so i had a conversation with a much older lady....(semi long story)

[jaszymeen]

so i had a conversation with an older lady UPDATE

...on sunday before church and she was like back in my day (insert 15 min. story here)....then we hit the relaxer subject and i explained i use lye because my hair thrives better on it and its much softer and she goes "well whats wrong with the $5 box relaxer and you must can take lye better then most people because nobody can use a lye perm and you have to use a super"perplexederplexed when i did use box relaxers i had to use a super BUT since switching to Mizani i can use a regular. and she looks at my sisters hair and goes "well i can see her growth and she needs to relax every 4 weeks because your hair breaks off when you dont put that relaxer on there right away" (we all know the proper answer to this one based on your own hair). but the one thing that really got me was when i said that i washed my hair everyday with conditioner and she immediately "thats not good at all, it'll dry your hair out and you can't do that it's been scientifically proven" and i'm thinking well what scientist proved this cuz thats not true at all


UPDATE
so yesterday she gets on the hair again. my younger sister just wore her hair down and parted to the side and the lady goes "i like your hair like that. it looks good." i was wearing a wash and go kinda and she looks at my head and goes "you need to work on that" so i go first of all ...and then i stop myself because who is she to have me justify my hair to she then informs that she's gonna rinse her hair and then apply her relaxer :| you can't put a relaxer on wet hair lady but oh well her fault

 

[MizAvalon]

I can't even fault her for her way of thinking. She's older and that's what they were taught in her day, of course she's going to say stuff like that.

I don't pay people like that(old or young) any mind. I know what works for my hair and it speaks for itself.

How old was she, by the way?

 

[Khaiya]

Well my Mom isn't that much older and she believes the same things, i dont know if its an age thing, its just what you learn cause i have a friend 2 years younger than me and she almost fainted hen i told her i washed every other day, she was so concerned about my hair being dry and stuff. A lot of black women just seem to have this idea, not just the older ones. Lord knows i had the same ideas before i found the hair boards.

 

[Kiki82]

...on sunday before church and she was like back in my day (insert 15 min. story here)....then we hit the relaxer subject and i explained i use lye because my hair thrives better on it and its much softer and she goes "well whats wrong with the $5 box relaxer and you must can take lye better then most people because nobody can use a lye perm and you have to use a super"perplexederplexed when i did use box relaxers i had to use a super BUT since switching to Mizani i can use a regular. and she looks at my sisters hair and goes "well i can see her growth and she needs to relax every 4 weeks because your hair breaks off when you dont put that relaxer on there right away" (we all know the proper answer to this one based on your own hair). but the one thing that really got me was when i said that i washed my hair everyday with conditioner and she immediately "thats not good at all, it'll dry your hair out and you can't do that it's been scientifically proven" and i'm thinking well what scientist proved this cuz thats not true at all

LMAO!!!

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

I can't even fault her for her way of thinking. She's older and that's what they were taught in her day, of course she's going to say stuff like that.

I don't pay people like that(old or young) any mind. I know what works for my hair and it speaks for itself.

How old was she, by the way?

When I read the op i read it it a grandmother voice

 

[Evolving78]

my mother thinks the same way. bless her heart!

 

[Evolving78]

When I read the op i read it it a grandmother voice

"Oh no baby, dat washin you head too much, gonna make it fall out"!

 

[Evolving78]

delete.....

 

[LongiLox]

Did you correct her when she said all this stuff?

 

[Tonya T]

I'm sorry but I would have corrected/inform her. Its time folks know the truth about their hair.

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

"Oh no baby, dat washin you head too much, gonna make it fall out"!

You stoopid!!!!

Thanks for the laugh!

 

[SmartyPants]

...on sunday before church and she was like back in my day (insert 15 min. story here)....then we hit the relaxer subject and i explained i use lye because my hair thrives better on it and its much softer and she goes "well whats wrong with the $5 box relaxer and you must can take lye better then most people because nobody can use a lye perm and you have to use a super"perplexederplexed when i did use box relaxers i had to use a super BUT since switching to Mizani i can use a regular. and she looks at my sisters hair and goes "well i can see her growth and she needs to relax every 4 weeks because your hair breaks off when you dont put that relaxer on there right away" (we all know the proper answer to this one based on your own hair). but the one thing that really got me was when i said that i washed my hair everyday with conditioner and she immediately "thats not good at all, it'll dry your hair out and you can't do that it's been scientifically proven" and i'm thinking well what scientist proved this cuz thats not true at all

Rule #1: Do not argue with old people!

 

[Lucky's Mom]

...on sunday before church and she was like back in my day (insert 15 min. story here)....then we hit the relaxer subject and i explained i use lye because my hair thrives better on it and its much softer and she goes "well whats wrong with the $5 box relaxer and you must can take lye better then most people because nobody can use a lye perm and you have to use a super"perplexederplexed when i did use box relaxers i had to use a super BUT since switching to Mizani i can use a regular. and she looks at my sisters hair and goes "well i can see her growth and she needs to relax every 4 weeks because your hair breaks off when you dont put that relaxer on there right away" (we all know the proper answer to this one based on your own hair). but the one thing that really got me was when i said that i washed my hair everyday with conditioner and she immediately "thats not good at all, it'll dry your hair out and you can't do that it's been scientifically proven" and i'm thinking well what scientist proved this cuz thats not true at all

It's a wonder people are not completley bald with all of the mythology out there...

 

[Lucky's Mom]

I'm sorry but I would have corrected/inform her. Its time folks know the truth about their hair.

Um... Have you talked to any 'elders' lately????? They are not trying to hear what we have to say.

 

[BostonMaria]

Once people have their mind set a certain way its hard to make them listen. My mom, God bless her, asked me to buy her a flatiron because "back in the 60's she used a hot comb and her hair was long and thick" She is older now and her hair has been falling out. I know its because of hair dye. I've given her Shikakai, deep conditioners, oils, Amla... you name it and I've given it to her. Its all in her bathroom collecting dust.

 

[heyfranz]

Oh, please, I thought that way last year - before LHCF. I thought if you used lye you must be crazy. Same thing for washing your hair every day. And using condish to wash??? I would've been looking at you thinking "crazy girl".

 

[chebaby]

older people think that way. im 22 and the lady who used to do my hair is in her 70s and i have been going to her since i was 14. when i cut all my hair off she was disgusted lol. she kept saying "oh my gawd" lmao. then she kept saying "we gonna have to put something on them roots to get em straight". i was like nooooo that was the whole reason for me going natural. then she said that relaxers arent harsh chemicals, its the perms that are bad. i just kept SMH.

 

[jaszymeen]

I can't even fault her for her way of thinking. She's older and that's what they were taught in her day, of course she's going to say stuff like that.

I don't pay people like that(old or young) any mind. I know what works for my hair and it speaks for itself.

How old was she, by the way?

she's gotta be in her mid 60's

Did you correct her when she said all this stuff?

i didnt really correct her i just gave her information on MY hair and why i do the things i do and just explained some stuff

 

[jaszymeen]

It's a wonder people are not completley bald with all of the mythology out there...

thats what i was thinking especially since she used a permanent color and relaxer on the same day and then it didnt take so she said she used a rinse and it turned her hair greenperplexederplexed i told her that she really shouldnt do that and there's hair rinses and such formulated for grays.

older people think that way. im 22 and the lady who used to do my hair is in her 70s and i have been going to her since i was 14. when i cut all my hair off she was disgusted lol. she kept saying "oh my gawd" lmao. then she kept saying "we gonna have to put something on them roots to get em straight". i was like nooooo that was the whole reason for me going natural. then she said that relaxers arent harsh chemicals, its the perms that are bad. i just kept SMH.

i dont understand that lol. if a relaxer isnt a chemical i would like to know what she calls it.

 

[Nice Lady]

It makes no sense to correct her because she is kinda of set in her ways. The best walking advertisement is attaining results of super long hair and then, tell her. She don't know better and she is repeating the lies that we have been told for years. That's crazy.

 

[jaszymeen]

Once people have their mind set a certain way its hard to make them listen. My mom, God bless her, asked me to buy her a flatiron because "back in the 60's she used a hot comb and her hair was long and thick" She is older now and her hair has been falling out. I know its because of hair dye. I've given her Shikakai, deep conditioners, oils, Amla... you name it and I've given it to her. Its all in her bathroom collecting dust.

my mom is the same way she wont use it unless I do it for her.

"Oh no baby, dat washin you head too much, gonna make it fall out"!

lol diary of ms. jane pittman voice lol

 

[PecanCandy]

I'm sorry but I would have corrected/inform her. Its time folks know the truth about their hair.

You know, some people are just not ready for the truth. It never fails, when I try to drop some "knowledge", I am met with so much resistance.

 

[WantNatural]

But let's be honest - before you (and mean anyone reading this) began frequenting hair boards, what black hair myths did you believe? I always heard that if you didn't get a relaxer right on schedule your hair would break off. That schedule varied from person to person, but no one ever explained to me how I could stretch a relaxer or grow out a relaxer for that fact without my hair completely falling out. Stylists probably tell us that to keep us coming on a schedule! And I had always heard and believed that shampooing black hair on a daily basis would only dry it out, as our hair is generally more dry than our caucasian sisters. I always felt like the odd ball because before I got pregnant with my son and found myself too exhausted to deal with my hair except when visiting the salon, I used to wash my hair every 2-3 days. None of my friends or coworkers did this. When I mentioned how often I would wash my hair the comment would always be along the line of the fact that I must have "white" hair or something. They all visited the salon religiously every week or two weeks, and did not touch their hair between visits. That's fine for them, but washing several times a week is just what felt right to me for my hair. I had never heard of cowashing before (and now I cowash 4x per week), or a lot of things before I found LCHF. The knowledge that I have gained has been tremendous, and I'm excited about my decision to transition, which I probably would not have made had it not been for this board, but I'm also not ready to laugh at those that still believe the old myths yet. Who said it - "Once we know better we do better."

 

[MizAvalon]

older people think that way. im 22 and the lady who used to do my hair is in her 70s and i have been going to her since i was 14. when i cut all my hair off she was disgusted lol. she kept saying "oh my gawd" lmao. then she kept saying "we gonna have to put something on them roots to get em straight". i was like nooooo that was the whole reason for me going natural. then she said that relaxers arent harsh chemicals, its the perms that are bad. i just kept SMH.

Wow...see.

Continuing education should be MANDATORY for the practitioners. These outdated practices are what keep women messed up and bald for most of their lives.

 

[areneeh]

That sounds a lot like my aunt. She tells me that African-American's (okay, she said "Black People") can't condition their hair like that because it will fall out. She has never had a relaxer and her hair stays neck length. I listened and was respectful to her and I thought "I will take advance from people with hair GROWTH rather than hair maintenance" and I left it at that. My hair is staying up (until November) so I will let the proof speak for itself! LOL!!!!

 

[MizAvalon]

It makes no sense to correct her because she is kinda of set in her ways. The best walking advertisement is attaining results of super long hair and then, tell her. She don't know better and she is repeating the lies that we have been told for years. That's crazy.

Exactly. But even then when you show them your amazing hair they try to shoot that down and make you seem like you are some kind of anomaly.

I gave up on people like that years ago. Keep walking around with your stupid myths and busted hair. I couldn't care less.

 

[MizAvalon]

That sounds a lot like my aunt. She tells me that African-American's (okay, she said "Black People") can't condition their hair like that because it will fall out. She has never had a relaxer and her hair stays neck length. I listened and was respectful to her and I thought "I will take advance from people with hair GROWTH rather than hair maintenance" and I left it at that. My hair is staying up (until November) so I will let the proof speak for itself! LOL!!!!

That's another thing that truly bothers me. Why is that advice givers have never attained what it is that they are giving advice about? If I want to learn about becoming wealthy I am going to listen to Donald Trump and not Ray Ray sitting on his stoop.

So whether we are talking about finances or hair or anything else, unless you ARE where I want to BE, you have nothing to say to me.

 

[Ivonnovi]

Well this was MORE THAN LIKELY TRUE when relaxers and such 1st came out. Hair care options for "OUR HAIR TYPE" has come a very long way since I could remember (back in the 70's).
Back then we were steadily trying to adapt and use products that were'nt desinged for your hair, and yes many of these shampoos and conditioners were drying. If it did say Johnson&Johnson my mamma woudn't use it on my hair. Natural styles and hair care remedies were shunned when I was comming up.

She's telling you what she "learn't" back in her day; take the time to update her on caring for hair. Then post an update!

 

[Missigirl]

I started trying to correct people, but I decided to wait until I get mid-back and let them ask me what I'm doing.

All of those myths kept my hair the same lenght for 20 years. I think it is a shame our hair care providers are not learning new things or not teaching new things to their customers(us) or ex-customers.

 

[Missigirl]

That's another thing that truly bothers me. Why is that advice givers have never attained what it is that they are giving advice about? If I want to learn about becoming wealthy I am going to listen to Donald Trump and not Ray Ray sitting on his stoop.

This is SO true MizAvalon... Ray Ray knows everything except how to get off that stoop....(oh by the way I have braces too).