4a/b Shrinkage is REALLY Discouraging - HELP!

[BlackDiamond21]

So I have kept my natural hair in crochet braids, tree braids and a weave for about 5 months now. I love wearing wash n go's but in the winter it was becoming an issue due to the temp so I braided and weaved it. I did have a trim in-between installs (still getting rid of that damn color) as it was my first trim since I went 100% natural in Feb 2011. When my hair is flat ironed, last time was when I got the trim and the only time I plan to flat iron, it is chin length on the sides and forehead length for the bangs. So I am very proud of all the growth I have accomplished in a year

I took my hair down last night and of course I loved it because it was stretched, BIG and had that braid pattern to it. I hot oil treated it, protein washed it and moisturized deep conditioned it to boot! Then I tried out an all natural shea butter plus essential natural oils recipe (YouTube) for my first ever natural hair braid out, that I took down this morning and I looked like a HOT mess (Buckwheat anyone???). So I cowashed my hair and went back to my KCC regiment.

So after taking down this last install and going back to my wash n go, I am very disappointed in my shrinkage I am tired of my small curly fro that doesn't come close to reflecting my true length. My fro/hair is so tightly coiled, I still haven't gotten to where my hair has "hang time". I have tired styling it with bobby pins and I always feel like I look unattractive and un-styled. I have searched around YouTube/Google for ideas and the ones I see for my hair type, just are not for me. So I always end up with just headband with some KCC curls unless I pick/blow it out to a fro.

I went from SUPER HIGH/I LOVE MY NATURAL HAIR/HEAR ME ROAR FROM THE MOUNTAIN TOPS before "putting it away" for the winter to today where I feel so unattractive and so disappointed. The shrinkage is simply FRUSTRATING!!! I guess I had, stupidly , hoped that after all this time I would have some hang time to play with and more style options. Even with the growth I attained over the winter, I am ready to put it right back in braids which is crazy b/c the whole time it was braided up all I could think about was my getting back to my natural hair. But I want to give my hair a break... I am literally in tears I am so frustrated

How do you ladies get through these length/style humps?

Thanks in advance!

 

[tiffers]

Don't be discouraged. I think we all get frustrated with the shrinkage from time to time. I'm almost APL and am not even close to having hangtime so I definitely feel your pain.

Have you tried bantu knots, cornrows or flat twists? Those can give you seriously stretched out fros. You can maybe even flexirods or Curlformers if you wanna be fancy.

 

[BlackDiamond21]

. I'm almost APL and am not even close to having hangtime hwell so I definitely feel your pain.

Really? I honestly didn't realize that could happen. I see so many pics online... I guess I assumed it would not shrink so much...

Have you tried bantu knots, cornrows or flat twists? Those can give you seriously stretched out fros. You can maybe even flexirods or Curlformers if you wanna be fancy.

I did bantu knots on my BSL relaxed hair and loved it. I am afraid how it would look on my TWA. I would love to try flat twists or cornrow outs (basically what I have seen after I took down each install over the past 6 months) but I think I will end up using the wrong products and my hair will look dull (like it did this morning with Naptural's85 shea butter recipe) instead of shiny and healthy.

Thanks for the virtual hug

 

[qchelle]

You could never look like Buckwheat, hun. You're much too pretty

 

[mslionheart]

I took my hair down last night and of course I loved it because it was stretched, BIG and had that braid pattern to it. I hot oil treated it, protein washed it and moisturized deep conditioned it to boot! Then I tried out an all natural shea butter plus essential natural oils recipe (YouTube) for my first ever natural hair braid out, that I took down this morning and I looked like a HOT mess (Buckwheat anyone???). So I cowashed my hair and went back to my KCC regiment.

Was your hair wet or dry when you added the shea butter mix and put in the braids? Generally, I find that most styles look best when I do them on hair that is dry and somewhat stretched. Whenever I wash my hair, I put in some sort of leave-in then let it air dry in big twists. After the hair is completely dry, I take down the twists, add a moisturizer then style as desired. My hair shrinks a lot and becomes very compact so if I style while it's wet, the end result isn't as cute as I'd like.

 

[JudithO]

I got to 1 inch from BSL.... My hair completely shrunken looked like 3 inches of hair. It's just the nature of our hair, even if I got to waist length, I don't expect my hair to hang... (but I'm a "4c" type, but my shrinkage may be much more than yours)... look @ Miss Lala's video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PjhwlCJIKIQ&feature=relmfu at 3:06 .... She is past WL hair, but her completely shrunken hair has no hang time.

1. Accept this: That is the hair you have completely shrunken (this is the hardest part, but once you accept, smooth sailing)..

2. Since you know what to do to love your hair...sweetheart, I say do it.... All the time... so you keep loving your hair because that is really important... we should not forget to enjoy our hair in the midst of our quest for length. Keep it braided and twisted after you wash, so it dries stretched.

Good luck.

 

[BlackDiamond21]

Was your hair wet or dry when you added the shea butter mix and put in the braids? Generally, I find that most styles look best when I do them on hair that is dry and somewhat stretched. Whenever I wash my hair, I put in some sort of leave-in then let it air dry in big twists. After the hair is completely dry, I take down the twists, add a moisturizer then style as desired. My hair shrinks a lot and becomes very compact so if I style while it's wet, the end result isn't as cute as I'd like.

Yes I did do it wet as seen on Naptural's85 video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91qQld7o_pg&feature=plcp I even used her shea butter recipes but after rewatching just now, I did mess up and use the pomade instead of the cream when braiding my hair last night... UGH! I will try it dry one of these weekends, thank you for suggestion I am learning I do not need to experiment on work days b/c when it doesn't work I stress about it...like today!

 

[Nonie]

OP, I absolutely love shrinkage. I love it because:

• It gives me an option to wear my hair short w/o cutting it;
• It keeps my hair up and away from my neck and clothes so that I don't have a messy collar and my face neck aren't breaking out or looking like a greased monster
• It helps me forget about my hair and get used to it being "short" so that when I accidentally do a length check or decide I want a longer do, I'm pleasantly surprised
• I love my coils. They may not be visible to anyone else unless I let them get up close and personal but I know they are there and I think they are beautiful and I feel beautiful sporting such a mane
• I have never cared to have hair like anyone else and I don't try to do what other people do. Instead I play with just my hair and let it show me what it can do; and so for me shrinkage is like part of this adventure. My tarantula hairdo was a fluke and I absolutely loved it. Just wondered what would happen if I rolled my twists and let them airdry and I went from this:
  
  
  
  ...to this:
  
  

And boy did I feel hawt with that do, even though my hubby thought it looked like tarantulas on my head.

​

• And then there was my Lisa Simpson do. Another "out-of-the-blue" invention that I had never seen anywhere and was not trying to create but my hair insisted that I wasn't going to have just a regular ol' puff but it'd add a twist to my puff and once I stopped fighting it, I LOVED it. I was trying to reproduce something similar to my signature look then:
  
  
  
  ...but my cornrows were too fat and so the ends would not blend together into one puff. I gave up and to my surprise, I absolutely adored the style--as did so many people! And it's still one of my favorite styles:
  
  
• Shrinkage help my style stay nice looking all day: the wind could blow hard, I could be caught in a drizzle... While I won't go out seeking these trouble-makers, they do little to ruin my hair when my hair is shrunken
• Shrinkage gives my hair more versatility. I read so many times how folks saw a style they liked and want to cut their their hair like that, and just smiled coz I know I can pull it off w/o cutting my hair. Like the curly cut where the top is longer than the sides and back? I can achieve that by taking advantage of shrinkage and patting the areas I need to be short.
• I do love the shock in people's faces when I go from having "long" hair to having "short" hair and back to "long" hair.

(I personally think it's crazy for anyone with 4B hair to do WNGs, but that's just me. I don't get tangles and so never interested in getting them and WNGs are just IMO a recipe for that and single strand knots--another problem I never have to deal with).
Anyway, recently, @MsLizziA posted a video on how she gets big hair with a wash n go. (Link) Otherwise, twist-outs and braid-outs will help stretch your hair. @pookaloo83 rocks some cute "-outs". Another person who can help with stretched styles is @Mandy4610.

But as @judy4all said, do whatever you need to do to enjoy your hair. If you hate shrinkage and hate the process of always having to fight it, then wear your hair stretched at all times--by whatever means--and have a blast.

 

[pookaloo83]

My hair shrunken. When it's soaking wet it's a twa.

My hair after I stretch and style.

I have tons of pics, but that's just an example.

I wash and dc on my wash days, then stretch my hair in flexirods. I found curlformers to be time consuming. After I unroll them and my hair is stretched, I spriitz with a lil water so that my braidouts can set and give me definition. Not soaking wet, but slightly damp. I get a spray bottle of water and spritz my hand with it once. Sometimes twice and work it through the section I'm working with. Add an oil or a dime size amount of moisturizer then braid. When I unbraid I get the above pics. I rebraid every night and that makes it more bigger and more defined each day. I may add a lil water again to get it to revert just a bit if it gets too stretched out.

@BlackDiamond21

 

[PlatinumBronze]

Shrinkage is a biscuit. I mentioned shrinkage in RT last night. My hair shrinks something terrible especially when I detangle using my Denman brush. My bangs twisted and stretched touches my top lip however when in its shrunken state they are maybe 2-3 inches. I've come to the conclusion that I will try to keep my hair stretched 95% of the time.

 

[lamaria211]

As always Nonie is bringing us 4b heads back to reality I never thought of my shrinkage as a blessing but when you put it that way I do

 

[HeChangedMyName]

I was JUST thinking of starting a thread on why shrinkage is good. . .for encouragement sake.

I have shrinkage too, My hair when stretched, is past the base of my neck, but shrunken. . .it looks like a super teeny weeny afro.

I think shrinkage is just one of those things we have to experiment with and learn how to work on "our" hair.

For example, you may have to stretch your hair with product to weigh it down. That is how I have to do it, because braid outs are a HOT MESS on my hair(until I figure it out)

I find that once my hair is stretched I have no idea what to do with it.

Nonie those are some CUTE!!! hairstyles you got there, I might have to copy.

 

[DarkJoy]

Mine is just past nl when stretch but shrunk it also does the super twa thing. Our hair is the most versatile on the planet. Dry "outs" are the best at stretching. Sometimes I stretch the roots by putting my just wet and washed hair in 4-6 tight puffs til dry. They are almost bone straight by then. Then its easy to do a dry twist out and let set for overnight with rollers on the ends. That shows the length nicely.

 

[fluffyforever]

My longest layer is BSL, shortest layer ( above forehead) is chin length. I have shrinkage so strong that all layers will look like a 2 inch twa if I dry my hair loose after washing. I could never do a WNG for this reason.

I've come to accept my shrinkage over these last 5 years being natural. I don't even think about it that much because I never let my hair shrink loose-- only when braided or twisted. Keeping the hair stretched while drying stops at least 50% of my shrinkage.

I find that I have to braid or twist my hair every night, but it's not time consuming if I kept my hair stretched from the previous day. I just put my hair into 8-10 big twists, put on my cap, and fluff it out in the morning for a bun or puff style.

 

[FoxxyLocs]

My hair still shrinks to neck length if I let it. I don't wear puffs or WNGs because of the tangles I get, but the actual shrinkage I don't mind. If I want my length to show I just flat iron or maybe do a braidout.

 

[BlackDiamond21]

hi ladies! thank you all for responding. It took me forever to figure out, remember, how to find this thread and thank everyone for the responses - lol!

Anywho, I am embracing my shrinkage now that it is hot outside and I am doing my WnGs. I realize I am not great at twisting or braiding my hair every night, so shrinkage is what I get in the morning and.... I am HAPPY with it. I think having my hair up for so many months had me forgetting what was under there but now that my hair has been FREE for some weeks, we are happy as we have ever been <3.

I appreciate all the encouragement and suggestions!!!!

BD21

 

[alive]

hi ladies! thank you all for responding. It took me forever to figure out, remember, how to find this thread and thank everyone for the responses - lol!

Anywho, I am embracing my shrinkage now that it is hot outside and I am doing my WnGs. I realize I am not great at twisting or braiding my hair every night, so shrinkage is what I get in the morning and.... I am HAPPY with it. I think having my hair up for so many months had me forgetting what was under there but now that my hair has been FREE for some weeks, we are happy as we have ever been <3.

I appreciate all the encouragement and suggestions!!!!

BD21

good for you BlackDiamond21!

 

[Newtogrow]

Embrace the shrinkage!