She Really Made me Feel Uncomfortable....

[michaela]

Thursday i decided i needed to go get a press i tried to stay natural and to stay from heat but the littles tangles and knots where so Frustrating i didnt know what to do my mother and sister are really against me when its for the natural 4a hair....im just sick and tired of everything...
i tried the denman brush, Detangling hair in shower with lots of Conditoner , Steam Treatment , Deep Conditoning with heat, Adding oils in Conditoners , Washing Hair in Sections, Co washing. i dont use Shampoo my hair hates shampoo it makes it so dry So i wash my hair with baking soda just the Scalp than i follow up to a Conditoner wash. I dont know how to braid my hair so i just bun it.When My stylist was washing my hair she was telling the other ladies how i started out with No hair and that i have been getting my hair done by her since i was 6 and how she grew my hair long but i start doing my own hair and it not as long anymore when it really was her FAULT!!!! Last Summer i went swimming and the next day i went for a press she got The Blow dryer and Started raking through my hair with it Sadly the middle part of my hair was not as long any more because of HER!!!! IM SICK AND TIRED OF HER!!!!
IT HURTS BADLY EVERYTIME SHE DOES MY HAIR! SHE DOESNT EVEN USE A HEAT PROTECTANT AND THIS TIME MY hair Grew an Inch Thanks to You Ladies with Advice but She Says i Need a trim?
WHAT PRODUCTS TO USE?
SHOULD I STLL GO TO HER?
HELP ME WITH THE TANGLES AND KNOTS!
Thanks for reading this

 

[michaela]

???...erplexed

 

[naturaline]

1st things 1st... DONT go back to her!

use the board and gather infomation on how to care and style your hair yourself. and to pick up extra tips look in lots of albums and find your hair twin, she may have ideas you havent tried yet.

hth
x

 

[Galadriel]

If she makes you feel this horrible, do NOT go to her and pay her to mess up your hair like that! I'm transitioning and have been dealing with how to best detangle, etc. so I can definitely relate. What conditioners are you currently using to co-wash and detangle with?

 

[plastic]

Do you plan to go back to her ? No stylist could ever say that about me and I go back to them .. I wouldn't say anything while her hand is in my head granted she does something to make it break off .. but are you seriously considering going back to her ? After the whole swimming pool -next-day-raking incident I would have found someone else

 

[Wildchild453]

I second the not going back to that woman.

What products are you using? Do you know what your hair likes? How often do you DC? Can you do twists? Have you tried any natural prodcuts.

I see you use baking soda to wash you hair, is that helping? There is a natural on the board who mixes baking soda with conditioner and washes her hair, you can try that method. Not everyone likes the Denman so try using a regular wide tooth comb to detangle and always start at the end and work your way up.

Washing in sections is always your best bet because it keeps you from working on too much hair at one time and also keeps the tangles away.

If you like to straighten your hair every so often do a search on the board for heat protectants, ceramic flat irons, and techniques and remember heat is not your best friend when used improperly.

HTH

 

[nnmiles]

Be sure not to go back to her. Take it from me, one who has prayed that certain stylists would change. Eventually, and unfortunately I learned the hard way. I've had my hair fryed, burned, dyed and chopped off, all because I kept quiet. Now I take care of my own hair. I have learned how and I would never go to another stylist. Although I know there are probably excellent stylists out there, I just don't have the time and money to search. Be blessed in your journey for a new stylist.

 

[Lucky's Mom]

You should never return to this woman.
Period.

 

[ShiShiPooPoo]

Awwww. I could feel your frustration coming from your post

Don't go back...she'll only try to damage your self-esteem.

 

[luckiestdestiny]

Edit update: not using denman anymore...damaging in the long run to my fine hair. But the rest is still the same.

I'm natural by the way.
My advice is as follows:
With the denman...I never use it to detangle. I use a comb to detangle, then the denman to smooth. Also for the tangles and knots, if you are not opposed to shampoo, find the original creme of nature in the white and green bottle. They just discontinued it but it's at Sally's (I scooped up the last few bottles after I got a heads up on this site). Also a good detangler that has helped me when my hair was super tangled is this: I found this at Walgreens in the kids hair section and there is nothing that compares to it detangling (that I've found))...Nothing. It's by Dark and Lovely it's called Beautiful Begginnings Kids Ouchless Detangler. On the container which has a purple top and is silver with purple and pink writing it says (Dramatically reduces knots, breakage, and tuggling for relaxed and natural hair). I does what it says. It's cheap, and it works better than just detangling with conditioner. Spray it on the knots, wait a minute or two, before detangling. It even works better than oils or conditioners for detangling. My goal is to have as little hair on the ground as possible, and keep most of it in my hair!

Last thing, if your hair gets too tangled, and you're putting it in a bun, and it's past a certain length, you may need to start alternative methods. You may need to braid it up, or (gasp) flat iron once a week (or twice a month). Make sure to dc every wash and to use low manipulation. I found that this is what works for my hair as it will get super tangled in it's natural state, and that will hinder your hair progress. You can look up the Sabino thread for heat protection and keeping hair from reverting. I and some of the other ladies there including lala found like it. There's also a link to free samples. It's www.gotfrizz.com if you want to try it.

Make sure that you take control of your hair. You may want to be the one to style it instead of relying on others to do so for you.

Also, your hair may need lots of moisture if you're natural, make sure you start checking your conditioners and making sure they don't have too much protein in which can make the hair crunchy, brittle, or tangled (at least I've found that for me). Also there's a good alnatural conditioner without protein at www.shescentit.com
called the avocado conditioner, if you're interested. The person who makes it is a lhcf member.

Overall, I can only tell you what works for me. Each person's hair is different, but I hope that I can assist. Hope that helps.

Most of all, nix that lady. If she's damaging your hair you don't want her!!!

 

[vestaluv1]

MISSPRINCESS011

DO NOT EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER ... ... EVER GO BACK TO THIS LADY YO'. . NEVER...U HEARD!
AS STATED, I FEEL THE BEST THING TO DO IS TO RESEARCH AND ALSO USE THIS BOARD TO GATHER TIPS AND ADVICE ON HOW TO CARE FOR AND STYLE YOUR OWN HAIR.
I AM TRANSITIONING AND I UNDERSTAND YOUR FRUSTRATION WITH THE KNOTS AND TANGLES.
I HAVE HAD THE WORST SET OF MATTING, KNOTTING AND TANGLING BUT I FOUND SOMETHING THAT WORKED TODAY!

1. I KNOW ITS VERY TIME CONSUMING, BUT BE VERY GENTLE WHEN DETANGLING YOUR HAIR.
2.AUSSIE MIRACLE HAIR INSURANCE JOJOBA LEAVE IN CONDITIONER LEAVE IN CONDITIONER .
THIS STUFF IS GREAT FOR DETANGLING MY NEW GROWTH AND RELAXED HAIR (ON WET/DAMP HAIR)!
I FINGER COMBED FIRST, THEN USED A WIDE TOOTH COMB.
I'M NOT ALWAYS SO KEEN ON THE DETANGLING I THE SHOWER THING.

IMO, YOU DON'T NEED TO PAY FOR NO HAIR DRESSER TO BE RAKIN' THROUGH YOUR HAIR AND YOU KNOW HOW YOU WANT YOUR HAIR TO BE HANDLED SO TAKE CONTROL OF IT AND BE YOUR OWN HAIR STYLIST.

EM, I CAN'T OFFER ANY OTHER ADVICE BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'VE JUST ABOUT TRIED EVERY OTHER TECHNIQUE/PRODUCTS I CAN THINK OF.

GOOD LUCK!

 

[arizona]

You should never return to this woman.
Period.

I TOTALLY AGREE! I posted my drama. I am also in Texas. Dallas specifically and I know how they do. Not all, but I can win for losing! Don't do it girl!!! I am feeling your frustration. Check out my disaster post at:

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=232161

 

[SparklingFlame]

???...erplexed

H-no you shouldnt go back to her!!!

 

[CurlyMoo]

Thursday i decided i needed to go get a press i tried to stay natural and to stay from heat but the littles tangles and knots where so Frustrating i didnt know what to do my mother and sister are really against me when its for the natural 4a hair....im just sick and tired of everything...
i tried the denman brush, Detangling hair in shower with lots of Conditoner , Steam Treatment , Deep Conditoning with heat, Adding oils in Conditoners , Washing Hair in Sections, Co washing. i dont use Shampoo my hair hates shampoo it makes it so dry So i wash my hair with baking soda just the Scalp than i follow up to a Conditoner wash. I dont know how to braid my hair so i just bun it.When My stylist was washing my hair she was telling the other ladies how i started out with No hair and that i have been getting my hair done by her since i was 6 and how she grew my hair long but i start doing my own hair and it not as long anymore when it really was her FAULT!!!! Last Summer i went swimming and the next day i went for a press she got The Blow dryer and Started raking through my hair with it Sadly the middle part of my hair was not as long any more because of HER!!!! IM SICK AND TIRED OF HER!!!!
IT HURTS BADLY EVERYTIME SHE DOES MY HAIR! SHE DOESNT EVEN USE A HEAT PROTECTANT AND THIS TIME MY hair Grew an Inch Thanks to You Ladies with Advice but She Says i Need a trim?
WHAT PRODUCTS TO USE?
SHOULD I STLL GO TO HER?
HELP ME WITH THE TANGLES AND KNOTS!
Thanks for reading this

Don't go back to the demon stylist! My advice would be for you to throw away your brush or stop using it for 6 months and then see that you have much less breakage. I use some light oil that I smear on the palms of my hands like lotion then press my hands on my hair to smooth it down. Get a mild moisturizing shampoo for dry/damaged hair and preferably one that says ph balanced. But most shampoos for dry damaged hair are ph balanced. Also, get a protein deep conditioner. Where is your hair tangling? Ends or middle. My hair tends to tangle at the ends because this is the most damaged part of my hair. Also I still have some relaxed ends that tangle with the rest and it icky when I wash.

Have you heard of Cathy Howse?
If not go to this website: http://www.ubhpublications.com/

Read the testimonials and question/answer sections. I'm sure someon has your problem. Also, look at her product list.
I hope this helps good luck!

 

[Nubian.Queen]

run baby and don't look back...

 

[Jadore_tay]

aaawww i feel your pain

but please whatever you do, do not go back to that lady, you are paying for your services so there is no reason she should make you feel this uncomfortable. i think you should take the knowledge you learned here and see what products work well with your hair, it is ok if you bun everyday if its not hurting your hair in anyway, you have all the support you need right here on LHCF trust me we are all sick of the bun. stay up!

 

[oooop2]

So sorry she doesn't listen to you. I definitely would not pay her another visit...

And if you aren't comfortable doing your own hair, then I would approach every natural people whose hair you love and ask them who is their stylist...

 

[FAMUDva]

Please don't go back...

 

[memee1978]

Thursday i decided i needed to go get a press i tried to stay natural and to stay from heat but the littles tangles and knots where so Frustrating i didnt know what to do my mother and sister are really against me when its for the natural 4a hair....im just sick and tired of everything...
i tried the denman brush, Detangling hair in shower with lots of Conditoner , Steam Treatment , Deep Conditoning with heat, Adding oils in Conditoners , Washing Hair in Sections, Co washing. i dont use Shampoo my hair hates shampoo it makes it so dry So i wash my hair with baking soda just the Scalp than i follow up to a Conditoner wash. I dont know how to braid my hair so i just bun it.When My stylist was washing my hair she was telling the other ladies how i started out with No hair and that i have been getting my hair done by her since i was 6 and how she grew my hair long but i start doing my own hair and it not as long anymore when it really was her FAULT!!!! Last Summer i went swimming and the next day i went for a press she got The Blow dryer and Started raking through my hair with it Sadly the middle part of my hair was not as long any more because of HER!!!! IM SICK AND TIRED OF HER!!!!
IT HURTS BADLY EVERYTIME SHE DOES MY HAIR! SHE DOESNT EVEN USE A HEAT PROTECTANT AND THIS TIME MY hair Grew an Inch Thanks to You Ladies with Advice but She Says i Need a trim?
WHAT PRODUCTS TO USE?
SHOULD I STLL GO TO HER?
HELP ME WITH THE TANGLES AND KNOTS!
Thanks for reading this

i havnt went to a stylest since 2003...when i had my hair cut collor bone length.....i stayed away....look at my hair now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!stylist style good...apluse....hair care.........f.............................stay away!!!!!!!!!!!!try to do your own hair...................if you find a good stylist thats different!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!but if not........stay away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!only my openion.

 

[memee1978]

MISSPRINCESS011

DO NOT EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER ... ... EVER GO BACK TO THIS LADY YO'. . NEVER...U HEARD!
AS STATED, I FEEL THE BEST THING TO DO IS TO RESEARCH AND ALSO USE THIS BOARD TO GATHER TIPS AND ADVICE ON HOW TO CARE FOR AND STYLE YOUR OWN HAIR.
I AM TRANSITIONING AND I UNDERSTAND YOUR FRUSTRATION WITH THE KNOTS AND TANGLES.
I HAVE HAD THE WORST SET OF MATTING, KNOTTING AND TANGLING BUT I FOUND SOMETHING THAT WORKED TODAY!

1. I KNOW ITS VERY TIME CONSUMING, BUT BE VERY GENTLE WHEN DETANGLING YOUR HAIR.
2.AUSSIE MIRACLE HAIR INSURANCE JOJOBA LEAVE IN CONDITIONER LEAVE IN CONDITIONER .
THIS STUFF IS GREAT FOR DETANGLING MY NEW GROWTH AND RELAXED HAIR (ON WET/DAMP HAIR)!
I FINGER COMBED FIRST, THEN USED A WIDE TOOTH COMB.
I'M NOT ALWAYS SO KEEN ON THE DETANGLING I THE SHOWER THING.

IMO, YOU DON'T NEED TO PAY FOR NO HAIR DRESSER TO BE RAKIN' THROUGH YOUR HAIR AND YOU KNOW HOW YOU WANT YOUR HAIR TO BE HANDLED SO TAKE CONTROL OF IT AND BE YOUR OWN HAIR STYLIST.

EM, I CAN'T OFFER ANY OTHER ADVICE BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'VE JUST ABOUT TRIED EVERY OTHER TECHNIQUE/PRODUCTS I CAN THINK OF.

GOOD LUCK!

i agree 100 percent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[michaela]

Thank You Ladies Im ready To do all My research Now!
I will Checking in To all the Products you all mentioned!
Yeah She really Hurted My feelins i was Crying as she was Detangling my hair ROUGHLY i still have a horrible Head ache From it!!!!!
The Products i was Using was Care Free Curl Gold instant Activator
olive oil Africans Best Ultimate Herbal Oil v05 Strawberyy & Cream Champange Kiss and Passion Fruit Smoothie it says they contain Soy milk protein? and TrEsemme Smooth and Silky it Contains Hydrolyzed wheat protein...And this i was using Megatek Which has Protein in it...

 

[michaela]

I found another Stylist!
She does my Best friends Mothers hair
I went to hair Before and she did a great job!
This time at this salon they use HEAT PROTECTANTS!
MY friend told my I should NEVER EVER Go back To my original Stylist
I dont plan on it! I just will Take my good time to detangle my hair like i was doing!
Anymore recommend products???

 

[michaela]

bumpin for more replys

 

[Ms Lala]

THese are great tips. My hair is stuck at BSL because of I keep having to cut out tangles and knots from my hair. I am going to try the detangler you suggested and stick w/stretched styles. I have been trying to do the wet buns and wash n goes and it ain't workin'

I'm natural by the way.
My advice is as follows:
With the denman...I never use it to detangle. I use a comb to detangle, then the denman to smooth. Also for the tangles and knots, if you are not opposed to shampoo, find the original creme of nature in the white and green bottle. They just discontinued it but it's at Sally's (I scooped up the last few bottles after I got a heads up on this site). Also a good detangler that has helped me when my hair was super tangled is this: I found this at Walgreens in the kids hair section and there is nothing that compares to it detangling (that I've found))...Nothing. It's by Dark and Lovely it's called Beautiful Begginnings Kids Ouchless Detangler. On the container which has a purple top and is silver with purple and pink writing it says (Dramatically reduces knots, breakage, and tuggling for relaxed and natural hair). I does what it says. It's cheap, and it works better than just detangling with conditioner. Spray it on the knots, wait a minute or two, before detangling. It even works better than oils or conditioners for detangling. My goal is to have as little hair on the ground as possible, and keep most of it in my hair!

Last thing, if your hair gets too tangled, and you're putting it in a bun, and it's past a certain length, you may need to start alternative methods. You may need to braid it up, or (gasp) flat iron once a week (or twice a month). Make sure to dc every wash and to use low manipulation. I found that this is what works for my hair as it will get super tangled in it's natural state, and that will hinder your hair progress. You can look up the Sabino thread for heat protection and keeping hair from reverting. I and some of the other ladies there including lala found like it. There's also a link to free samples. It's www.gotfrizz.com if you want to try it.

Make sure that you take control of your hair. You may want to be the one to style it instead of relying on others to do so for you.

Also, your hair may need lots of moisture if you're natural, make sure you start checking your conditioners and making sure they don't have too much protein in which can make the hair crunchy, brittle, or tangled (at least I've found that for me). Also there's a good alnatural conditioner without protein at www.shescentit.com
called the avocado conditioner, if you're interested. The person who makes it is a lhcf member.

Overall, I can only tell you what works for me. Each person's hair is different, but I hope that I can assist. Hope that helps.

Most of all, nix that lady. If she's damaging your hair you don't want her!!!

 

[Angkin73]

I found another Stylist!
She does my Best friends Mothers hair
I went to hair Before and she did a great job!
This time at this salon they use HEAT PROTECTANTS!
MY friend told my I should NEVER EVER Go back To my original Stylist
I dont plan on it! I just will Take my good time to detangle my hair like i was doing!
Anymore recommend products???

I'm glad you found a new stylist. I am a newbie on here and I like to try to use all natural hair products. I find that I can't always do that. If you have a Sally's where your at, I like to use Ion leave in conditioner. Ion also has a leave in conditioner for swimmers. It detangles and removes all the chlorine and and other chemicals that are in the pool from your hair. I still like to use it even if I don't go to the pool because it work so well.