Nature'sWay
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I haven't talked to him, he hasn't even tried to call. I have written him off to be honest. I really don't think that I want to be bothered with someone as insenstive and inconsiderate as him.
I had been talking to this guy for about three months as friends. We didn't see each other very often because both of us go to school and work full time. When we would have conversations on the phone he would talk as if he wanted a relationship to stem from our friendship and one day I told him that one of my family members asked who he was and I told them that he was my friend who had a potential to be my boyfriend.
The week of Valentines Day comes and he doesn't even acknowledge me. This has definitely showed me what he really think of me despite the many I like yous he have told me. I am still upset because I did like him and I thought that he liked me. I am disappointed and pretty hurt even days later. I did go out with my friends the night of Valentines but I would have rather spent time with a guy who I liked. Later that night of Valentines my mom asked me what he got me (because she introduced me to him) and I told her nothing and that I was done talking to him because he doesn't really like me the way I thought.
She got upset and told his father to tell him not to call me again (he lives with his parents while finishing up school). I am feeling like with every guy it is always something wrong with them but I refuse to lower my standards. If you are wondering, I am in my early twenties. What do you think about the situation?
I think you should talk to him before cutting him off. I also think that mom dukes should not have gotten involved. You're a big girl and I am sure you can handle yourself
I haven't talked to him, he hasn't even tried to call. I have written him off to be honest. I really don't think that I want to be bothered with someone as insenstive and inconsiderate as him.[/quote]
All the more reason to move on.
I haven't talked to him, he hasn't even tried to call. I have written him off to be honest. I really don't think that I want to be bothered with someone as insenstive and inconsiderate as him.
Well done Serenity21. I am the same age as you and I refuse to lower my standards. Better to be with friends that wasting time with a thoughtless, uncaring man. Let him be someone else's problem. Your response was 100% right. For all you know, he's got someone else.
I think you should talk to him before cutting him off. I also think that mom dukes should not have gotten involved. You're a big girl and I am sure you can handle yourself
I'm gonna post an unpopular opinion, so here goes...
I think it's great that her mom got involved and that his father knows the deal.
Yes, the OP is grown and all that, but I think that one reason that we have so many young men acting like fools in their relationships with young women is because there is NO accountability. In the past, parents were very much involved in making sure that their young adult children were involved with the right people and you knew that if you wronged someone, then you'd have to answer to her family and your own family.
Now there are no consequences. Dudes can do whatever they want, women can do whatever they want and nobody is supposed to say nothing because, "They're grown."
I'm just thinking that maybe if some of these parents questioned their children about their behavior, it "might" cause them to think twice before they treat others as if they have no feelings and can be thrown to the side when they decide they're no longer interested.
It's not a perfect solution, but I wish more parents would get involved, honestly.
He did not get her pregnant and dump her. He neglected to buy her a gift for V-day. They're not in a relationship. They are (were) talking. Why involve the parents? Furthermore, no one knows why he didn't buy her anything. Maybe he did not think that what they had warranted a gift of any sort...
ETA: Let's teach our daughters to not become too emotionally invested in "friends" or anyone that they are not in a clear cut relationship with. No offense, OP.
Why involve the parents? .
You need to talk to him.
My co-worker has been married for 5 years to a very good man who treats her very well. On their first valentine's day together, he didn't do ANYTHING for her. He even took her to his parents' home where the dad bought his wife a huge bouquet of roses and candy and diamond jewelry and the guy did nothing, he didn't even say anything to her. She was so angry!! Finally she called him at the end of the night to tell him off and he told her the reason he didn't do anything for her is that he simply does not believe in valentines. He said he thinks it is commercial and a sham, just ridiculous basically.
Anyway, she told him that he may not care about it but it means the world to her. So now, he always sends a huge thingy of flowers to work every V-Day even though it is not his thing.
The sense I get from your situation is he didn't think the relationship was a relationship yet and he didn't want to make things seem otherwise.
I would advise against letting your mom handle your business. It sets a precedent in a relationship. If a guy I was dating's mom called my home to chime in about something between us, I probably would never call him back. It is possible that's why he didn't call you back.
Young people need to be held accountable in the sense that if they treat you badly everyone will be aware, but it is not the parents' place to handle the childrens' business.
I'm gonna post an unpopular opinion, so here goes...
I think it's great that her mom got involved and that his father knows the deal.
Yes, the OP is grown and all that, but I think that one reason that we have so many young men acting like fools in their relationships with young women is because there is NO accountability. In the past, parents were very much involved in making sure that their young adult children were involved with the right people and you knew that if you wronged someone, then you'd have to answer to her family and your own family.
Now there are no consequences. Dudes can do whatever they want, women can do whatever they want and nobody is supposed to say nothing because, "They're grown."
I'm just thinking that maybe if some of these parents questioned their children about their behavior, it "might" cause them to think twice before they treat others as if they have no feelings and can be thrown to the side when they decide they're no longer interested.
It's not a perfect solution, but I wish more parents would get involved, honestly.
I'm gonna post an unpopular opinion, so here goes...
I think it's great that her mom got involved and that his father knows the deal.
Yes, the OP is grown and all that, but I think that one reason that we have so many young men acting like fools in their relationships with young women is because there is NO accountability. In the past, parents were very much involved in making sure that their young adult children were involved with the right people and you knew that if you wronged someone, then you'd have to answer to her family and your own family.
Now there are no consequences. Dudes can do whatever they want, women can do whatever they want and nobody is supposed to say nothing because, "They're grown."
I'm just thinking that maybe if some of these parents questioned their children about their behavior, it "might" cause them to think twice before they treat others as if they have no feelings and can be thrown to the side when they decide they're no longer interested.
It's not a perfect solution, but I wish more parents would get involved, honestly.
You need to talk to him.
My co-worker has been married for 5 years to a very good man who treats her very well. On their first valentine's day together, he didn't do ANYTHING for her. He even took her to his parents' home where the dad bought his wife a huge bouquet of roses and candy and diamond jewelry and the guy did nothing, he didn't even say anything to her. She was so angry!! Finally she called him at the end of the night to tell him off and he told her the reason he didn't do anything for her is that he simply does not believe in valentines. He said he thinks it is commercial and a sham, just ridiculous basically.
Anyway, she told him that he may not care about it but it means the world to her. So now, he always sends a huge thingy of flowers to work every V-Day even though it is not his thing.
The sense I get from your situation is he didn't think the relationship was a relationship yet and he didn't want to make things seem otherwise.
I would advise against letting your mom handle your business. It sets a precedent in a relationship. If a guy I was dating's mom called my home to chime in about something between us, I probably would never call him back. It is possible that's why he didn't call you back.
Young people need to be held accountable in the sense that if they treat you badly everyone will be aware, but it is not the parents' place to handle the childrens' business.
i understand where you are coming from but even if it wasnt a life changing thing such as pregnancy it was still disrespectful, yes they were not dating but at the same time they have been talking and inclined that way at the very least they were friends. The parents were involved because her mum kind of brought them together which may mean his father also knew of this situation them getting to know each other
I dont think the OP was too emotionally invested i mean its not like she is crying herself to sleep or anything but just really annoyed n a lil hurt cause of the fact that they have been talking for a while like normal pple do and feelings were getting that little bit deeper hence him saying he likes her and her sharing those feelings. i mean if this guy felt a valentines day gift wasnt warrented then why did he just stop contacting her around valentines day time?? coincidence?? it doesnt seem too likely.