So Your Hair Got Jacked Up!..Is It Really The Stylists Fault Or YOUR Fault??

[MizAvalon]

I agee with most of what has been said.

If you don't do your homework, go in first for a wash/poo to test the place out, ask to be turned towards the mirror, know your hairs specific weaknesses or needs, etc. it's going to be your fault.

If the stylist doesn't listen, lies about a skill, or is focused on making more money then doing a good job and your hair suffers it is the stylists fault.

There is a fine line between being proactive and dictating to someone how to do their job and I think the latter should be avoided.

Let me explain with two examples of stylists being at fault with my hair:

With the first I was 12 (just turned 12), my mother took me to a salon (JCP Penny's). I needed a touch-up and flat-ironing.

To a stylist RECOMMENDED By a family member.

My mother said to her in plain english:

NO trim. NO scissors.

Towards the end, after the wash as the stylist was flatironing my hair. My mother stepped just outside the door to chat with a friend who came by. Ten minutes later, she came back and saw my hair on the floor. To this DAY I remember other women looking at the stylist and me and the giggling and making smug faces during the 10 minute period, but didn't understand why.

The stylist had cut off 8 inches of hair UNEVENLY all around. My mother horrified demanded to know why she'd put scissors in my hair.

The stylist said: She didn't need all that hair. With her color it's not a big deal anyway (I am knocking on the biege door).

It took me 5 years to go back to a salon. Which led to experience number two:

ANOTHER highly recommened stylsit by two friends and family saw me to have a touch-up. I was going on seventeen and THIS time I was not going to have my hair cut off.

She sat me down and I said: TURN ME TO THE MIRROR. So she did, no issues. After the touch-up, I said: NO TRIMS. My hair has ALREADY been trimmed.

She asked: How long ago?

I said: LAST week.

She proceeds to comb my hair/detangle with conditioner. We're chatting and I keep noticing while one hand is in my hair the other keeps dipping up and down. As I keep looking I see a FLASH OF SILVER.

Scissors! SCISSORS. She was using my HEAD to block me from seeing her using scissors. She must've noticed my horrified expression because she suddenly thrust something them into her apron.

I immediately looked at the floor -SHE HAD SWEPT JUST BEFORE I SAT IN HER CHAIR. There was now TWO INCHES OF HAIR, my hair, on the floor. Seeing my obvious, rising anger she quickly stopped what she was doing with my hair and swept the floor with a silly little grin.

I could hardly believe what had happened.



In these two cases, I think the stylists were at fault: They were given clear instructions, highly recommended, and in the second case watched like a hawk. For me to do anything else would have been for me to dictate to them how to do their job on my hair. If that is the case I should go DIY. Which I have. If you can't follow the direction: NO SCISSORS PERIOD. The fault lies with you, the stylist.

To this day I only let my hair be trimmed by men (if it needs trimming) which up til this point (of those who have done my trims) actually don't want to take off as much as I'd ask! Aside from trimming I've also gone fully DIY. I'm also looking to master trims as well so I don't need a stylist for anything. I work too hard to keep my hair healthy and if I have to darn near hold your hand to protect my hair FROM YOU then I don't need to go to a salon.

Both of these stories have me boiling!

Please tell me your Mom beat that lady's tail! Or at least cursed her out?

 

[Kirei]

IDK...


If I was a stylist and you were eye balling me and asking me all kinds of quesions like "Isn't it time for my rinse?" in my place of business, I would be upset. To me, that's rude.

If I was cutting your hair and you watched my like a hawk I would probably stop and ask you to leave, same if I was working in fast food and making a burger, I don't need you to hover over me.IMO, you just don't do that to someone, either you trust them or you don't.

Ex. My mother in law needs someone to take care fo her hair, I could do it but, I am not b/c I don't need her questioning everything I do and acting all scary, either she wants me to do it or she doesn't.

If you have to hawk eye people and remind them that it's time to rinse, then you shouldn't be going to them. Let people do their job, if your hair is sooo precious you should do it yourself. You are taking a risk regardless.

Yes, I am spending my hard earned green but, I am not there to teach someone how to do their job or else someone needs to be paying me. If you can do the job so well then, do it yourself.

If everyone could or were interested in educating themselves we wouldn't need stylist or hair care specialists. You entrust them to keep your hair healthy not everyone has time to be worried about their hair so they entrust that so someone else. If you find that you can't trust anyone then, do it yourself if not, repsect people in their place of business.

 

[Menina Preta]

IDK...


If I was a stylist and you were eye balling me and asking me all kinds of quesions like "Isn't it time for my rinse?" in my place of business, I would be upset. To me, that's rude.

If I was cutting your hair and you watched my like a hawk I would probably stop and ask you to leave, same if I was working in fast food and making a burger, I don't need you to hover over me.IMO, you just don't do that to someone, either you trust them or you don't.

Hmm, I disagree. Anyone I'm paying to perform a service for me, I watch them and/or ask questions. If you show you're a savvy, watchful customer, you are less likely to be given poor service. There is a way to do it though, and it isn't barking at your stylist "hey, what's that?! what are you putting in my hair?" each time she touches a bottle. Instead, be aware of what's around you and just ask casually "Oh, what's this? It smells good..." blah blah.

 

[JustKiya]

Honestly, I don't think it has anything to do with respecting the stylists skills - if she's that good, I'll never even have to ask a question, because she's on top of things

"Okay, I'm about to use some blahblahblah"
"Okay, this is how much you wanted cut, correct?"
"Okay, you've got 5 more minutes under the dryer...."

.....and if she is slipping, what exactly am I respecting her for? Doing a substandard job?

A good 'anything' should respect any customer who is actively interested in the process, and is educated enough to do more than just sit there and be 'done' to - those customers usually don't come back complaining (or drag your name through the dirt) unreasonably, because they were actually involved in the process.

I don't trust anyone until they have proven that they are trustworthy. I wouldn't be hawk-eying the stylist I've gone to for 10 years - if I've gone to her for that long, I know she's trustworthy.

Walking into a brand new shop though? There are too many sad stories about misunderstandings/out and out errors for me to be comfortable just laying back and 'trusting' that they will do me right for the first couple of sessions - esp. considering how 'easy' it is to make a simple mistake that will haunt your for months....

Guess that's why I haven't seen the inside of a salon in over ten years, though.

 

[tbaby_8]

I'm like this, if I am cutting your hair and you are eye balling me, I am going to get the mirror and show you what I have cut or cut and let it stay in my hand and then show you so that will ease your mind. If you still eye ball me after that, then It lets me know that I may or may not be the stylist for you.

I don't have problems with a client asking me questions about what I am doing to their hair, but it is how you ask the question. If you are rude, then of course I am going to have an attitude, but if you ask like you are being inquisitive and really interested in what I am doing, then I will be glad to tell you. I try and tell you anyway so that you will know, but I have noticed that alot of clients aren't paying attention to what I am saying.

You have to understand that just like everybody else, that some stylist are required to get continuing education and some are not and do not care to further the education and learn other methods. They are stuck in their ways and will not change. Then their are a few, a small and select few, that want to further their education to improve their skill.

You, the client, have to take the initative to learn and do a little research, just like you would the opinion of a doctor. Just a thought.

 

[Tarae]

At this point, if I go to a salon and something horrible happens to my hair, it's my fault. I know "right from wrong", I know what I want, and there is nothing wrong with stopping a stylist when they are doing something to YOUR hair that you explicitly told them NOT to do. If you don't speak up, you're just as responsible as the stylist.

But I have been on hair boards for a while and I think I am pretty knowledgeable about proper hair practices (at least when it comes to my own hair).

The last two times I went to the Dominican salon, I saw relaxers and dyes left on for too long. The ladies never told the stylists "hey, rinse this out", probably because they trusted that the stylist knew best. It's unfortunate but some people really don't know. But I think with anything, not just hair, you have to know proper techniques and express what you want because even though the person providing the service is supposed to be professional, mistakes can be made. I haven't seen any cases of outright sabotage though. I can't speak on that.

 

[Kirei]

Hmm, I disagree. Anyone I'm paying to perform a service for me, I watch them and/or ask questions. If you show you're a savvy, watchful customer, you are less likely to be given poor service. There is a way to do it though, and it isn't barking at your stylist "hey, what's that?! what are you putting in my hair?" each time she touches a bottle. Instead, be aware of what's around you and just ask casually "Oh, what's this? It smells good..." blah blah.

Asking questions to me isn't rude but, being saddity is what I am talking about. I do ask questions but, I do acknowledge that I trust them (someone doing service for me).

I guess I don't understand, if someone is so knowledgable about haircare and knows that the typical stylist will use all kinds of products on your hair, why go to them? If you know they will over trim, why not do it yourself instead of going their to, IMO, insult them. Sitting there going "ONLY TRIM 1/8 of an inch?" to me that's rude, I would tell you to do it your dang self for all that.

You are correct your paying someone to do a service for you so IMO you need to let them do that service. If you can't let them do then, don't go.

 

[MonPetite]

Both of these stories have me boiling!

Please tell me your Mom beat that lady's tail! Or at least cursed her out?

She was in too much shock. I don't think she paid for it though.

 

[Irresistible]

I agree with so many of the posts on this thread

I had the same hair dresser from 17 years old on, he gave me my first real salon relaxer, he was like family which had its up sides and down sides, he pressed it when I went natural and wanted a press since I couldnt do it to save my life, his blow drying was brutal but always got my hair straight, we argued like family , loved each other like family, I would get on his nerves , he would act like he knew everything about hair and it became routine, we had this little thing, if I said 'ouch' in his chair and anybody heard me and was looking he would say 'your hair is nappy' every single time. It was comical at best. But watching him I learned how to press my hair and I have not had my butt in his chair for several years now. He has somewhat taken it personal that I havent come back but learning for myself has improved my hair tremendously , leaving out the blow dryer-plus him being a stylist, he liked the blunt look on the ends-the finished look for him. I did too because it really did look good, but I was getting nowhere in length to afford him his need for blunt ends. I'm glad I became a DIY'er because I also knew if anything happened with him I would never go to another hair dresser, so I had to learn. He didnt know I was eyeing everything he did those last several times in his chair

I just will not sit in anybody's chair ever again for anything!

 

[ladylibra]

i used to cuss my SO out for spending $25 every week to get his hair cut at the barber shop (went twice a week), only to come home and have to fix it himself because the barber gave him an uneven fade or crooked line. i guess because my auntie was my stylist growing up, and she taught me not to take BS from stylists. i've walked out on many idiots, with wet hair and half my head in curlers. DON'T CARE!

the stories that get me the most are the ones where naturals say they went to get their hair braided or straightened, and the stylist comes at them with a fine-tooth comb to detangle. HELLOOOOOOO RED FLAG YOU KNOW BETTER! why are you still sitting in the chair letting them rip your hair out, then complain about it here later?

 

[ladylibra]

IDK...


If I was a stylist and you were eye balling me and asking me all kinds of quesions like "Isn't it time for my rinse?" in my place of business, I would be upset. To me, that's rude.

If I was cutting your hair and you watched my like a hawk I would probably stop and ask you to leave, same if I was working in fast food and making a burger, I don't need you to hover over me.IMO, you just don't do that to someone, either you trust them or you don't.

Ex. My mother in law needs someone to take care fo her hair, I could do it but, I am not b/c I don't need her questioning everything I do and acting all scary, either she wants me to do it or she doesn't.

If you have to hawk eye people and remind them that it's time to rinse, then you shouldn't be going to them. Let people do their job, if your hair is sooo precious you should do it yourself. You are taking a risk regardless.

Yes, I am spending my hard earned green but, I am not there to teach someone how to do their job or else someone needs to be paying me. If you can do the job so well then, do it yourself.

If everyone could or were interested in educating themselves we wouldn't need stylist or hair care specialists. You entrust them to keep your hair healthy not everyone has time to be worried about their hair so they entrust that so someone else. If you find that you can't trust anyone then, do it yourself if not, repsect people in their place of business.

i understand what you're saying, but a stylist's job is not to care about the health of my hair. his or her job is to STYLE my hair. all they care about is that the final outcome "looks" good. i honestly DO trust my stylist to cut my hair, she could turn me away from the mirror the entire time if she wanted. but she doesn't and i respect her for that. but the first time she did it, i did pay attention to how she was cutting my hair. doesn't mean i was staring her down the whole time like "don't you DARE mess up or i'll stab you with the scissors!"

their job is to make my hair look good. my job is to keep it healthy. just like when you go out to eat and have your meal modified. they usually cook it so it will taste good, not necessarily so it will be good for you. but if you request they can oftentimes cook it a little differently for you... yeah you could make it at home yourself instead of inconveniencing the chefs on the line. but as long as your requests aren't way out in left field and you're not rude/demanding about it, most people are willing to work with you.

 

[Ms Lala]

I
ANOTHER highly recommened stylsit by two friends and family saw me to have a touch-up. I was going on seventeen and THIS time I was not going to have my hair cut off.

She sat me down and I said: TURN ME TO THE MIRROR. So she did, no issues. After the touch-up, I said: NO TRIMS. My hair has ALREADY been trimmed.

She asked: How long ago?

I said: LAST week.

She proceeds to comb my hair/detangle with conditioner. We're chatting and I keep noticing while one hand is in my hair the other keeps dipping up and down. As I keep looking I see a FLASH OF SILVER.

Scissors! SCISSORS. She was using my HEAD to block me from seeing her using scissors. She must've noticed my horrified expression because she suddenly thrust something them into her apron.

I immediately looked at the floor -SHE HAD SWEPT JUST BEFORE I SAT IN HER CHAIR. There was now TWO INCHES OF HAIR, my hair, on the floor. Seeing my obvious, rising anger she quickly stopped what she was doing with my hair and swept the floor with a silly little grin.

I could hardly believe what had happened.


In these two cases, I think the stylists were at fault: They were given clear instructions, highly recommended, and in the second case watched like a hawk. For me to do anything else would have been for me to dictate to them how to do their job on my hair. If that is the case I should go DIY. Which I have. If you can't follow the direction: NO SCISSORS PERIOD. The fault lies with you, the stylist.
.

Girl you have had some crazy experiences w/stylists. I think I might have hurt somebody over the 2nd story though, that lady was being spiteful.

 

[Reinventing21]

I agee with most of what has been said.

If you don't do your homework, go in first for a wash/poo to test the place out, ask to be turned towards the mirror, know your hairs specific weaknesses or needs, etc. it's going to be your fault.

If the stylist doesn't listen, lies about a skill, or is focused on making more money then doing a good job and your hair suffers it is the stylists fault.

There is a fine line between being proactive and dictating to someone how to do their job and I think the latter should be avoided.

Let me explain with two examples of stylists being at fault with my hair:

With the first I was 12 (just turned 12), my mother took me to a salon (JCP Penny's). I needed a touch-up and flat-ironing.

Those two women were EVIL and were both at fault. How incredibly mean spirited, not to mention the other clients who laughed. Just a reminder to ladies, don't leave your daughters alone with stylists.

Also, if my daughter told me what happened to you, I would probably have called the police and charged her with assault. (May sound extreme but I would have been so outraged at the maliciousness of it) The law really does not play with this sort of stuff as is evidenced in some of the court cases where it was proven the stylist had bad intent.

Every situation is so different, but a stylist is like a doctor or mechanic. In the past they were like God in that no one questioned much and just expected them to know all, but now with all the access to information, people are paying more attention to what's being done, and asking more questions. In the end that means that the professionals will have to be just that--professionals.

 

[bermudabeauty]

Overall - It depends.

In my case...it was 100% the stylist's fault.

20pearls girl.......the picture in your avitar is the reason why I keep cutting my hair. Please change that sexy short sexy hair pic you are messing up my progress. LOL

To answer the question of the thread. I think the majority of the time it is our fault that our hair is messed up because good maintance is the key to healthy hair.