4b's rejoice!! Now you TOO can get curl definition like the rest!! YAY!

song_of_serenity

song_of_serenity

Well-Known Member
Total sarcasm on my part in the title. :/

So I had to find this lady due to a natural acquaintance of mine (one of those soul sistah, mother earthy, not so fond of white people, all black people who get relaxers are devil mind infested types who's soon to not even be that) and saw the lady put up a new video.

Is having a lil curl THAT important that you have to shlack your hair with gel and brush for 5 minutes and then take about THREE to FOUR HOURS just for some curl definition??

REALLY?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0NU8gpBK4c

It's like...that's the only thing she dedicates her videos to.

DON'T GET ME WRONG.

It's not even the fact that she does this (heck, I rake some gel through my hair sometimes) and takes so long on it (I'm still floored, five hours?) It's the way she constantly speaks disdainfully of her own texture in all her videos that's just kind of sad. Like in one video "I went from dull, kinky, nappy bushy, cottony hair to to these gorgeous, spirally, shiny curls" and "There's something you can do with this type of hair to get these pretty curls. You can get definition, thank God!"

I know we all want to switch things up and all. And I know a few natural folk are quick to call relaxed heads "SELF HATERS" because they wear their hair straight. But unless you see someone with relaxed hair take on the "Oooh, my hair was so ugly and nappy, but ooh wee, look how lush and soft and bouncy, I got that white girl flow nah!" mindset, it's just a way to wear their hair. And you have just as many "self hating" naturals as people claim relaxed people can be.

Oh, and said acquaintance said of the lady "Well, at least she still loves curly hair. Black folks can have curly hair. But straight hair? No, something is just wrong *cue rant on brainwashing*" She doesn't even see that not embracing what you have, even as a natural is just as bad as running to get a relaxer at the sign of one kink just because it's "kinky, bushy and just nappy"

I digress. :/
 
What's crazy about it is, she spends like, 4 minutes talking about how she feels about her hair, not how she actually achieved the style. 'Ooooh, I'm not one of those 3c/ 4a girls that can get out the shower with curls, I have to work for it' :blah:

:rolleyes:
 
I've seen this lady before. In order to not turn this thread into a totally asinine exchange I'll keep it short. I really do agree with you. The incessant need to prove that her hair isn't as "dull, kinky, nappy and bushy" as it appears by using that raggedy brush and tub of gel comes from the same place as the need to straighten it all to hell.

IIRC, there was another one of her videos where the viewers were calling her a poser because in it's natural, no-product state she does not have what appears to be 4b hair.
 
^ since then, no matter how many people have posted about "Great technique, but learn to love your hair" nothing has changed it seems.

You can straighten your hair and wear weaves (*cough* nice ones) down your back and use gel all you want. But the reasoning behind it is what matters.

It's just so weird, when I was relaxed (as the majority of the girls around were), I was used to the girls going to get a touch up every 4 weeks at the sign of a wave or kink, heck, if I stretched too long, the dominican hair dresser looked like she wanted to beat me with her comb and went on about "So beaauuutifa nough, Mami" when it was "done. And forget about the attention we'd get from the guys with our hair freshly blown out, like you were a movie star!

kmn1980 said:
because in it's natural, no-product state she does not have what appears to be 4b hair.
Click to expand...
No, she's a 4b.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4mf-nwn9lE&feature=channel

I guess I can give her props for showing her actual texture (even though she downs it) vs some people who do braid outs and get texlaxed and swear this is how they were "born"


A lot of that was internalized from a young age.

But this really is...just odd.
 
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Ironically, I was watching this same video with two of my friends, one natural and one is BC'ing soon. They got kind of excited when they saw the title, but then when they saw how she executed the process, they were instantly turned off. I think they were happy to have some that would allow them to change it up sometimes, but they didn't like her tone as far as talking about her hair...
 
kmn1980 said:
I've seen this lady before. In order to not turn this thread into a totally asinine exchange I'll keep it short. I really do agree with you. The incessant need to prove that her hair isn't as "dull, kinky, nappy and bushy" as it appears by using that raggedy brush and tub of gel comes from the same place as the need to straighten it all to hell.

IIRC, there was another one of her videos where the viewers were calling her a poser because in it's natural, no-product state she does not have what appears to be 4b hair.
Click to expand...


re: the bold. I agree I looked at the 2nd link posted and it looks like 4a...maybe even some 3c. All the ecostyler and denmann brushing in the world will not give my 4b daughter curls like that lady has in the video.
 
She's just one of many victims of the hair texture hierarchy. This will continue until we learn to not only accept but embrace and appreciate the beauty of 4b hair in the same way that love is easily displayed for 3c and other curly hair types.

Eta: I wish people would stop calling their hair 4b just because it is 'coarse, rough, and difficult to handle'. Those attributes can come with any curl pattern!
 
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That woman definitely sounds like she has issues, lol.

I'm with the OP. There are definitely some natural heads who still hold tight to the straighter hair is better idea.
 
I think I've seen her before shortly before I BC'd. I don't think I noticed it at the time, but in watching this video, I did notice, in her wording, a level of disdain toward her hair in its natural, unaltered state.

Honestly, I think she may not even realize it and might be of the mind-set that she has fully accepted her natural hair. Personally, I don't find it to be my place to judge, educate, or attempt to point out any negative feelings she may have about her hair.

The plain and simple fact, is that relaxed or natural, a LOT of black women are simply unable or unwilling to accept their hair for what it is. Period! After generations and generations of being told that it was ugly, inferior, nappy and whatever else, I personally find it difficult to blame the women that feel that way. Not only that, but we all know of the discrimination within our own race where "good hair" is lauded above "nappy hair." For some us, it is not so easy to escape that mentality and if we can find a way to mimic, what we have idealized as the "good hair" many of us will jump at the opportunity to do so, even if it means spending hows brushing and ridiculous amounts of hair gel.

Hair has always been a touchy subject among black women, and whether any of us are willing to admit it or not, I think the vast majority of us would feel good if told that we have "good hair," even if we do not appreciate the ignorance and the idea that not all afro-textured hair is good.

At the end of the day, people are goig to do what they do. I am honest enough to admit that if I was not happy with the look or even the texture of my hair, I would do something with it to give it a different look; one that I was happier with.

Sorry if this comes off as a rant! I really am not intending to be mean or anything like that, I am just saying that not everyone can accept their hair for what it is. And those of us who have, can only lead by example in the hopes that the rest will follow. :)
 
Aside from the fact that she really dislikes her hair texture, all of that prepping her hair is not necessary. I'm 4a/4b and can get curls in 10-15 minutes. I don't know wha she is doing for 4 hours.
 
The title of this thread rubs me the wrong way. Just sayin'. I know it's sarcasm, but I hate how many natural women feel this way. All the hours of combing/messing with your hair probably contributes to slower progress.
 
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I guess she has puts on the gel, brushes for some time and then has to manipulate various small sections in finger coils.

Sianna very true! I'm sure we're all aware of that and it's very sad.

AfriPrincess411, the title was obviously stated that way due to the viewpoints of the video I posted which is why I put "sarcasm" in bold type. you know. Tongue in cheek? To show how foolish the viewpoint is? To show that it's not necessary?

You know?
ETA: I see your edit. Yes, it's very sad. She appears to be having good progress, the style lasts a week without her messing with it, so that's a good thing.
 
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHrzO-PEJTQ

In this video, if you look at the left side that has no gel, I don't see 4b. Now I'm not a hair-typing expert but her hair looks like 4a hair that she has obviously manipulated by pulling on it like she always does in he videos. I look at Nonie's pics of true 4b hair and compare it to hers and I'm not seeing 4b. Maybe a coarse 4a but not 4b.
 
Her hair looks like 4a maybe 4a/4b mixed.

MY hair cried seeing her rake that brush through her hair like that.
 
Your friend sounds like my sister! She hasn't used any heat on her hair for years, but she is no fine example 'cause she doesn't do a ding-dong-dang thing with her hair. Like, fo' real.

I went natural b/c I just like the way my hair feels. I don't get on people about what they do with their hair b/c it's on their head and not mind. Unless they're overprocessing...then I'm like, "Umm...excuse me...if you don't mind...maybe...I can tell you...if it's okay....", you know the drill.

But I CAN"T STAND IT when people talk about their naturally kinky hair like there is a potent spider growing out of their hair. She's right up there with the Dr. Miracle commercials! Ugh. That makes me cringe. I'd appreciate it if she would love herself or keep her mouth shut, b/c our kids don't need to be exposed to that mess.
 
Hey Jenboo - I haven't seen you around these parts lately. I always enjoy reading your posts.

jennboo said:
That woman definitely sounds like she has issues, lol.

I'm with the OP. There are definitely some natural heads who still hold tight to the straighter hair is better idea.
Click to expand...
 
I have seen this lady's vids many times I can't take anything she says seriously. She look crazy to me. Like she on medication or something.:ohwell:
 
Her hair looks like mine. I consider myself 4b. I don't do the curl defining stuff, though. But with gel I can get coils and waves. I haven't tried any raking, smoothing, and all of what she was doing. Doesn't look like something I want to do. Too much gel. Too much time.
 
kmn1980 said:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHrzO-PEJTQ

In this video, if you look at the left side that has no gel, I don't see 4b. Now I'm not a hair-typing expert but her hair looks like 4a hair that she has obviously manipulated by pulling on it like she always does in he videos. I look at Nonie's pics of true 4b hair and compare it to hers and I'm not seeing 4b. Maybe a coarse 4a but not 4b.
Click to expand...

She's like...a 4a/b mixture. If she upped her moisture, she'd get decent definition, I bet.
 
song_of_serenity said:
I guess she has puts on the gel, brushes for some time and then has to manipulate various small sections in finger coils.

Sianna very true! I'm sure we're all aware of that and it's very sad.

AfriPrincess411, the title was obviously stated that way due to the viewpoints of the video I posted which is why I put "sarcasm" in bold type. you know. Tongue in cheek? To show how foolish the viewpoint is? To show that it's not necessary?

You know?
ETA: I see your edit. Yes, it's very sad. She appears to be having good progress, the style lasts a week without her messing with it, so that's a good thing.
Click to expand...

I'm going to be honest. I edited my post because I realized I didn't read your whole post first. Stupid I know! But what you are saying is so true. I'm 4b and to be quite honest, I don't really care about defined curls. I always wanted the FLUFFY natural hair look. I don't see why everyone's natural hair needs to look the same.
 
song_of_serenity said:
Total sarcasm on my part in the title. :/

So I had to find this lady due to a natural acquaintance of mine (one of those soul sistah, mother earthy, not so fond of white people, all black people who get relaxers are devil mind infested types who's soon to not even be that) and saw the lady put up a new video.

Is having a lil curl THAT important that you have to shlack your hair with gel and brush for 5 minutes and then take about THREE to FOUR HOURS just for some curl definition??

REALLY?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0NU8gpBK4c

It's like...that's the only thing she dedicates her videos to.

DON'T GET ME WRONG.

It's not even the fact that she does this (heck, I rake some gel through my hair sometimes) and takes so long on it (I'm still floored, five hours?) It's the way she constantly speaks disdainfully of her own texture in all her videos that's just kind of sad. Like in one video "I went from dull, kinky, nappy bushy, cottony hair to to these gorgeous, spirally, shiny curls" and "There's something you can do with this type of hair to get these pretty curls. You can get definition, thank God!"

I know we all want to switch things up and all. And I know a few natural folk are quick to call relaxed heads "SELF HATERS" because they wear their hair straight. But unless you see someone with relaxed hair take on the "Oooh, my hair was so ugly and nappy, but ooh wee, look how lush and soft and bouncy, I got that white girl flow nah!" mindset, it's just a way to wear their hair. And you have just as many "self hating" naturals as people claim relaxed people can be.

Oh, and said acquaintance said of the lady "Well, at least she still loves curly hair. Black folks can have curly hair. But straight hair? No, something is just wrong *cue rant on brainwashing*" She doesn't even see that not embracing what you have, even as a natural is just as bad as running to get a relaxer at the sign of one kink just because it's "kinky, bushy and just nappy"

I digress. :/
Click to expand...

Oh absolutely. We all have our issues and I'm not going to claim to be issue free but hair texture hate or envy just is not my issue so I don't relate on this one. I know it's hard for some to believe but not every person with "4b hair" or whatever ya wanna call black, afro textured hair that is not curly wants curl definition. I guess getting this point across to some people is is kind of like convincing a stylist who believes that everybody with the slightest kink, coil or wave in their hair needs a relaxer that you don't want one. I think naturally curly hair looks better when it is not loaded down with glycerin based product - I think curls look much better when they're light and fluffy. I'm also not a fan of the tryin' too hard to get curls look either. This might be a minority opinion but I think there have to be at least some others.
 
So sad ... looks like she wants to cry every time she describes her own hair texture

basically she RESENTS her hair b/c it can't do what those w/ 3abc/4a can do and instead of exploring on YouTube and forums like this and blogs and fotki, etc all the wonderful things she CAN do w/ her texture .. she feels forced to go through this ridiculously time consuming ritual .. all the while cursing her napps for not cooperating (in her view: clumping) easily like her hair idols ....

I can only imagine the self-hating things that must come to mind when the week is up and she has to wash and start all over again :blush:

I really feel sorry for her .... she has no clue about the virtues of her OWN texture and is caught up trying to imitate the regimens of those w/ a looser curl/coil

We really need more 4Bs on YouTube showing the ropes b/c not for nothing ..but.... there is an ABUNDANCE of naturals on there but only a small fraction have 4B texture .. so if one is only exposed to the techniques/regimens of 3abc/4a (particulary silky textured as opposed to cottony versions of these categories) one would think that their ways of doing hair are the ONLY ways and those w/ 4B hair that don't know any better would surely try to do what they do and upon FAILING come to resent their texture even more...

This just makes me so sad b/c it is cuts deep, and I really wish more 4Bs embraced their texture ... knowledege is the key and figuring out the regimens/products/styles that suit and come easy to YOUR hair is so vital ... and videos like hers just reinforces why ...she represents a LARGE portion of 4B textured women who truly despise their hair b/c they are so busy wanting it to be like somebody else's texture all the while oblivious to the beauty they possess right on their OWN heads :sad:
 
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