Do you think white folks are sincere when the compliment your natural hair?

[Kinkyhairlady]

I don't think they are to be honest. Not sure why but I get the impression they're not. Today I walked into a meeting and one white lady blurts out oh my hair is nice. I'm like caught off guard and say thanks. I looked at the faces of the other ladies and they had fake smiles on. Then the one that complimented me kept looking at me. Lol

Super awkward moment.

 

[moda]

I do, and I honestly don't care if they are not. I know my hair is fly and if they aren't genuine when they compliment me oh well what the hayle do they know anyway

 

[NikkiQ]

Does it really matter if its sincere or not? I would rather a fake compliment than ANYONE regardless of race saying something ignorant about it. And idk if the issue of race should even be brought into it b/c there are some fake black people out there too.

 

[Nonie]

Hell yeah! My hair is the shizzle. I know this. And every compliment I get, I believe 100%.

I dunno but I think the only time someone would wonder about a compliment she got is if she herself wasn't too comfortable with whatever was being complimented. Like when I was overweight and not happy with my body, and on days I wore something I didn't think looked right but didn't have an alternative because I hadn't done my laundry or whatever, if someone then complimented me on what I was wearing (especially if they said it looked good on me erplexed), I'd wonder if they were being sincere. Why? Because I didn't think I looked good enough for that to even become a topic of discussion.

So yeah, I'm rarely suspicious of compliments. And it's not because I am so naive as to think people can't be cheeky. There are just some things I am so grateful for and so proud of that I buy into every compliment I get. My hair is definitely one of those things I wouldn't change and give thanks daily for. I know I might sound crazy to some, but I SWEAR I adore my hair; and the adoration is even more now that I've seen it can grow beyond SL.

Now the day that stylist messed my hair up and made it look like poop, if someone had told me it was cute, I'd know she was full of ish. Why? Coz I know poop when I see it. A friend did try to claim it was cute but I called her out on the BS by showing her a magnified breakdown of the mess I had going on there. No one else complimented me on the do because I dunno, seems people I hang around are pretty honest. They didn't call it ugly. They called it "interesting".

 

[MyInvisibleChyrsalis]

Most people i run into are sincere, but if you feel funny, maybe they were just talking about you and you caught them off guard.

Sent from my HTC Glacier using HTC Glacier

 

[pookaloo83]

One white lady said to me "Love the hair!" I didn't know if I should thank her because I thought deep down she is clowning me. So I just gave her one of their infamous fake smiles. I don't think she was sincere to be honest. My hair was exactly like this.

 

[lux10023]

i do...i myself am amazed at all the things we can do with our hair....i find myself staring like wow thats really cool....when i see a great head of hair on one of my fellow bros/sis

the versatility is insane...

 

[Ladybelle]

It depends. Some are really sincere & genuine, while others are not. So, I take it all in context. When I think they aren't being sincere, I always reply with "thank you, and I loooove your tan!" and give the smile.

 

[moda]

One white lady said to me "Love the hair!" I didn't know if I should thank her because I thought deep down she is clowning me. So I just gave her one of their infamous fake smiles. I don't think she was sincere to be honest. My hair was exactly like this.

pookaloo83 why did you think she was clowning you? Did you like it? I thought it looked fine and would have made a similar comment to you. So did you thank her?

 

[ChristmasCarol]

One white lady said to me "Love the hair!" I didn't know if I should thank her because I thought deep down she is clowning me. So I just gave her one of their infamous fake smiles. I don't think she was sincere to be honest. My hair was exactly like this.

pookaloo83

Are you kidding? That's really cute!

As per OP's ? - I'd probably believe it was sincere. I'm not good at spotting fakeness in White folk

 

[SherylsTresses]

No, because some ladies are still unsure if their natural hair is considered "professional" in their workplace.

 

[Ozma]

I no longer care what their motives are. I say thanks and keep on moving.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

Though I don't really care all that much, I have pondered a few comments.

Someone will say "I wish my hair could do that!" and then in the next breath talk about how they don't leave the house without flat ironing their wavy/loose curly hair. I'm like hmmm.

 

[Curlykale]

Some people are honest and others are not. If a person wants to spontaneously lie, I let it be their problem. If you feel beautiful and relaxed and you happen to meet other people who are so clearly uncomfortable with it, they definitely have a problem, or more than one, and you don't. Sometimes that awkward feeling is just an impression and it is only a result of different groups of people who meet and are curious about each other and nothing else. The question that can clear up your mind in a situation like this is: do YOU believe a person can absolutely love your hair? And why. At the end of the day that's all that matters.

 

[LittleLuxe]

I think most white folks care a lot less about some of the things we struggle with than we'd like to believe, jmo. Unless you felt things were straight up fake or suspect with the situation I think Nonie's position is a little more likely.

 

[Nelli04]

Half the time I don't...they may be genuine in saying they like your hair, but I doubt any of them like it enough to want it on their head. jmho

 

[Transformer]

Nope! Don't believe they are sincere...they are just being charitable or want to seem hip.

I'm super confident. I'm sporting about 20 plaits in my head and it's GREY as hell. I've decided to forego coloring for awhile.

 

[Kinkyhairlady]

When I first went natural my co workers were so fascinated with my hair and would make a big deal when I switched it up.

One lady asked me if I went to a wedding when my hair was up in a Afro pony. I looked at her like shut up and told her no my hair is naturally like this and I did nothing special to it. They all are a bunch of hypocrites anyways. I love my hair and could careless what they think but at the same time if they aren't being honest I rather they keep it to themselves.

 

[Curlykale]

They all are a bunch of hypocrites anyways.

Sorry, I have to disagree (unless you mean your coworkers).

 

[choconillaprincess]

Nothing can be applied to all white people or any other ethnic group... Some are genuine some are not you can't make such a general statement... But I like to take all compliments as genuine because I like getting compliments!

 

[PinkGirlFluff]

I'm not sure but I don't really think about it. I sure hope they don't care about whether my compliments are genuine because chances are they are not. lmbo. I can't fault somebody for doing to me what I do to them on the regular. They commit offenses to hair that should be called out but to be politically correct I'll keep my mouth closed.

Not to say I'm walking around being fake but I don't want to hurt somebody's feelings when everybody is going nuts over hair I think is lack luster. I'll politely say it's nice and keep it moving.

 

[aishasoleil]

It has been *my* experience that when someone (regardless of race, but since the post asks specifically about white people...) takes the time to compliment my hair I believe them to be sincere. I have no way of knowing if they really are unless they come right out and say "I like your hair... NOT!"
All in all, I agree with Nonie. I don't care if a compliment is sincere or not. As long as the person giving it isn't being obvious with her/his sarcasam or insincerity, I smile, say thank you and keep it moving.

I do wonder, though, why we care so much about what white people think about our hair. This has been a recurring topic since the natural hair "boom" (so to speak). Most of the compliments I have received in the short time I have been natural (only 2 yrs) have been from white people. Heck, when I was just thinking about embracing my kinks my biggest supporters were white. Maybe it depends on where you live...?

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

Not all the time.

 

[CurlyMoo]

I take the compliment and keep going. I feel the compliments have been sincere. If they weren't that's their problem.

Recently out of the blue, a Black co-worker told me she liked my hair, not the style but the texture. Then she said my hair was like hers. It was almost like she didn't want to give me a full compliment. She was approving in one area but disapproving in another. And she thought she would just keep it real like that. Keep in mind I never asked her what she thought of my hair.

 

[aishasoleil]

I love my hair and could careless what they think but at the same time if they aren't being honest I rather they keep it to themselves.

The bolded is how it should be! If you love your hair, who cares what other people think? As long as you're not strolling into work with a style that is inappropriate for the type of job you have, you shouldn't worry about whether or not a compliment is sincere.

I will add that I am team "if you can't say something nice... LIE!" Okay, I'm kidding... sort of.

 

[Kinkyhairlady]

Sorry, I have to disagree (unless you mean your coworkers).

Lol, yeah I'm talking about my coworkers. Not all white folks.

 

[cocosweet]

Don't know. Don't care. I just say thanks and don't even give it another thought.

 

[pinkchocolatedaisy]

I guess I'm justs head-over-heels smitten with my hair that I just don't give a fudge brownie if they're being sincere or not. JMO

Sent from my SPH-D700

 

[Curlykale]

Lol, yeah I'm talking about my coworkers. Not all white folks.

(lets out a whistle of relief after having investigated it's going to be a peaceful thread without people eating pop corn) lol ;-)))

 

[Nonie]

Though I don't really care all that much, I have pondered a few comments.

Someone will say "I wish my hair could do that!" and then in the next breath talk about how they don't leave the house without flat ironing their wavy/loose curly hair. I'm like hmmm.

@KCcurly, I would just assume they're all thumbs about doing their hair. That if they had your length and your skills they'd do the same. Or that they look ugly w/o their hair straight which is why they have to wear it straight. Call me crazy but I honestly never associate what it is being said about me with what others do or think. I also usually decide for myself if what is said is true or not...then keep it moving. "You like my hair? Me too!" "You don't like it? Pity you!" "You like my messy hair? You're crazy!" In other words, I already decide what's fact. All the other stuff is either an echo of a fact or a person's own problem; nothing to do with me.

Half the time I don't...they may be genuine in saying they like your hair, but I doubt any of them like it enough to want it on their head. jmho

@Nelli04 Why should people want what they admire? I can look at Jessica Alba and think she's absolutely beautiful. But truth be told, I'd not want to wake up tomorrow and be Jessica. Don't want her hair. Don't want her skin. Don't even want her pretty face on me. OK, I'll take her money coz I think she beats me there, but I don't think I'd compliment her on her paycheck. (So see, sometimes we do withhold compliments on stuff we'd like in our lives ) Not sure why we seem to think that "liking/admiring something" = "wanting the same thing for ourselves". Sometimes this can be true: I love Mwedzi's and Sera's hair and yes, I'd want to have their hair on my own head. But I also love long hair like JJJ's but no, I don't want long blond hair at all. Doesn't mean I'm lying when I say I love JJJ's hair. It's beautiful and worthy of my admiration, and my not wanting it doesn't make my admiration of it any less sincere.

ETA: For those who don't know who JJJ is, here you go.