What do you consider cheating, exactly?

[grow_N_Him09]

Last night I found out my bf of 9 mos has been playing Words with Friends with a girl from his past who he had a major crush on. I saw the notification on his phone and first thing he says is she invited him. Later said the game has been going on for a few days. I'm upset because he's a gamer and I know the high potential of making a deeper connection that way. Not to mention, it's concerning that he wouldn't tell me about it. Especially since we have talked about female friends in the past. He's had one contact him and he nipped it in the bud. But it seems he entertained this one.

Do you think cheating is just full-blown sex or does it include things/activities that can lead up to it?

 

[HAIRapy]

Cheating is anything that you can't do in front of your SO without repercussion.

 

[RocStar]

I think everyone has their own definition for cheating or what they consider cheating. However, lying is easy to define.

I do not know the game "words with friends" so I don't know what that entails, but if it were me, I would maybe be upset with the lying (or the lack of sharing information) more than him playing this game with her.

Heck, I don't know. I don't know all of the social media rules and regulations when it comes to social media. I guess I would say to really keep an eye out for him lying or being deceitful. I don't consider playing words with friends as cheating.

 

[FrazzledFraggle]

WWF is like challenging your friends to scrabble. It's not timed so you might create a word, log off an not create another word for hours or days (which is why sometimes it can take a few days to finish a game).

I understand where you are coming from because they have a past connection. I would like to say you have nothing to worry about but I don't know....he may think it's completely innocent. It probably is. However, when I was dating, I generally would give an SO enough rope to hang themselves. In this case, I wouldn't have said anything....I would have just kept an eye on where it's going. At this point, he may not be doing anything but if he intended to, he sure wasn't going to tell you about it. Now if he was, he'll just be more careful about it.

 

[Fine 4s]

I don't believe that behaviors like this mean he is/was cheating but I would
be concerned about intention. While you can't jail someone for intention, patterns do tell you a lot. There probably would be some trust issues developing for me after this...did you tell him how you feel or are you going to give him enough rope to hang himself?

 

[SoopremeBeing]

1) Flirty/sexually explicit text messages/phone calls

2) Any sexual act with any person outside of our relationship. Kissing included.

 

[Foxglove]

Over words with friends?

Seriously OP it's just like playing scrabble. Literally. You're asking if they're cheating by playing scrabble online

 

[cutiepiebabygirl]

Seems harmless...

But if you're uncomfortable with it, ask him to stop.

 

[nlamr2013]

yeah I'm not seeing where he lied to you. Does he usually tell you every single person he plays wwf with online??

 

[PeaceFlow]

While I don't consider it cheating, I don't approve of regular contact with members of the opposite sex SO (or I) find particularly attractive.

If the crush is still there then I don't care if they are doing morse code, or playing pong, I don't think it's appropriate. SO feels the same.

 

[MD_Lady]

I can understand why you feel the way you do, grow_N_Him09, but I think the poster who asked if he usually tells you who he plays WWF with raised a good question. You also said she tried to contact him one time before, but he nipped it in the bud; what was that about? Could it be possible that he entertained the WWF request (and didn't say anything to you about it) because he didn't think it was that big of a deal?

 

[FearlessNik]

Cheating? Thinking about his fantasy woman. Looking at any other woman. Breathing hard when any other woman enters the room. Talking to any woman other than his Mama or sisters (this doesn't include cousins). Any woman in his phone. Talking to women at work. Talking to any of the basic chicks that work as a cashier at all the fast food places. Basically anything that has nothing to do with me is cheating.

Seriously though. IA with 'anything that can't be said/ done in front of me'. Hiding/ lying by omission.

 

[Lucie]

Anything that I would not feel comfortable enough to do in front of his face.