Southernbella, I understand where you're coming from and wanted to just add another dimension to your argument. I think that there's a tendency to view Blacks from a deficit paradigm as opposed to an assets perspective, and it's a proclivity that we all have either internalized and remain unaware of it or battled against. I personally appreciate the threads you post with the statistics as well as the threads about our achievements. I never got the impression that they were done with the White man as our standard. Rather, I felt that the threads were essential to allowing ourselves to view us and our situation through a different pair of eyes.
I would be remiss if I didn't state one more thing, though, which is my tremendous respect for Sunshine and her attempts to contextualize a lot of the statistical data that's posted in these types of threads. People may not agree with her, but her insights are quite thoughtful and valuable. I will say that I didn't necessarily agree with her argument that you were creating comparative race threads. However, I see more similarities than differences between you two with respect to the way that you ladies approach research about Blacks in this country. This is where Gymfreak's argument comes in: yes, I agree that one needs to balance information received against other reports. But why was it that no one cited the rise of the Black middle class, with an associated acceptance of mainstream values (one of which is marriage) as a possible reason for lower divorce rates among Blacks? Why did no one mention the profound impact of the Black Church (which has both positives and negatives, truth be told) in influencing constructions of marriage in the Black community? Why did no one talk about the fact that as a people, we're used to a level of perseverance that has been historically absent amongst some of our other ethnic counterparts and its implications on the divorce rates among Blacks? By the way, what do divorce rates have to do with marriage rates - they're mutually exclusive! To me, what I saw was that in an effort to make sense of the observed phenomenon of White women having higher divorce rates, we cited rather disheartening information about Black women being less likely to leave because they perceive less Black men out there, or of Black women being more likely to stay in dysfunctional relationships. Here's the crux of my argument: everything I mentioned could play a role, but what was predominantly discussed? Why is it that acknowledging positive factors are considered burying one's head in the sand? Isn't it truly burying one's head when only one side is considered in isolation of the other?
Anyway, that's my food for thought. But again, to you Sunshine, and to all of the researchers-in-training that I know of, like Gymfreak and Mena and Atlchica and a host of other people I've been privileged to meet in this forum: it makes me proud to think of the fact that one day we'll be colleagues and that people like us can help shape the very nature of empirical research on Blacks. I know that this thread was about divorce rates among White women, but I'm taking away a lot more than that.
Are you saying that if you're gonna talk about it then be about it?
Well, lets trying to stop pinpoint how many do and figure out the reasons why. Whats really going on here that Americans cannot savor love? Does it really leave a bitter taste in our mouths?
