Advice desperately needed: How do you break his heart?

[Serenity_Peace]

REPUBLICAN?????? RUN GIRL!! RUN FO YO LIFE!!!! RUN FO DA HILLS!!!!

Honestly, I am a political scientist by trade, and it's very difficult to have political discussions with him. It bothers me that he idolizes Reagan, seeing as though I believe that Reagan was the biggest racist. But, I am trying and I think that he may be coming around. He's one of those Libertarian Repugs, which I'm not sure is that much better, but tends to be socially moderate on a lot of issues. He's certainly not a Neocon or a Right Wing Religious Zealot, which I guess I can deal with. And, at least he was open to seeing "An Inconvenient Truth" with me and wants to go see Mike Moore's movie with me. But in the back of my head, I think he's just trying to pacify me. He still gets his talking points from Sean "Insanity" and Rush "Limpballs."

 

[Serenity_Peace]

Confession time.... I actually dated a guy that voted for Bush in the last election. It was downhill from there.

LAWD....STOP THE PRESSES!! I think I just had a heart attack!!

 

[Chocogurl1der]

Bring forth your inner Bytch. It's the only way. Last year I dated this guy for 3 months because I was too nice to break it off. I tried let him down easy too. I didn't make it personal . I told him didn't have the time to dedicate to a relationship. It was true in a way, I was working 60-68 hrs a week. I could have cut back if I wanted to, but he didn't know that. I pleaded with him to date other people. He refused. He told me he would wait until I did have time for him. For 3 months he called and emailed me constantly. I'm glad he never knew where I lived. We lived about 2 hours from each other, so we would me up in the middle at my job. Thank God, I worked at a law enforcement agency. Having guys around with guns was a good deterrent . Anyhoo I had to be mean...and tell him to leave me alone..period

 

[Chocogurl1der]

Oh, he was 43, too, when we were together. Weird.

 

[toniy]

Be happy. You have one life to live and still young...

At some point you have to realize that to much talk is just that - TALK. He is not being fair to you and vice -versa. It seems that he is holding on to that one hope of being near and doing favors to pull you on in.

His behavior sends up RED flags. Any time someone calls and demands to know why you havent called back...WOW. What is it about your behavior that makes him feel comfortable enough to question you like that when you have made it clear that you all are only friends.

JMO -Pay him back all of the money ASAP. Dont go to OC - he is too persistent about this - RED FlAG. Minimize communication to a point where he cant expect anything and put the ball back into your court.

Good luck...LOA

 

[gn1g]

Keep it movin, you can't help how you feel if there is no chemistry on your end there is no deal. So what you owe him, mail him the money and cut him off. I assure you he knows that "You are just not that into him".

 

[yourleoqueen]

JMO -Pay him back all of the money ASAP. Good luck...LOA

Wait, you owe him money? Okay I didn't see that part. Uhm, yeah after you pay him back, you won't feel nearly as guilt ridden or apprehensive about ditching him.

 

[Serenity_Peace]

Wait, you owe him money? Okay I didn't see that part. Uhm, yeah after you pay him back, you won't feel nearly as guilt ridden or apprehensive about ditching him.

Yep! And that's what I think he is holding over me. He knows that I don't want him, but me owing him money guarantees that I'll be in his life. And there is a lot of guilt involved because honestly if he didn't lend me that money I would have found a way out of this mess a long time ago. I think he knows this, too. He tells me to pay it back in very small increments. And I'm thinking to myself: Naw, player...I'm paying you back in very large increments until I pay you off in full so you can't hold me captive. I've kept all of my cashier check receipts, too, so he can't come back and say that I owe him more. I ain't that stupid. I watch Judge Mathis!

He insisted that I take the money because I was in a very desperate spot at the time. But now I make a fair amount of money that I can pay him back in larger increments and be done with it by the end of the summer. I can't wait, either!

Oh, and when we go out, I started to demand that I pay for my half. He offers to buy me clothes, shoes, movies and plays, has asked that we do some traveling in Europe together. No matter how tempted I am, I refuse to accept anything else from him. He feels bad, but whenever he asks me why I won't accept, I tell him that I don't want to give him the false impression that we are in a relationship.

As for Ocean City, I have declined every time. In fact, he asked me again just last night. He keeps asking me over and over again. And I'm like: Damn man, you ain't got no other friends to go with? Why you pressin' me hard to go with you?