Thank you ladies I appreciate all of your honest responses. Now it’s my turn.
I was in a relationship with someone who was saved too for about four years,
we were quite aware of the sin factor, but we fell anyway again & again
& again & again & again (you get the picture). It got really bad. Like Adam
and Eve did when they sinned we tried to hide from God. Sometimes we'd go
to church togther and be at the alter crying and repenting, but fall right back
into it. It really became a viciuos cycle. When we allowed that lust demon to
come in it really took control of and became the focus of our relationship. We
would fight and argue like crazy and we couldn't explain to people that we
were fighting because of spiritual warfare (they wouldn't understand). We
both received words that in a season we are supposed to be married, but
because of lust we continued to push back our own destinies. For a while we
both had the mindset that God if you said we are supposed to be married
anyway what difference does it make if we do it now or later? Both of us
would knowingly walk right into sin, we'd sleep in the same bed or get
undressed in front of each other. Needless to say both of us have been
humbled and chastised a great deal for our short comings. God has separated
us from each other for this season (he lives in NYC and I am in Chicago) I
completely understand His purpose for doing this. We finally got tired of going
in circles and realized that we need to indvidually put our focus on Him and
not each other. The temptation to fornicate is really only an issue when I am
home in NYC with him ummmm but masterbation is an issue while I'm here in
Chicago
. Sometimes I feel like I have the sex drive of a man, I mean I
want it all the time! I've had sisters in Christ who acted as my accountability
partners, but I didn't feel like they could relate because they were virgins.
Another one had been raped in the past so sex was the last thing on her
mind. I just need all the Jesus I can get ya'll if I am going to make it until I
get married.