"Don't Be Pregnant on My Wedding Day--It's MY Day!"

[Supergirl]

Okay, I was reading on the Ent. forum about a Bridezilla who made her sister have her labor induced so as not to interfere with her wedding.

This reminded me of a friend of mine that has an older sis. Older sis is already married and has recently decided it's time to start a family. At around the same time, the younger sis got engaged. Well, the younger sis doesn't want the older sis to be pregnant at the wedding, because she somehow feels that this will take some of the attention away from her. (don't know when weddings started being about getting attention, but anyway...) I tried to tell her that she was being a little too demanding in this particular "request." But she is so serious about it. If it makes a difference, she's white.

What do you all think of this?

 

[gone_fishing]

I think I would have told both bridezilla sisters where to go and how to get there as expeditiously as possible.

 

[CurleeDST]

It's ridiculous in my opinion. Everyone else's life does not STOP just b/c a couple decides to get married ONE DAY! A wedding only lasts HOURS at best. Typically the couple spends a year planning and spending and barely remember the special day b/c it goes by FAST!

If I had someone ask that of me I guess I would just be uninvited b/c I would NOT oblige them.

 

[SEMO]

Okay, I was reading on the Ent. forum about a Bridezilla who made her sister have her labor induced so as not to interfere with her wedding.

That is simply crazy to me. I hope her sister will not be asking the bride to babysit in the future. She obviously doesn't really care about her sister or her child.

 

[Tenejita10473]

I think that's absolutely selfish. And says alot about her character.

 

[camellia]

Wow, some people think a bit much of themselves, hmmmm?

I wouldn't be in either wedding. I'm not going to plan my life and family around a wedding that lasts a day a most.

 

[Laginappe]

I’ve had to stop watching Bridezillas because I was about to reach through the screen at a couple and I don’t want to go tv shopping right now.

I think that the Bridezilla phenom is nothing new, but its getting worse and worse. One of the worst cases I’ve heard of was the bride who HIRED her wedding party from members of her gym. She and her groom were heavy into their bodies, working out, appearances etc. and decided that their friends and family weren’t attrative enough to be in their wedding party. They a model perfect wedding party.

Weddings and funerals bring out the worst in people.

 

[Priss Pot]

Brides are really doing that? erplexed

The only issue I see with a bridesmaid becoming pregnant during the wedding planning is the fact that she may have to pay for another dress or get the current one re-altered.

 

[gone_fishing]

I’ve had to stop watching Bridezillas because I was about to reach through the screen at a couple and I don’t want to go tv shopping right now.

I think that the Bridezilla phenom is nothing new, but its getting worse and worse. One of the worst cases I’ve heard of was the bride who HIRED her wedding party from members of her gym. She and her groom were heavy into their bodies, working out, appearances etc. and decided that their friends and family weren’t attrative enough to be in their wedding party. They a model perfect wedding party.

Weddings and funerals bring out the worst in people.

AND it will continue to get worse now that the media is glamourizing the behavior. It's becoming the "in" thing to be a bridezilla.

 

[Supergirl]

I’ve had to stop watching Bridezillas because I was about to reach through the screen at a couple and I don’t want to go tv shopping right now.

I think that the Bridezilla phenom is nothing new, but its getting worse and worse. One of the worst cases I’ve heard of was the bride who HIRED her wedding party from members of her gym. She and her groom were heavy into their bodies, working out, appearances etc. and decided that their friends and family weren’t attrative enough to be in their wedding party. They a model perfect wedding party.

Weddings and funerals bring out the worst in people.

I don't even have any words for this.

 

[fmnnity]

I guess I am in the minority. . . it was pretty much up to the sister not to allow herself to be treated that way. But, as the bride, I would not have asked her to be in my wedding if that is how I felt in the first place. Truth be told, I don't really blame the brides. It is their big day and if you can't comply with their requests, simply decline. People thought it was a big deal that I once said that IF I ever got married my best friend would have to lose weight to be in my wedding.

We have all seen wedding pictures with a pregnant or a big girl in the wedding party. Our attention is immediately drawn there. So. . . I guess I can say that I understand. And when I was in my girlfriend's wedding she said we ALL (including herself) needed to lose weight before her nuptials. If I felt like she was asking too much, I would have said no. But it was her day and if she asked me to practice walking down the aisle on my hands, I would have done just that IF I wanted to be in her wedding.

 

[blasianbeauty]

Wow, some people think a bit much of themselves, hmmmm?

I wouldn't be in either wedding. I'm not going to plan my life and family around a wedding that lasts a day a most.

I agree, she (bride) has gone to far with this request. And I wouldn't be in the wedding either!

 

[Millahdoowop]

Yeah, I saw that ish. That woman was talking crazy. If it's that damned important set a later date or something. It says a lot about a person and where their mind is at going into a marriage. I want a nice wedding day as well, but if it's not perfect it's not going to matter. The only thing that should be on your mind is that you are getting married.

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

This is out of control. I truly think some women lose their brains as soon as he proposes...

 

[KEWLKAT103]

Wedding bring out the worst and best in people. Like the PP's said, it's one day. Then again if someone requested something crazy of me to be in their wedding, I would decline.
Have fun with your friends and fam and get over yourself!

 

[fattyfatfat]

exactly. I would be hurt if someone didnt want me in their wedding or treated me unfairly because of a pregnancy, weight gain or loss, hair gain or loss, etc. If I had a friend that was a bridezilla she would be one with a neckbrace.

Are there any groomzilla's?

Have fun with your friends and fam and get over yourself!

 

[♦K.O♦]

A couple of years ago I was watching a talk show (maybe Tyra) where the groom insisted that he and all of the men in the wedding party wear white Air Jordans with their Tuxedos. SMDH. He and the bride just couldnt agree and their relationship was being stressed because of it.

If a friend/relative of mine didnt think that I was good enough to be in her wedding party AS IS, I wouldnt accept the invite. I can understand the bride asking for a particular hairstyle or whatever, but to NOT be pregnant? Come on!

 

[BrooklynSouth]

Yea, I saw that episode. My fondest desire is for that heavy drinking bride to have a baby then have someone ask her to bake 28 cakes for them a few days after she delivers as she had her sister do for her!! Selfish critter.

 

[SweetCaramel1]

that entire family and town was hilarious she was in a drunken stupor 90% of the show.

 

[LocksOfLuV]

My boss was like this.

She as PISSED that her sister got pregnant on her wedding day. And when her sister told her, she said the first words that came out of her mouth were "But what about my wedding!"*I* think it was because she wanted all the attention on her, but she says that it is because she was worried about her fitting in her dress.

Her sister then miscarried and she felt HORRIBLE.

 

[deltagyrl]

Honestly Bridezilla's has turned into low-budget bridez. No class whatsoever.

I think it is ridiculous for a "bride" to make such silly demands of the bridal party and even more ridiculous for the bridal party to acquiesce.

 

[prettyinpurple]

Yeah I think it is tacky, rude, trifling to ask someone to not ATTEND the wedding b/c they are pregnant. I am not that much of an attention hog LOL.

However I'm thinking that I really wouldn't want anyone who is obviously pregnant in the wedding party. Now I have some tact and would break it to this person nicely. Heck I would change my wedding date if I found out that I would be EXTREMELY pregnant on the day I had chosen. I just don't want to have a big ol preggy belly on that day.

Now I'm not firm on this -- I would probably think twice about this if it was my sis or a really good friend, someone I might really want in the wedding party.

ETA: Now I would NEVER ask someone to induce labor or anything ridiculous like that, just so they wouldn't be pregnant that day. That is waaay over the line.

 

[Laginappe]

The bottom line is really basic. For a growing number of people a wedding and marriage is less about the commitment being made or the celebration of said commitment. It’s about appearances. It’s about telling your supposed friend who's a little or a lot overweight that "I don't really care about your support of me and my decision to commit to this man/woman... the overall important fact is that you're too fat to participate. Lose some weight or get lost." And if said friend doesn’t hit the gym immedialty then THEY’RE the ones not being a supportive and/or nurturing friend!

But maybe things are just on a slide towards that mindset. Bridezillas used to be a rare joke and now they seem to be the norm. I wish someone would try to dictate my pregnancy/labor/delivery decisions based on a ONE DAY PARTY. I really wish they would. TRY to find a jury that would convict me.

If having a perfect bridal party is that important then maybe I need to start up a niche wedding business providing faux wedding parties. Along the lines of the couple I posted about earlier. Have models on hand with perfect hair, perfect makeup, and especially perfect bodies. Ready for hire at rates starting at maybe… $200 per hour?? They’d only need be present for the ceremony and photos immediatley after. Reception photos can be created during editing after the fact. And they’d show up on time, dressed as requested, no complaints about shoes, hair, makeup etc. They’d be guaranteed not to buldge, sweat, squint, frown, or trip. Botox injections will be included at cost so as to insure faces that photograph as at least interested. (Fake expressions of joy will – understandably - cost extra.) And truly emotionally supportive tasks like providing shoulders to lean and/or cry on will cost more extra.

And maybe I can charge fees on a scale. Simple pink satin? $200 per. Puce chiffon with hoopskirt, ruffles and rhinestones? $850 min - but the fake smiles are included. Referring back to the Botox clause.

But back to the pregnant bridesmaid issue. To me, telling a woman that her pregnant belly is not acceptable in your wedding speaks volumes at to how you view women in general and pregnant women specifically. As if it was 1734 and women were supposed to stay confined during their pregnancy. What year is this again? I really want to be shocked at what I’m reading but I’m not. As with anything in life, anything goes as long as things LOOK like they match your idea of “perfect”.

When it all comes down to it, everything before and behind the actual “I Do’s” is a party. That’s it. So telling a person – especially your supposed friend / family member - that they can’t participate because of their body type, gestation phase and/or medical condition is shallow and seriously unworthy of the level of commitment these folks are claiming that they’re ready to make. What’s next? Your skin is too wrinkled for an invite to my dinner party? And really heaven forefend a person’s spouse falling ill or just subcoming to simple life and age. Folks like this would probably lock a 60yr old up in the closet for daring to have laugh lines or crows feet!

 

[LocksOfLuV]

The bottom line is really basic. For a growing number of people a wedding and marriage is less about the commitment being made or the celebration of said commitment. It’s about appearances. It’s about telling your supposed friend who's a little or a lot overweight that "I don't really care about your support of me and my decision to commit to this man/woman... the overall important fact is that you're too fat to participate. Lose some weight or get lost." And if said friend doesn’t hit the gym immedialty then THEY’RE the ones not being a supportive and/or nurturing friend!

But maybe things are just on a slide towards that mindset. Bridezillas used to be a rare joke and now they seem to be the norm. I wish someone would try to dictate my pregnancy/labor/delivery decisions based on a ONE DAY PARTY. I really wish they would. TRY to find a jury that would convict me.

If having a perfect bridal party is that important then maybe I need to start up a niche wedding business providing faux wedding parties. Along the lines of the couple I posted about earlier. Have models on hand with perfect hair, perfect makeup, and especially perfect bodies. Ready for hire at rates starting at maybe… $200 per hour?? They’d only need be present for the ceremony and photos immediatley after. Reception photos can be created during editing after the fact. And they’d show up on time, dressed as requested, no complaints about shoes, hair, makeup etc. They’d be guaranteed not to buldge, sweat, squint, frown, or trip. Botox injections will be included at cost so as to insure faces that photograph as at least interested. (Fake expressions of joy will – understandably - cost extra.) And truly emotionally supportive tasks like providing shoulders to lean and/or cry on will cost more extra.

And maybe I can charge fees on a scale. Simple pink satin? $200 per. Puce chiffon with hoopskirt, ruffles and rhinestones? $850 min - but the fake smiles are included. Referring back to the Botox clause.

But back to the pregnant bridesmaid issue. To me, telling a woman that her pregnant belly is not acceptable in your wedding speaks volumes at to how you view women in general and pregnant women specifically. As if it was 1734 and women were supposed to stay confined during their pregnancy. What year is this again? I really want to be shocked at what I’m reading but I’m not. As with anything in life, anything goes as long as things LOOK like they match your idea of “perfect”.

When it all comes down to it, everything before and behind the actual “I Do’s” is a party. That’s it. So telling a person – especially your supposed friend / family member - that they can’t participate because of their body type, gestation phase and/or medical condition is shallow and seriously unworthy of the level of commitment these folks are claiming that they’re ready to make. What’s next? Your skin is too wrinkled for an invite to my dinner party? And really heaven forefend a person’s spouse falling ill or just subcoming to simple life and age. Folks like this would probably lock a 60yr old up in the closet for daring to have laugh lines or crows feet!

Wow thank you!

THANK YOU! Just saying that you don't want anyone fat or pregnant in your wedding speaks milestones about a person. I can't believe people are actually justifying that MESS. Yes MESS. A baby is waaay more important than your little 4 hours of fame (which have a 50/50 chance of ending anyway).

Weddings nowadays are a JOKE. All everyone care about is sitting pretty and pretending.

 

[calm_delight]

I guess I am in the minority. . . it was pretty much up to the sister not to allow herself to be treated that way. But, as the bride, I would not have asked her to be in my wedding if that is how I felt in the first place. Truth be told, I don't really blame the brides. It is their big day and if you can't comply with their requests, simply decline. People thought it was a big deal that I once said that IF I ever got married my best friend would have to lose weight to be in my wedding.

We have all seen wedding pictures with a pregnant or a big girl in the wedding party. Our attention is immediately drawn there. So. . . I guess I can say that I understand. And when I was in my girlfriend's wedding she said we ALL (including herself) needed to lose weight before her nuptials. If I felt like she was asking too much, I would have said no. But it was her day and if she asked me to practice walking down the aisle on my hands, I would have done just that IF I wanted to be in her wedding.

I know this is an exaggeration but if a ***** asked me to "walk down the aisle on my hands" (or a request equal to this) , I would cuss that ***** out! For real.

exactly. I would be hurt if someone didnt want me in their wedding or treated me unfairly because of a pregnancy, weight gain or loss, hair gain or loss, etc. If I had a friend that was a bridezilla she would be one with a neckbrace.

Are there any groomzilla's?

That was funny as heck! I really did LOL --

Yea, I saw that episode. My fondest desire is for that heavy drinking bride to have a baby then have someone ask her to bake 28 cakes for them a few days after she delivers as she had her sister do for her!! Selfish critter.

OT to OP: Maybe it's because I was young, but I really wasn't that fragile after I gave birth. Folks (my family especially) want to act like you're super delicate (like Gold Leaf ) and can't do ish - for like a whole 6 weeks or so after giving birth. I'm not saying I was lifting weights or running a marathon or anything but I was OK, even days after.
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Some people act as though folks like this (bridezilla) turn this way overnight. If you're this over the top and extra ... no one is really surprised that you'd pull a stunt like this. Ain't no newly crazy... So and so been foolish

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I KNOW this is an old thread and I don't care.

 

[phynestone]

I think there are always sign of a person's narcissic personality. They just happen to be magnified due to the stress of a wedding or a funeral. However, there's no excuse for such behavior and I would reevaluate my relationship with the demanding individual.

 

[Vanity1]

That's wild.
Two of my bridesmaids got pregnant while I was planning, and I still wanted them to be in it, but they chose not to for personal reasons.

 

[lonei]

I got married almost 1 year ago and had my older sister as my cheif and only bridesmaid. She was 8 months pregnant at the time. My only concern was that she found her own dress and got it altered to suite her and that seh would be ok with the 'task' (health wise). It was never about 'attention' gosh, that is so bad! I will add though that she spent most of her time joking with her friends rather than fixing my dress for the photos! Lol!