jdvzmommy
Well-Known Member
yeah, so that goes right back around to my forever alone comment.
*yeshrug*
I don't see how it does, but again
yeah, so that goes right back around to my forever alone comment.
*yeshrug*
Genital warts come to mind @meesch - regarding hand jobs and STD's.
I don't think I'd necessarily disqualify the guy for that if it were a one time thing.
My ears would perk up if he was getting private shows from strippers though - and getting extra benefits.
Same differencei didnt say anything about soliciting the services of prostitutes. im talking about happy ending massages which are not a separate cost/prostitution. that's why they're called a happy ending. get thee strawman to a corner.
The really stupid thing about this is that you worried about whether a chick is a prostitute or not instead of the motivations and actions of the man in question I sweaaaaaaaaaaar chicks got the game so backwards.
So let me get this straight. You care about why a chick is tricking rather than why a dude is using her services?
What on earth difference does that make?
Same difference
What does this mean?
So first you say that it's acceptable and making it seem like most guys do it, now you're saying that it's questionable and guys shouldn't be using prostitutes?
Which is it?
Girl, I'm not understanding your reasoning.
Why do you have such low opinions of men?
SweetNic_JA said:Genital warts come to mind meesch - regarding hand jobs and STD's.
I don't think I'd necessarily disqualify the guy for that if it were a one time thing.
My ears would perk up if he was getting private shows from strippers though - and getting extra benefits.
So people got genital warts on they hands now huh? Or the same strain of HPV that causes warts on the body is transferable sexually huh?
Jesus be a 7th grade sex ed class!!!!!
Here, I googled for you.
http://teentalk.ca/can-you-get-genital-warts-from-masturbating-or-giving-a-hand-job
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/STDs/HPV-and-Fingering/show/248051
http://kidshealth.org/teen/infections/stds/std_warts.html
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/000886.htm
The same is true for herpes, before you try that argument next.
The warts can be transferred to any part of the body through physical contact. It can manifest on the palms. So yes. If you hard responded with a little more tact, I probably would have gone online and done some research for you...but in short you are wrong.
Honey, do you know what it means that HPV comes in different strains? No, I am not wrong. But it's funny to me that you are arguing, with great conviction, something that is common knowledge
@meesch I'm not your honey and I was not arguing. Besides, it's not my man (or potential) man who has gotten hand jobs. I simply introduced a point into the discussion,to which you reacted by jumping off your leash.
But besides that, I agree that it's totally splitting hairs to distinguish happy endings completely from prostitution. If you're performing a sex act solely for pay (doesn't matter what act), guess what? You're a prostitute.
What bothers me even more than the ick factor is the idea that this woman may or may not have been in the trade by her own will. Sure, plenty of sex workers get into that line voluntarily, but plenty of them are trafficked or otherwise coerced as well. To think that someone I was trying to be with might have carelessly aided this process because, "Why not?" is really off-putting to me
And I simply laughed at and corrected your incorrect info.
Why you mad? Let's move on ------>
The above article doesn't explicitly mention hand jobs, but I don't think there' s a need to .Genital Warts (HPV)
You don't have to have sex to get an STD. Skin-to-skin contact is enough to spread HPV, the virus family that causes genital warts. Some types cause warts and are usually harmless, but others may lead to cervical or anal cancer. Vaccines can protect against some of the most dangerous types.
Signs: Pink or flesh-colored warts that are raised, flat, or shaped like cauliflower. Often there are no symptoms.
SRC: http://www.webmd.com/sexual-conditions/ss/slideshow-std-pictures-and-facts
Genital warts are the most prevalent sexually transmitted disease (STD) in North The usa and Europe. Most clients with genital warts are involving the decades of 17-33 several years and is the most typical motive for another person attending a sexual health clinic. While they appearance very similar, HPV is not the virus that causes warts on your palms and palms. Genital warts are a ton extra contagious and will need to be taken care of as shortly as attainable. In The us, its approximated up to 17 million sexually active People in the usa have HPV, which is boosting by 7% just about every year, but there are estimates that exhibit there are as lots of as 5 million new instances really transmitted every single year! http://www.hpvtreatment.us/tag/hpv-warts/
melophone13 I didn't see your post. I think the stripper thing would bother me because I have heard so many stories about strippers offering intercourse as an additional service in private rooms. If he told me had had sexual intercourse with a stripper and/or regular street prostitute, it definitely would be a no-go.That's interesting. Why would strippers bother you more than happy endings and/or other types of prostitution?
Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
For real.
So y'all dumping dudes for getting hand jobs before he met you?
And wondering why chicks stay single...
IS lying better?
This cannot be what's hot in the streets.
Massage parlors are notorious for hoe-tivity, hence the reason 99% of folks in this thread understood some form of what a happy ending was. Dudes who go to massage parlors don't accidently end up trickin. More times than not, they researched ahead of time to know where to go so they aren't wasting their time just getting a 'massage'.
That situation is not only not in the same lane as 'dumping dudes for getting hand jobs before meeting you', that ish is a completely different freeway.
i didnt say anything about soliciting the services of prostitutes. im talking about happy ending massages which are not a separate cost/prostitution. that's why they're called a happy ending. get thee strawman to a corner./QUOTE]
Seriously.
Uh I guess Happy Endings changed or its a regional thang. Cuz the Asian Massage joint that I know of gives Happy Endings to Men and Women. ORALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL M2M,M2W&W2W.
Google is your friend.
You should really look up strawman and understand what a strawman argument means, because your interpretation of my post that you quoted is another one.
"Men incorporate sex more frequently than women do" is not equal to "most guys use prostitutes."
"Men incorporate sex more frequently than women do" is not equal to "soliciting the services of prostitutes is okay/acceptable."
If you're going to argue against what I say, do not extrapolate statements to encompass claims that I have not made.
Here is my point of view drawn in crayon to hopefully avoid misinterpretation:
Repeat: most men incorporate sex into things more frequently than women do. This means most guys do not view things like lap dances - hand jobs - fondling and petting - and various other non-penetrative acts as "having sex." This is because services like masturbation and even oral sex have no risk of pregnancy and very low risk of STD transmission, if any at all. Note that this comment is entirely irrelevant to homosexual activities before that pops up out of nowhere.
In my opinion, "happy endings" are not soliciting the services of a prostitute, because they are accompanied by the legitimate service of a massage; and this is not something that is just done at commercial sex houses either. They are considered part of the massage.
Point two:
While I am not bothered by happy ending massages, lap dances from strippers, even blow jobs by strippers, it is a red flag for men who would frequently use these services.
The occasional happy ending - whatever. One time wtf with a stripper - I will let it slide.
Daily, weekly, regular happy endings, routine visits to strippers, repeated sexual excursions with strippers - suspect.
Distinctions matter before you go jumping and assuming what people are trying to say. Further, don't tell me what my opinions of men are and are not. That is deliberately inflammatory and putting words in my mouth. I didn't say that, so stop trying to start a wack argument with me over something YOU made up.
WOOOAHHHHHHH
What is all the rudeness about??
If those are your views, then it is what it is, but don't get on me because I'm trying to understand what you're saying
Have you spoken to many men and asked them this?
If it's not sex then what is it?
My point was that those things are the same (IMO) because he is seeing his sexual experience as something this not meaningful or just a release. It doesn't matter if it happens just once or many time
I'm saying you sound like you have low opinions of men because you are generalizing so plainly
What is all this bitterness about? You sound like a hurt person. I don't understand why you're so defensive and creating an argument out of nothing. I have been nothing but polite and I expect the same
please. i am never bitter toward men. i am one of the few women on this board that i would say LOVES men without all the hang ups. and i for damn sure have not been treated or dogged out by men in the way the women on this forum talk about men. there is nothing for me to be bitter about, sweetie. do me a favor and don't reply to me again because i cant with the reading comprehension skills. rather, reply if you wont to, but i wont be responding.
speaking generally about the topic at hand... i think, in a lot of ways, this sort of thing is kind of sad because to me it is symptomatic of a larger problem.
i think that black women as a group have really messed up attitudes about men. which makes sense, because black men as a group have messed up attitudes about women. but black women refuse to acknowledge fundamental and normative truths about men, and project this narrow mindedness in a really judgmental way. this, of course, makes men reactive and black women end up inviting the exact same type of men in their life that they think they are taking strides to avoid.
we have this whole thing with fear of dl men, which is obviously valid given the state of our community. but most bw refuse to acknowledge something like, for example, many, many men having had what would be termed "homosexual" experiences with other boys in childhood. as part of experimenting, playing "doctor" (for want of a better phrase) with other boys is reaaaaaaaaaally common in adolescent males. i'm not talking about anal sex. but still boy on boy experimentation that most black women would side eye to think their man has done. and it doesn't make a dude gay, or men that he has inclinations toward men as an adult, but most bw would not hear of it. and then, they get into denial, or accusatory...
i think it's foolish to be in denial about the fact that most men (i would even go so far to say black men in particular) would do something like get a blowjob from a stripper as part of a private dance... or, go to a spa (NOT A COMMERCIAL SEX PARLOR) and allow the masseuse to bring him to orgasm at the end. but you tell this to a bw and she starts extrapolating this behavior into areas where it doesn't make sense and ultimately won't be helpful to her in determining acceptable attitudes and subsequent behaviors in a mate.
sprinkle into this all the ridiculous fears and ignorance and inaccurate information bw have about stds. i really cannot believe there was more than one person in this thread saying that you can get an std from someone's hand bw act like they are afraid for a dude to poke his index finger into her arm for fear of an std, with the great irony being... bw have very proportionally high rates of stds compared to other races of women AND the irony that being open and realistic about the potential for stds and how they are transmitted is the biggest way to prevent std transmission! also known as being able to TALK to your partner about their sex history. but as this post shows, a man tries to do that and the woman starts reeling (and, imo, drawing inaccurate conclusions). bw would rather pretend it's not something THEY have to worry about, after all, they screen men with some ridiculous arbitrary system, so they just know they are doing the most to protect their health NOOOOOOOOOOOO.
so basically my issue with this thread is that it is a huge personification of the exact behaviors and attitudes in bw that i think are really the root of their relationship issues. wrongheaded attitudes and leaping to perverse conclusions without being mature enough to pursue situations in a realistic and open minded manner... now i am far from saying women should accept nasty pervert behavior... and while i say that "men would get bjs from strippers" my bf wouldnt even like going to a strip club (i have been trying to get him to go to one with me, quite frankly) let along get a jobby so obviously my standards about sexual behavior and expectations in my own relationships may or may not be conservative, even...
but i often see something that looks like to me distorted thinking that is missing the mark on how to judge potential partners and like... idk, it just looks like something that is so obvious to me, i have a hard time seeing other women "not get it"...
Don't go asking questions if you can't handle the truth!!!