Mothers and Daughters-Long Post

[CaramelKiss]

My mom and I were talking the other day about our hair and I told her about this board and what all I've been learning and how I stopped using heat blah blah blah and so she said to me, "I told u so! I told u to stop using those curling irons years ago!" Well, I told her that she should stop trying to color her greys and get it done professionally cause she does a terrible job. (she can afford it) She uses Nice and Easy and before when I was in the States, I would help her color her hair. Now she has my brother doing it. I miss my mom. But anyhow, I thought I would ask u ladies some questions about your moms' or daughters' or even grandmothers' hair. U pick.

1. If u could give them hair advice, what would it be?
2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given u?
3. Do u share similiar type hair?
4. What do u have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.
5. Are u jealous of her hair or vice versa?

Okay, I already told u the advice part, so here's the rest:

My mom and I share this same receeding line in the front. I have had it for as long as I can remember

We both have thick wavy, blue-black hair and we both hate our hair color!! Also, our hair tangles a lot.

She never gave me bad advice, but she would sometimes unknowingly take bad advice of friends and relatives who thought they knew something and she would dry brush my hair alot.

The best thing she did was using coconut oils/exotic plant oils from the Indian shore. She would warm it up and put it in my hair and make 1 or 2 ponytails. My hair was shiny and boy was it healthy!!

My mom likes to keep her hair a little above shoulder length which looks great on her and she likes the low maintenance. The longest hers has been was down to her knees. Mine, past my shoulders. Am I jealous of my mom?? Sometimes!

I don't have any daughters

Okay, your turn!!!

edited to add: I guess the oils had an influence because now by brother uses it on his daughter hair. She's only 18 months old!!! LOL

 

[inthestars]

[ QUOTE ]

1. If u could give them hair advice, what would it be?
2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given u?
3. Do u share similiar type hair?
4. What do u have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.
5. Are u jealous of her hair or vice versa?


[/ QUOTE ]

1. As far as advice is concerned, I'd tell her not to hate her hair so much. She worships straight hair no matter how thin or unhealthy looking.

2. My hair 3c and hers is 4B.
3. our hair is different, mine is super thick, hers is regular.
4. She has always commented on how thick my hair is, she always hated combing and caring for it. Her idea of care was slathering it with chemicals and excessive heat.

 

[canuck]

1. nothing really.
2. i wish that she had not relaxed MY hair.
3.my mom has different hair from mine. Hers is 3b/3c(?) - light, fine, curly stuff. Mine is a thick 4a. Dont think that i would want her hair though.
4.nothing at all.
5.NO, her hair is wispy and light, and 'no' she would not want hair like mine as its too 'ethnic'

 

[Daughter]

1. If u could give them hair advice, what would it be?

Nothing really

2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given u?

She was always one for keeping it simple and clean, so I've not had bad avice from her. She always had my hair worn in plaits when I was a child,
3. Do u share similiar type hair?

Mine is thick like hers when it was younger. I have a mix of textures between my mum and dad.

4. What do u have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.

we have thick hair in common, I got grey hairs early (but I'm keepin' mine!) She prefers her hair short. I did too, but I'm going for long hair at this time.

5. Are u jealous of her hair or vice versa?

no, me and my mum are cool and don't envy each other for anything (well, I wish I had her cooking skills!)

 

[CaramelKiss]

Hey Inthestars and Canuck

Thank u both for responding!!

All 3 of us seem to have different hair from our mothers. They having, for lack of a better word, "low maintenance" hair? When I was 12 or so, this neighbor of ours told my mom that I needed a relaxer and this is when relaxers first came out back in the 80's. She voluntereed to do it. It was Dark and Lovely. Well...this woman jacked my hair up!!! My scalp was burning!!! I was sooo pi§§Ed of!!! I didn't know who I wanted to kill first, her or my mom!!! Needless to say this was also the same woman who tried to pierce my ears with a sewing needle when I was younger AND told my mom, no joke!!! That I needed a nose job!!!! LOL Thank goodness my mom didn't follow that piece of advice!!!!

As for my mom, she had good intentions, she just didn't know how to take care of my hair and followed ill advice, most of which came from her family, which was "cut her hair", "keep it short", "it's not short enough"!!! But I wouldn't let anyone cut it above my ears because I would throw a fit and they would get scared. I have an aunt who always saw to it that I had a hair cut when I would go visit her. Well let me tell u, she was astonished when I visited her several years ago and my hair was past shoulder length. She was so surprised and comented on how lovely it look and said she was going to grow hers long, and guess what?? She did!!

 

[CaramelKiss]

Allright, I can see u all readin! U may as well post somethin while u at it!!!!

BUMP!!!!!!!!

 

[Peachtree]

Hey Caramelkiss

1) Hair advice
Yep, all of the time. I care for my mom's hair. I relax, trim, style, poo, condition, etc. (of course for a small fee

). But she has always trusted my hair skills & knowledge, even when I didn't know what the heck I was doing

!

2) Best/worst advice
Best....... don't put any heat in your hair
Worst.... paying for stylist to do my hair. No, they didn't jack it up, but my mom gave them a fortune over the yrs. That money could have been saved.

3) Similar type?
For the longest I thought that we didn't, despite my mom telling me we did. Mom's hair is 3B, relaxed.

4) Common?
Thickness & texture. She likes to keep her hair in a short cut, although she's growing it back to bs now.

5) My mom & I are best friends

. I'm an only child & she still has me spoiled. There's absolutely no jealously between us

. Oh, wait a minute

... I would like to have her growth rate

.

 

[Nacai23]

1. If u could give them hair advice, what would it be?

Don't use chemicals!

2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given u?

Best- Keep the hair moisturized; worst-grease your scalp daily.

3. Do u share similiar type hair?

Nope. My mom has 2b/c and very fine hair that grows like crazy. My grandma is the same as my mom. She's had her hair past her bottom in her younger days. I have 3c and super duper thick hair. When I was younger my hair would snap all those ponytail holders!

4. What do u have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.

Absoultly nothing.

5. Are u jealous of her hair or vice versa?

Sometimes I get jealous of how fast their hair grows. They don't use quality products or take vitamins! and my grandma doesn't take care of her hair and it still grows!

 

[JazzAngel]

This is an interesting topic.

[ QUOTE ]


1. If u could give them hair advice, what would it be?
2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given u?
3. Do u share similiar type hair?
4. What do u have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.
5. Are u jealous of her hair or vice versa?

[/ QUOTE ]

1. My advise to my mother would be to not brush her hair as if she is trying to remove a stane from the carpet. She brushes her hair like a mad women, then complains that her hair is not thick enough. It does not accure to her that if her brush fills up with tons of hair every single day that she needs to treat her hair with respect.

2. The best advise she gave me was to twist my hair at night before bed rather than sleeping with it open. She said that it would grow better and she was right.

3. My mother's hair has loose open curls and I have more course hair with smaller curls that are not as silky as hers.

4. Our hair type is quite differnt.

5. I wish my hair line was as smooth as hers. Her hair is fine and lays straight and smooth around the front and the back. I especially like the way her hair drapes around the nape of her neck. BUT, I think she is jealous of the thickness of my hair. She has said it over and over, but she makes fun of how course my hair is. so I don't know...

 

[Sky]

Oooh I know I hate those " I told you so"

My mom has type 1 hair and I have type 4 so we have nothing in common really by way of hair. Growing up she thought water would make my hair "straight" and was confuseud as to why water wouldnt just "lay it down" . Its actually funny thinking back because she would try so hard.

1. My advice would be to stop cutting her hair.

2. Her best advice is to love my thick beautiful hair, worst is to put water on it to straighten it !

3.Hair types are total opposites

4. Share nothing in common as far as types

5. Growing up I was jealous of how "straight" her hair was she was jealous of how thick mine was and how she couldnt do all the styles I could do.


I never thought much about length until I came to this board! Ya'll got me with a crazy sense of "long" hair

 

[KittenLongPaw]

[ QUOTE ]
1. If u could give them hair advice, what would it be?
2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given u?
3. Do u share similiar type hair?
4. What do u have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.
5. Are u jealous of her hair or vice versa?


[/ QUOTE ]
1. I would tell my mom to stop using heat to style her hair! She blowdrys it, curls it, sprays it with hairspray and colors it.
2. Hmmmmmmm

Well, nothing I can think of. When I was small, she would spray it with Stay Soft Fro, braid it up and be done with it. I used to think that stuff was the worst, but I saw it at a store recently, and it actually looks pretty darn good. No mineral oil, its just like a curl activator I guess. When I used to press my hair and relax it, she was the one who wanted me to be natural.
3. Our hair types are completely opposite. My mom has super fine, thin stick straight 1a hair. It wouldn't hold a curl to save it's life. Mine is fine too, but it is 3c/b and much fuller and thicker.
4. We both have fine hair, and it's about the same length.
5. When I was smaller and wished my hair was straight, I might have been envious. But my mom has always been envious of my hair (not in a bad way). She is always talking about how cute it is and pulling on the curls.

 

[Boadicea]

1. If you could give them hair advice, what would it be?

I've already given my mom useful hair advice. I just wish she'd take it.

2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given you?

I don't think she's ever given me bad hair advice, but the best advice was to leave my hair the heck alone.

3. Do you share similiar type hair?

Not in the least. My hair is medium-thick type 3B/C and hers is very fine type 1A/B.

4. What do you have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.

Gray hair. I'm not even 21 yet but I've had strands of gray hair since I was a baby. Also, our hair color is exactly the same (dark brown mixed with medium and light auburn).

5. Are you jealous of her hair or vice versa?

She still says she wishes her hair was as thick as mine.

 

[prettygirl]

My mother has always hd long hair and now I am taking her advice which is wash at leastonce a week ,let your scalp breath ,and let your hair alone,meaning do not ove comb or brush.She has amzing results so I am taking her advice and see what happens

 

[kookysnkream]

1. Wash with a more moisturizing conditioner. It might help with the dry scalp?
2. Best: Don't use so much heat Worst: Washing your frequently will break your hair (lol)
3. Nooo she has kinky 4b hair probably 4 c
4. We tend to get a dry scalp sometimes but mine is A LOT better after these conditioner washes.
5. No, I'm happy with my hair and she isnt either because she once had long hair herself (her hair is super short now because she prefers the low maintaince)

 

[karezone]

1. Wash and condition more often
2. The worst: Not to wash my hair so much. Once a week is entirely too much. At the most you should wash your hair twice a month.
The Best: If you left it alone it would and hair gel causes breakage.
4. Same hair type
5. different thickness and my hair responds differently to products.

 

[ms_kenesha]

1. If u could give them hair advice, what would it be?
To stop heat styling, to stop relaxing (she's now texturizing and cut it all really short because it was breaking and thinning) to not brush and comb her hair so dayum hard (when she asks me to do it, she always says you don't have to be so gentle I'm not a doll I'm not going to break, no but her hair sure as heck does!)

2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given u?
Best: ????
Worst: Grease your scalp, don't wash your hair so much you're not white, do something with your hair (meaning hot curl it or something)

3. Do u share similiar type hair?
No, she has thin hair and it's less coarse than mine.

4. What do u have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.
Nada.

5. Are u jealous of her hair or vice versa?
She's jealous of my length and thickness. I once wished I had her texture, I don't know who's hair texture I got my dad is a 3B and my mom is 3C/4A and I'm a firm 4A/B.

 

[ThursdayGirl]

Wow... Ms. Kenesha I was looking at your hair pics... your hair grows FAST! It looks nice too!

 

[ms_kenesha]

Thanks Thursdaygirl. Lately so many people have been telling me that my hair has been growing so fast, I guess it always has but it really used to break as fast as it grew.

One time my hair actually broke into a style

I can laugh at that now, but then it was sad. Also, since I've stopped getting my hair "trimmed" everytime I get a touch-up mysteriously my hair is now growing!

That's why it really pisses me off when I read in magazines to get your hair trimmed every touch-up because usually the hairdresser is simply cutting all your progress away.

I'd only recommend that if you want to keep the same length and style for the rest of your life.

More pics as soon as I have some dough to get my film developed.

 

[ngaa]

1. If u could give them hair advice, what would it be?
nothin really coz the things that she told me growin up r some of the things i'm findin out here

2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given u?
worst i cant think of but best was about conditionin and not messin with my hair 24/7

3. Do u share similiar type hair?
yeh we're both 4a/b/c's not sure which one

4. What do u have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.
everything really except length now coz i've recently cut my hair.

5. Are u jealous of her hair or vice versa?
yeh she keeps cuttin her hair to shoulder length coz she dont lik the hassle of longer hair and i wish myhair was s dense as hers is coz she has a whole lotta hair

 

[Tracy]

1. If u could give them hair advice, what would it be?

To LOVE her hair. She has beautiful long, thick, natural hair. She keeps wanting my hair and I want hers. We're just all in love with eachother....

But my Mom really doesn't think she's as pretty as me - hair and all. But I think that whatever good genes I do have are attributable to her....I look in the mirror and I see my Mom. It's the ONE THING that makes me feel beautiful. To know I look like her. She is insecure about her hair and it's bigness and how THERE it is. I love it. I'd tell her to embrace her hair. It (and she) is SO beautiful.

2. What's the best/worst hair advice have they given u?
The best advice? KEEP IT SIMPLE. If I could just get this down I'd be set - in a myriad of areas.

3. Do u share similiar type hair?
She's a 4a (I think) and I'm a 3c (I think). but we both have dense hair, smaller strands - but a TON of them. Hers is thicker than mine.

4. What do u have in common hair wise? i.e. thick, thin, length etc.
Mostly density. And her hair is BIG. Mine used to be that way when I was small.

5. Are u jealous of her hair or vice versa?
I am SO jealous of my Mom's hair. She's jealous of mine - but in good ways only. No backhanded comments. No hating on eachother. I loooove her hair and she loooves mine.

 

[JazzAngel]

[ QUOTE ]
We're just all in love with eachother....

[/ QUOTE ]

I just love your post. I could feel your energy coming out of your words. Well you both are lucky to have each other.

 

[Lindy]

1. If you could give them hair advice what would it be?

To stop being so afraid of water (she washes only once every two weeks). To stop relaxing her hair, cuz it doesn't need it!! She's about a type 2a/b. She just has always relaxed and can't stop.

2. Best/worst hair advice she's given?

Worst: To grease my scalp (for me that equals an itchy, flaky scalp)
Best: ?????

(She's not very knowledgable about hair!!!)

3. Do you share similar type hair? What do u have in common hairwise?

Hers is a 2 a/b, mine is a 3c, but we both have very fine strands. Her hair is thinner though she probably would say it isn't!!

I think I did get the "thin-ness" of my hair from her though!!!

4. Are you jealous of her hair or vice versa?

No, not really, but if I had her hair I would never relax it!! She is kind of envious now of my length (hers has never been longer than about shoulder length or slightly beyond), but it's all good; we're best friends so we don't compete on hair matters. I love sharing with her all the tips I've learned on this forum

!!!! She's really happy for me that my hair is growing & is now longer than it's ever been

!!