This kind of a two-parter....
PART 1
I have this one sisterfriend who kind of comes in and out of my life depending on her situation.... When I say "in and out of my life", there will be occasion where we'll go to events, movies, etc. And then there will be times where we don't associate as often...not because of anything bad, but because life being busy, etc. We're similar in that we both like the "finer" things in life compared to others at our church, meaning we have similar interests in movies, museums, plays, etc. We have both served on the intercessory prayer ministry. We're different in that she has two college-aged children and she's about 4-5 years older than me (although she looks younger at times!), she seems to move around a lot, I've been in school for a while, she's had challenges to finish her bachelor's degree, etc.
But sometimes I wonder if this is someone I can call a (true) friend.... No (thank God), nothing has happened between us where I felt betrayed or anything like that. But sometimes I think she can be a bit flaky...or like she deals with me when it's convenient or when no one else (children, relationship) is around or accessible.... It even seems like I recall somebody (an older woman) saying to me: "She's not your friend"...
"It's like she'll say "hey, let's do this or that" but kinda no follow up.... Latest example was today.... we were attending this women's conference in town.... So at the lunch break, we both were talking to different folk but when it was time to come in, she didn't come back in for a while.... and I was thinking "my goodness, she needs to be in here listening to this speaker! She's great!" So I sent her a text saying "You need to be in here!!!" but she never came in.... So after about an hour later, I had decided that I was gonna leave because the conference was on a different subject area and I had already been there longer than I had anticipated.... So I go outside and she's out talking to the speaker that I wanted her to hear.... So that was good... she got what she needed.... But to myself I was kinda like "I thought we were gonna share this experience in attending this conference together"...not that we need to be joined at the hip but where's the community in this?
A sense of community is something that I'm sensitive about because I usually don't feel like I have it.... it seems like I'm isolated (partly my doing, partly not....), which brings me to the second part: sisterhood....
PART 2
Another sisterfriend (more like a person I was kinda supposed to be mentoring) said that I don't do sisterhood well. I told her that I know that...that that wasn't a secret. She asked why. I said well, I don't have any sisters...I don't know how to do sisterhood. (Shrug).... Maybe this is coming up as I just got back from a women's conference where unity, love and sisterhood are usually the main themes and so it's at the top of my brain....
I do know that my "reluctance" to sisterhood is part of my bigger reluctance to open myself up to people (men and women) out of fear of rejection, ridicule, and hurt/harm.... I consider LCHF as a sisterhood of sorts, but in a way it's not a REAL-LIFE sisterhood because the online environment can only go so far.... but when I see women helping each other and being supportive and encouraging and even connecting together to share resources, networking, business, etc., it's such a beautiful thing and THAT'S WHAT feels good to be a part of....
I just wanted to share this because this weekend did help me see areas of improvement in my life. I do believe that when I KNOW better, I (can and shall) DO better....
Thank you for listening/reading....
PART 1
I have this one sisterfriend who kind of comes in and out of my life depending on her situation.... When I say "in and out of my life", there will be occasion where we'll go to events, movies, etc. And then there will be times where we don't associate as often...not because of anything bad, but because life being busy, etc. We're similar in that we both like the "finer" things in life compared to others at our church, meaning we have similar interests in movies, museums, plays, etc. We have both served on the intercessory prayer ministry. We're different in that she has two college-aged children and she's about 4-5 years older than me (although she looks younger at times!), she seems to move around a lot, I've been in school for a while, she's had challenges to finish her bachelor's degree, etc.
But sometimes I wonder if this is someone I can call a (true) friend.... No (thank God), nothing has happened between us where I felt betrayed or anything like that. But sometimes I think she can be a bit flaky...or like she deals with me when it's convenient or when no one else (children, relationship) is around or accessible.... It even seems like I recall somebody (an older woman) saying to me: "She's not your friend"...
"It's like she'll say "hey, let's do this or that" but kinda no follow up.... Latest example was today.... we were attending this women's conference in town.... So at the lunch break, we both were talking to different folk but when it was time to come in, she didn't come back in for a while.... and I was thinking "my goodness, she needs to be in here listening to this speaker! She's great!" So I sent her a text saying "You need to be in here!!!" but she never came in.... So after about an hour later, I had decided that I was gonna leave because the conference was on a different subject area and I had already been there longer than I had anticipated.... So I go outside and she's out talking to the speaker that I wanted her to hear.... So that was good... she got what she needed.... But to myself I was kinda like "I thought we were gonna share this experience in attending this conference together"...not that we need to be joined at the hip but where's the community in this?
A sense of community is something that I'm sensitive about because I usually don't feel like I have it.... it seems like I'm isolated (partly my doing, partly not....), which brings me to the second part: sisterhood....
PART 2
Another sisterfriend (more like a person I was kinda supposed to be mentoring) said that I don't do sisterhood well. I told her that I know that...that that wasn't a secret. She asked why. I said well, I don't have any sisters...I don't know how to do sisterhood. (Shrug).... Maybe this is coming up as I just got back from a women's conference where unity, love and sisterhood are usually the main themes and so it's at the top of my brain....
I do know that my "reluctance" to sisterhood is part of my bigger reluctance to open myself up to people (men and women) out of fear of rejection, ridicule, and hurt/harm.... I consider LCHF as a sisterhood of sorts, but in a way it's not a REAL-LIFE sisterhood because the online environment can only go so far.... but when I see women helping each other and being supportive and encouraging and even connecting together to share resources, networking, business, etc., it's such a beautiful thing and THAT'S WHAT feels good to be a part of....
I just wanted to share this because this weekend did help me see areas of improvement in my life. I do believe that when I KNOW better, I (can and shall) DO better....
Thank you for listening/reading....
