Darn that Chris Rock!!

[Ipanema]

I've been avoiding this movie, but I'm going to watch it to see what's in it.

When I first started wearing my twa out after wearing wigs during the winter, an older white neighbor gave me a compliment. She said, "Your hair looks nice." I said, "thank you." Then she said, "I bet you feel so much better now." I was like

 

[Janet']

Ipanema...Bwahahahahahaha

 

[Dellas]

That is why more than one person need to tell our story...

 

[mzteaze]

The comments are funny and sad at the same time. People don't know how to just compliment someone without it turning into a backhanded comment.

I liked the docu-comedy. Chris Rock is a comedian so you can expect some silly jokes. But, other parts of the documentary were interesting. Such as when they went to India and talked about how the hair is basically donated for FREE (to God)...but sold by the church/temple to hair companies.

 

[Ipanema]

Ipanema...Bwahahahahahaha

I don't understand what you mean with your post with the smilies at the end. I was wondering why she was even paying attention to my hair enough to make a comment.

 

[Guitarhero]

Please copy this thread, print it out and give it to him. He'll then comprehend.

 

[Guitarhero]

A non black woman apologized to me after seeing the movie erplexed she said she was unaware how much we have to go through just to style our hair

I would have told her..."shampoo, little conditioner, hairband...voila'" I hate stupid people.

 

[Janet']

I don't understand what you mean with your post with the smilies at the end. I was wondering why she was even paying attention to my hair enough to make a comment.

Ipanema Oh, no disrespect...it's like you want to smile and cry at the same time with that comment...These backhanded compliments KILL me!!!

 

[CurlyMoo]

I thought people forgot about this film.

I see Chris Rock miseducated a lot of races and opened the door to major disrespect and curiousity that wasn't really their business to begin with.

Now, I have to think of great comebacks as I wear my hair out for the summer. Don't have time for this foolishness, but I guess rude ignorant people deserve a wakeup call!

 

[CurlyMoo]

lol. thats nothing. right after the movie came out i was still rocking my braids. (i was still growing out my natural hair). and this particular hairstyle took up a lot of hair and i had it in a huge bun in the back of my head. i'm walking to my car and this white guy is walking behind me and goes, "wow, that's a lot of hair, it's nice." i say"thank you." before the words were even out of my mouth he asks "is it all yours?" i'm so taken aback i didn't even think to get offended right away. i kind of stammered "no." with a confused look on my face. i mean who asks that?! plus its BRAIDS! it's clearly not real. and he goes "i didn't think so." then he follows up with "i saw 'good hair' i know a lot of black women wear weaves."

i was then while he skipped away happily without a care in the world .

What the HELL?! What is wrong with this people? You were not obligated to answer his insult laced within a question. They were asking this years before the Chris Rock film, because the Black women they worked with were opening discussing it at work and Black comedians were making fun of it. But so many now have an excuse to ask and blame it on a Black person who pretty much gave them permission to be rude by broadcasting it to the entire world.

This is why I find it difficult to be attracted to American men, they are walking poosyes, catty bytches, and shyte starters. A real man would NEVER ask or insult a woman's femininity, especially a stranger or someone they barely speak to!!!! If you can't think of a clever comeback, IGNORE, IGNORE, IGNORE. Don't justify their behavior by causing a scene or acting equally ignorant, just treat them like the subjects of the Queen you are. And that's treating them like they aren't there at all.

 

[LongLeggedLife]

I guess i dont understand. With all of us having a paid membership to a site solely dedicated to hair care...which I wouldn't say the majority of the gen pop likely has, I dont mind people acknowledging that it takes time to have nice hair. Because it does!

With all the Dc+pre-poo+protein+henna+heat train+protective style for 2 years+oil rinse+ how to blend a lace wig+ 5year transition+V vs. U vs blunt ends+ fotki +photo docs of hair journey+a hair growth t-shirt+the umpteen other things that many of us actually do do....how is it offensive?

 

[Gin&Tonic]

Chris Rock's movie did some one-sided damage. I'd like to see a sequel where he tells the other side of the story, fat chance. I think this post re-iterates how we should be happy when we see Gabrielle Union, a famous person, rocking long natural hair and mentioning that it's not a weave. And Oprah. It should help get rid of negative stereotypes by Chris Rock by having more and more famous people let others know that they do have long hair.

I guess i dont understand. With all of us having a paid membership to a site solely dedicated to hair care...which I wouldn't say the majority of the gen pop likely has, I dont mind people acknowledging that it takes time to have nice hair. Because it does!

With all the Dc+pre-poo+protein+henna+heat train+protective style for 2 years+oil rinse+ how to blend a lace wig+ 5year transition+V vs. U vs blunt ends+ fotki +photo docs of hair journey+a hair growth t-shirt+the umpteen other things that many of us actually do do....how is it offensive?

Can't believe how you don't know. I work hard to keep my kitty tight too, but it is my personal bizness. Just because I discuss it on a thread here does not mean it means i want my personal stuff discussed on the street.

 

[sylver2]

The movie sucked. I hate, absolutely hate the term "creamy crack". Something about associating something that many black women do with a crack addiction is offensive to me. I sat in that theater as a woman who had been natural for 7 years & I was still offended. A lot of people seem to be ok with that term... Oh well

This post all the way!!! I absolutely hate the term "creamy crack" as well. I too dislike the association of Black women with crack. I also find the term extremely offensive to those with relaxers.

yup..i despise that term. with a passion

 

[jwhitley6]

I wouldn't have been offended by the Asian coworker but I would have let him know that it could be offensive to others, as some women are sensitive about their hair and hair care is a personal matter.

I'd accept the compliment. Healthy hair (for me) is a lot of work. I love my hair, but it is a labor of love to maintain it, keep it healthy and have it look nice to other people. I think if more people understood "that hair" they'd be more accepting of natural hair/natural hair styles. Unfortunately, Chris Rock didn't do the best job of educating them.

 

[Geminigirl]

I would have been like what hair? *blank stare*
I agree the that hair would have offended me to, I mean that hair? Wtdta? I am an other to them and sometimes I wonder why their is so thin and frizzy but I don't ask. I love red heads, most I have seen have thich shiny hair, I don't go up to them and tell them how beautiful teir hair is and ask why their blonde counterparts have dry looking fried hair. That's offensive my mom taoght me common sense. I don't get why we make excuses for others ignorance. This day and age if you want to know anything you could just google it.

 

[chicha]

I think the Asian guy meant to compliment you. Sounds like he wanted to "help" and acknowledge and just didn't know any better.

Now the white guy was being a pr!ck.

 

[Solitude]

I can't stand that movie (Good Hair), but anyone who forms an opinion based solely on a mockumentary by a comedian is a dummy.

 

[Solitude]

I guess i dont understand. With all of us having a paid membership to a site solely dedicated to hair care...which I wouldn't say the majority of the gen pop likely has, I dont mind people acknowledging that it takes time to have nice hair. Because it does!

With all the Dc+pre-poo+protein+henna+heat train+protective style for 2 years+oil rinse+ how to blend a lace wig+ 5year transition+V vs. U vs blunt ends+ fotki +photo docs of hair journey+a hair growth t-shirt+the umpteen other things that many of us actually do do....how is it offensive?

You don't really "need" any of the above to have nice hair.

It's offensive because the implication is that black people have hair that is difficult. The reality is that women of all races belong to hair care sites & are on youtube, and plenty of black women have nice and/or long hair without a forum membership or much effort at all.

 

[Rhetta]

WOW! Between that compliment and a paper cut. I'd take the paper cut! I've seen your YouTube btw, your hair is lovely!

 

[jennboo]

lol. thats nothing. right after the movie came out i was still rocking my braids. (i was still growing out my natural hair). and this particular hairstyle took up a lot of hair and i had it in a huge bun in the back of my head. i'm walking to my car and this white guy is walking behind me and goes, "wow, that's a lot of hair, it's nice." i say"thank you." before the words were even out of my mouth he asks "is it all yours?" i'm so taken aback i didn't even think to get offended right away. i kind of stammered "no." with a confused look on my face. i mean who asks that?! plus its BRAIDS! it's clearly not real. and he goes "i didn't think so." then he follows up with "i saw 'good hair' i know a lot of black women wear weaves."

i was then while he skipped away happily without a care in the world .

First, your BAA looks awesome in your siggy.

Second, dude was right though about it being fake hair, so why did you take offense? Because he called you out on it? Wasn't like he made a statement and assumed it was fake hair, he asked the question and it turned out to be true, LOL. And he is right, a lot of black women wear weaves. I don't see what all the offense is about.

 

[RegaLady]

You don't really "need" any of the above to have nice hair.

It's offensive because the implication is that black people have hair that is difficult. The reality is that women of all races belong to hair care sites & are on youtube, and plenty of black women have nice and/or long hair without a forum membership or much effort at all.

Yeah, but ask about 99% of the black population, and I am sure they will agree with him. This is not a brand new notion. Almost all people think our hair is difficult. Heck how many threads on this board seem to imply that.

He wasn't saying anything out of the norm. What seems to be embarassing is that our 'secret' seems to be out. At least thats what some women I went to see this movie with, seemed to imply.

 

[sweetlaughter]

First, your BAA looks awesome in your siggy.

Second, dude was right though about it being fake hair, so why did you take offense? Because he called you out on it? Wasn't like he made a statement and assumed it was fake hair, he asked the question and it turned out to be true, LOL. And he is right, a lot of black women wear weaves. I don't see what all the offense is about.

I am not OP but I can see where she is coming from. Consider this example:

Stranger: You look really good in that dress.
Woman: Thank you.
Stranger: Are you wearing spanx?
Woman: Actually I am. (Thinking: This is a weird ice breaker/ omg are they showing)
Stranger: I thought so. I just watched a special on PBS about obesity in Black America and how most Black women are so obese.

Now, would you be offended by this? Some things are best left unsaid.

 

[RegaLady]

I am not OP but I can see where she is coming from. Consider this example:

Stranger: You look really good in that dress.
Woman: Thank you.
Stranger: Are you wearing spanx?
Woman: Actually I am. (Thinking: This is a weird ice breaker/ omg are they showing)
Stranger: I thought so. I just watched a special on PBS about obesity in Black America and how most Black women are so obese.

Now, would you be offended by this? Some things are best left unsaid.

Actually the stranger would have said:
I saw a special on PBS about black women wearing spanx.

The stranger never indicated anything other than that. Take from what he said what you will, but he didn't mention anything else about our hair other than wearing of weaves.

 

[Oasis]

just because something isn't offensive doesn't mean it needs to be said. and he already knew it was weave so there was no reason for him to ask. if i know what braids she's talking about, no one, not even an ignorant white person would think it was her real hair.

i wish someone would ask me if i was wearing a push up bra or spanx.

 

[diadall]

He would have lost me at the "you're doing a good job with it," before he could get to the Chris Rock portion.

 

[runwaydream]

First, your BAA looks awesome in your siggy.

Second, dude was right though about it being fake hair, so why did you take offense? Because he called you out on it? Wasn't like he made a statement and assumed it was fake hair, he asked the question and it turned out to be true, LOL. And he is right, a lot of black women wear weaves. I don't see what all the offense is about.

yea he was right. but so what? he already knew he was before even asking. if he was wearing a toupee and i walked by him and asked him if it was a toupee and he said yes, and i said yea i figured bc most white men seem to bald prematurely would that be ok? i mean i was correct wasn't i. does that mean he has no right to be offended by my obvious lack of his feelings?

however, thanks for the compliment.

just because something isn't offensive doesn't mean it needs to be said. and he already knew it was weave so there was no reason for him to ask. if i know what braids she's talking about, no one, not even an ignorant white person would think it was her real hair.

i wish someone would ask me if i was wearing a push up bra or spanx.

exactly. people seem to have lost all of their tact sometime during this generation. i blame reality tv

 

[darlingdiva]

yea he was right. but so what? he already knew he was before even asking. if he was wearing a toupee and i walked by him and asked him if it was a toupee and he said yes, and i said yea i figured bc most white men seem to bald prematurely would that be ok? i mean i was correct wasn't i. does that mean he has no right to be offended my obvious lack of his feelings?

however, thanks for the compliment.




exactly. people seem to have lost all of their tact sometime during this generation. i blame reality tv

The bolded is precisely the reason that it's offensive. He already knew before he asked, so what was his reason for asking?

-To gloat in the fact that he was right?
-To let her know that he knew?
-To rub something in her face?

I could go on and on. The point is that his "inquiry" was offensive because of its intent. He did not ask the question to seek out an unknown; he asked the question to specifically highlight an element that is, at the least, uncomfortable for many Black women.

 

[RegaLady]

We know its an uncomfortable topic, but not everyone has the same feelings as we do. Sometimes people think changing our hairstyle is cool or facinating. So they comment. I am not excusing it, but they are not in our culture, so they really may not know how deep the hair thing goes with us.

 

[nikolite]

Actually the stranger would have said:
I saw a special on PBS about black women wearing spanx.

The stranger never indicated anything other than that. Take from what he said what you will, but he didn't mention anything else about our hair other than wearing of weaves.

But I think even if they said a lot of black women wear spanx, there's the same implication. She probably would have responded, why do you say that? and then it would've have eventually come to black women being obese.

I think people are mad Chris Rock aired our dirty laundry in public, and I don't blame them for it. Not because of the topic of the movie, but because he grossly misrepresented the extent to which weaves are being worn and how much black women pay for it. I actually was okay with the movie overall but really irritated by how much he stretched the truth to make it seem like it was this ubiquitous thing. I mean, of course black women in Hollywood wear it, so do white women in Hollywood, but he made it look like they represented all black women. I don't know one black women whose ever paid more $1000 or $5000 for a weave and was so obsessed for Indian remy she couldn't pay her rent.

Leading to random comments from strangers of other races to nearly any black women with nice looking hair--whether its fake or not--that it must took a lot of sacrifice or be fake. I'm natural and somewhat long hair and honestly didn't go through that much extra to get there. Plus, its just never necessary to say that you know someone's hair (or anything else) is fake or difficult to care for.

 

[jennboo]

Runwaydream and lizelies, i get your point's. I literally LOL'ed at the examples you gave. I concede, that would be rude for a stranger to verbalize, out of the blue.

This is likely beyond the scope of the current discussion, but I guess what i was getting at was the fact that lots of bw all of a sudden 'get offended' when people start noticing and then commenting on certain things. Like someone upthread pointed out, bw give fuel for this type of response form 'others'. How are you going to get mad or offended when whitey starts to notice that you are trying to get the same hair texture or skin color they have and that these endeavors have turned into multi-million dollar businesses, LOL.