Thanks for the post
ndidirod! Great feedback so far ladies! I've definitely struggled (& still sometimes struggle) with having a fruitful prayer life. I grew up as a PK and prayer was always very formal in my household...so I thought that how all prayer should be. But it doesn't have to be a big production or some eloquent speech to God with just the right words to be heard by Him. It is simply a conversation. When I reframed how I thought about prayer, I wasn't as fearful of it. For me, it is means honest communication with God. I don't have to be on my knees (sometimes I am), it doesn't have to be said out loud, and it doesn't have to be for extended periods of time. In the past, those were excuses I used to use not to pray. Now I may be in my car driving for ten minutes and have a silent convo with God...I can be working out, it doesn't matter where I am. I just need to be connected to Him constantly. I didn't really get that concept until I several years ago even though I was born and raised in the church
I guess I got it when I was ready
When I was going through tough times, my spiritual mentors advised me to always keep talking to God, no matter what. I thought it was disrespectful to talk to God in a casual way or even feel angry with Him, but they told me to honestly express my feelings to Him (He knows what I am thinking anyway
) and always keep talking to Him no matter the circumstance. And it has helped me grow tremendously in my spiritual walk! When I am disappointed and upset, I tell Him about it...if I feel like He isn't giving me what I need (a job, dependable friends, a husband
), I express that and ask Him to change my outlook, give me a right attitude (centered in gratitude) and please help me to fully submit to His will. It is a constant battle because sometimes I still want control over my own life, but praying for guidance helps in that arena
I am striving to get to the place where I only desire God's will for my life and I simply trust He will take care of me, no questions asked. Not there yet, but I am much closer than I used to be
And I heard something that really touched my spirit years ago "God only has two answers for His children: Yes or I have something better in mind for you"
In my experience, His "no" was really a yes to something much greater in my life, beyond what I could even think to ask for...when I think on that, it keeps everything in perspective
ETA: Sorry for the long post