LoveCraze
Naturalista
with my mother. So she reveals to me that she wants to get a texturizer just for her nape and edges. She claims her hair does not look good or polished because her "naps" are showing.
erplexed Let me be clear that I really don't care what one does with their hair, rather it be natural, heat styled,texturized,or relaxed. Do you and be happy with your decision. But I was trying to point out the alternatives to texturizing/relaxing such as continuing with the heat stying or BKTing. She not hearing it. Then she throws in my face (or maybe just brought it up- I'm feeling defensive right now)that my edges aren't like hers so I don't have anything to worry about. She says her nape is just too kinky basically and that my daughter also has the same thing. ALL of this being said in front of my 13 yr old DD. 
This is not acceptable to be speaking of your and her hair in such a negative manner, giving her a complex about it in thinking it's not good enough unless it's straight. I am just really frustrated almost to tears
because it seems the more I try to instill pride and acceptance in my DD for her hair without chemicals, my mom defeats the purpose by making these negative comments. Sorry I'm long winded ya'll. I just needed to vent.
BTW she stopped getting relaxers when I told her I was going natural in 2009. It took a VERY long time for her to accept my kinks. I guess she was thinking I was going to be a straight haired natural which was not my plan.
It also took her a while to aceept that I wanted my DD to stretch her relaxers first and then perhaps faze them out if she chose to. To my surprise, she was ok with that and DD no longer getting them. But not before she already planted the seed that it needs to be straight to look good.
erplexed Let me be clear that I really don't care what one does with their hair, rather it be natural, heat styled,texturized,or relaxed. Do you and be happy with your decision. But I was trying to point out the alternatives to texturizing/relaxing such as continuing with the heat stying or BKTing. She not hearing it. Then she throws in my face (or maybe just brought it up- I'm feeling defensive right now)that my edges aren't like hers so I don't have anything to worry about. She says her nape is just too kinky basically and that my daughter also has the same thing. ALL of this being said in front of my 13 yr old DD. This is not acceptable to be speaking of your and her hair in such a negative manner, giving her a complex about it in thinking it's not good enough unless it's straight. I am just really frustrated almost to tears because it seems the more I try to instill pride and acceptance in my DD for her hair without chemicals, my mom defeats the purpose by making these negative comments. Sorry I'm long winded ya'll. I just needed to vent. BTW she stopped getting relaxers when I told her I was going natural in 2009. It took a VERY long time for her to accept my kinks. I guess she was thinking I was going to be a straight haired natural which was not my plan.
It also took her a while to aceept that I wanted my DD to stretch her relaxers first and then perhaps faze them out if she chose to. To my surprise, she was ok with that and DD no longer getting them. But not before she already planted the seed that it needs to be straight to look good.
, my DH reminded me a while ago that they(mothers) think differently about natural hair due to the time frame in which they were brought up. I ended the convo with her by saying it's her hair and she can do what she wants. I think she believes that I am totally against perming which I'm not. But I know FOR ME and DD, not having one would be the better option. Thanks for commenting.
