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~*~THE LOOK~*~ by Porsche

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Porsche19

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If I get the look, then I KNOW you ladies must get it.

It's the... "Is that a weave or her hair?" look. Or possibly is that her natural texture or has she got a perm or relaxer look...

I get it all the time from mostly black women. It's just when they look all in your head you KNOW what the're looking for.

Most times I'm suprised that people would think that it's a weave because my hair is short and the curls aren't... perfect or frizzless like a weave or wig's hair would be. Plus I have a natural middle part... which pretty much shows that I don't have tracks or anything.

Still I hate that look just because I work hard for my hair to be healthy and some ***** will automatically assume that I have a weave. :mad: I don't even wear them. No offense to anyone that does wear them, I just personally don't like them.

I assume that when my hair gets longer, it'll get worse. How do ya'll feel when it happens to you?

Also... this is a dumb little question I want to ask. Is there a such thing as a natural 4a with s-curls and not coils? I was under the impression that s shaped curls was wavy hair and that o shaped coils were all curly hair. I didn't think there was a such thing as a 3a or 3b with s curls without any curls. Could someone clarify this for me????

After studying my hair :lol: I've decided tha it looks like 3c/4a s-curls if such a thing exsists.
 
Personally I don't care if people think my hair is real or not---although its only to my shoulder so why would they??? :D

I also think that not every time someone is looking at your scalp or hair is it in a negative way (of course there are many haters), but if I see a woman with long hair, short hair, medium wavy etc I look because I'm into diff styles and textures. I am sure some people may misintepret my looks as negative but its not.

Sorry can't help you on the hair. I am confused about my own texture.
 
Porsche19 said:
If I get the look, then I KNOW you ladies must get it.

It's the... "Is that a weave or her hair?" look. Or possibly is that her natural texture or has she got a perm or relaxer look...

I get it all the time from mostly black women. It's just when they look all in your head you KNOW what the're looking for.

Most times I'm suprised that people would think that it's a weave because my hair is short and the curls aren't... perfect or frizzless like a weave or wig's hair would be. Plus I have a natural middle part... which pretty much shows that I don't have tracks or anything.

Still I hate that look just because I work hard for my hair to be healthy and some ***** will automatically assume that I have a weave. :mad: I don't even wear them. No offense to anyone that does wear them, I just personally don't like them.

I assume that when my hair gets longer, it'll get worse. How do ya'll feel when it happens to you?

Also... this is a dumb little question I want to ask. Is there a such thing as a natural 4a with s-curls and not coils? I was under the impression that s shaped curls was wavy hair and that o shaped coils were all curly hair. I didn't think there was a such thing as a 3a or 3b with s curls without any curls. Could someone clarify this for me????

After studying my hair :lol: I've decided tha it looks like 3c/4a s-curls if such a thing exsists.


I got this the other day on the bus ... some catty teenaged girls .. thought my hair was a weave... I felt bad for them .. because they are convinced that black women cannot have lovely hair....
 
Enjoy the looks (or stares) and take it as a compliment. :yep: I recently had an episode at the asian beauty supply store. The girl was assisting me with my instant weave and pulled my real hair into the cap when she realized it was my hair and had this look on her face like "this is all yours? I thought you had tracks!" :nuts: Then I compared a recent photo of myself to the weave I used to wear three years ago and realized that maybe my hair does look like a weave! :lol: Can you tell? The photo on the right is my hair.
 

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I get "the look" all the time. So much so that is scary. When me and my husband go out, I get a lot of stares at my hair. I usually wear it really big and wild and people have a tendency to want to touch it. Now, that really irks me. I just ignore the looks.
 
I get the look as well. I also get the backlash because I never had damage from relaxers. First it's "is that ALL yours?" When I say yes and they ask about my hair, I would say its chemically straightened. They give me grief because their hair fell out and mine didn't. I want to help them out by suggesting HEALTHY ways to take care of their hair but they continue to hate. It can only get worse....thick, healthy long hair....might as well get used to it ladies. :perplexed

RE: hair type...I need to know as well. I have the hills and valleys of an S but I have some curls too. Very perplexed.
 
I don't look at it as hate... I take it as a compliment. Most weave hair is very thick, full, and beautiful. I love people to ask me if it's my hair or a weave. And my hair isn't THAT long, so I can only imagine what will happen as I continue (hopefully!) to retain length.
 
I get that look to! I don't have long hair but I would say it is somewhat thick! LIke Sunday my own cousin said is that a wig ( I redid my own hair with some rods it looks somewhat like an afro to me)!
 
This topic makes me self-conscious when I notice someone with pretty hair. Like I want to look and appreciate her hair, but I'm afraid that my stare would be taken as a negative connotation, like wondering if it's real or fake. To put it simple, I LOVE beautiful hair and sometimes someone's hair catches my attention. Sometimes it's the perfect beautiful curls that i like, or the thickness, or the straightness and body, or maybe even the color or length.

Which brings me to my point....being asked if you have a weave isn't necessarily a negative comment. In my opinion, weaves are perfect sets of full, thick beautiful hair/hair styles that someone covets enough to pay top-dollar for. So basically when they are staring ad wondering if it's a weave, they are saying '"you have perfect thick beautiful hair", which IS a compliment. I mean after all, all the hardwork you do... Isn't it nice that someone took the time out of their busy day, to notice your piece of art, your crown and glory??? (But please don't touch my locs... :look: )
 
Mizani_Mrs said:
...being asked if you have a weave isn't necessarily a negative comment. In my opinion, weaves are perfect sets of full, thick beautiful hair/hair styles that someone covets enough to pay top-dollar for. So basically when they are staring ad wondering if it's a weave, they are saying '"you have perfect thick beautiful hair", which IS a compliment. I mean after all, all the hardwork you do... Isn't it nice that someone took the time out of their busy day, to notice your piece of art, your crown and glory??? (But please don't touch my locs... :look: )

Exactly! The only time I get offended or self conscious is when it IS a weave or wig! :lol: :lol:
 
I am not observant enough to notice whether someone is looking at my hair, but if I am out with someone else, they might mention that someone has been looking at it. Then they might tell me what they assume the person is thinking. :lol:

Other than that, I only know someone has been looking at it if they come up to me and offer a compliment, or if they ask if it's real. Fortunately, it's rare that people will ask if it's real -- a few Asian beauty supply store owners have asked and only a few Black people I can think of have. That's about it.

Most people who offer compliments do so in a way that leads me to believe they understand that my hair is real. A couple of weeks ago, I had a LHCF moment where a woman in line behind me at the grocery store got my attention and tugged on her hair, then pointed to my hair and told me I was, "Doing a good job! Keep it up!" Then she asked me what I use on my hair, so I told her. She seemed very interested in what I was saying so I took out my grocery list pad and wrote the products and stores where they can be found down for her.

I'm calling that a 'LHCF moment' because I've read posts here before about how people ask members what they use on their hair, but that had never happened to me before. In my life, people have always been nice as far as giving compliments, but no stranger had ever asked what I used so they could use it too. So, I got a real kick out of that lady asking and was happy to recommend stuff to her. :)
 
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I was thinking of the negative comments when I wrote the first post.

Especially from catty women, I mean girls have even said out loud that I'm wearing a weave to try and embarrass me.

Some women are nice and ask what I use... still, sadly it's mostly negative comments that I get. I guess I really don't feel that they are thinking anything nice about me when they stare because I am used to people being not so nice.
 
Take the looks as a compliment. I recently ran into a friend who usually wears her hair in a bun. Her plait had grown so long over the last year that I did find myself sneaking a lot of peaks at it. I know her regimen already, but I was really impressed by her growth. Sometimes the looks are not hate but admiration---just give it the benefit of the doubt. And just ignore the ignorant comments and actions of the haters.
 
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Porsche19 said:
I was thinking of the negative comments when I wrote the first post.

Especially from catty women, I mean girls have even said out loud that I'm wearing a weave to try and embarrass me.

Some women are nice and ask what I use... still, sadly it's mostly negative comments that I get. I guess I really don't feel that they are thinking anything nice about me when they stare because I am used to people being not so nice.

I'm really sorry that you've encountered such negative people. :(

I did think of another situation that could have been negative, but turned out well. I was at a fair and two young women were standing next to me. At first, I could just hear bits of their whispering. One was saying, "Right here. The girl right next to us."

I thought they might be referring to me so I cautiously turned to look at them and could see them looking at me, but they turned their heads quickly. When I turned back around, one girl said to the other, "No girl, that's her hair. She just has combs in it to hold it up." (I had my hair it in a half up/half down style.)

I was so happy that the girl said that to her friend. If she hadn't, I know it might have put a damper on my day because I am a sensitive person. I am not the type who would have said anything to them to "defend" myself. Plus, you never know what type of people strangers are -- they might be violent.

Please don't let other people make you feel bad. I bet in the instances where those women tried to embarrass you, other people who were in the area could tell your hair was yours and thought badly of those women. :yep:
 
Lorraine said:
Enjoy the looks (or stares) and take it as a compliment. :yep: I recently had an episode at the asian beauty supply store. The girl was assisting me with my instant weave and pulled my real hair into the cap when she realized it was my hair and had this look on her face like "this is all yours? I thought you had tracks!" :nuts: Then I compared a recent photo of myself to the weave I used to wear three years ago and realized that maybe my hair does look like a weave! :lol: Can you tell? The photo on the right is my hair.

ITA with you! I get this all the time too! I don't even consider my hair 'all that' yet, I mean I'm happy with my lenght but I know I can have so much more! Whenever women or men or those of other races wonder I take it as a big ole compliment...yes my hair really is that beautiful and healthy without being a weave! I went to the wig store with my friends the other day and the lady taught my hair was a wig or a piece she started touching it and realized it was all mine...she was impressed...to be honest it made my day!;)










www.fotki.com/nubian7
password:hair
 
renee_n_3000 said:
..I thought they might be referring to me so I cautiously turned to look at them and could see them looking at me, but they turned their heads quickly... I was so happy that the girl said that to her friend. If she hadn't, I know it might have put a damper on my day because I am a sensitive person. I am not the type who would have said anything to them to "defend" myself. Plus, you never know what type of people strangers are -- they might be violent.

..I bet in the instances where those women tried to embarrass you, other people who were in the area could tell your hair was yours and thought badly of those women. :yep:

You're joking right :confused: Why in the WORLD would you feel bad or feel the need to defend yourself against total strangers?? That weren't even talking TO you? That you will never see again? That don't know you from a hole in the wall?? Please, I would have taken out my clip and slung my head from side to side all diva like then threw my hair over my shoulder and kept it pushin!

I don't get it. I think we sometimes give other people WAAYYY too much control over us.
 
oh girl i get "the look" too i had a texturizer which was cute but i wasn't feeling it so i got my hair relaxed and cut in to a cut little style now people always walk up to me and say things like "Oh your hair is nice but why did you cut it you should have got a cap or weave?" Cuz it's my hair. "Oh your bald head now" Please my hair could be close to bra strap by now thanks to LHCF my hairdresser (how is very in to healthy hair her and her mother hair are mid-back) says my hair has never been healthier. People can't seem to understand i like my hair short and it's a choice to wear it this way not because my hair was breaking so bad i had to cut it or something i just like it that way, but these people me wanna get on a growth challenge grow this hair out and then cut it off again and piss them off even more
 
sprungonhairboards said:
You're joking right :confused: Why in the WORLD would you feel bad or feel the need to defend yourself against total strangers?? That weren't even talking TO you? That you will never see again? That don't know you from a hole in the wall?? Please, I would have taken out my clip and slung my head from side to side all diva like then threw my hair over my shoulder and kept it pushin!

I don't get it. I think we sometimes give other people WAAYYY too much control over us.

I added that part because I have heard/seen people say they started yelling at the person who "accused" them of having a weave as a way of "defending" themselves and "putting the accuser in their place." I remember one girl from an old hair board who said she actually got in a fist fight with a girl who insulted her hair, which was a weave.

I've never been in a fight or even seen one in real life -- not even when I was a child in school. So, that kind of reaction seems strange and troubling to me. That's what I was thinking about when I wrote that. I'd rather leave a person who has no relationship to me alone than argue with them.

But yes, it does make me uncomfortable or sad when people are purposefully unkind to each other for any reason. That's simply a behavior that I don't understand.
 
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Hey!!!! LORRAINEG!!!!

YOUR ALBUM update IS the BOMB!!!!!

OK......what are you braiding your hair with .......more importantly...how many braids are you doing....when i do four I get crazy tight wavies!!! I love your braid out :wave: :bouncy: :bouncy:

Thanks in advance :angel:



Opps ok back on topic..... I try not to pay attention.....I keep it movin.
in the beginning, it kinda made me uncomfortable and upset because I am like.....why cant a black women wear her own hair whichever way she likes....why does it have to be a weave?

It made me mad culturally because EVERYONE, black, white, hispanic, etc,etc, MEN and Women sees a black women and they see weave, fake nails, etc, etc....


We get no respect..... but now I hold my head up high and keep it movin...they are going to think what they want and if they are lucky they will ask you what u do and they may learn something...if not, hey, keep going to the chinese lady and get the weave cause you cant take care of you hair... is what I say...( I making a general statement here...I know some women wear weaves cause the want to, like to and just dont give a damn! :lol: just cause More POwer to ya; I am talking to the haters....)

Peace and Love :)
 
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thickness said:
I get "the look" all the time. So much so that is scary. When me and my husband go out, I get a lot of stares at my hair. I usually wear it really big and wild and people have a tendency to want to touch it. Now, that really irks me. I just ignore the looks.

same here! I get the look when I wear my hair in a braidout and it's really big, fluffy afro. Everyone looks and then asks to touch it and I'm like um you have 3 seconds to get away from me! :lol:
 
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