Why don't loser men have a problem finding love?

[barbiesocialite]

Every time you post its so much wisdom your DD is lucky to have such a wise mother.

 

[Layluh]

Seriously hopeful you can make some good money online with your wisdom. The world is desperate for wisdom like this.

 

[Layluh]

Thanks for the responses ladies. This reminds me of a conversation I had recently with a Caucasian friend from college. I was telling her about my marriage and she gave me the example of Aladdin and Jasmine as to why I shouldn't have left my husband. She said that real love knows no dollar signs and now I have paved the way for some other chick to get away with my Prince Aladdin. We call it having standards, but she is calling it missing out on love. Is that a cultural thing? I think there is a difference between being in love with a broke guy who means well (which is what I thought he was), and being in love with a loser with no goals and no ambition. At least Aladdin had a dream and a lamp.

That sounds like media manipulation lol. She tried it though .

 

[ChasingBliss]

Seriously hopeful you can make some good money online with your wisdom. The world is desperate for wisdom like this.

I agree and am grateful she is here doing it for free. Cus I have surely benefited from it over the years. Love ya hopeful

 

[ladysaraii]

Thanks for the responses ladies. This reminds me of a conversation I had recently with a Caucasian friend from college. I was telling her about my marriage and she gave me the example of Aladdin and Jasmine as to why I shouldn't have left my husband. She said that real love knows no dollar signs and now I have paved the way for some other chick to get away with my Prince Aladdin. We call it having standards, but she is calling it missing out on love. Is that a cultural thing? I think there is a difference between being in love with a broke guy who means well (which is what I thought he was), and being in love with a loser with no goals and no ambition. At least Aladdin had a dream and a lamp.

Now I love Disney as much as the next person, but really?

And might I add, Aladdin worked his butt off for Jasmine. And found a way to get money, even if it was by magical means. At the end of the day, he didn't get her until he proved he was worthy of her.

your "friend" is terrible

 

[OhTall1]

I just discovered however that my loser ex-husband is happily with another woman and she is expecting a baby. They live in government housing together. Neither of them work. The only income they get is a little cash from selling their food stamps. Once the baby is born I imagine they will become eligible for cash assistance. A normal person would step back and say that I won but I don't think so. According to his mother (who is the source), he and his new girlfriend are as happy as clams. They have each other and they don't need money or careers. They're probably going to have a few more kids, stay on welfare and live happily ever after.

Ex-MIL is just feeding you the lie she's telling herself. Or she just told you that to make you feel bad for leaving her son, or for being single. I mean, who runs around proudly telling folks this story?

The energy that you're now using to follow your dreams is effort you would've been spending propping up a dead-end, go nowhere relationship if you hadn't ended the marriage. You are winning.

 

[Glib Gurl]

There's not one white friend I know that would give advice like that. NOT ONE.

OR, who would take that advice! How often do we see white women going around having children with broke men with no prospects??? I'll wait....

Why should WE have such low standards.

Ex-MIL is just feeding you the lie she's telling herself. Or she just told you that to make you feel bad for leaving her son, or for being single. I mean, who runs around proudly telling folks this story?

OP, I have to wonder - is your ex-MIL single? Sometimes when an older woman is single, she thinks that having ANY man (even a deadbeat who lives off the system and has no intention of getting off the system) is better than being alone....sort of like the character Savannah's mother in Waiting to Exhale....

 

[caltron]

I'm so happy for you that you got up the strength to leave your loser husband. I can just imagine how hard that was to do. Of course it's going to hurt for now, but a couple of years from now you will feel nothing but relief that you finally cut him loose.

It's really comical that anyone would use the words "welfare" and "happy" in the same sentence. You and your child really lucked out. In time, you won't care one bit about how happy your ex is or isn't.

For now, I wouldn't worry about finding another serious relationship. Just enjoy dating and having men wine and dine you--the way it should be. Something about focusing on finding another relationship sucks all the fun out of it and really makes it harder to find the one you're meant to be with. Just have fun and it's guaranteed that the relationship you want will follow soon.

Finally, just remember one thing about a loser is that once you hook up with one, he's yours FOREVER. No matter how happy your MIL says he is, if you wanted him back, he would happily jump back to you with no hesitation. And you should expect that someday he is going to try to weasel his way back into your arms. I hope by then your heart and your mind will be on the same page and you won't be wooed by him.

 

[okange76]

You know, as much as I had an answer in the first page, I've always wondered how les than fortunate couples find each other so quickly and are so happy together in their misfortune. Lately all the crackheads I see are in couples, holding hands, lovey dovey and whatnot, high as a kite not even sure where they are going but they hold on to each other. Even the drunk homeless people I see on my way to work in the morning are cuddled up together under blankets and newspapers every single day. Couples cuddled together begging and rolling their eyes at people who only give spare change instead of dollar bills.

On the flip side, the people who seem to somehow have their act together cannot seem to find each other. Does anyone have any insight or thoughts about this?

 

[deltagyrl]

How often do we see white women going around having children with broke men with no prospects??? I'll wait....

A WHOLE friggin' lot. I think they recover better but, let's be clear, they are not exempt from making poor life decisions.

 

[caltron]

A WHOLE friggin' lot. I think they recover better but, let's be clear, they are not exempt from making poor life decisions.

Yeah I see it a lot too. Some black men specifically target white women because they think they are easier to manipulate.

 

[CurlyMoo]

I noticed that it's easier for a guy to get a good woman than it is for a woman to get a good man.

 

[DarkJoy]

hey Perfexion I remember your story. Good on you for leaving.

You're not alone. My ex was similar and after I gave his loser shiftless arse the boot he immediately takes up with a mother of 3 children with 3 daddies and 2 divorces under her belt all living on child support and welfare in Sect. 8 housing. Of course 2 of the daddies are MIA as well Whatever. They can have each other.

IDK why its so easy for losers to find each other and stay together. I guess they feel like they are unconditionally in love. And others, like us, have too many rules and standards.