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Is hair texture the new paper bag test???

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Of late, I'm starting to wonder if people w/ looser textures, relaxed heads, and even mixed race people of any sort are welcome here? The level of bigotry and angry tone (both overt and covert) is just stunning to watch. I've been a member here too long and I'm too observant to not have noticed it and have a good idea of why it's happening. I don't have a hair texture bias either...y'all don't know mine because I'm not telling. I don't buy into Andre's system anyhow. The Andre system is too flawed to take seriously as a accurate way to describe hair for any useful purposes IMHO, but mostly people are talking about aesthetics anyway.
Yes, I think there is a love/ hate relationship with type 3 here. But most if not all of the most offensive comments are towards type 4s from other type 4s...
 
Yeah, I know we can all get along. Cali asked a fair but heck of a loaded question that's gonna get some polarized views/positions.

Still learning everyday from this board, and this question was good food for thought.
 
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Now i want to know what is the paper bag test? sorry for the ignorance ._.
Your skin color is compared to the color of a brown paper bag. If your skin is darker than the paper bag, then you don't "pass the test" and, therefore, is not accepted in that social setting or group.
 
All this hair typing is for the birds anyway. Just cuz your hair fits some number on a chart doesn't mean that you can simply follow the chart and get good results (or someone's reggie, for that matter). Most BW/black biracials know fully well they have African textured hair w/o the alphabet soup krapola, so much of this really is about fine tuning artificial separations. How many people here have tried what a "hair twin" does w/ disasterous results on their own heads? Folks need to start thinking for themselves and quit being lazy about doing what's best for you. Why hand Andre walker or someone else all that power anyway? :giggle:

Sometimes the reason a member doesn't "get love" isn't about their hair texture at all, but what they do (or don't do) w/ their hair. How many folks post pics they really shouldn't if they want a positive response? If your hair looks busted, it's not a texture issue but a busted issue. A little self-awareness could do folks a world of good.

Folks here will jump on a YTer or a celeb in a sec for having jacked hair, but suddenly get silent when a member rolls up looking a HAM? Well, why be "honest" sometimes and not others? That too is another common hypocrisy. Maybe if people were a bit more honest w/ members some of this hair texture mess would drop.
 
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Sometimes the one on the far right has the a fro with a headband, other times it's one with 2 high ponytail buns on either side of her head.


banner1.jpg


banner2.jpg

Oh snap....lol. :grin:
 
thick hair is another thing i noticed on this board. the general consensus is to immediately chop hair off where it's thin, so it'll grow in thick. but some people naturally have sparse or thin hair, & if they chop it, it'll just grow back thin.

that was my case, & the main reason why i never posted my length shots when i was APL. my relaxed hair was thin & see-through due mostly to my fine hair & not poor hair care practices, & i remember reading a post about "how ugly thin hair is" :nono: it was hurtful.

i also notice ladies with long thick hair get much more "thanks" than long thin haired ladies when they meet their goals.

every length goal met deserves congratulations :yep:

The above is why it took me three years to post a picture of the back of my head bc, of the hurtful comments on thin hair, my hair is naturally thin/fine. I have noticed the thanks "phenomenon" as well :grin::blush: oh well, i may never get that many thanks:drunk:
 
All this hair typing is for the birds anyway. Just cuz your hair fits some number on a chart doesn't mean that you can simply follow the chart and get good results (or someone's reggie, for that matter). Most BW/black biracials know fully well they have African textured hair w/o the alphabet soup krapola, so much of this really is about time tuining artificial separations. How many people here have tried what a "hair twin" does w/ disasterous results on their own heads? Folks need to start thinking for themselves and quit being lazy about doing what's best for you. Why hand Andre walker or someone else all that power anyway? :giggle:

Sometimes the reason a member doesn't "get love" isn't about their hair texture at all, but what they do (or don't do) w/ their hair. How many folks post pics they really shouldn't if they want a positive response? If your hair looks busted, it's not a texture issue but a busted issue. A little self-awareness could do folks a world of good.

Folks here will jump on a YTer or a celeb in a sec for having jacked hair, but suddenly get silent when a member rolls up looking a HAM? Well, why be "honest" sometimes and not others? That too is another common hypocrisy. Maybe if people were a bit more honest w/ members some of this hair texture mess would drop.

No one wants to be that person who to tell someone "Your hair looks stupid". Especially here? People come back here on a regular basis and no one wants to be branded as that person who tries to make other people feel bad about their own hair.

On the other hand, the YouTube person isn't here. It's like how we'll criticize a celebrity vs. someone we see every day. I may make fun of Tammy Faye Baker's make-up, but I wouldn't say those things to someone I have to interact with every day.

Maybe it's cowardice? I don't know. I'm certainly guilty of it. I know for a fact that if I showed up one day and told someone "Dang, that twist out looks busted" I'll get attacked for that. It's best to just keep quiet on certain things.
 
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Also, the second one from the left, either she had a big chop, or she installed a really nice weave?


Yes, I sit around thinking about these things :look:

I thought her hair was pinned back...no, you're not the only one who thinks about stuff like that.
 
That's an install girl.....:lachen:.



Pfft, I can't tell the difference. You sure it's not a really nice lace-front?


The other day, I had to look up what a half-wig was, just so I could know what everyone was talking about. :rolleyes:
 
When reading a thread or post i pay more attention to the ones who have a similar hair texture than me (type 4). I know i'll be able to learn or take some thing new from that post. The others (type 3) i read through but don't pay too much attention to them. So i prefer to know and don't mind when woman list hair type.
 
No one wants to be that person who to tell someone "Your hair looks stupid". Especially here? People come back here on a regular basis and no one wants to be branded as that person who tries to make other people feel bad about their own hair.

On the other hand, the YouTube person isn't here. It's like how we'll criticize a celebrity vs. someone we see every day. I may make fun of Tammy Faye Baker's make-up, but I wouldn't say those things to someone I have to interact with every day.

Maybe it's cowardice? I don't know. I'm certainly guilty of it. I know for a fact that if I showed up one day and told someone "Dang, that twist out looks busted" I'll get attacked for that. It's best to just keep quiet on certain things.
I think of it as having tact. If the poster asks for brutal honesty that's one thing, but I don't want to unintentionally hurt someone's feelings :ohwell:...
 
No one wants to be that person who to tell someone "Your hair looks stupid". Especially here? People come back here on a regular basis and no one wants to be branded as that person who tries to make other people feel bad about their own hair.

On the other hand, the YouTube person isn't here. It's like how we'll criticize a celebrity vs. someone we see every day. I may make fun of Tammy Faye Baker's make-up, but I wouldn't say those things to someone I have to interact with every day.

Maybe it's cowardice? I don't know. I'm certainly guilty of it. I know for a fact that if I showed up one day and told someone "Dang, that twist out looks busted" I'll get attacked for that. It's best to just keep quiet on certain things.

It's both cowardly and hypocritical. You don't know who's reading this stuff. This site is on the open interwebz for any and all to see. Just cuz they don't post doesn't mean they don't see it. If people are unwilling to say something to a member (ie to her "face") and will do so about a non member "behind their back".....why should the member assume you're telling the truth at all when you compliment them? :nono: People sometimes forget that you have an "audience" that's watching. If the open media got ahold of this site and put it on the Oprah show, for example, just how would much of this stuff look when exposed to the light of day? :lachen:If people felt bad about Chris Rock, they'd dig a hole and hide if some of this stuff went wide! :look:

Non members are people too, we shouldn't forget. If you wouldn't say a thing to their face or on their YT channel, one shouldn't fool themselves that those people don't find out anyway. The target hit home even if they weren't here! ;)

IMHO that's where some of the insecurities about texture are coming from. Think other members don't notice stuff? How much of the compliments are real and how much of the silence is real? Since every site has it's "political correctness" how much fawning is just conforming to the tone of the site? This all helps keep people in an insecure lather....if they let it!
 
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The above is why it took me three years to post a picture of the back of my head bc, of the hurtful comments on thin hair, my hair is naturally thin/fine. I have noticed the thanks "phenomenon" as well :grin::blush: oh well, i may never get that many thanks:drunk:

that's reading kinda deep into it imo. But my hair is thin and I never thought twice about posting pics......I'm gonna use every penny of my 6 fiddy and get as much help with my hair as I can so I can reach my goals.

Very sorry to hear about you feeling hurt behind other posts.
 
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I think of it as having tact. If the poster asks for brutal honesty that's one thing, but I don't want to unintentionally hurt someone's feelings :ohwell:...

:nono: Tact is the exercise of discretion. You don't just turn it on and off....after all, we are all strangers to each other, right? You're either tactful the vast majority of the time or not, IMHO. Hey, we're all human! :grin:

If you are indiscreet in 59 posts and then decide to be tactful in 2 posts, well....people are not so unobservant, let's just say. :lachen:
 
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Based on some incidents I've seen of late, it's increasingly becoming clear that not all are welcome or at least as welcome as they may have been in the past.

Being envious of others will not help you. You need to love yourself 1st and foremost. I'm saying this because people have their biases and preferances, but you can't let that bother you because they will not change. I rarely see anyone w/ a texture like mine here or on the interwebz, but that's cool. I dig my hair and take good care of it. That's really all you can do.

Can I get an AMEN on the Bolded from Jamarra because its so true...
 
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It's both cowardly and hypocritical. You don't know who's reading this stuff. This site is on the open interwebz for any and all to see. Just cuz they don't post doesn't mean they don't see it. If people are unwilling to say something to a member (ie to her "face") and will do so about a non member "behind their back".....why should the member assume you're telling the truth at all when you compliment them? :nono: People sometimes forget that you have an "audience" that's watching. If the open media got ahold of this site and ut it on the Oprah show, for example, just how would much of this stuff look when exposed to the light of day? :lachen:If people felt bad about Chris Rock, they'd dig a hole and hide if some of this stuff went wide! :look:

Non members are people too, we shouldn't forget. If you wouldn't say a thing to their face or on their YT channel, one shouldn't fool themselves that those people don't find out anyway. The target hit home even if they weren't here! ;)

IMHO that's where some of the insecurities about texture are coming from. Think other members don't notice stuff? How much of the compliments are real and how much of the silence is real? Since every site has it's "political correctness" how much fawning is just conforming to the tone of the site? This all helps keep people in an insecure lather....if they let it!


You're right, but isn't that how people are in general? I mean, look at the news. Someone is always saying something about someone who isn't there, and yes it's behind their backs. I'm not saying it's right or ok to do just because it's a common practice.


I was guilty of joining in on that thread where that girl was showing how to straighten hair (normally, I don't, especially in cases where someone's hair practice doesn't apply to me). I did my best to not insult her, but I was incredibly critical of her practices (it kind of did get out of line with the contact lens fiasco :lachen:). It never occurred to me to go to her youtube page and tell her that her hair is damaged, because the conversation about it was here, not there. This site is about healthy hair care, I would've been a complete d*ckhead to go to her page and start spouting off about healthy hair practices, especially if she's not very concerned about it. I also know that people with that hair type lurk here, and if I could save one person that amount of damage, I was going to take the opportunity to point it out. And in general, I keep my mouth shut on lots of people's heads. But really, I took offense to someone trying to teach something, only to lead people down the wrong path.

Anyway, there's a time and a place for all sorts of discussions. Here is the healthy hair place. It's kind of tactless to go to someone's own page, and criticize them in front of their audience. I think that would've been the "hater" thing to do.
 
Bene I'm not concerned w/ "people in general". I'm talking specifics and specificaly this site. People at this site always wanna use "society' to justify some things and then the same "society' to blame for others. Responsibility is always in someone else's court :rolleyes:

Lemme make it plain and simple. Many BW seem to be concerned (overly, IMHO) w/ what "others" think. "Others" include everybody from White folks and "other races", to Black men, to other Black women. People constantly complain of being stereotyped. Am I wrong? I see this everyday that I'm here and I wonder why folks care so much about what they can't control and ignore what they can control?

If this is a concern of yours (English "you" understood), then be aware of adding fuel to the fire and don't do it. If you don't want people to think BW are jealous, spiteful, etc over "others" about hair and skin issues, then DON'T behave like you are. One can't cry foul when others say it cuz they have proof was given them. Folks seem to think they can DEMAND love and respect from the general masses, let not give it to themselves and others.

In short, all this hypocrisy and jealousy is making the problems worse both on site and even off it. It's needlessly feeding insecurities. I've been at the rodeo too long to say otherwise. :giggle:
 
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It's both cowardly and hypocritical. You don't know who's reading this stuff. This site is on the open interwebz for any and all to see. Just cuz they don't post doesn't mean they don't see it. If people are unwilling to say something to a member (ie to her "face") and will do so about a non member "behind their back".....why should the member assume you're telling the truth at all when you compliment them? :nono: People sometimes forget that you have an "audience" that's watching. If the open media got ahold of this site and put it on the Oprah show, for example, just how would much of this stuff look when exposed to the light of day? :lachen:If people felt bad about Chris Rock, they'd dig a hole and hide if some of this stuff went wide! :look:

Non members are people too, we shouldn't forget. If you wouldn't say a thing to their face or on their YT channel, one shouldn't fool themselves that those people don't find out anyway. The target hit home even if they weren't here! ;)

IMHO that's where some of the insecurities about texture are coming from. Think other members don't notice stuff? How much of the compliments are real and how much of the silence is real? Since every site has it's "political correctness" how much fawning is just conforming to the tone of the site? This all helps keep people in an insecure lather....if they let it!
I'm so sick of the bullsheeet thats been going on here .....*Emotional Response* I know......but I am!!!!!

we have lost so many long hairs, and long term members, and many more are signing up to bone out, all that will be left is a bunch of knuckle head know it all's tripped up on stupid ish! and that will be the forum
 
No one wants to be that person who to tell someone "Your hair looks stupid". Especially here? People come back here on a regular basis and no one wants to be branded as that person who tries to make other people feel bad about their own hair.

On the other hand, the YouTube person isn't here. It's like how we'll criticize a celebrity vs. someone we see every day. I may make fun of Tammy Faye Baker's make-up, but I wouldn't say those things to someone I have to interact with every day.

Maybe it's cowardice? I don't know. I'm certainly guilty of it. I know for a fact that if I showed up one day and told someone "Dang, that twist out looks busted" I'll get attacked for that. It's best to just keep quiet on certain things.
I just figure if I get 500 looks and 3 thanks/replies my hair wasn't as cute as I thought.:ohwell:
 
honestly, i don't care what people think of my hair ..and i wont let society bring my self esteem down due to my hair type not fitting their standards.
i love my hair.i have alot more confidence when i wear it out.and at the end of the day, thats all that matters...is what i think of my own.
 
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I'm so sick of the bullsheeet thats been going on here .....*Emotional Response* I know......but I am!!!!!

we have lost so many long hairs, and long term members, and many more are signing up to bone out, all that will be left is a bunch of knuckle head know it all's tripped up on stupid ish! and that will be the forum

Bang on right. I personally know several members who have BEAUTIFUL hair and tons of advice that simply refuse to engage anymore. They can't take the drama and perpetually offended vibe. What sort of info is being lost, well that's anyone's guess?! It's not just "oldheads" either, but newbs too. :nono: Now open season on YTers.

This forum was and is a great resource to learn to take care of your long hair, but the "well of long hair info" is actually drying up. I've seen threads seeking "roll calls" of folks and people simply don't say anything. I know there are tons of relaxed super longhaired members, tons of natural so called Andre 2s- 4s, brothers up in here, and the list goes on...stone silence tho they are still members/lurking. It's a shame.

The irony is that many members who folks think "moved on" are actually still members and active readers. :grin: I really wish folks knew how much they're cutting off their nose to spite their faces w/ all this melodrama. Nobody wants to be picked apart because they have the "wrong UnPC" texture, for their skin color, etc. If they see that happening frequently to others, why should they assume it won't happen to them? Few sane people want to put out a hand and pull back a nub! :giggle:
 
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This is the OLD ruler test actually. Frankly, OP your question was a loaded one. It assumes that it's the "Andre 3" people who are so fixated on hair texture and that they are the ones who volunteer this info more readily than "Andre 4 people". I don't see this at all on this site. If anything, people are ASKED what their hair type is, frequently...much too frequently. Then when they answer, folks spend precious time debating whether or not they're telling the truth :look::blush:. If you are an "Andre 3", should you lie to make others feel comfortable? I'm starting to think you really must if you want some peace! :look::grin:

Much of this emphasis on texture is coming from the fact that it seems half our board is suddenly going natural. Given that so many BW have no real practical knowledge of their hair and its texture, I suspect many secretly hope they will have a hair type that they end up not having. Once they have their hopes dashed and fears confirmed, many simply get very passive-aggressive about the matter. Either they LOUDLY tout their texture over others or they spend too much time worrying about other folks' textures....both of these camps spend inordinate amount of time/money/thought trying to change THEIR texture or being in denial about it. This isn't about anyone else, it's about them. I understand people have their insecurities, but that doesn't give them the right to inflict or project them on to other people. They need to accept themselves before demanding that others do.

Of late, I'm starting to wonder if people w/ looser textures, relaxed heads, and even mixed race people of any sort are welcome here? The level of bigotry and angry tone (both overt and covert) is just stunning to watch. I've been a member here too long and I'm too observant to not have noticed it and have a good idea of why it's happening. I don't have a hair texture bias either...y'all don't know mine because I'm not telling. I don't buy into Andre's system anyhow. The Andre system is too flawed to take seriously as a accurate way to describe hair for any useful purposes IMHO, but mostly people are talking about aesthetics anyway.

Rulers work both ways folks. :yep: People sit up and openly dismiss people w/ a texture different than their own, so hurt feels go in all directions, not just one.

As for there being a long vs short hair bias, well this is The LONG HAIR Care Forum...you knew that when you signed on. :lachen: That dog don't hunt. Some folks will find anything to get a badditude about.
WEEELLLLLLL!!!!!
 
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