I remember in a thread about a year ago, I professed that I never intended on going natural. I have since changed my mind.
I said this once upon a time ago myself. It'll be three years next month since I last had a relaxer.
Can you share your experience with me? Were you scared too? Were you pleasantly surprised or did your hair disappoint you?
I want to hear the good, the bad and the ugly.
I know this is long but I hope this helps you with your decision.
I never really decided that I wanted to go natural and consciously transitioned so maybe that's why I didn't get that initial shock. I never felt scared. What happened was I started stretching my relaxers because I was in school and couldn't get it done on a regular basis. I wore mostly half wigs, braids, buns, etc. I didn't really manipulate my hair much. I would wash and DC it once a week and let it airdry and then put it away. I didn't really have any problems dealing with the two textures so I just kept going with it as long as I could. So I went from 8 weeks, to 10, to 12, to 16, and before I knew it I was at 22 weeks (about 6 months). I caved at 6 months the first time because my mom offered to pay for me to get my hair done for Easter so I let the Dominicans relax my hair. It turned out fine but afterward I wished I would have just let them blow it out for $22 and pocketed the rest of the money
. That was my last relaxer.
I wore my hair mostly in a wash and go styled weave for the rest of the summer and by then my texture started to show through (I had scab hair new growth a few times when I stretched. I remember trying to tame beady bead edges quite a few times but I didn't have that problem later on and don't now.) so I just rolled with it. I got braids once the summer was over and didn't like them so I took them out after like 4 weeks. I had no clue what to do with my hair at that point so I just went into my bathroom with some scissors and before I knew it my hair was on the floor. I BCed after I reached about 5.5 months post relaxer and I haven't looked back since.
I will honestly say this - it was never something that I thought I would do. The thought did cross my mind a few times but I never felt like HEY I WANT TO GO NATURAL
plus I wasn't even 18 at the time so I didn't really have a say in what happened to my hair because I wasn't paying for it's upkeep. There also weren't many people around me that were natural so I didn't see it as a viable option. I was on a college campus and only saw maybe a handful but that was almost 7 years ago so I'm sure there are a lot more naturals now.
If I had thought about it, I would have kept my hair braided all 4 years and transitioned like that until graduation. But my 2nd semester of my freshman year I had braids done with cheap synthetic hair (via my cousin.now I know better) and they ate 2 years worth of progress up. I had my hair cut my junior year of high school into a short cut with the back tapered and it had grown out nicely to past my shoulder with bi-weekly hair appointments. I wore a sew in weave most of my first semester with no problems. I think I took it out and relaxed around Thanksgiving.
I think after having to lose all that hair and then continously having problems with my hair for maybe the next 2-3 years from multiple stylists trying to put their hands in it and correct the damage and overprocessing from using different perms, techniques, corrective relaxers, etc. (my stylist had went out on maternity leave and I was left to bounce around until I found somebody I liked) it was pretty much a hot a$$ mess and I was fed up. It did turn around the last year once I started taking care of it myself but by then I was over it so I cut it all off. I wanted to start over fresh.
My hair has pleasantly surprised me and as it grows out I learn new things about it at each stage. It doesn't look the way I envisioned but as it gets longer it's changing. I have not had any problems with maintaining it. My routine is not that much different than my relaxed hair was. I still wash, deep condition and air dry once a week. I still use a lot of the same products. It's much easier to handle than I initially thought it would be. My hair isn't long yet, so I may retract that statement at a later date.
But for the most part, it has been a breeze.
I have thought about texturizing/relaxing here and there mainly because I'm at an awkward length and it seems the longer my hair gets, the more it shrinks. Most people end up returning to relaxing because of knots, and tangles as well as shrinkage but I rarely get knots and tangles. I have since learned ways to manipulate it to minimize shrinkage and that has curbed my thoughts about relaxing. That's the only real issue I have. I do hate that my hair is thin/fine but there's nothing I can do about that. It's in my genes.
I will admit that styling can be a pain sometimes. Some styles can be a long drawn out process if you don't want to use heat or sit under the dryer. I recently started blowdrying because sometimes could take me all day to wash, dc, twist it so it can dry stretched out, wait for it to dry, then retwist or rebraid to set my style, then wait for it to dry in the set, then take it out and style it finally. I will admit that gets on my nerves sometimes. So I don't wear those styles that often. If I had it my way my hair would be in a wet bun everyday but it's not long enough yet without adding hair. Sometimes I don't have time to do all that. But I honestly believe when it gets longer that's how it will end up everyday.