What Should I Tell Him???

[dark_lovely]

I have this guy friend who is really hung up over a girl who he's been dating roughly 5 -6 months. They did the whole unofficial relationship thing. I personally think that's where he messed up. I don’t agree with the idea of acting like you’re in a relationship its either we are or were not, this is real life we don’t get dress rehearsals. He’s admitted that he cares more about her than she cares about him. His perspective of their relationship is that everything was going well but she told him when they first started messing around she didn’t want a relationship. She basically is the type of female who has always been in a relationship and never had “ME” time and I don’t blame her I feel like I'm in that same boat. So she told him she needs a year away from men to be by herself but she still sees a future for them. I understand that trying to take a year away from being involved with guys and dating/sex I’m doing the same thing, but I came across someone I thought was worth it they hiatus would immediately. Me personally I’m a hopeless romantic and its like what wouldn’t I do if I thought I found the right guy. They recently spoke and she basically cut him out of her life he devastated because he feels he was so good to her and everyone told her how lucky she was to have a guy who cares for like he does. He told me how she said really intimate things about having a future with him and cant fathom how all this changed in a manner of weeks. I repeatedly told him that she was honest from the jump about being in a relationship but he simply decided to ignore her. He found that she plans on hanging out with a male friend who has feelings for her because she getting lonely. Also she told her friend that she wants to start her life over b/c things are so complicated and hopefully she finds her dream guy. Could it be he’s a good guy but she doesn’t feel like he’s the right guy for her? So, basically he love-sick and asking me for advice, what should I tell him?

I don’t want to give him false hope and I’m not sure if I’m being too optimistic because I care about him a lot?

 

[aribell]

It's hard. You should tell him to begin looking for other women to pursue and don't hold out hope for this one. Well, maybe you don't have to tell him not to hold out hope, but do tell him he needs to move on if he's been explicit about what he wants from her and she declined. Was he actually clear with her about what he wanted?

 

[dark_lovely]

thanks, it hard to give him advice the situtaion seems so confusing

 

[Jazala]

She cut him out of her life and now wants to hang with a different guy? No confusion there. She's just not into your friend. He should cease all contact with her and move on.

 

[ThickHair]

She's just not into him. Plain and simple.

 

[weaveologist]

She just doesn't like him. Whether you want to be in a relationship or not, when you think somebody is "the one", you jump on it. PERIOD.

 

[awhyley]

You should tell him what he ALREADY knows. He needs to quit playing himself and find someone else.

 

[LilMissRed]

I agree with all of the above.. he needs to keep it moving