This girl was making me sound like a whore because if I meet a guy I like and he ask for my number I give it to him. I feel really bad now. Is this not the standard. I think I have given out my number 2 or 3 times this year. She says you are suppose to be friends before you pass out your number. I am confused, please assist
Am I not suppose to give out my number?
- Thread starter chickle
- Start date
song_of_serenity
Well-Known Member
I honestly think people are so caught up on this rules business it's getting ridiculous. While I don't give USUALLY out MY number personally, it's not because of some rules, it's because I don't want some person I JUST met ringing me if he has psychotic tendencies. 
(saw it happen to a friend, the guy would cal her all hour on the hour, they met at a club and didn't even speak beyond 15 minutes!!) Plus guys mostly slip theirs.
If you felt comfortable giving your number, then you did. Your business. The ball is now in his court to pursue, you know, if he wants to contact you, he'll call. :/ I don't see what's so "whorish" about that at all.
(saw it happen to a friend, the guy would cal her all hour on the hour, they met at a club and didn't even speak beyond 15 minutes!!) Plus guys mostly slip theirs. If you felt comfortable giving your number, then you did. Your business. The ball is now in his court to pursue, you know, if he wants to contact you, he'll call. :/ I don't see what's so "whorish" about that at all.
MiamiHottie
Well-Known Member
song_of_serenity
Well-Known Member
To become friends you have to meet and then communicate.
If you give your number out, I bet she'll give that excuse.
If you take his, then she'll probably say "NO, men should do the chasing"
So how is this 'being friends" supposed to happen then?
If you give your number out, I bet she'll give that excuse.
If you take his, then she'll probably say "NO, men should do the chasing"
So how is this 'being friends" supposed to happen then?
Thank you ladies! This girl had be thinking I was loose or something. I am a freshman at a big college and she is a senior, so I sort of look to her for guidance. She was telling me it was the first step to me being a whore and I was being really easy.
She did outwardly complain about why guys didn't approach her and she asked me what I usually wear. She has been really condescending lately. She picks at every single word I say. I usually try to ignore it, but it is starting to get out of hand.
I was dancing to this song on the bus and she said I was acting loose.
She did outwardly complain about why guys didn't approach her and she asked me what I usually wear. She has been really condescending lately. She picks at every single word I say. I usually try to ignore it, but it is starting to get out of hand.
I was dancing to this song on the bus and she said I was acting loose.
song_of_serenity
Well-Known Member
Well, there you go. She's not looking out for you as a big sister, she's pretty much picky and jealous.
You say she's been condescending "lately." Her comments focus on you and men etc...any possibility someone SHE may be interested in has expressed a desire for you?
You say she's been condescending "lately." Her comments focus on you and men etc...any possibility someone SHE may be interested in has expressed a desire for you?
VioletWylde
Well-Known Member
Read: You are new and the guys are tired of looking at her.
Ok really--she is stretching. Three guys over the course of a year is not that many. You only gave out your number, not your room key.
As a freshman, everyone wants you. In this moment, you are a fresh face, a potential new member and a favorable statistic. When you hit that 3rd and 4th year, people just aren't checking for you anymore. They've seen you everyday for a couple of years at least and they are sick of your face, your voice and your perspective.
Don't mind her and let her go if you need to. Make sure that you strike a balance that works for you and be mindful of your surroundings/campus & organizational politics to avoid drama.
afrikurl
Active Member
It sounds like her attitude is the reason no one talks to her. If she is helpful to you in other ways then keep her around but she sounds like a negative nancy so I would take her commentsabout your behavior with a grain of salt. You are considered Fresh-meat to the older gentlemen on campus but your response to their attention will determined how you are percieved. You can ask her what she knows about an individual, use that to help you decide but don't let her try to tell you what to do.
naturalmanenyc
Well-Known Member
I'm confused. How do you become friends with a man if you cannot speak to him over the phone, with him using your number to call? Telepathy? Carrier pidgeon? Or maybe wait to bump into on campus? Stalk him?
She sounds silly.
She sounds silly.
I wish I could drop her, but I can't I have been there for her when 3 of her other friends dropped her and she was so nasty. I used to confide in her so I know if I drop her she will go around telling everyone my secrets, like with a couple of the girls. She is still plotting how to get one girl back, even though the girl stop talking to her over 4 months ago.
A mutual friend of ours confessed to her that he was interested in me, but he has a girlfriend who we are both acquainted with. I have completely distanced myself from this guy and have stopped responding to him, but I still get the slack for it, even though she has been there every time I encounter this guy, and she was the one flirting. I think she has a crush on him, so maybe this is where it is from.
A mutual friend of ours confessed to her that he was interested in me, but he has a girlfriend who we are both acquainted with. I have completely distanced myself from this guy and have stopped responding to him, but I still get the slack for it, even though she has been there every time I encounter this guy, and she was the one flirting. I think she has a crush on him, so maybe this is where it is from.
Last edited:
BroadstreetBully
New Member
Yikes! Not a good situation to be in. I'd watch out for her. You're fine. If you're concerned at all you can try getting a google account number.
hopeful
Well-Known Member
Okay then don't drop her. She's about to graduate anyway so just don't tell her anymore secrets and don't pay her no attention. Just be like ooh girl is that what you think? Oh yes I understand, I know what you mean
, while really thinking 
and 
. After she graduates you should be able to drop her, right?
, while really thinking and . After she graduates you should be able to drop her, right?
VioletWylde
Well-Known Member
There it is! Oh, and I fixed that last one for you.
Ok, so you're in a potentially poisonous situation with this chick. Don't show fear--that's the worse thing you can do with a predatory animal. DO NOT TELL HER ANYTHING ELSE and stop dancing on the bus. She will be looking for anything she can use against you. Keep the distance with the mutual friend. Don't even acknowledge his existence because no good can come of it. Eventually your friend will want to use you to drive a wedge between this other girl and male friend. She has probably already told some other folks you are a loose freshman.
This way, anybody interested will be so focused on you that they won't notice her scooting up to him saying "Oh poor male friend, I've got your back. I TOLD you Chickle was loose. It's all her fault. Now girlfriend hates you and you're all alone, but you still have me." It's too late to run so just play dead. Be aware and if she invites male friend along, excuse yourself to go somewhere lots of other people you know will be. How long until she graduates?
Last edited:
Okay then don't drop her. She's about to graduate anyway so just don't tell her anymore secrets and don't pay her no attention. Just be like ooh girl is that what you think? Oh yes I understand, I know what you mean
I know, I should have already started doing this, lol. I have to remember to keep my mouth shut around her, but sometimes I am so focused on being nonjudgmental and open minded about others views. I do realize that sometimes I will have judge people (in terms of whether I will be their friend or not), especially if they are making my life toxic and bringing no good to it.
There it is! Oh, and I fixed that last one for you.
Ok, so you're in a potentially poisonous situation with this chick. Don't show fear--that's the worse thing you can do with a predatory animal. DO NOT TELL HER ANYTHING ELSE and stop dancing on the bus. She will be looking for anything she can use against you. Keep the distance with the mutual friend. Don't even acknowledge his existence because no good can come of it. Eventually your friend will want to use you to drive a wedge between this other girl and male friend. She has probably already told some other folks you are a loose freshman.
This way, anybody interested will be so focused on you that they won't notice her scooting up to him saying "Oh poor male friend, I've got your back. I TOLD you Chickle was loose. It's all her fault. Now girlfriend hates you and you're all alone, but you still have me." It's too late to run so just play dead. Be aware and if she invites male friend along, excuse yourself to go somewhere lots of other people you know will be. How long until she graduates?
The scary thing is this scenario is very possible. It is sad because I am the total opposite of loose, I have never slept with anyone in my life. When I do dance it is usually silly looking and for fun (imagine the Carlton, lol). I normally don't even have guys on my radar, because it can lead to drama and I don't need that. I really don't want my reputation to be tarnished or anything. I have a feeling that she told one of her friends something about me because the friend is always looking at me with guarded eyes, like I am trying to steal her man.
This brings forth another issue. I officially do not want any guy friends who have girlfriends.
I know that she is going to be here next year because she was asking me to be her roommate.
phynestone
Well-Known Member
Do NOT agree to become her roommate! That is a DANGEROUS situation. Not potentially, it is a dangerous situation!!!!
Be polite and cordial, but protect yourself. Maintain your distance and if she asks if something is up, just say you're busy or that you have to go. She wants to be your roommate so she can learn more about you and possibly control. She's actually trying to do that now by her actions, but there may come a time when you have to put your foot down and let her know what's up. Just be prepared. I've had to do it and those people fell off or got with the program.
Now that you know what kind of individual she is, don't confide in her (it doesn't matter that you don't want to be judged, you need to protect yourself), maintain your distance and keep it moving!
I'm saying this because I dealt with women like this in college and in the workplace.
Be polite and cordial, but protect yourself. Maintain your distance and if she asks if something is up, just say you're busy or that you have to go. She wants to be your roommate so she can learn more about you and possibly control. She's actually trying to do that now by her actions, but there may come a time when you have to put your foot down and let her know what's up. Just be prepared. I've had to do it and those people fell off or got with the program.
Now that you know what kind of individual she is, don't confide in her (it doesn't matter that you don't want to be judged, you need to protect yourself), maintain your distance and keep it moving!
I'm saying this because I dealt with women like this in college and in the workplace.
Livingmylifetothefullest
Well-Known Member
You need to stay away from this chick. Sounds to me that she's jealous of you.
Thanks. I am definitely not rooming with her b/c I already had a roommate for next year before she asked.
I'm just going to continue acting normal, but I am not going to confide in her. She is smart enough to when someone is avoiding her, and I do not want to raise any alarms.
I don't want to give the impression that she is a cold, calculating person, because she is not. She just has this weird Jekyll and Hyde complex.
I'm just going to continue acting normal, but I am not going to confide in her. She is smart enough to when someone is avoiding her, and I do not want to raise any alarms.
I don't want to give the impression that she is a cold, calculating person, because she is not. She just has this weird Jekyll and Hyde complex.
SexySin985
Well-Known Member
Is this a senior in COLLEGE acting and behaving like a senior in High School???
OP, do what you want when you want how you want! If you saw no problem with giving out your number then she should be fine with it. Geez, you gave him your number and she acting like you gave him your nookieerplexed
"That's the first step to being a whore." So she knows the order of Whoredom as if she's the expert
OP, do what you want when you want how you want! If you saw no problem with giving out your number then she should be fine with it. Geez, you gave him your number and she acting like you gave him your nookie
erplexed"That's the first step to being a whore." So she knows the order of Whoredom as if she's the expert
brownelovely
Well-Known Member
It's fine to give out your number so long as you are comfortable with giving it to the person. I can understand the concern since you are a freshman but I'm sure you have been warned about guys that target the "fresh meat" on campus.
There is nothing wrong with giving out your number....giving out your goodies is a different story. You can't get to know someone if you can't communicate with them.
Oh, and she sounds bitter.
There is nothing wrong with giving out your number....giving out your goodies is a different story. You can't get to know someone if you can't communicate with them.
Oh, and she sounds bitter.
VioletWylde
Well-Known Member
Um... SCARY. Those are the most dangerous. Give me a plain old monster any day--at least I know their intentions from jump.
Be careful. I know that the social scene in college can be very turbulent. Make sure that everyone knows that school is your top priority (even if it isn't). The best way that I found to avoid drama was to be a book worm. You don't have time to be loose if you're making the Dean's List (not always true, but people have trouble reconciling the two things mentally, so it helps).
I'm glad you already had a roommate picked. Does she know who it is? Keep tabs on that. You don't want your roommate to end up in the middle. Manipulative people can be very nice when they want to be. It's after they get you sucked in that the crazy starts to show.
Yeah, she sort of knows my roommate. She has complained about her and insulted her because the girl got offended at something she said.
Thanks! I do make it clear to the guys I meet that I am not into random hookups and that I am here to graduate. I have taken interest in one particular guy, but I may have to let him go because I am not sure his intentions in getting to know me are completely pure, but he is a really nice person.
LifeafterLHCF
New Member
OK a unpopular thought..I get where you senior friend is thinking..I don't like her method but I see her motives..she alot like me..but I don't give a blank once we have chatted about what some men can be like you are ultimately responsible for you..have fun..mingle but be watchful..but she seems a bit controlling possible been hurt...
ArrrBeee
Well-Known Member
She really doesn't sound like a friend at all. The best thing that you can do is walk away from her. Whatever you told (shared) with her, if it comes back up, just deny it. She probably thinks that she can hold this over your head.
You say you look to her for guidance. What kind of guidance could she possibly give you by trashing your character?
The following reasons reiterate why she should have no part of your life.
a) three of her friends dropped her (people don't just drop you for no reason)
b) she is condescending and picks at what you say
c) she is plotting revenge against a former friend
d) talking badly about your future roommate
e) Jekyll and Hyde complex
You say you look to her for guidance. What kind of guidance could she possibly give you by trashing your character?
The following reasons reiterate why she should have no part of your life.
a) three of her friends dropped her (people don't just drop you for no reason)
b) she is condescending and picks at what you say
c) she is plotting revenge against a former friend
d) talking badly about your future roommate
e) Jekyll and Hyde complex
Similar threads
