coworkers & your hair

[Mena]

So, I moved to a new place where there aren't many black people. For those of you who live in types of areas, do people look at your hair strange? I go in between weaves and wearing my hair natural and I noticed some coworkers give me weird looks every time I change my hair. When I have lived in other areas with more diversity, the white people/coworkers never looked at me funny. So now, I am super self conscious. I hate being stared at.

 

[firecracker]

At least they only stare instead of making crazy or rude comments. One of my coworkers told me "I bet you can't even comb that, can you?" I was pissed but I gave his delusional crazy meds and hiv med taking arse a pass for that outburst. I do have some of that good nappy hair though

Oh by the way, he passed away two weeks ago.

 

[BlkOnyx488]

i live around lots of yt people. i am
amazed that they never change their hair. they might cut a few inches but that's it.

embrace your ability to be versatile and if they are staring well enjoy giving them lots of wonderful styles to stare at!!!

 

[Beverly Ann Properties]

Be you and just do you! At the end of the day, do they really matter? I think not! If they make a rude remark, just be classy with your comeback. Diversity is here to stay.

 

[discodumpling]

If you're going "back n forth" between a weave and your own hair often I WILL look at you with the side eye, simply out of curiosity

 

[prettybyrd]

discodumpling, I was going to mention that too. Most of the non-black people that I've worked with rarely ever changed their hairstyles. The men got the same cuts, the women wore the same styles. I think they are just curious about the changes. Despite all the media attention our hair is getting lately, most people know very little about our hair, and hair habits.

 

[aishasoleil]

Yes, I do notice I get a lot of looks and stares from people. But I rarely get a negative vibe from them. I can tell that it's genuine curiousity. Where I live, the black population is extremely (extreeeeeeemly) small. And I have yet to see another black woman with natural hair. So, I can understand why people (white OR black) would stare at me. I'm different from what they are used to seeing. *shrug* Besides, it may not be my hair they're staring at. I'm super thin so they could be staring at me thinking "Man, she needs to eat a sandwich or two." LOL! There are lots of reasons people stare. I don't even pay it any mind. I know it is easier said than done, but try not to feel self conscious! Just smile and KIM!

 

[SmilingElephant]

So, I moved to a new place where there aren't many black people. For those of you who live in types of areas, do people look at your hair strange? I go in between weaves and wearing my hair natural and I noticed some coworkers give me weird looks every time I change my hair. When I have lived in other areas with more diversity, the white people/coworkers never looked at me funny. So now, I am super self conscious. I hate being stared at.

I just moved from an area like this! They would stare at me/ look at me funny. But even as a child I had an issue w/ppl staring at me. I'm still working on myself..........but my mom taught me to simply give them a firm/friendly..."hi...how are you?"...with a smile.

They get startled or irritated and move along.

Ppl can be so rude.

 

[faithVA]

It gives you a great opportunity to increase your self confidence. Let them stare and then just put on your most wonderful smile, look them in the face and move on confidently. You will be amazed at how wonderful you feel. Confidence is attractive.

And I agree with the other posters. No telling why they are staring. But it is more than likely curiousity. When I changed my hair every few weeks I got a lot of comments. It never dawned on me that people rarely change their hair

 

[NikkiGirl]

I live in an area where there isn't much diversity shall we say. I will say people are curious about my hair, but I get so many compliments. They are always like, your hair is so big and pretty (when I leave my ponytail out and it is all big and fluffy) and when I wear it straight and down, they are all like "How does your hair grow so fast?" But most people here thought I was hispanic, so I had to correct them on that!

 

[Nefertiti0906]

My coworkers love it when I change my hairstyles. I go between my natural look, flat ironing my hair, and color. It's always a conversation piece and I don't mind. The only thing I don't like is when they touch my hair.

 

[NikkiQ]

My office building is 75% yt people and when it comes to hair...they see it all from all the rest of us in the building. My coworkers in my department are totally hip to the game when it comes to my hair. Even one of my boss's gets a kick out of whenever I have on a new wig or a new style with my natural hair and he says "you got new hair!!". The only problems I've had was from one black cop downstairs in the lobby who told me I needed to do something with it when he first saw my puff. This coming from a man with a flat top. So I kindly told him the next day "hey...you know that BS you told me yesterday totally ruined my morning. Of all the people that could've told me something, you just had to be the one huh? I don't give 2 sh@ts if you like my hair or not so keep your opinion to yourself unless I ask for it. Got it?" and I haven't had a problem out of anyone ever sense.

 

[Carrie A]

I don't live in this type of environment however most White folks, Asians keep the hair in the same cut once the cut is done then either grow it out or maintain. Frequent changing of texture and style appearance is a black thing. Our haiir is very versatile. Your can go from big bouncy roller set curls to spiral curls to bone straight to textured straight. Add to that the varied textures of natural hair, shrunken fro, blown out fr defined curl, stretched braid out, twists, braids, cornrows, up doos.......very short to long in 24 hours.......... you see how whats normal for us might turn their heads.

 

[choctaw]

I wore micro braids with sea shells tipped with myrhh beads over a simple black dress on a consulting assignment. A black VP (EOC guy) told me that corporate attire was mandatory. I wore a button down white oxford shirt, bow tie and matching suspenders the next day with blue pin stripe pants and Gucci lace ups. No more comments

I was a thrift store fiend in those days because I was not spending my pay check on "corporate attire"

P.S. the client was Itty Bitty Minds (IBM)

 

[FearlessNik]

Many of them simply just don't know. yt people can't go from relaxed to straight to color in 3 days. I had that happen and I actually broke it down to them. I explained how relaxers, braids, weaves, wigs, and coloring are used within the black community. After that no more side eyes. And a few of them actually asked me if I knew of anything they could use on their hair.

 

[Ogoma]

I wonder if I scare people. No one makes any comments to me at all. I have my response all planned out and nada.

 

[naturalmanenyc]

My hair has been the talk of the office for years. I work with mostly white people. I also changed my hair week to week (and sometimes day to day) for a while using wigs.

I've been in the same hairstyle since August (braid out) so the chatter is dying down.

 

[NuBraveHeart]

yep. i worked in engineering and in consulting projects in middle america. around 2009 i started changing up my hair at least every three months from natural styles, to weaves and onto wigs. it becomes a game for my non-pigmented brothas and sistas to guess when i'd have a new style. they were thrown off for a while at first, but after a while, they get to asking both dumb and intelligently curious questions. and they have always been complimentary. i suppose i'm approachable, which is why they said they are comfy just asking me.

the last stage is them asking how can they do different things with their hair. i tell chicks that are scared to get a short cut to buy a bobbed wig to test it out on the weekends. white girls ask me all the time now where can they get weaves done. i met a white girl from cali at a wedding once that was ALL ABOUT DA WEAVE. she said she spends about $300 a month on new pieces. her game is serious. she said her man stays confused, and constantly staring at her weaves and wigs in her apt. she TRIED to explain it to him, but gave up saying, "just be happy you get to screw a different girl every week." he liked that idea.

 

[Mena]

Thanks for the comments. I feel better! Just finished combing out the fro. Time for a new hairdo.