white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me!

[ajoyfuljoy]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

You all are very welcome. It's good to see that others were inspired by it too

 

[thefineprint]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

what a sweet article!

 

[MidBackCrisis]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Man Im loving that article. She seems to be a another member of LHCF

 

[Sweetyb]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

I laughted when I read this part:

The most beautiful thing I have ever seen is when my girls are freshly washed, combed through, and oiled, before I style. I made them walk around like that for a while. I told them I needed a break to cook or something, but really, I just want to see them walk around. They have halos of sheer beauty. Now only my one girl has it. The other is fried and lyed, but she's happy for now. I'm sure it will swing the other way sometime.

I loved the article and her view of her daughter's hair. She comes off as very culturally aware of the different kinky hairtypes there are in the world! I admire the love she has for her daughters.

 

[gmw]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Very good read!!!

 

[Wildchild453]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Can you give the source for this article?

 

[IntelligenceisBeautiful]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

very profound. great article

 

[BrockStar]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Wow...That was really nice...and interesting...not the usual "your hair is so cool and funky" or "can I touch it"...it's so nice to know there are non black people who think so positively of natural black hair in an honest, deep way.

 

[AsTheCurlzTurns]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

I loved this soooo much!!! It was really sweet!! Thanks for posting enlightening article for us!

 

[cmw45]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Good! If only every mother of a black child (especially girls) felt this way.

 

[Cichelle]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

She's gotta be from a hair board cuz she said BSL, 4a, 4b, Big Chop.....

Yup.

This isn't an article. It's a post someone made on another hair forum.

 

[cmesweet]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Ummm this is a reply to one of my threads in another forumerplexed. Are you a member there too??

 

[InNeedofHairapy]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Great article, post, reply, blog...whatever this is

 

[JustKiya]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Ummm this is a reply to one of my threads in another forumerplexed. Are you a member there too??

I KNEW that post looked familiar!!! As wonderful as sharing this was, I have to ask - did you ask the poster if you could pass her post around? *sigh*

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

I KNEW that post looked familiar!!! As wonderful as sharing this was, I have to ask - did you ask the poster if you could pass her post around? *sigh*

My bad you guys, didn't realize there would be anything wrong with this. Thanks for bringing this to my attention.

...waiting for my request for permission to hopefully come back so this thread can be official. I hope this lady will enjoy seeing how her words and wonderful attitude have inspired people she doesn't even know.

 

[BeeSweet]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Hi,

I'm the woman who originally wrote the post over on another hair care site called Long Hair Community. I wrote it in reply to another poster's question, I believe. It wasn't an article or pontification or anything like that, just a post that addressed a few issues related to the original post -- transitioning to natural, I think.

I didn't expect it would generate any kind of interest at all. In fact, I felt bad after posting that it was so long, and rather disjointed. Plus for some reason, I always think that what I say about "black hair" will be laughed at or rejected. I'm probably wrong about that but I am sensitive.

Anyway, I believe I have a lack in my life of people I can talk to about natural hair, so I was so happy to find that 4a thread on the other forum. as a result....I wrote a LOT. The women over there are very cool, and I love the 4A thread gals (I think there's a dude on there, too).

I want to thank you all for responding positively to my post.

To address a few questions that came up: no I did not belong to your forum, although I do now. It is a forum rich with information and good folks. I though about joining before, but wasn't sure if I would be well-received. I did join another AA natural one a few years back when I was struggling with my "kinkier" daughter's dislike of her hair. Unfortunately, I didn't feel welcome at all, so I left.

I do use terminology commonly found on hair sites and in books-- big chop, TWA, no-poo. I have been into hair for a while. I love natural hair care for my whole family.
To address the lady who said I was a little "off" about clumping racial groups together by hair -- I didn't mean it to come out that way.
I know a lot of people across a lot of racial groups and EVERYBODY has different hair. Because that thing was a forum post, and not an article, it wasn't honed, and came across as a generalization. So sorry.

Anyway, I've joined here now. I'm not the greatest styler in the world, but I am good at hair care.... and there's always more to learn. It doesn't matter what kind of hair you have or where you are from -- natural hair care is like gardening -- hands on, needs the right mix of things, patience, experimentation, and love.

This all came about from wanting to help my kids love their hair, because they did get information from others that black hair is "bad hair." I thought it would be cool to get Ebony mag, but I hated it because there was so much weave and so many relaxer ads, that I stopped. We've gotten stopped in the street by women who felt led to tell me my kids natural hair needed to be taken care of, and I should be ashamed of myself. My girls have heard unsolicited opinions of their hair by relatives and strangers who proclaimed one daughter's hair "good hair" and the other's "bad hair."
And don't even get me started on stupid things well-meaning white people say. That's a whole other post.
So the love needed to come from home. Home is the origin of most things our children learn and take with them when they grow up, so what we teach them better be loving and wise and good.
The secret of AA hair is this: there's nothing not to love. It just takes extra time to style, but this can be used wisely as healing down time, meditation time, bonding time, etc... I hope to contribute on this forum if I can, and to, as always, keep learning.

Thanks for not bashing my post!

 

[anon123]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Welcome!

Hi,

I thought it would be cool to get Ebony mag, but I hated it because there was so much weave and so many relaxer ads, that I stopped.

I just wanted to let you know about a natural hair magazine
http://www.hightexturemag.com/

I've only bought one copy, I think it was the premiere issue. I bought it as a pdf, but I think you can buy a hard copy for $1 extra, if I'm remembering right. It had lots of pictures and very basic tutorials, a couple of articles. I didn't repurchase because I don't need it and the tutorials weren't explicit enough for me to do anything, but if you want a magazine that celebrates natural black hair and has nice images for your daughters to look at, you might be interested in it.

 

[BroadstreetBully]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Welcome BeeSweet!

I really enjoyed your post and I'm SO happy to see mothers teaching their daughters to love their hair.

I've seen the bonding between mothers and black daughters over natural hair. Our natural hair is beautiful and unique, and it's often a struggle for black girls to learn to accept the beauty of their hair for what it is.

It shames me when black mothers subconsciously teach their daughters that their hair is a curse or burden. Apparently our hair is unmanageable, and black daughters begin to feel like their hair is too much work for their mothers. It shouldn't be like that. But in the hustle and bustle of modern society, unfortunately this sentiment is far too common.

It's great to see a mother bonding with her daughters over hair. It's also nice to see you support their decisions with their hair as well. Kudos to you and welcome to the board once again!

 

[beadedgirl]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

WARM WELCOME TO YA BEE!!!......i hope to read more from you.

 

[Piscesgirl718]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Welcome BeeSweet! The ladies on this forum are great and trust me they know their stuff! I'm sure that you will be well-received. Once again, welcome!

 

[BeeSweet]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Thank you!! You are all great, and you brought tears to my eyes!

I'll check out that mag for sure.

Thanks again.

 

[Christa438]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Welcome BeeSweet! The ladies on this forum are great and trust me they know their stuff! I'm sure that you will be well-received. Once again, welcome!

Welcome to LHCF! as a mother and a forum member, I loved reading both posts.

 

[sheena m]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

WELCOME BEE!!!!!!! I absolutely loved your post and I was actually a little inspired by it. As others have said, it is so good that you appreciate and have taken the time to understand Black hair. I am glad that you are here!

 

[LadyKaypnyc]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Wow, great article! I'm happy she took the time to learn how to properly care for her daughters' hair. Inspiring

 

[tinkat]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Welcome to LHCF BeeSweet!

 

[LadyKaypnyc]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

She sounds like this lady I came across on youtube. She was white but had a black daughter, and was cornrowing her hair in all kinds of beautiful styles (that put me and a lot of others to shame).

She showed that there was absolutely no excuse when it comes to caring for your child's hair even if it is different.

I know exactly who you are referring to...ditto to the bold

 

[Pheonixx]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Hey BEE....
I liked your post and I think it's just FABULOUS that you are trying to teach your daughters the concept of self-love.
You know...these little ones are impressionable. They need that sort of positive reinforcement.

1.

Hi,
This all came about from wanting to help my kids love their hair, because they did get information from others that black hair is "bad hair." I thought it would be cool to get Ebony mag, but I hated it because there was so much weave and so many relaxer ads, that I stopped.

Ugh...If you think that's bad check out a black hair magazine! Just pick one. Page after glossy page of these celebrity sistas and their misleading weaves lying about their 'beauty' routine.
"Well Gina--I DC every 3 days and I make every effort to trim every 6 wks. Some black women want to hang onto dead locks but like my mother always said..."
...and


2. I look at the post and I think, "What's to bash? What's so offesnsive about?"
I see a lot of white women who have black of biracial babies running around like this:
LOL. At least YOU take it in stride and attempt to educate yourself.

But....girl--you know how some black folks are. First they trip because they say white folks are out of touch then when SOME white folks actually try to understand the culture, they STILL wanna trip and nitpick.

It's just best to not allow ppl project their personal issues onto you. Ppl are crazy and who has time for that crap...but I'm sure you understand that.

Anywho--
I'm a newbie myself--but I'm mos def not shy!

 

[LadyKaypnyc]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

WELCOME BEESWEET!!!

 

[LadyKaypnyc]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

Hey BEE....
I liked your post and I think it's just FABULOUS that you are trying to teach your daughters the concept of self-love.
You know...these little ones are impressionable. They need that sort of positive reinforcement.

1.

Ugh...If you think that's bad check out a black hair magazine! Just pick one. Page after glossy page of these celebrity sistas and their misleading weaves lying about their 'beauty' routine.
"Well Gina--I DC every 3 days and I make every effort to trim every 6 wks. Some black women want to hang onto dead locks but like my mother always said..."
...and


2. I look at the post and I think, "What's to bash? What's so offesnsive about?"
I see a lot of white women who have black of biracial babies running around like this:
LOL. At least YOU take it in stride and attempt to educate yourself.

But....girl--you know how some black folks are. First they trip because they say white folks are out of touch then when SOME white folks actually try to understand the culture, they STILL wanna trip and nitpick.

It's just best to not allow ppl project their personal issues onto you. Ppl are crazy and who has time for that crap...but I'm sure you understand that.

Anywho--
I'm a newbie myself--but I'm mos def not shy!

Preach Girl

 

[Diya]

Re: white women's comments about her black daughters' hair (long)...really touched me

welcome beesweet !!

Glad to have you here to learn and grow with us It's so nice to see how you teach your daughters to embrace their natural beauty, and wish there were more mothers out there like you...black, white or whatever!