Do You Explain Your Hair To Whyte Folx?

[MissYocairis]

One time I went to one of those supercut places and this white woman asked me how often I relax my hair I told her one every 3-4 months..she was like "you don't even need to do it that often. 2-3 times a year at best"

Went to a korean beauty supply place and had a korean lady badger me when I went to go get a fall ..."why you do that..you have hair"...I said its for a different look, not b/c I don't have any hair...she didn't understand that.

@ adf's Korean impersonation.

 

[Syrah]

MsNadi, I appreciate your post. Just wanted/had to say that. It was classy and that's the way my mom brought me up. Some people would have lashed out at the mom and the little boy. Just wanted to give you props for educating in a "Disney" way

Hey...if I don't correct him, he's only other option is his imagination and thats how you end up with nonsense like 'black people are monkeys' and "blacck people are dirty".

Peopel walking around thinking we don't wash our hair ASSuming that our hair texture and scalp oils are similar to those of white people.

If you don't correct people, they don't change their attitudes and behavior. And it doesn't mean we have to get all deep on folks. It just means we recognize that people, when they ask questions, aren't coming from a malicious place (some of them are), but are really curious and trying to understand.

And I can't front like I haven't ever been curious about other cultures before.

 

[Lucie]

I'm mad that she only relaxes her hair "Once a month...."......

LOL!!!!!!!! Ditto

 

[Lucie]

Now THAT....I never knew! (eta: I mean, I never knew they were using head scarves at night too!)

My sister-in-law does it all the time.

 

[myco]

I had to share an experience that I had today.

We were having an informal cake party for one of my coworkers since today was her b-day. We were sitting around chit-chatting like women do and the conversation turned to hair. I had my hair down today, and everyone was complimenting me on how nice it looks when I wear it down, yada, yada. So then we got into a discussion of styling practices. This was fine with me. But there is one white chick who happens to be dating a black woman. Somehow she thinks that she has become the expert on black hair. Every question that someone asked me, she had to add her incorrect and limited $.02. Her girlfriend has dreads and not a relaxer so her styling practices are completely different from mine. I really wanted to tell her to shut up and let me speak. No, black people do not have to get relaxers. I choose to have one. No my hair is not crazy if I don't wear braids. Getting your hair combed is not always painful for black children. Woman just shut up!

 

[Barbara]

Some in addition to Whites hear stereotyped messages about us, and they just want to confirm them. I don't get offended, because they really want to know the truth.

 

[Soliel185]

They're completely and utterly fascinated by it. Especially if it's natural. I think that it takes awhile for some of them to work up the gumption to actually ask since we have a rep for benig sensitive about our hair. I've never had anyone say anything that was meant to be harmful, perhaps a bit tactless, but it's like when I small child asks you a question - they're so genuinely interested they don't realize it might sound bad, so I don't really mind.

 

[Evazhair]

My 2 cents: TMI!!!!!!

 

[Soliel185]

that's really interesting. why would they never ask-- is it just inappropriate, or is their disinterest, or is hair just hair, or what?

My grandfather is French ( Stepfather's father ) so I've been to Paris and what I noticed most was the *ahem* sexual interest of French men in black women regardless of their own race, and that they seemed very accepting of me -- before realizing I was American. When you think about it, alot of influential African Americans i.e Josephine Baker lived in France where they were considered free if exotic in order to escape American notions about the equality of Blacks. Also - they've colonized islands in the Pacific, and countries in Africa, so they're used to seeing us around. They probably already know most of the basics anyway.

 

[Soliel185]

Really It isn't anybodies business. If I get comments like "wow you changed your hair" I say " Yeah I decided to do something different with my hair" or "Yeah I decided to wear some curls or wear it straight"

If they ask if it is my hair I say "No they are extentions...you know like the ones Brittany Spears wears"

When I wear braids they always wanna know if I can wash my hair. I give them a weird look and say "Yes I can wash my hair"

It gets on my nerves when other races get misinformation from Black women and assume that ALL Black women must do the same things. Like the whole Monique not shaving her legs, or All Black women do this that or the other

I get asked about braids and washing - The thing that people are MOST surpised by, is the fact that our hair can grip itself the way it does. In their hair a braid would easily slide out if they attempted to wash where as with ours it's no big deal.