Sometimes I Just Want to Cry...

january noir

january noir

Sunny On a Cloudy Day
I know that patience is a virtue, but sometimes I just want to cry. I have been doing all I can to make my hair healthier and grow longer, but I still get breakage and I had to cut off 2 inches of my acquired length because it was thin and scraggley looking. I had one patch of hair that was BSL and the rest was just "holding" at SL. The BSL patch was what I had to cut.

I started tracking my hair healtlh and length progress in Noviember (officially) and I feel like I have not achieved any progress. I am just venting right now and I know in a years time all will be good, but I feel so defeated when I see all the luscious heads of hair out there.

I've henna'd, indigo'd, deep conditioned, moisturized, etc., etc. etc. and I don't feel like I am accomplishing my goals.

Yes, it's a pity party that I am giving... but I just had to say it... I am feeling so unattractive right now.

The sun will come out tomorrow, tomorrow, bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow, come what may... (the song from Annie). :ohwell:
 
Awwwhhhhh sweetie ! Don't cry.

Lets see, we can try to narrow your problem down.

Is it breakage (strands themselves breaking)
or
shedding (entire strand coming out of scalp)

thats the cause of it ?

If breaking, you need good detanglers, moister and protein with balance.

If shedding, it's internal...need or iron, eating more vegs and fruits, hormonal, to much stress, not enough sleep...don't take these things lightly, I've experienced these things as the reason I had to chop off 6 inches last year..yes, 6 inches...
 
Aw, honey. (((((huggs to you)))))

I understand how you feel. Just be assured that you will see progress. Everyone has these moments on their hair journey but BE ENCOURAGED.

To feel better, visit some of the member fotkis who have made remarkable progress. (Anky and Jennifermd come to mind)

You can and you will be successful. You probably aren't giving yourself enough credit for what you have already achieved. (we call that 'hair anorexia' and a LOT of us experience it)

Give yourself more time and set some short-term goals. Your trim was a good thing and I'll bet your hair will start thriving now. Chances are, by summer, you'll be in love with your hair!

Love the Annie song, btw. Keep your head up and keep going, sis!
 
Aaawww ((big hugs))

I know where you're coming from !!

But the good news is there's hope !

Keep doing what you're doing !

Smile :)
 
january noir said:
I know that patience is a virtue, but sometimes I just want to cry. I have been doing all I can to make my hair healthier and grow longer, but I still get breakage and I had to cut off 2 inches of my acquired length because it was thin and scraggley looking. I had one patch of hair that was BSL and the rest was just "holding" at SL. The BSL patch was what I had to cut.

I started tracking my hair healtlh and length progress in Noviember (officially) and I feel like I have not achieved any progress. I am just venting right now and I know in a years time all will be good, but I feel so defeated when I see all the luscious heads of hair out there.

I've henna'd, indigo'd, deep conditioned, moisturized, etc., etc. etc. and I don't feel like I am accomplishing my goals.

Yes, it's a pity party that I am giving... but I just had to say it... I am feeling so unattractive right now.

The sun will come out tomorrow, tomorrow, bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow, come what may... (the song from Annie). :ohwell:
Click to expand...

January trust me, i know how you feel. don't be discouraged. when i look at your hair you know what I think? I think to myself I wish I had that much hair. You said you feel defeated when you see luscious heads on hair. I think yours is luscious and I'm being honest. You don't know how much I would like to have your hair right now.

My hair is no where your length or thickness but I have been trying to take care of it. I can't even finger comb my hair without a bunch of it coming out. And it's getting thinner. And today I just discovered I have a bald patch. I looked in the mirror today and I wanted to cry. I really wanted to give up. But I want this too badly to give up. And to be honest i haven't done EVERYTHING to make sure my hair is healthy.

I've learned in life that you have to take things one day at a time.

Things take time. How are you eating habits? healthy hair starts with a healthy diet. What is your regimen?

I'm still learning and I have a longgggggggg way to go with my hair. I want you to know your not alone. You started in november but things do take time.

Have you tried using a light protein every week? There is a thread here about it and I remembered some ladies saying it helps to prevent and curb their breakage. I used to do this years ago and my breakage decreased.

Don't worry. We'll both get to where we want one day. It just takes time. :)
 
Hi, honey!

Aww, don't cry! We've all been in the same boat; it does take time and we have all had setbacks. Like locabouthair said, I wish I had your length! Just continue to listen to your hair, and don't be afraid to try new things; just because a certain method of poo/pre-poo/moisturizer/henna worked for someone else, it still may mean you have to tweak it just for you.

Don't give up on your hair, cause we're not giving up on you! We're here for ya! You're still beautiful, and still one of my hair inspirations! :)

Keep your head up!
 
The ladies are right, im a newbie myself so i can't say that i know how you feel cause i don't. But when you are experiencing these problems, you reach out to LHCF because that what we are here for- to help each other. So you stay encouraged. HTH.
P.S. I see you in all these challenges, im gonna make a note to myself to keep a close eye on you when you do your final update*. Because I know your gonna blow us away!
 
Hey honey,

I know you are doing a great job with your hair just by looking at your pictures. You should not feel like you have not had any progress. Yeah, you had to cut off about 2 inches of hair, but from the time you started your hair journey to now, has your hair improved health wise? Thats progress too sweety, never count that out. Have you been doing something different to your hair that it doesn't agree with? Is the breakage severe?

When I first starting growing my hair out, I had so many set backs because of things I did to my hair in the past and there were times where I felt that I was not making any progress because my length just stayed the same. I didn't realize that my hair wasn't breaking as bad or that the texture felt softer, it was all about getting it longer.

Do not give up. Things will getting better for you, I promise. Just give it more time. Your off to a fresh start with those clean fresh ends!:) Keep babying your hair and you'll be fine.
 
I belive most of us know where you're coming from. But you'll see the results in time. I've had 5" cut at one time and 6" cut in a week. But now my hair is going well and yours will too just hang in there.
 
ok first things first. Don't cut anymore hairs off!! that's very important or you will be stuck at the same length forever. you need to leave your hair alone for a while. stop the henna, the indigo. keep doing the deep conditioners though. you hair needs a break and trust me on this one, you will see progress!
 
(((HUGS)))

I think we all go through that... the joys of being a woman:)

Your hair in looks great on your siggy... I am just trying to get to that length. There will always be some breakage and shedding is normal. Don't get down about lost strands because you still have plenty of hair on your head.;)

You're doing the right things... I think when time passes you will see the positive outcome of your consistent hair care regimen...(this is what I have to tell myself too!):p

cheer up!!
 
Believe me, MANY of us have been there. There was a time when I was feeling so impatient about my hair. Just keep taking gentle care of your hair and you will see results in time. Try to keep it up and tucked away so you don't focus on it. Your will get past this phase and your hair will grow.
 
Aw (((HUGS))) Growing hair has got to be the slowest and frustrating thing EVER. But just know that every day, your hair is growing little by little. Those little milimeters may not seem like very much now, but they add up. Stay strong, and keep doin what you're doin ;)
 
Here are my hugs too !!!

It's not easy for us "40+" women.....but you know what, it's all good. We will have the long, beautiful hair we want, with patience we will get there, you just wait and see...and then, we will be helping the ones who will be struggling and waiting for their time for long hair too!

Blessings!





 
<<<Double Hugs and Kisses>>>

I know exactly how you feel. My hair looks healthier than it has ever been but it is so hard for me to retain length because I cannot stop the breakage. I have tried many products mentioned on the board but I can't seem to catch the culprit. I read a post yesterday about hard water causing breakage so I'm gonna try washing with distilled water and hopefully this will turn things around. My point is you are not alone with the frustration but never give up. I'm gonna keep trying things until this darn high maintainance hair finds something it likes. And from that point, there will be no stopping me.:)
 
HersheyKiss0903 said:
<<<Double Hugs and Kisses>>>

I know exactly how you feel. My hair looks healthier than it has ever been but it is so hard for me to retain length because I cannot stop the breakage. I have tried many products mentioned on the board but I can't seem to catch the culprit. I read a post yesterday about hard water causing breakage so I'm gonna try washing with distilled water and hopefully this will turn things around. My point is you are not alone with the frustration but never give up. I'm gonna keep trying things until this darn high maintainance hair finds something it likes. And from that point, there will be no stopping me.:)
Click to expand...

Have you tried UltraSheen Duotex? Or Mizani H2O nitetime treatment?

Those were excellent in stopping my breakage back some months ago and I still use the Mizani treatment just to keep my hair from breaking at all.
 
The only advise I can give is my own. Stop thinking about your hair. Just do what you need to to keep it healthy and in a cute style and enjoy how beautiful it looks currently and appreciate what you already have (some people like me don't have that). I know because I learned to do this and my hair is taking off. To be honest, your hair is pretty now from the looks of your avatar. Style it and enjoy it. Growth will surely come. ;)
 
*******Hugs*******​

Don't worry. It's going to be fine. Don't cut any more off until you figure what's wrong. You don't know how many times I've grabbed scissors and started chopping thinking I NEEDED to do it.... when in reality I didn't. Try not to cut any more until you figure out what's going on. Wish you all the best.
 
awwww...:kiss:


right before I reached shoulder length I had to cut about an inch of hair. It was nerve wracking and I didn't want to do it, but had to for the health of my hair.

So I got thanked in a big way because it was causing so much breakage and tangling issues.

Sucks to have to cut your hair but, sometimes its for the best.

I get a lil hair anorexia at times too, wonder if I'm not doing something right or not , why my hair looks thin, if I'm shedding too much, blah blah blah...and thats especially true when I look at some of the foki's.

Then I go out and buy a cool looking hair toy and all is right with the world:lol: Hair toys go a long way to making you feel pretty again.

I think you'll make it over this hump and be happy again. You have such nice hair! Its growing, I know you're not thinking it is but it is.


-A
 
Please don't cry! :nono: Be happy! :) I had to cut off 2 1/2 inches of breakage from a bad stylist and I was only 2.5 inches away from BSL! :eek: It's all for the best though.:D It's just hair and it'll grow back! I promise! Be happy about how great it looks now that you cut it!:grin:
 
It will be okay January. I have always thought your hair is doing well and really long. I have had those days where I feel that my hair is acting up, and I usually try not to stress about it. I just continued to do what it is that I have to do to bring it back on the right track. I don't measure or always check for new growths, I just focus on making sure is healthy and that I'm eating healthy. I'm sure your hair is growing, you can just focus on stopping the breakage by moisturizing, deep conditioning, sealing with oil and maybe baggying your ends at night. Good luck to you:)
 
Nice & Wavy said:
Have you tried UltraSheen Duotex? Or Mizani H2O nitetime treatment?

Those were excellent in stopping my breakage back some months ago and I still use the Mizani treatment just to keep my hair from breaking at all.
Click to expand...


So far I have tried seemless combs, ORS Carrot Oil, BB Stretch, and many other things. I do have the Mizani and it does help a little but I still have hairs in my comb. Some have bulbs but many others are just broken hair. I have not however tried UltraSheen Duotex. What is it? Maybe I will pick some up and use it this weekend when I try my first DW wash.
 
thicknlong said:
Awwwhhhhh sweetie ! Don't cry.

Lets see, we can try to narrow your problem down.

Is it breakage (strands themselves breaking)
or
shedding (entire strand coming out of scalp)

thats the cause of it ?

If breaking, you need good detanglers, moister and protein with balance.

If shedding, it's internal...need or iron, eating more vegs and fruits, hormonal, to much stress, not enough sleep...don't take these things lightly, I've experienced these things as the reason I had to chop off 6 inches last year..yes, 6 inches...
Click to expand...

Thanks Thicknlong :kiss: - I am one of the healthiest eaters on the planet! I take all the "necessary" supplements and I don't manipulate my hair except when I wash and condition my hair. Maybe I am just being too hard on myself and feeling down (could be hormones!). I'll continue to baby my hair and monitor my moisture/protein balance, drink more water and exercise more. Maybe that will help.
 
CantBeCopied said:
Aw, honey. (((((huggs to you)))))

I understand how you feel. Just be assured that you will see progress. Everyone has these moments on their hair journey but BE ENCOURAGED.

To feel better, visit some of the member fotkis who have made remarkable progress. (Anky and Jennifermd come to mind)

You can and you will be successful. You probably aren't giving yourself enough credit for what you have already achieved. (we call that 'hair anorexia' and a LOT of us experience it)

Give yourself more time and set some short-term goals. Your trim was a good thing and I'll bet your hair will start thriving now. Chances are, by summer, you'll be in love with your hair!

Love the Annie song, btw. Keep your head up and keep going, sis!
Click to expand...

Thanks for the support and hugs Can'tbeCopied! I was just feeling down and impatient. I will "Woman-Up" and stop being a crybaby! I do have hair and I am grateful to God for that! :yep:
 
Try something new ..start taking a new vit..ie... Vit C or Biotin.
Zinc... mix up a bit
Up your water intake
It will all fall in to place...;)
 
THANK YOU to ALL the Ladies who responded to my cries and held me UP at this difficult time in my hair journey. I wanted to respond to each and every one of you separately, but decided to send out a GROUP HUG to you all.

I was telling CantbeCopied that I was feeling down and impatient and though I have a several "small" setbacks, I really shouldn't complain. My hair has improved with the henna/indigo and other techniques and habits I have incorporated from the advice on this board.

I do eat right (no salt, no sugar, no junk food; I eat fruits, vegetables and simple protein and drink plenty of water, I don't use heat, don't comb excessively only when I detangle after deep conditioning, don't own a brush, I stretch to 8 weeks (anything more than that is break-city!), I take ALL the necessary supplements (when I walk you can hear the pills and capsules jiggling in my tummy :lol: )

I don't self-relax. I moisturize 2x a day and seal with oils. I deep condition at LEAST once a week. I don't scrub or shampoo my hair vigorously. I only rollerset once every 2 months and I don't pull my hair tight when wearing it back.

I Do henna/indigo, cassia and amla and it has helped improve the look and condition my hair. It's shiny and appears thicker and the grays are covered and I love the color of my hair now. Before I hated it! It was soooooo drab. I don't use ACV or lemon juice in my mixes (I believe in keeping it simple); just water and a teaspoon of orange juice.

I could go on and on and on. Really, I do baby my hair. I guess this is just a phase and it will get better.

I love you all for your concern and caring and it's times like this that I am REALLY happy to be a member of this board!
 
It will be alright. Your hair is really pretty and healthy looking. Sometimes it seems that the grass is always greener on the other side ,but Just keep up your good work and you will see that all is not in vain.
 
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