What is the best perm/relaxer for coarse hair?!

D

dwsplaymate

New Member
I really, really need your help. I am the only one in my entire family with hair like this. Before my hair was relaxed my natural hair was nappy mixed with curls, but the curls were little, my natural hair is best described as 'spongey', which is how it looked and felt and if you pulled a curl out it would spring right back into place once you let go. People have told me that this is why perms and relaxers don't get my hair straight, because they are designed to straighten 'regular nappy hair', where as my hair was a different type of nappy. I got a perm 5 days ago and already my hair is so nappy that I cannot do anything with it, it is puffy and doesn't look groomed. I cannot wear my hair natural because it is a mass of thick hair that is completly unmanageable. I'm tired of this. When I've complained before, people have accused me of hating black hair, when in fact I just do not like MY hair type. If my hair was just regular then it would be able to get straight like everyone elses and look presentable. If you all don't have any suggestions, then my only other option is to wear a wig. I need help. Maybe I am lost because I live in a small town that is way behind the times in hair care. Why can't my hair get straight and last? Is there a relaxer out there that will get my hair type straight? Also are there any type of other chemicals that will get my hair straight besides a perm, I've heard of different things that African-Americans put in their hair to get it straight that aren't relaxers. What should I do? Any suggestions??? please.
 
maybe who ever's applying your relaxer isnt doing a good job of smoothing it in enough. sounds like you have regular 4 a/b hair. maybe you could try using an extra strength relaxer or leaving it in for a little bit longer than usual if you want the bone straight look. you could also try a wet rollerset to smooth it out.
 
Even my friends with 4b hair will get a perm, and the bone straight looks lasts on them forever, where as I only get the look for 5 days if I'm lucky. I'm so tired of this I'm bout ready to cut all of my hair off and start with a new chemical of some sort. btw, i love that lil Michael Jackson. lol.
 
Ok ... lol ... i have hair that has a mix of ur type of hair ... umm maybe that perm u used was too mild or did not stay in ur hair long enough to straighten it out. Ive been to places where perms stay in for around 25 minutes (which i find is loong time). tell me a bit more on how the perming-process went.

My hair is currently natural I either straighten it with an iron or go to the hairdresser(dominicaine lady) to have it blown out straight(set in rollers first). I have not permed my hair in over a year now and I have no probs. I actually prefer it better. I strongly advice that you try gettig it blow dried proffessionally. When i get mines down it looks like i was born with straight hair and it really has a nice flow and soft feeling to it.
 
Ok ... lol ... i have hair that has a mix of ur type of hair ... umm maybe that perm u used was too mild or did not stay in ur hair long enough to straighten it out. Ive been to places where perms stay in for around 25 minutes (which i find is loong time). tell me a bit more on how the perming-process went.

My hair is currently natural I either straighten it with an iron or go to the hairdresser(dominicaine lady) to have it blown out straight(set in rollers first). I have not permed my hair in over a year now and I have no probs. I actually prefer it better. I strongly advice that you try gettig it blow dried proffessionally. When i get mines down it looks like i was born with straight hair and it really has a nice flow and soft feeling to it.

Maybe whoever did ur hair doesnt really know how to handle it or doesnt have alot of experience with that type of hair.
 
thank you blazn. Everyone I go to leaves the perm setting for about 10 minutes or 12 minutes. Last month I did argue with my stylist for putting a mild Mizani perm in, but she said that is all black people need is a mild. I tried telling her that a mild perm is definitely, definitley, not going to work on my hair. She put the mild in anyway and needless to say I was looking a mess. 5 days ago, I'm not sure what type she put in, whether it was regular or strong, but I know it was a Mizani and my hair is already nappy. Maybe she just put a regular in.

Anyhow, does anyone know the name of the chemical that naturals put in that gives them the Jada Pinkett look, and also what is the chemical that permies such as Janet Jackson use? I forgot the name of both, but I heard they're great.
 
Due to my experience and what I've heard I actually believe that mild relaxers work better with coarse hair. My hair straightens very easily with mizani sensitive scalp. However this is a no-lye relaxer and was very drying. Mild lye relaxers don't do the job for me so I now use it to texturize (just slightly soften) but mizani sensitive scalp straightens quickly and painlessly. I am mostly 4b with some 4a and am now texturized/relaxed.
 
I don't think you have 4b hair. Like you said earlier your 4b friends hair stays straight. I too beleive that 4b hair is easy to break down with a relaxer. I think if you have resistant hair, I think you need to use No-Lye. It is more drying though but it is "stronger" than the corresponding lye strengths. However, what I really think you should do is rollerset your hair to get it straight. There is no reason when 4a/4b naturals can get their hair rollerset and come out with a straight look that someone who has had a relaxer can't get the same. So basically keep on hunting until you can find a decent hairdresser.
 
Re: What is the best perm/relaxer for coarse hair?

It sounds as though they under processed your hair. If your hair is that porous then you need to leave it on at LEAST 20 minutes but no more then 30. Smoothing your relax after applying it will also play a big factor. You may have to learn to do your hair yourself, no one knows how it will reacte like you. So learn as much as you can on the Forum and take the plunge. I'm sure you will come out more satisfied.
 
Re: What is the best perm/relaxer for coarse hair?

I agree with what the others are saying. No-lye relaxers are stronger than lye so try that and leave it on a little bit longer. I wouldn't suggest applying chemicals yourself since you're already having trouble with professional help. Also, like someone stated earlier, try a rollerset. There isn't a reason why the naturals on here can get there hair straight and you can't with a relaxer.

My hair has been compared to wire
perplexed.gif
in the past so I know how you feel. I live in a small town too, so maybe you could find a stylist in a city near you. What also help with making my new growth softer and more managable was using WGO and Jane Carter's Nourish & Shine. Any product that softens your new growth will eventually have an effect on your hair texture.
 
Re: What is the best perm/relaxer for coarse hair?

What exactly are no-lye relaxers? What are the names of them, and where can I order them? Also, how does a roller set get your hair straight? Is this some type of new technique or something? I know me and my family used to get 'roller sets' in the 90s but just to get shirley temple curls since they were in style. Is that the same thing? Can somebody fill me in? And is there a way I can do the roller sets at home?
 
Re: What is the best perm/relaxer for coarse hair?

Most relaxers come in Lye and no lye formulations. The no lye ones are usually in a kit. The rollers used are large magnetic rollers and so you don't end up with shirley temple curls.
 
Re: What is the best perm/relaxer for coarse hair?

Does anyone know where I can buy these rollers? And are they called magnetic rollers. . .
 
Re: What is the best perm/relaxer for coarse hair?

If you're going to do a relaxer and are getting the results you are getting, you need to do a strand test to determine how long to leave it on and which strength to use.

Also, just because your hair isn't relaxing, doesn't mean it is coarse. It could just be non-porous. Porous hair will relax more easily. My hair is non-porous and medium textured and is VERY resistant to relaxing. If your hair is like mine and they used a mild for 10 or 12 minutes, I can see why it didn't work. It wouldn't do much for my hair either.

Do a strand test on the various sections of your hair.

Also, you can get rollers to roller set at Sally's Beauty supply store or most any other beauty supply store. You will need a hooded dryer as well.
 
Re: What is the best perm/relaxer for coarse hair?

I'd like to ask if your stylist is doing a strand test before she rinses out the relaxer?

My most recent relaxed regular stylist would apply the relaxer to my hair (Vitale Sensitive Scalp) and then just let it sit there...with checking hair strands every 3-5 minutes to see if the wave had gotten loose enough. Then, she'd wash. I'd typically have the relaxer on for about 20-25 minutes. I don't think my hair was resistent in the same way as yours but my waves were very strong-willed waves and I always had stylists say they were struggling to straighten them out. Unfortunately, I did end up with bone straight relaxed hair after a while b/c the sensitive scalp relaxers have to sit on longer to work and then they work too well.

So, I guess my suggestion is to try a sensitive scalp relaxer like Vitale b/c it won't burn (not much anyway) and you can keep it on longer safely. And also make sure your stylist is doing a strand test. If they aren't doing a strand test, then they should be applying the relaxer and then going back through your hair a second time to smooth it and make sure they are straightening the hair. Because yes, what is the point of going through the trouble of relaxing if you aren't getting the effect you want?

Good luck to you.
 
Re: What is the best perm/relaxer for coarse hair?

I also wanted to say in response to CurlyCrly,

When I got my first virgin relaxer...it did not take. And I swear, it really did not take for another 2 years! I was always going to the salon to get my touchups and coming out of there wondering why my hair still was superthick and crappy looking. What a waste.

Point --> Don't feel alone. A lot of us go through this whether it is long-lived or short-lived. The key for me was finding the RIGHT stylist who knew what they were doing and the RIGHT relaxer for my hair type which for me was a sensitive scalp one b/c I burned easily. If you see someone with nice hair, ask them where they go their hair done. Ask as many questions as you can. Tell them your previous experiences!

Again - good luck!
 
Good question was raised! This is still helpful information. We need to go back to doing strand tests! Stylists and DIYers!
 
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