Your Mistakes

1) Applying my relaxer myself at home, when I really should've had a professional do it.
2) Waiting more than 6 weeks to get a relaxer, and my hair breaking off as a result.
3) Blow drying my hair atleast 3 times a week.
4) Applying permanent hair color
 
The biggest mistakes I have made when relaxed was intentionally overprocessing my hair. and I wore tracks with the glue in my hair for about 6 years. when I first had them put in, my hair was shoulder length and my hair dried out and broke off and stayed short because I was too embarrased to wear my own hair because it was in such bad shape. My hair got be as short as 1/2 to 1/4 inch all over I didn't even have enough hair to cover my tracks with.
The dumbest thing I have ever done since going natural is combing my hair dry and wonder why I wasn't retaining any lenght.
 
My mistakes were:

1) Blowdrying everyday to style my hair just right.
2) Blowdrying from roots to ends once a week after washing instead of wet-setting (Thank God for the ponytail method!).
3) Combing my hair straight through from the root to the ends. I tap the comb through now.
4) Using greases as hair food.
5) Not using deep conditioning/cholesterol treatments with each wash.
6) Not realizing that true moisture comes from water.
7) Not realizing that relaxed hair is already weak from being relaxed and should be treated with extra care.
8) Not realizing that hair should be treated like silk.
 
in the past.....
curling iron everyday,
gel on dry hair all the time
washed my hair 1x a month like it was ok!!!
i let the dumba$$ beautician use a SUPER on my hair for 2 years (my ends now show the damage, but i'm cuting thos suckers)
i thought pink oil moisturizer made my hair grow...
switching relaxers like every time i got one...
never knowing what the stylist was doing to my hair...
never dep conditioning.. come to think of it i dont think i even attempted to conditon much
letting the B*T*H (sorry if im offending anyone, but that is what she is) comb from root to ends with a fine toothed comb and then she had to nerve to say i had malo pelo (bad hair)
not speaking up for myself

stupid things i've done lately:
never properly combing out hair and wondering why i had horrible tangles
doing things i know my hair hates (like airdrying) in the name of helping it and ending up with major breakage
guilty of underprocessing
going longer than my hair likes w/o a relaxer

i'm finally coming to understand that i cannot DO what everyone else does to their hair and expect the same results. i can take bits and pieces from here and there and try different things, but first i must understand the needs of my hair
 
Imagine with me...

Pulling my WET hair WAAAY back with a hard brush a la the 'chinese eyes' look we all know and love with a RUBBER BAND (like the kind that you use at your office?) while at night, tying it down with a COTTON scarf. BLOWDRYING my SAOKING WET ENDS EVERY morning and THEN using a curling iron to bump the ends (using pink oil to "protect it").

This was my daily routine in highschool - you do the math.....

/images/graemlins/blush.gif
 
Back in the day:
1. Home perming every two weeks... :
2. When I did go to a salon, letting the girl put perm on my ENTIRE head.
3. Getting frustrated during comb-out and RIPPING out my hair
4. NEVER EVER using pomade or oil because it interfered with my white-girl-bouncy-hair. So it was so dry I could SEE it breaking.
5. Conditioner? What for? Just costs extra money at the GROCERY STORE.

Now?
1. Well I cut one side of my hair in an attempt at layers(My stylist said it was fine, doesn't show...)
2. Not always speaking up when the stylist gets rough during comb-out. (I need to speak up EACH/EVERY time, cuz it's MY hair that's being pulled out...)
 
Yes, I'm with you Harlem. Omg, if that old hair could come back, it would whoop our butts. The things we did thinking it was okay.
 
years ago my stylist applied relaxer over perm for my mum, myself and my sister. i am still wondering why none of us went bald after that! really, its amazing. i am even wondering if the danger has been overestimated cos it did not harm our hair one bit. /images/graemlins/confused.gif
 
Maybe our hair is stronger than what we think because all I can say is DAYUM. I rarely used conditioner (never a deep conditioner), products that were heavy and oily to my hair, hair glues and glue everyday. In addition to curling my hair every single day and I managed to keep my hair to my neck in the back.
 
For me...
[*]curling iron everyday on <font color="red">highest</font color> setting
[*]"greezing" my scalp everyday so my hair would grow
[*]washing hair every 1-2 weeks even though my scalp hurt and itched - and smelled
[*]never conditioning my hair
[*]trying to go longer in between relaxers even though my hair is breaking
 
The damage I used to inflict upon my hair never made be bald or had my hair falling out in chunks (thank God!) but before I began relaxing my hair it was ultra thick(I could hardly fit it into a ponytail) and much longer than it ever gets now. The mistreatment probably stopped my hair from reaching its full potential. Now my whole ponytail can be secured with one banana clip. /images/graemlins/frown.gif
 
Getting trims every 8 weeks from a scissor happy person. Never again! /images/graemlins/mad.gif
 
For me, trying to keep up with everything my friends were doing to their hair (cutting, coloring, using too much heat, oh and remember those goddess braids?? I thought I looked so cute with my eyes "slanting" from the tightness)

Actually letting friends or "friends of friends" do my hair.

Hot curling my hair twice (back-to-back), to get that "extra-straight" look.

Knowing that I didn't know how to care for my hair, but being too cheap to maintain my professional care (the guy actually wrote a book, reveiwed here on this board) /images/graemlins/blush.gif.

Being jealous of women with long hair, and then beating myself (and hair) up for not being as "fortunate". /images/graemlins/crazy.gif

Using dollar store hair products.

Not being focused on what I ultimately wanted for my hair, didn't have a clue.

Not knowing that hair care also comes from within (good health &amp; peace of mind).

I love this board and you guys are really helping me- since August (when I discoved the boards), I have been experiencing wonderful progress- Thanks everyone!! /images/graemlins/wink.gif
 
were:
1. allowing a know-it-all stylist to OVER process my hair with highlights.--I was only 18 y/o when I decide I was tried of my naturally highlighted brown hair. She kept that stuff on my hair for a hour----YOUNG AND STUPID.

2. Not taking care of highlighted hair(moisturizing).

3. Leaving my hair unprotected at night.

4. Washing hair once every 2 weeks.

5. Unhealthy dieting---fasting (protein shakes only)

6. And self denial that there was a problem---alot of shedding /images/graemlins/frown.gif

On some days, I actually feel like crying over the damage I allowed to happen to my hair, even though it has improved.
 
Biggest Mistakes/Worst Habits:

1. Me + any heat appliance /images/graemlins/shocked.gif
2. Taking too passive a role with scissor-happy or chemically-negligent stylists /images/graemlins/mad.gif
3. Hair-twirling /images/graemlins/crazy.gif
 
1. Washing hair every 2 weeks
2. Believed no-lye meant less harsh
3. Slapping on 10 different products all at once thinking the more the better
4. Greasing my scalp
5. Believed applying oil meant I was moisturizing my hair
6. The infamous flat iron to smooth the new growth
7. Not using a scarf every night
8. Going to a salon for my 10 o'clock appt and not getting home until 5pm and still have to fix my hair to my liking /images/graemlins/mad.gif
 
when i was younger:

1) greasing my scalp with "super gro" greases sometimes daily, thinking it would make my hair grow, but in the end i only caked my scalp in grease and had a hard time washing it out.
2)Washing infrequently
3)Rarely trimming
4)Using excess heat
5)Not using deep conditioners
6)picking at my hair all the time
7)tight ponytails
8)"Experimenting" with my hair
9)thinking grease and oil was moisture and that water was bad

My hair must be strong like cable wire because with all the abuse i put my hair through the years i still managed to keep a good amount lenght and thickness and i thank God for that all the time.
 
Okay, ya'll don't laugh...years ago during my Jeri Curl days, I was in a hair show...and I let this guy cut my hair in a style ...he gave me a cone head cut...I kid you not...I was that stupid to let him cut my hair without asking what he was going to do. I had to wear a wig after that mistake.

Another time I had grown my hair out to bra-strap length by wearing braids for years. I went to the shop and the sister told me she couldn't do anything with my hair and I let her cut it all off. I was so pissed at myself for doing that, but I didn't have to wear a wig to grow that one out.
 
This is a good one:

1. Jumping on every product fad, and not sticking to what worked for me. This was just bad on the pockets, not neccesarily on the hair.

2. Being very lax about moisture when I got my highlights. I became VERY lazy and well, breakage ensued.

3. Once you find a good regime, not sticking to it, even though it is....WORKING!! I guess another bad thing about laziness

4. Trying to devise a new regime that is so involved, I KNOW I won't be able to stick to it. Now I just keep it simple.

5. Not keeping track of products that I didn't like. So I'd go out and buy them AGAIN because someone on a hair board gave it rave reviews. So I think "hm....lemme try again" LOL!
 
I'm embarrassed to say I used to refuse to trim my frazzled ends, and I thought water dried out my scalp. Now in retrospect I'm like, how can PURE MOISTURE dry out the scalp? Why did I think that? But oh well, live and learn. /images/graemlins/wink.gif /images/graemlins/tongue.gif
 
One good nugget of wisdom I got from the Shamboosie book is to never allow someone to cut off all your hair under the guise of 'your hair is damaged and I can't do anything else to it'. A stylist told me that hairdressers resort to this because they're too lazy to treat the hair with what it needs - and I'm sure a major cut means major bucks for them. Nita, I feel your pain because this happened to me before. A major chop from bra strap length 'cause she's too lazy . . . girl, they'd have to arrest me after I opened up a can of whup a** on her!!
 
Using a flat iron several times a week and thinking it wouldn't damage my hair because I was using a heat-protectant.

Putting accessories in my hair too tight.
 
not moisturizing my ends on a daily basis..my hair was dried out!
-also not protecting my hair at night with a satin bonnet or satin pillowcase
 
Using the curling iron too much
not taking care of my ends consistantly
not sticking to my regimen
not sleeping with a satin pillowcase
 
Allowing a braider to put this thick nasty brown gel in my hair when she was doing twists on my hair. Major mistake. I lost 2 inches of hair. My hair became super dry. Never again.
 
1. Not wearing satin cap at night.
2. Wearing hair down too often.
3. Not using a moisturizer on my ends.
4. Using too much force and not enough patience when
combing out my tangles.
5. Not giving my hair the attention it needed.
 
OOH Child, back in the day when I was in the military I let this guy in my company put a no-lye relaxer in my hair right after I took my braids out that had been in over 2 months
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anyway he was like girl I use to do hair before I came in the army i can "hook you up" me being in my early twenties didn't know the slightest thing about haircare said OKAY!!!
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to make a long story short he slap the relaxer on comb through to the ends over and over again until the stuff had melted into my hair combing out the knots and all from the braids then after that he said to leave it on for 45 minutes..........MY HAIR WAS JACKED THE_____UP I wanted to shoot him lol(now) I should have known better this is the same guy that said he was a pychic
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so I ran back to the braids which is another story in itself, btw he went home on leave and NEVER came back can we say AWOL, he was a joke, and I was a fool
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we live and learn thank God.

him being a pychic and all, he could have warned me
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What a fabulous post!!!

Here are my mistakes *Before LHCF*::D I:

1. Tolerated lazy, unorganized, incompetent stylists to do my hair, b/c I believed I did not have a choice, because they knew me, and because I was afraid to make a change. As a result, I was not assertive, for ferar the stylist would ask me to go elsewhere. Boy, am I vocal now!

2. Did not pay attention to my hair, and thus providing it with what it needed.

3. Did not understand the physiology of hair.

4. Did not understand that relaxed hair is "damaged" hair, due to the harsh chemical process a relaxer inflicts upon hair, and that it requires "damaged" hair care.

5. Denied the times that my hair was in trouble - i.e. the time my mother commented on my thin, ragged ends following a highlighting treatment. Mind you, the highlighting treatment was done the day of the relaxer - and I allowed this to be done to my hair two times!

6. Did not deep condition following each shampoo using a moisturizing trearment

7. Did not use a protein reconstructor - frankly, I did not know what these were.

8. Used the wrong products for my hair type. Again, I was in denial that my hair was dry, "damaged", etc.

9. Allowed my former stylist to do a major chop following each relaxer touch-up, as opposed to insisting on a trim, and allowing him to use a blow dryer and round brush to dry my hair, rather than insisting on a roller set under the hood dryer.

10. Believed that my scalp did not need grease. My hair and scalp do need and benefit from the use of grease, despite what many experts and posters say.

11. Washed my hair when I was too tired, or when I did not have the proper amount of time to do what I needed to do with my hair. Result: rushing with the comb out, and not paying attention to what I was doing.

12. Did not moisturize the ends.

13. Did not roll/tie up my hair at night, every night.

14. Allowed my former stylist to underprocess a section of hair at the crown, because he said that would minimize the damage. After four years, his "method" caused that area to go from short hair to an almost bald, and very thin spot, so that I had to do a "comb-over", as my students call it.

15. I stopped taking a multi-vitamin, believing it was partially responsible for my 50 lb. weight gain. Incidentally, I lost the weight.

What I do now:

1. Pay attention to the feel and appearance of my hair, then determine what is lacking.

2. Use the proper products for my hair's needs, and for the technique, i.e. a heat protectant if I blow dry.

3. Rollup/tie up my hair each night, covered with a silk cap.

4. Deep condition with a moisturizing treatment each week, with heat.

5. Use a clarifying shampoo every other week.

6. Use a protein reconstructor once a relaxer cycle.

7. I take a multi-vitamin daily, as well as 1,000 mg. of Ester Vitamin C.

8. I changed stylists. Now, I get a roller set with each touch-up.

9. I do wet roller sets at home, with an occasional blow-dry closer to touch-up time.

10. I made an investment in quality products and tools for my hair.

11. I allow ample time to wash/condition/style my hair.

12. I continue to apply grease to scalp. However, I changed products.

And still, in spite of the changes, I:

1. Pick/play at my hair. I need to leave my hair alone, and find things to do when I begin to do this.

2. Use a straightening comb as touch-up time approaches. I know this is a no-no.
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However, I did purchase a serum yesterday, and it made a real difference. I think I can make it to touch up time now without resorting to the combs. I think I will give the combs to my mother. She presses her hair.:)

3. I need to become more diligent and consistent with caring for my ends. However, I still have not found a product I like for this purpose.

That's it. I tried to be honest.
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northernbelle
 
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