the back and forth exchanges. She felt some type of way about him being ghost.

Then we bump into this ninja at the mall and now they talking like years ago never happened?. Our other cousin said maybe they are meant to be together because they keep meeting up and I don't understand sexual chemistry and connection....please! I don't understand playing with fire when I have a good man at home, when I know this guy wasn't shish back then and dropped out of my life.

I told her, they were meant to be together when BOTH were single, not after two marriages involved. I understand people grow and run into each other but I all that is needed is to exchange nothing but pleasantries at that moment. LOL!

 

[PretteePlease]

You are an ex for a reason. There is no reason to be in contact. If you are married ask yourself would I be ok with my spouse having contact with his ex?

 

[ThickHair]

If you wouldn't want your spouse to do it then it would be a bad idea.

I am sure they exchanged mutliple text msgs before the day was over to set up a booty call. Not cute at all.

 

[syze6]

I agree he could have gotten in contact before now because they have mutual friends.The crazy thing is she has a GOOOOOOD man. The man worships the ground she walks on. He really is a great catch and we all see it. She thinks because she didn't make the first call, it's not on her. I just shook my head and what's crazy is this fool is married to the same girl he had dated for years! The same girl he was with, with their on and off fwb situation. He was a fool then, now he is a married fool! I don't know if it's a "see what you missed" thing but, I told her he isn't worth it!

 

[InchHighPrivateEye]

He had a big hold on her! She may have had a hold on him as well. Before he got married they would somehow end up back in contact with each other. Even though he was in a relationship. The last time he called her up out the blue after a couple of years, I side-eyed the whole situation. Then he was married but she was in a long term relationship with her now husband. He dropped out of her life, just a quick as he came, after all the back and forth exchanges. She felt some type of way about him being ghost. Then we bump into this ninja at the mall and they now they talking like years ago never happened?. Our other cousin said maybe they are meant to be together because they keep meeting up and I don't understand sexual chemistry and connection....please! I don't understand playing with fire when I have a good man at home, when I know this guy wasn't shish back then and dropped out of my life. I told her, they were meant to be together when BOTH were single, not after two marriages involved. I understand people grow and run into each other but I all that is needed is to exchange nothing but pleasantries at that moment. LOL!

Ummmm. She's about to let this trifling dude mess her life up so he can brag about it.

 

[klb120475]

No, definitely don't exchange numbers. As a matter of fact I almost ran into my ex today. I was walking in the gas station to pay for some gas and saw him at the register. I quickly ran to the back of the store and hid behind the chips. Then I had to stand on my tip toes (I'm short) to watch him go to the car and pull off.

 

[missliberia]

No, definitely don't exchange numbers. As a matter of fact I almost ran into my ex today. I was walking in the gas station to pay for some gas and saw him at the register. I quickly ran to the back of the store and hid behind the chips. Then I had to stand on my tip toes (I'm short) to watch him go to the car and pull off.

Girl you are a mess. This is something I would do.

 

[girlonfire]

duplicate post

 

[girlonfire]

Well...with me and my ex I don't think he'll be exchanging numbers with me any time soon, and we work together. I don't like it when people say"they're your ex for a reason" because I like to think that circumstances change and so do people (sometimes).

Anyway. I agree with the consensus here, he's tryna start something like the late great MJ, may he rest peacefully. If I don't want to talk to you, I would turn a sharp left speed walking for the hills when I see your face, profile, shadow, sense your presence or all of the above.

 

[CaraWalker]

There's a big difference between running into your high school sweetheart that you haven't seen in 20 years and some ex FWB that never claimed you publicly. If she truly didn't give a darn she would have walked away and let him stew with wondering what if. Instead she's given him her number and trying to play the "we just catching up card". Trust if he wanted to know what she was up to he'd make a way to find out. He sniffing to see if she simple enough to sleep with him and it sounds like she is. Hope it's worth losing everything.

ice cold

 

[summertimewine]

She acting like a hoe.

You aren't a prude, you're right and she doesn't want to admit it so she's being hateful towards you.

 

[KaramelKendra]

You are an ex for a reason. There is no reason to be in contact. If you are married ask yourself would I be ok with my spouse having contact with his ex?

I agree with this

 

[Godsdaughter001]

syze6, any updates on your cousin and this guy? Interesting thread

 

[cre8]

I definitely would not be exchanging numbers with an ex because we have absolutely nothing to talk about.

I received a friend request on fb from a guy I dated briefly nearly 20 years ago. He sent a message talking about he wanted to catch up. I responded to his message confirming I am married and now we are caught up, no need to accept his request LOL

 

[syze6]

syze6, any updates on your cousin and this guy? Interesting thread

When I talked to her last she said she talked to him a couple of times after that but stopped. I don't know if she just said that or she realized nothing was different about him after all these years. He was a dog then and I'm sure a dog now! LOL!