So... I think I might Fall Off the Wagon

[bravenewgirl87]

I just can't take it anymore. All this natural talk is starting to stress me! This was supposed to be easier and i am not seeing too many results besides hard, tangled. uncombable hair. I have wanted to be natural for soooo long, but i can't take transitioning anymore. When am I going to see some results? And what does s-curl, carefree curl, jheri curl juice do? I don't think my hair is ever going to look good. I think I am going to relax... not me, but my hair. I just want results!!!!!

 

[Divalicious]

Awwww, I'm sorry to hear that but you gotta do what's best for *you*. I don't use s-curl, carefree curl and jerri curl juice but I think some people use it for moisture and curl definition.

 

[Cheleigh]

How long have you been transitioning?

 

[klb120475]

I just can't take it anymore. All this natural talk is starting to stress me! This was supposed to be easier and i am not seeing too many results besides hard, tangled. uncombable hair. I have wanted to be natural for soooo long, but i can't take transitioning anymore. When am I going to see some results? And what does s-curl, carefree curl, jheri curl juice do? I don't think my hair is ever going to look good. I think I am going to relax... not me, but my hair. I just want results!!!!!

I understand. I transitioned for 9 months, then fell off the wagon last month and gotta relaxer.

 

[glamazon386]

I've never tried s curl or any of those things. Your hair just may not like them. I find that my hair doesn't like oily products. They make my hair feel dry and like crap. I use creamy products. What else are you using?

 

[HoneyDew]

I dunno about the Jheri Curl juice, but who the yumminess in your siggie.

 

[preciousjewel76]

Yeah, like bmore said, what specific problems are you having? Ultimately, the decision is yours, but I'm sure some here could offer suggestions if you're having a certain type of problem with your natural hair.

 

[Divine Inspiration]

Awwww, I'm sorry to hear that but you gotta do what's best for *you*.

Either way, you need to be completely happy with your hair and your decision. Don't be "stressed" about it...our hair is supposed to be (at least IMO) fun and interesting not stressful and bothersome. Have you read the Transitioner's Support Thread? Maybe you could PM some of the natural veterans to get some ideas.

What is your current regimen and what exactly are you after? Detangling? Definition? Moisture?

With all the resources available here at LHCF, I'm sure we can help you get to a better place.

 

[bLackButtaFly]

ultimately it's your choice. Being natural is not for everyone. I think I remember your post b4 about when you'll see curls. Not every product is for everyone, and people use different things to get the results they want. And the truth is just b/c you perm doesn't mean you'll instantly the results you want, unless the result you want is straight hair. Your hair will probably grow at the same rate, if you're looking for length.
I dealt with dry hair especially the ends until I bc'd and up until that time so I wouldn't have short hair I wore braids, and twists or weaves/ wigs. Do that for a few months until your hair grows out, you'll be pleased with the growth, you get your hair off your mind, and youll give those relaxed strands a break which will lessen the breakage. I think this is what most of the ladies here are doing on the transitioner support thread. Then when you have more hair you'll be more able to try products and see what works for you b/c you'll b e able to see you real texture. Heck take a break from your hair, just bun it for awhile that way it won't be like waiting for water to boil.

 

[bravenewgirl87]

Michael Copon is his name, from "Beyond The Break" on The N. I use Kids Organics, but now the back is getting so dry and hard that not even that is helping. After the blowout/trim this weekend, the name where all the relaxed ends are gone is getting kinky and coiler, but rough and won't hold heat and is hard to curl. My problem is maintaining style. Even if i style my hair in a super cute afro (I stick tiny twisty rods in them and pull the curls apart), come tomorrow its a hard stiff mess. If i go in the shower to let the steam help it, the back where all the relaxed ends are off stays in style but the top melts. Basically, this makes rollersetting hard to keep. If i get it pressed or curled same thing happens. I can't get it straightened with my iron bc my hair is too thick. Its too short in the back for bunning... and micros are so hard to take out. I think i might get a sew in... But then you can't really wear that up w/o showing tracks!!! HELP!!!!

PS. Did i mention that i don't use wrapping lotion? Is that a problem?

 

[bravenewgirl87]

How long have you been transitioning?

I've only been FULLY transitioning for 5 mos.

 

[preciousjewel76]

When was the last time you clarified your hair? Some of the Africa's Best products have cones in them, which build up and make it impossible (at least for me) to style my hair. They make my hair dry over time, to. Just a suggestion. Wash all that stuff out and start over.

 

[Robin41]

I've only been FULLY transitioning for 5 mos.

You are exactly in the make or break stage of transitioning, in my opinion, so this will most likely be as hard as it will get to manage your hair. Also, I think if you're constantly putting heat on it to make it straight, #1, you're causing damage and #2, it will just take that much longer to learn what your natural hair needs.

I agree with the posters who said maybe you should do protective styles, maybe braids or twists, to get your mind off it for a while.

Good luck!

 

[Divine Inspiration]

You are exactly in the make or break stage of transitioning, in my opinion, so this will most likely be as hard as it will get to manage your hair. Also, I think if you're constantly putting heat on it to make it straight, #1, you're causing damage and #2, it will just take that much longer to learn what your natural hair needs.

I agree with the posters who said maybe you should do protective styles, maybe braids or twists, to get your mind off it for a while.

Good luck!

I agree. I went 16 months without texlaxing, and it DEFINITELY got easier after month 6 or 7. Part of that was me not properly detangling, but it was also me not understanding what types of products my hair wanted. It does NOT like cones, but I was steady using cone-laden moisturizers...I just didn't get it.

OP, maybe you should experiment with some different products...this changed the game for me.

Also, if you simply want relaxed hair, then get relaxed hair. Perhaps you're just realizing that you would rather be relaxed, but if you genuinely want to be natural and are just having a hard time, keep at it for at least another 30 days...that's enough time for you to mentally be sure that a relaxer is what you want and it'll also give you time to try some new products/techniques.

 

[sholly6]

It takes time to get use to natural hair be incourage on your journey. I have been natural for the past ten yrs and I love it. Some times you have to use different products and see want your hair likes. In any case you should enjoy your hair journey, so try not to stress yourself out it will get better in time.

 

[naijamerican]

OP, maybe you should experiment with some different products...this changed the game for me.

Also, if you simply want relaxed hair, then get relaxed hair. Perhaps you're just realizing that you would rather be relaxed, but if you genuinely want to be natural and are just having a hard time, keep at it for at least another 30 days...that's enough time for you to mentally be sure that a relaxer is what you want and it'll also give you time to try some new products/techniques.

I totally agree with DI on this. As I said in another thread, I firmly believe that having natural hair is not for everyone. I have it and have had it for years. Whereas before I used to be as militant as some folks on that site that shall remain nameless , I have, in the past couple of years, realized that you have to do what's best for you.

The other thing that Divine suggested, about trying other products, is a great idea as well. I don't know what's in the Africa's Best products but personally, I tend to favor organic, natural lines. My hair is 4A, with some 4B, and very, very coily. It desires creamy products and butters. I know that many women here (relaxed and natural alike) have found success with such lines as Oyin, Qhemet Biologics, My Honeychild, Jane Carter Solutions, J/A/S/O/N, Aubrey Organics, Carol's Daughter - the list goes on and on! Even trying 100% shea butter may solve some of your dryness woes.

And it's okay that you're still figuring it out. I just realized this year that my entire body (face and hair) responds very well to Olive Oil, so now that's one of the main ingredients I look for in my hair styling and maintainence products. And I just discovered two days ago that my hair likes Coconut oil, so now, I'm going to look for that, too!

I am sorry for the long post but please don't despair. Just do what's best for you, and in the meantime, whatever you decide to do with your hair, experiment with different lines. Good luck!

 

[bLackButtaFly]

ITA w/ what everyone hads said. I think it's really imprtant to try new products and see what works for you. And if you get braids it doesn't have to be micros, they should be large espcially on natural hair so that you don't have as much breakage. Pencil sized no smaller. That'll make it alot easier to take out. Also try twists, kinky or whatever, they're a cute way to transition. I also agree that if you keep straightening it, you will damge your hair, so if you only want ot wear your hair straight then maybe you should just relax, your hair not yourself.

 

[glamazon386]

ultimately it's your choice. Being natural is not for everyone. I think I remember your post b4 about when you'll see curls. Not every product is for everyone, and people use different things to get the results they want. And the truth is just b/c you perm doesn't mean you'll instantly the results you want, unless the result you want is straight hair. Your hair will probably grow at the same rate, if you're looking for length.
I dealt with dry hair especially the ends until I bc'd and up until that time so I wouldn't have short hair I wore braids, and twists or weaves/ wigs. Do that for a few months until your hair grows out, you'll be pleased with the growth, you get your hair off your mind, and youll give those relaxed strands a break which will lessen the breakage. I think this is what most of the ladies here are doing on the transitioner support thread. Then when you have more hair you'll be more able to try products and see what works for you b/c you'll b e able to see you real texture. Heck take a break from your hair, just bun it for awhile that way it won't be like waiting for water to boil.

I agree with everything BlackButtaFly said. It might just be the products bravenewgirl. I had the same problem with some products. People here rave about Suave naturals and scurl and all these other things. My hair did not like Suave products. I never tried scurl or anything like that. I just wasn't interested in trying that. It seems like oils and greasier products I just can't use. If it feels greasy/oily it'll make my hair look like a greasy bush and make it feel like straw. I had to learn what my hair liked and didn't like and that was only through trial and error. I say stick it out a little longer. If it doesn't work out, then go ahead and do what you feel you need to do. At least that way you will have at least tried. Why don't you try a weave or some braids? That'll get your mind off it for a little while.