Bone Straight: To be or not to be?

[ajoyfuljoy]

I started using a very mild relaxer on my hair a little over a year ago (SE Mild). Before that I was using Soft and Beautiful. I have 4a very course hair that makes tiny coils the size of pensprings.

Well, now that I have about 6 inches of underprocessed hair on my head, I must say that I am really frustrated! I have fallen out of love with my hair. The straighter part looks crazy in comparison with the underprocessed hair.

I have a large forehead and when I pull my hair back, to me it looks funny with all the poofiness at the scalp.

I no longer enjoy wearing my hair out. I rarely wear it out and when I do it makes me unhappy. I think I have worn it out maybe three times this year? I tried to rollerset it yesterday and it was looking crazy to me. With my straighter hair, I could rollerset at 10 weeks post and not even have to be bothered with flat ironing/blowing out my roots. In fact, my favorite rollerset pic was taken at 10 weeks post.

I am 11 weeks post now and I looked like I was transitioning for 6 months yesterday. I flat ironed on 400 and my hair is still poofy at the scalp. With straighter hair, I could get my roots straight under 300 degrees. My hair is course yall! lol

I know that texlaxed hair is healthier, but after doing this for about a year, I don't like it anymore. I am thinking about going back to Soft and Beautiful. Even though it burned sometimes :-( I got a more consistent straight texture out of my hair, my hair was ten times easier to do and I just liked it more.

What say you?

 

[Kellum]

I say do what makes you happy so that you enjoy your hair.

 

[Junebug D]

I never had a good experience with underprocessed hair either. I know some people consider it to be the best of both worlds, but I consider it the worst of both worlds.

 

[MsMwana]

Sounds like you've already made up your mind...

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

I never had a good experience with underprocessed hair either. I know some people consider it to be the best of both worlds, but I consider it the worst of both worlds.

I am starting to think this maybe true only if you have curly hair. I think if your hair has less defined curls, then you might as well just be straight or natural. I'm finally realizing that the in-between has sucked for me.


I am getting married in August and I wanted to do my own hair. I think that is when I had the epiphany last night. I was like , I'm not going to be looking a hot mess on my wedding pics lol.

I NEVER had any problems with my straighter hair. Any style I did myself looked amazing. It looked like I went to the shop. Now? It has to be a fresh texlax or a braidout for my hair to look good.

And also, it feels dry to me. It's like it sucks up more moisture or something and it rarely looks shiny anymore. *sigh*

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

Sounds like you've already made up your mind...

lol maybe so.

 

[Adaoba2012]

I know for me it was one or the other..bone straight or fully natural. I feel like if you are going to texlax you should just transition. Do whatever makes you happy because at the end of the day its your head

 

[Guitarhero]

I know that texlaxed hair is healthier, but after doing this for about a year, I don't like it anymore. I am thinking about going back to Soft and Beautiful. Even though it burned sometimes :-( I got a more consistent straight texture out of my hair, my hair was ten times easier to do and I just liked it more.

What say you?

You just need to do what is better for you regarding comfort and styling options. Being frustrated daily with hair and feeling stuck without style is too stressful. If it's easier to relax, then do so. Sounds like you want styling options that aren't easily manageable with natural 4a hair. It also sounds like you want to hold onto your length. You could relaxer treat with your Soft n Beautiful and leave it on for less time but closer to bone straight rather than true texlax and see how you like that for transitioning. Further on, you could true texlax and eventually wean yourself off relaxers, if that is what you're trying to do. Or you could get a Brazilian Keratin Treatment that will wear off in 3-4 months while you're accumulating new growth length.

 

[Minty]

I used to use Gentle Treatment no-lye. I got good results (my natural texture is pin curl puff as well) It was excellent. I could even do wash n go with it and I could get a nice loose wavy texture out of it.

Vitale no-lye gave results close to this

Linange lye texturizer - Left me with puff and no curl def.

I understand what you are dealing with. No fun.

Are you self-relaxing? I would wait a while, protein DC well, clarify a week later, and on the third week you could do a corrective.

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

You just need to do what is better for you regarding comfort and styling options. Being frustrated daily with hair and feeling stuck without style is too stressful. If it's easier to relax, then do so. Sounds like you want styling options that aren't easily manageable with natural 4a hair. It also sounds like you want to hold onto your length. You could relaxer treat with your Soft n Beautiful and leave it on for less time but closer to bone straight rather than true texlax and see how you like that for transitioning. Further on, you could true texlax and eventually wean yourself off relaxers, if that is what you're trying to do. Or you could get a Brazilian Keratin Treatment that will wear off in 3-4 months while you're accumulating new growth length.

I have thought about transitioning for a long time and attempted it a couple of times. But I enjoy straight styles a lot and my hair takes a huge amount of effort to get straight. It is mega frustrating to me. Plus, I've never been that great at flat ironing. Rollersetting is my bread and butter and very difficult to get a good set on texlaxed course 4a/b hair. I rarely see my type reflected on this board. I just can't deal with it.

I think straight is for me.

 

[Eluv]

I think Bone straight is better if you want prefer wearing your hair straight.

My daughter and I are both texlaxed. I love it, but I only wear my hair up anyway.

My daughter wants her hair flat ironed every two weeks so she can wear it down daily, so IMHO she really needs bone straight hair so that bi-weekly flat ironing could be eliminated.

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

I used to use Gentle Treatment no-lye. I got good results (my natural texture is pin curl puff as well) It was excellent. I could even do wash n go with it and I could get a nice loose wavy texture out of it.

Vitale no-lye gave results close to this

Linange lye texturizer - Left me with puff and no curl def.

I understand what you are dealing with. No fun.

Are you self-relaxing? I would wait a while, protein DC well, clarify a week later, and on the third week you could do a corrective.

I'm 11 weeks post so I think I may just go back to Soft and Beautiful and pull it through to the hair that is underprocessed. Thank you for trying to help me come up with a plan.

 

[sqzbly1908]

I tried this tex-lax thing as well and it definitely not for me...I am on the flipside of the spectrum as I have very fine hair and that new growth plus the texlax is not a good combination...gotta go with the bone straight or very close to it...

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

I think Bone straight is better if you want prefer wearing your hair straight.

My daughter and I are both texlaxed. I love it, but I only wear my hair up anyway.

My daughter wants her hair flat ironed every two weeks so she can wear it down daily, so IMHO she really needs bone straight hair so that bi-weekly flat ironing could be eliminated.

Yes it makes so much sense. When I was bone straight I barely used heat b/c I didn't need it. The light tension from a rollerset got me straight and silky. But now, I just don't know what my hair needs or wants. It's like it's foreign to me.

It makes me want to just cut it all off out of frustration even though it isn't damaged lol.

 

[imaccami]

If it ain't broke, don't fix it. It sounds like things were going along fine when you were relaxed, I would go back to that.

I know how you feel. I just stretched for the first time and it was a nightmare. I'm never doing it again. Puffy hair, detangling took forever, styling took forever, breakage city, I had to turn up my flat iron, ugh it was awful. I say go back to what you know, that's what I'm going to do. I got good results before so I'm going to stick with it.

 

[urbanchic]

Did you use any type of serum before you flat ironed? Chi Silk works wonders regardless of where I am in my stretch.

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

Did you use any type of serum before you flat ironed? Chi Silk works wonders regardless of where I am in my stretch.

Chi Silk does nothing for me.

 

[ceebee3]

It would annoy me to be in between. I was never really bone straight but my hair always got straight enough to never have to use heat.

I would just go back to how you had your hair before.

 

[MonPetite]

It depends on your needs.

If you like straight hair and have hair that demands frequent washes and deep conditioning treatments, is it worth using high heat often, when relaxing could eliminate the need for heat tools all together?

When I was bone-laxed, life was rather simple. A scarf at night on damp hair gave flat-ironed results. I wash daily whether relaxed or natural (which I am now) and used a moisturizer daily. I could even cut out DCs and just stick to natural leave-ins and occasional protein treatments.

Not so with my natural hair. It takes hours out of my week, without the assurance of perfect hair days. My texlaxed hair was much the same.

If I ever relax again, I will bonelax. I'm wearing it straight for the moment and I'm starting to see that constant flat-ironing, even with great technique and products could be my long term undoing. Even though my hair can take permanent color and a super relaxer and still be soft and shiny.

Heat is no joke!

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

It depends on your needs.

If you like straight hair and have hair that demands frequent washes and deep conditioning treatments, is it worth using high heat often, when relaxing could eliminate the need for heat tools all together?

When I was bone-laxed, life was rather simple. A scarf at night on damp hair gave flat-ironed results. I wash daily whether relaxed or natural (which I am now) and used a moisturizer daily. I could even cut out DCs and just stick to natural leave-ins and occasional protein treatments.

Not so with my natural hair. It takes hours out of my week, without the assurance of perfect hair days. My texlaxed hair was much the same.

If I ever relax again, I will bonelax. I'm wearing it straight for the moment and I'm starting to see that constant flat-ironing, even with great technique and products could be my long term undoing. Even though my hair can take permanent color and a super relaxer and still be soft and shiny.

Heat is no joke!

LittleGoldLamb we have a lot in common! Whenever I use a lot of heat, my hair reacts drastically. Although I have experienced scalp burns from relaxers (ouch!), with care those are minimized (this happened a lot when others did my relaxers but not so much when I do my own), but I have never, ever had damaged hair from relaxers and I have been doing my own for at least 3 years now.

What causes me damage is heat and lack of moisture/protein. As long as I DC, do protein treatments and minimize heat, my hair is happy.

 

[Vashti]

Well you've got to do what will make you feel beautiful and happy and what's best for your hair. if bone straight relaxing is what makes your hair look good and you know how to keep it healthy while relaxed i see no reason why you shouldn't relax it.

 

[HairBella08]

I'm realizing that texlaxing is not working for me for some of the same reasons you mentioned. It seems like I have to manipulate my hair too much to get it straight - doing more harm than good.

A little off topic...I'm curious about your experience because I have coarse 4b hair as well and I plan to move from texlaxing to relaxing with SE mild lye. Did you leave the mild on the recommended time or were you purposely texlaxing? I'm trying to decide between the mild and regular formulas.

 

[vainღ♥♡jane]

when i used to get my hair relaxed, i preferred it bone straight. i don't like to be inbetween. ♥

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

I'm realizing that texlaxing is not working for me for some of the same reasons you mentioned. It seems like I have to manipulate my hair too much to get it straight - doing more harm than good.

A little off topic...I'm curious about your experience because I have coarse 4b hair as well and I plan to move from texlaxing to relaxing with SE mild lye. Did you leave the mild on the recommended time or were you purposely texlaxing? I'm trying to decide between the mild and regular formulas.

I left it on for the maximum time. After a couple of applications it became very difficult for me to tell the difference between my wet NG and my SE mild treated hair. It's only slightly more manageable and doesn't shrink up as much. I think you should probably go for the regular.

 

[Britt]

This may be a very unpopular opinion, but I honestly thinking textlaxing is best left for those who have somewhat of a looser wave or curl pattern. I totally understand your post and that is the reason why I relax fairly straight. You can be bone straight w/o having your hair stuck to your head and lifelessly overprocessed.

A bit OT but relates to the above, all of my life, I've had mostly 3c hair texture and when I joined the board I started to relax w/ a lye relaxer which would definetely leave me w/ a curl pattern still. For some reason a few years ago, my hair texture changed to that of a coarser 4a (reason why I can relate to your post) and I realize that my hair doesn't behave the same anymore, I need to use a no-lye relaxer that's gentle on my scalp and gets my hair fairly straight b/c I no longer have the waves/curls I use to. If I use a lye relaxer and texlax my hair instead it will look frizzyish in some areas, a very different look than when my hair was wavier and I'd texlax it. Attached is a pic from a few yrs ago of my underprocessed hair. There is no way I could texlax my hair now and it look the same. I don't think bone straight hair is the devil and I really do think that hair types need to be treated accordingly, JMHO. I somewhat feel it's a sin to say that on this board.

 

[Britt]

Linange lye texturizer - Left me with puff and no curl def.

I understand what you are dealing with. No fun.

This is exactly why I don't think textlaxing is best for all hair textures. The kinkier and coarser your hair the more of a puff effect it will have and not the textlaxed effect you prob had in mind. I say do what you feel is best for your hair, sometimes what everyone is doing on the board may not work best for your hair. HTH !

 

[MizzCoco]

I agree with ^^ about different textures not being as successful with texlaxing sometimes. I have two textures on my head, much coarser and dense hair in my crown, and a looser texture around the sides, so I texlax that part, and bone straight relax in my crown. I was having too many issues with breakage and tangling when I tried to only texlax the crown. Sounds like you may have to stick to what was working for you in the past.

 

[Britt]

I agree with ^^ about different textures not being as successful with texlaxing sometimes. I have two textures on my head, much coarser and dense hair in my crown, and a looser texture around the sides, so I texlax that part, and bone straight relax in my crown. I was having too many issues with breakage and tangling when I tried to only texlax the crown. Sounds like you may have to stick to what was working for you in the past.

Yep, the coarser areas of my hair would never be able to be texlaxed. It would just turn frizzy.

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

Yep, the coarser areas of my hair would never be able to be texlaxed. It would just turn frizzy.

Thank you! Now you know what the top 6 inches of my hair looks and acts like It's frizzy, kinky and dry. Because it was thicker, I was thinking that it was healthier. But I have come to the conclusion that it isn't healthier for me.

 

[NIN4eva]

I am starting to think this maybe true only if you have curly hair. I think if your hair has less defined curls, then you might as well just be straight or natural. I'm finally realizing that the in-between has sucked for me.

I am getting married in August and I wanted to do my own hair. I think that is when I had the epiphany last night. I was like , I'm not going to be looking a hot mess on my wedding pics lol.

I NEVER had any problems with my straighter hair. Any style I did myself looked amazing. It looked like I went to the shop. Now? It has to be a fresh texlax or a braidout for my hair to look good.

And also, it feels dry to me. It's like it sucks up more moisture or something and it rarely looks shiny anymore. *sigh*

I agree with you on the bolded OP. I think we have the same hair type and those teeny tiny coils are no joke.