The Straight Hair Effect: I Didn't Believe It Until It Happened To Me

[Hysi]

i just bc'd this week and i've been getting lots "eyes". doesn't really seem any different to me. he says, "yea baby!"

 

[Gracie]

Yes, I've noticed this too. When I wear my hair straight, people are more inclined to compliment me on my hair or appearance. We live in a looks obsessed society.

It's not only hair but the way you look in general greatly impacts how others percieve and treat you. As a teenager I went through a period when I became very overweight, and let me tell you, there was a drastic difference in how I was treated and how others responded to me. Even doctors and medical "professionals" were ignorant. People react differently to people based on skin color, body size, and percieved attractiveness (having features that society deems as attractive).

I do get compliments on my natural hair, but yes, people tend to respond more positively to my straight hair. This makes me want to stay natural and not straighten my hair even more.

I've experience the same EXACT thing.

 

[Freespirit02]

I hate to say it, but I think it depends on your hair texture. For some people..if you have a looser curl to your natural hair..they may like it better. If you have more kinky hair...they may treat you better when it's straight.

 

[music-bnatural-smile]

get used to it new naturals... its the story of my life

 

[prettynatural]

In the work arena, I haven't had a problem at all and especially to find jobs and I live in TN to boot.

In regards to black men, I don't get looked at twice but Latino and other men always holla. IF I wear a straight wig, I get more looks from black men but less from others.

In my experience, I noticed that I don't have a problem with white people and my hair on the job. White people know our hair is different and as long as you are presentable and professional it's all good.

Men are men, can't change that. I don't want a man who cannot accept me for me anyways. So, if he don't like the kink and coils, keep it moving!

 

[I AM...]

For the most part I get mixed reviews. But I must say I get a completely different approach when I wear my hair natural. BM are more respectful "Hello my sister", "Good Morning queen" When I wear it straight I get, "Yo, blue shirt." "Is that all you Ma"

I have also noticed that when I do not receive a warm reception until after I smile. For some reason natural hair is associated with anger and rebellion. I find myself attempting to smile more, especially when I am in the workplace, when I wear my natural hair.

Regardless my hair is fabulous and stronger in it's natural state. I will continue to rock it regardless. GO ME!!!

 

[Harina]

For the most part I get mixed reviews. But I must say I get a completely different approach when I wear my hair natural. BM are more respectful "Hello my sister", "Good Morning queen" When I wear it straight I get, "Yo, blue shirt." "Is that all you Ma"

I have also noticed that when I do not receive a warm reception until after I smile. For some reason natural hair is associated with anger and rebellion. I find myself attempting to smile more, especially when I am in the workplace, when I wear my natural hair.

Regardless my hair is fabulous and stronger in it's natural state. I will continue to rock it regardless. GO ME!!!

totally true. It's weird that the straight hair, which is supposed to be more respectable gets the hoodrats coming. While the natural "unruly" sometimes gets the most respectful comments.

 

[afiya27]

When I would hear people say that wearing their hair straight DRASTICALLY affected people's responses towards them, I figured they may have been embellishing a little. Now, I'm natural and given what I know about European standard of beauty's affect on people, I no longer underestimate this fact.

This point was really driven home when I flat-ironed my hair this weekend. Maybe I hadn't paid attention before, but people especially "others", were so polite and cordial to me.Smiling at me and making small talk...this rarely ever happens when I wear my hair natural. I didn't dress differently than when I wear my hair in it's natural state and I still wore my normal make-up, earrings etc. I received compliments on how pretty I was or my hair, but I looked the same as I did when I wear my natural hair. Nothing changed except my hair .

Is straight hair really that serious!?

I've observed that, while it's not REALLY that serious, it's pretty serious nonetheless ... Meaning, in a vacuum/void of cultural-history etc, it wouldn't matter either way. But in THIS (U.S.) reality, yeah it's a factor. I noticed this when I first BCd my WL dreadlocks. I am currently in graduate school in a predominantly white institution. It was FASCINATING how many of my white classmates, most of whom I was actually FRIENDLY with, didn't even want to ACKNOWLEDGE my hair! I mean, HELLO!?, from WL to TWA with no warning!? We're "friends"?, you're supposed to be "intelligent"?, and you ... don't NOTICE it? ... Interesting ...

It was even more fascinating how NON-American 'whites' responded. One of the only European descended people who seemed comfortable acknowledging/commenting on my hair was, noteably, a literal EUROPEAN woman (born and bread, accent and all) from Romania! She had NO problem with it. She actually said she liked it! Funny thing is, she said it in front of some of the American whites who were trying to act like they didn't notice it! LOL! Then, all of a sudden they had to grudgingly mumble 'oh yeah ... you did cut it ... mumble mumble". LOL! A VERY telling experience! ...

Am I reading too much into this? Or does it seem that American whites are SO racially(and/or genderly?)-sensitized when it comes to hair that even the perfectly "intelligent" and/or "friendly" ones among them can't even bring themselves to ACKNOWLEDGE when a natural haired person has DRASTICALLY altered it! I mean, yeah, you could argue that, due to the drastic-ness of the change, and/or the way that they're socially conditioned racial/gender-wise, they probably didn't LIKE it. But damn, if a white woman in my grad program that I'm cool with had say, conventional APL, blond-ish hair one day, then suddenly showed up the next day with a rainbow colored MO-HAWK that I DETESTED, I'd still ACKNOWLEDGE that she'd DONE something! If only to NOT look like an idiot with no social skills! I know these folks KNOW how to act in other contexts socially-speaking because. to make matters worse, a few days later, a white girl cut her hair a LITTLE bit, and the same folks "noticed" right away and commented on it! ... So, yeah, this was eye-opening as to where "we" are on these matters.

I can't help wondering what they would've said if I'd shown up in a Hally Berry type of short cut instead of a TWA ... But, this experience was actually a factor in my decision to NOT wear a straight bob-length wig that I'd bought subsequent to this experience, to school and/or to EVER straighten my hair in front of those folks! I mean can you IMAGINE? NO comment on my natural styles, but a WONDERFUL reception on my bobbed, straight WIG!?! I would lose ALL respect for them!

Basically, it appears that we've got a LOT of work on our hands ya'll! Chris Rock, Oprah, Solange, Barack, those folks are opening DOORS for real, authentic interracial conversations/interactions to occur. But it's often going to have to be US in the TRENCHES/GRASSROOTS, rolling up our sleeves to 'work with' these 'fools' if we want real progress to actually take place ... Sigh ... the (degrading/uncomfortable) things we do to help heal our country of the diseases called racism and sexism! ... But we have to remember that this is for our daughters (AND sons) ... Hopefully one day our descedants won't have to know this reality ... After all, I'm SURE that the slaves had that hope. And, for all intents and purposes, it came true! So if this is our leg of the track, I've realized that I have to try harder not to drop the batton ... IOW, I probably could've pushed those white folk towards basic decent human behavior, but I was just sooo surprised/shocked/uncomfortable at the time! I couldn't do it!

Sorry ya'll! I'll be ready next time!

 

[danigurl18]

I experience it all the time..I had one guy in my class who didn't even notice me until I straightened my hair.. I was like I sit behind you everyday.. He said I guess I didn't notice.. that's why I'd rather wear my hair straight so you can really see what people think

 

[NikStarrr]

I've experienced this as well. I haven't gotten any negative responses from my natural styles--I actually get lots of compliments from all ppl, but when I straighten my hair, I do get a different kind of treatment, ESPECIALLY from non-blacks in the work place. I would get more compliments and more attempts at small talk. I found it amusing.

 

[Soliel185]

mmm my scale goes

Straight = more attn from BM, more weave checks from BW. Others give you a lot of "ooooh you look so different" but generally they prefer my hair curly/kinky to straight. I had friends in HS that were seriously devastated when I relaxed - they'd only known me as a natural.

Natural = more attn from others (generalized). More "petting" attempts. I've been stopped by people who just wanted to tell me that my hair was "awesome". Frantic semi stalking behavior from BM who will track me down peeking around corners until they work up the courage to tell me I'm "beautiful". They're very respectful if a tad creepy.

 

[Soliel185]

I've experienced this as well. I haven't gotten any negative responses from my natural styles--I actually get lots of compliments from all ppl, but when I straighten my hair, I do get a different kind of treatment, ESPECIALLY from non-blacks in the work place. I would get more compliments and more attempts at small talk. I found it amusing.

Do you think some non-blacks perceive us as more threatening with our natural hair b/c they believe it means we're "pro-black" and have some sort of raving anti-white/establishment politcal statement to make?

 

[MichelleMyBelle]

I get compliments from more women when my hair is in its natural state. I get more compliments from men when my hair is straight. I only straighten my hair once maybe twice a year. I have not flat ironed my hair all year and its Oct. Maybe next month I will.

I keep my hair at mid-back length when flat ironed. Its my favorite length because its manageable. My hair is collar bone length in it natural state. I never where my hair up.
I've been wearing my hair in its natural state for 16 years. No wigs, no hot combs.

Here are my experiences.

Older white women love my hair straight.
Younger white women love my hair natural.
Young white men, some like it, some don't.
Older black men love my hair straight, a few will give me the head nod when its natural.
Black women love my hair in any state.
Young black men don't say anything, they look confused. LOL

 

[kblc06]

See..it's just the opposite for me. I only get asked if I mixed/indian/etc when my hair is in it's natural state (rarely when my hair is straightened)

Its funny because when I wear my hair straight, I get weave checked, or the "do you have indian in your family?" comments. When I wear my hair in its natural state (360 waves) WNG bun, I get compliments on my hair.erplexed I have also noticed if my hair is straight, I get alot of "what relaxer do you use?" questions. When I state that this is my natural hair, no relaxer, I get this look IDK

 

[JayAnn0513]

I don't wear my hair natural because I'm transitioning and it looks a HAM, but I do get more comments from everyone when my hair is straight and down than I do with nay other hair style. No matter how fly my rod set it, or how cute I think my bun is I only get hair compliments when I'm flat ironed bone straight...

 

[Serenity_Peace]

Laurend, Black men are a mess, and the whole world knows it when Chris Rock opens his mouth.

It's interesting, though, because when I was nappy, I received a bunch of compliments from white men. I mean, it was ridiculous. They couldn't stop hitting on me. I got rebuffed from some black men, but I think that's changing. I think black men are starting to slowly embrace nappyheads. But when I was dating a guy (black man) and he told me that he preferred my hair bone straight rather than curly, I knew that he had deep-seated issues. The relationship was doomed because those issues eventually came to the surface.

 

[NikStarrr]

Do you think some non-blacks perceive us as more threatening with our natural hair b/c they believe it means we're "pro-black" and have some sort of raving anti-white/establishment politcal statement to make?

I don't know. I've wondered that too because of my experience. For some reason, in my experience, straight hair seems to make me more approachable to white women (especially older white women). I'm not sure if that's just based on the style/texture, or if the bigger/wilder hair gives off a more trendy, youthful kind of vibe, that maybe causes them to feel like we wouldn't have anything in common(?). I'm really not sure.

 

[Serenity_Peace]

I get compliments from more women when my hair is in its natural state. I get more compliments from men when my hair is straight. I only straighten my hair once maybe twice a year. I have not flat ironed my hair all year and its Oct. Maybe next month I will.

I keep my hair at mid-back length when flat ironed. Its my favorite length because its manageable. My hair is collar bone length in it natural state. I never where my hair up.
I've been wearing my hair in its natural state for 16 years. No wigs, no hot combs.

Here are my experiences.

Older white women love my hair straight.
Younger white women love my hair natural.
Young white men, some like it, some don't.
Older black men love my hair straight, a few will give me the head nod when its natural.
Black women love my hair in any state.
Young black men don't say anything, they look confused. LOL

You absolutely hit the nail on the head! Knocked it out of the park with this post!! :woohoo2::woohoo2:

 

[Serenity_Peace]

Do you think some non-blacks perceive us as more threatening with our natural hair b/c they believe it means we're "pro-black" and have some sort of raving anti-white/establishment politcal statement to make?

When I was nappy, I think some blacks viewed it as a rejection of traditional standards of beauty. Many blacks are still conservative about hair. The argument that I heard most often was that it's o.k. to be nappy while in graduate school. But once you graduate and enter the "Real World," especially in Corporate America, you will have a difficult time getting a job. If you can find a job in a non-profit, some progressive profession or academia, then wearing your hair in its natural state is fine. But once you're in Corporate America, you have to go straight. Or, if you are nappy, it needs to be pulled back and "neat," as they say.

It's a sad commentary, but that's how it still is for many black people.

It may also depend on where you live. I grew up in Atlanta, and it's still very southern and very conservative. Long hair is in and will always be. Long, straight hair is in--though slowly changing cultural and societal norms means moving towards acceptance of nappyheads.

Here in D.C., seems like every other lady is a nappyhead. Weaves and wigs are plentiful as they are everywhere else, but it is much more progressive when it comes to wearing nappy styles.

It's changing very slowly but it's indeed changing.

 

[MichelleMyBelle]

When I was nappy, I think some blacks viewed it as a rejection of traditional standards of beauty. Many blacks are still conservative about hair. The argument that I heard most often was that it's o.k. to be nappy while in graduate school. But once you graduate and enter the "Real World," especially in Corporate America, you will have a difficult time getting a job. If you can find a job in a non-profit, some progressive profession or academia, then wearing your hair in its natural state is fine. But once you're in Corporate America, you have to go straight. Or, if you are nappy, it needs to be pulled back and "neat," as they say.

It's a sad commentary, but that's how it still is for many black people.

It may also depend on where you live. I grew up in Atlanta, and it's still very southern and very conservative. Long hair is in and will always be. Long, straight hair is in--though slowly changing cultural and societal norms means moving towards acceptance of nappyheads.

Here in D.C., seems like every other lady is a nappyhead. Weaves and wigs are plentiful as they are everywhere else, but it is much more progressive when it comes to wearing nappy styles.

It's changing very slowly but it's indeed changing.

(bold) Oh my you are correct! I heard that too!

I did work for Corporate America for quite some time (L'Oreal) however my experiences were all good because of the company I think. Being a Product Educator/Sales representive was fun and very challenging. I will admit that I believe being a natural head may have helped me get the job aside from my experiences and formal education.

Well, ladies don't laugh. But I stood out! I'm very sharp looking (people tell me this all the time so its not just me). I love fashion. I'm always coloring my hair and at the time of hire my hair color was AMAZINGLY PROGRESSIVE . L'Oreal was confident that I knew my stuff!

I sold the product very well. Kinky hair and all.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

I have gotten more compliments wearing strait hair. I am not natural yet and the only style I can wear is flat twists pulled back into a bun. I'm just not skilled at styling natural hair. I am learning more during this transition.

 

[Nova]

Laurend, Black men are a mess, and the whole world knows it when Chris Rock opens his mouth.

 

[lucea]

I'm relaxed so my hair always appears straight (in a bun)

People respond differently when its down though. Thats especially true with men.

However, the longer it gets, the more folk rubberneck, and that goes for women too.

I had relaxed last weekend after being on a particularly long stretch. (I last relaxed in Marchish?) My hair is probably a bit past MBL though I'm itching to cut it because I can barely deal with it.

I never wear my hair down in work situations unless I'm trying to snag a deal and the top dog is a male. Men are so simple.


-A

Work it, girl.