Teenage Love?! "He said he will hurt me if I ever leave him..."

I just realized it sort of looks like she has a black eye. So sad! We got to teach our children better. I think I'm going to seek a mentor ship position for teenage girls.
 
Arlana said:
I suppose you're right...
well he wasn't my husband at the time, he was just a new bf lol and obviously I'm still here :look:. I guess I was commenting on how it didn't bother me at all which still baffles me a bit.
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A lot of things about your marriage baffles the rest of us as well.

You say "I still married him," and "Well I'm still here" as if you are proud of continuing a relationship with a man who [seriously] threatened your life very early in your relationship.

What baffles me even more is that you don't realize that the option to kill you is still on the table and is still a possibility. You may be "here" today, but believe me when I say that if he wanted to...you'd be gone tomorrow.

Sorry to hijack the thread...carry on.
 
Mai Tai said:
A lot of things about your marriage baffles the rest of us as well.

You say "I still married him," and "Well I'm still here" as if you are proud of continuing a relationship with a man who [seriously] threatened your life very early in your relationship.

What baffles me even more is that you don't realize that the option to kill you is still on the table and is still a possibility. You may be "here" today, but believe me when I say that if he wanted to...you'd be gone tomorrow.

Sorry to hijack the thread...carry on.
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K now you're scaring me lol.
I don't think the option to kill me is still or ever was truly on the table and I don't believe he would ever physically harm me.
 
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Seriously? :perplexed

Arlana Has DH said anything like that since that incident?

*projecting* This is one of the many reasons why I work with young ladies and elementary-aged girls. I remind them every day that I love them, they are smart, they are talented, and they are beautiful. I really hope they don't look for a man/boy to validate their worth, because a situation like that is not healthy for either party involved.

I fear for this young lady's safety and emotional well being.
 
Arlana said:
K now you're scaring me lol.
I don't think the option to kill me is still or ever was truly on the table and I don't believe he would ever physically harm me.
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Well the fact that the words crossed his lips leads me to believe he's capable. Why would he say it if he didn't feel that on some level.
 
Arlana said:
K now you're scaring me lol.
I don't think the option to kill me is still or ever was truly on the table and I don't believe he would ever physically harm me.
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Girl stop...for real.

My little ole post scared you, but the threat your husband made in person didn't?

I'm going to move on, but i will tell you that in ALLLL of my years on this earth, I have NEVER had a man threaten my life, playfully or seriously.

I value my life so very much that even if a man jokingly told me he would kill me, I will roll the hell out. I'm not going to stick around to see if he decides to become serious.
 
Mai Tai said:
Girl stop...for real.

My little ole post scared you, but the threat your husband made in person didn't?

I'm going to move on, but i will tell you that in ALLLL of my years on this earth, I have NEVER had a man threaten my life, playfully or seriously.

I value my life so very much that even if a man jokingly told me he would kill me, I will roll the hell out. I'm not going to stick around to see if he decides to become serious.
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I can believe that. She married him, she probably took it as love (and maybe it did scare her, but they twisted the thought into "love") and maybe your post scared it because hopefully it gave her some perspective. IDK. I wish we had more DV awareness in school because things like this and the OP can start at an early age, especially if they see the same things going on at home.
 
NappyNelle said:
Seriously? :perplexed

@Arlana Has DH said anything like that since that incident?

*projecting* This is one of the many reasons why I work with young ladies and elementary-aged girls. I remind them every day that I love them, they are smart, they are talented, and they are beautiful. I really hope they don't look for a man/boy to validate their worth, because a situation like that is not healthy for either party involved.

I fear for this young lady's safety and emotional well being.
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Carrie A said:
Well the fact that the words crossed his lips leads me to believe he's capable. Why would he say it if he didn't feel that on some level.
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Mai Tai said:
Girl stop...for real.

My little ole post scared you, but the threat your husband made in person didn't?

I'm going to move on, but i will tell you that in ALLLL of my years on this earth, I have NEVER had a man threaten my life, playfully or seriously.

I value my life so very much that even if a man jokingly told me he would kill me, I will roll the hell out. I'm not going to stick around to see if he decides to become serious.
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He's never been physically abusive with me, even on occasions when I have with him. He's certainly said things that alarmed me since but I guess it's the fact that he's never been physically violent with me that I don't believe he'd ever harm me. I think sometimes people say things because it helps them feel in control of a situation or they're just expressing anger but it doesn't mean they'd actually act upon it. I guess it's hard to understand but I'm confident... perhaps I'm just naive lol. I'm sure if he had ever hit me that I would not have ever married him.
But I guess I can understand your points of view...
 
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classoohfive said:
I can believe that. She married him, she probably took it as love (and maybe it did scare her, but they twisted the thought into "love") and maybe your post scared it because hopefully it gave her some perspective. IDK. I wish we had more DV awareness in school because things like this and the OP can start at an early age, especially if they see the same things going on at home.
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The incident I mentioned happened like 7 years before I married him lol. He's always been possessive which is a double edged sword for me, I like it because it makes me feel secure but it's also stifling.
 
Mai Tai said:
The f-ck?!?!?!?

Besides the obvious..what really bothers me is "We too real for this"

Having a man hold a gun to your head is real? Girl...that ride or die mentality is going to be the end of you! I just can't. Lord help our children!
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This is scary to me, I had a friend at school whose younger boyfriend accidentally shot her cos he was playing with his gun and it fired. This isn't a good look and just playing with guns like this is dangerous,
 
Some of you are acting brand new, I have heard plenty of women here threaten to kill their DH if he ever cheated on them are we meant t think they too are capable of killing their husbands over just this? Stop riding Selina, by now most people know how she rolls, her husband has never touched her and frankly she has more to fear from some of you ladies who are always gunning for her online. No shade but from some of the things she says online or the way she reacts to stuff I would say for the most part she is quiet over sensitive and sheltered so she probably likes having someone protect her, is she meant to live her hubby cos he made a bad joke 7 years ago in the heat of passion..
 
Naveah2050 said:
Some of you are acting brand new, I have heard plenty of women here threaten to kill their DH if he ever cheated on them are we meant t think they too are capable of killing their husbands over just this? Stop riding Selina, by now most people know how she rolls, her husband has never touched her and frankly she has more to fear from some of you ladies who are always gunning for her online. No shade but from some of the things she says online or the way she reacts to stuff I would say for the most part she is quiet over sensitive and sheltered so she probably likes having someone protect her, is she meant to live her hubby cos he made a bad joke 7 years ago in the heat of passion..
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Not everyone who disagrees with her is riding her or gunning for her. In fact, I defended her last time it happened against people who were clearly going at her just to do it.

With that being said, don't assume anyone that says something in disagreement is a part of that group. I wasn't concern trolling when I made my comment and I hope she doesn't brush off some of these comments as such. I'm not going to stop a grown person from doing what they want, but I can point out warning signs if someone choose to put their business out there (if you post about it, people can reply). Despite what goes on between her and other people around this forum, I sincerely hope she's okay (not just physically, "never touching" someone doesn't mean everything is okay) and stays that way.


Oh, and she said it wasn't a joke:

Arlana said:
I remember after our first make out session a guy told me if I ever do this with anyone else he'd kill me, and it wasn't said in a joking way but I don't recall being disturbed but it even though it was received as a threat , I was pleased he felt so possessive over me as to say something like that :nono:. There were no weapons involved of course though lol . I ended up marrying him :look:.
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But whatever. There were other things said but I didn't bother responding to her reply to me because of people that do gun for her and the people like you on the other end of the spectrum. She'd probably just brush me off as one of her haters so I didn't bother. I'll just be quiet and hope everything's okay despite reading words I've heard from more than a few women who were in horrible situations.
 
I think Arlana shared to her story for the people who were like "OMG!! What's wrong with her? Is she a hostage? Wth?!" just to make the point that, welp, it happens. :look: I don't think she wanted input or an intervention, even if it came from a good place.

It's never happened to me, and I would stab a m--------a, but everybody ain't me. :look:
 
Honey Bee said:
I think Arlana shared to her story for the people who were like "OMG!! What's wrong with her? Is she a hostage? Wth?!" just to make the point that, welp, it happens. :look: I don't think she wanted input or an intervention, even if it came from a good place.

It's never happened to me, and I would stab a m--------a, but everybody ain't me. :look:
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I mostly just agreed with her "it happens" point and held off giving much input; but I had to give a little bit when it seemed like a poster couldn't believe she would be okay with what was said to her when it was clear they don't quite understand that type of situation.

She obviously didn't want input or an intervention, but when you post things, input happens. :spinning: I just sucks that everyone who disagrees with her is put in the same box, especially in this situation.
 
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