Please help!! Would it be unrealistic for me to go natural?

[achangedlife]

My hair is 4b and relaxed, I have had so many setbacks and I'm not retaining any length. A major part of that is because I don't like damaged hair so I feel like I can't repair it then I trim it. Any way I'm thinking about transitioning. The problem is that I want to continue wearing my hair straight while I transition. I only have about 4-6 of hair though. If I could manage to keep my hair this same length but trim the relaxed hair as it grows then I don't think it'll be long before I'm fully natural. But once I'm natural would I still be able to wear it straight if it's so short? Is that even realistic or will I have to rock a TWA? I don't think I'm mentally prepared for that yet. Nor do I really want to do braids or weaves or anything like that. I don't think I can do it but if someone's been through this please help. My last relaxer I did with Nairobi for the first time and it seems to be holding up well, the only issues I'm having right now is with the hair that was relaxed before the Nairobi, so maybe I should just stick with Nairobi and slowly trim off the other relaxers. That just might be my best bet so I won't have to use so much heat to get the look I want. IDK, please help.

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[amwcah]

You have to think about how you would manage to keep your natural hair straight. Will a blowdry straight satisfy you, or will you have to flat iron or comb straighten to get your desired look? Given the method, you have to consider the long-term impact it will have on the healthy of your hair.

 

[achangedlife]

Actually I love rollersets. Right now I mainly rollerset using perm rods. If I can continue to do that with natural hair and still have it look smooth, full, and healthy I think I would be happy with that.

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[Your Cheeziness]

I don't think it'll be realistic to expect a rollerset results to come out exactly the same on natural 4b hair as it does on relaxed hair, especially short hair. You might be better off using straw sets or whatnot. But, it doesn't sound like you're not mentally ready to be natural yet.

You can transition long term without extentions, but you'll have to treat your hair like lace. If it is already damaged, I don't think straightening it on a regular basis would be wise while transitioning. There is a super long, very informative thread on here called Long Term Transitioning Thread. It's packed with advice and styling information on dealing with two textures and maintaining your hair.

 

[lesedi]

I say go for it. It will be an adjustment but I think that once you are 100% natural you may grow to embrace your curly hair too so striaght styles won't be the only option.My hair is growing out of a TWA and I'm so sad Like you, I also wasn't keen on rocking it initially but it became my signature look and I actually felt the most sexy and confident with it
Some hair doesn't work with a perm. Mine definitely didn't. As for the length, i'm sure that you could style your short hair in a straight style- maybe get a rihanna cut or halle style on flatironed or hard pressed hair??
Good luck sis

 

[kittenz]

Since you prefer straight hair maybe you could continue the relaxer you're using now like you said or maybe consider texlaxing so you can still straighten easily without processing your hair so long. GL!

 

[DearJohn]

If you are willing to wear curly hair you can hold to it and curl with rod sets or do braid outs to transition otherwise get you a good wig and rock it until you like the length. I am now wearing my hair out regularly since my big chop.

 

[discodumpling]

I think you should keep your relaxer. You are not mentally prepared to handle a head full of nappy hair. 6 inches of relaxed hair is quite different than 6" of natural kinky hair....and when SHRINKAGE kicks in...WHOA! HHG!

 

[30something]

I'm a Type 4b, I transition using heat and I wear my natural hair straight at most half of the time. I transitioned for 6 months my last relaxer was 9 months prior to my Big Chop. I'm a slow grower so I had ~4 inches of hair and I started straightening quite early... So yes it is realistic. Honestly It was annoying sometimes to style really short straight hair..so like someone suggest it probably would be best to cut into a style or at least wait until your natural hair is NL or SHL.

Before I BC'ed I preferred straight hair too but you might just find that natural hair style fit great on you too... that is what usually happens. Why not go for it.. can always turn back.

 

[Janet']

I think that if Nairobi is working for you then you should stick with it...Going natural as you said is just as mental as it is physical, so if you are not mentally prepared, it can make things a little difficult...I was a long-term transitioner (2 plus years). The first year, I utilized braidouts, rollersets, and buns...The second year, I found the Dominican Salon and wore my hair straight until I was fully natural. I will say that the Domicans got my hair straight for sure, but it was not as healthy as it could have been. The heat from the blow-dryer left my crown broken off...

 

[Cheekychica]

I think she should stick to the relaxer. She obviously likes straight hair and so to wake up with with tight, kinky, 4b hair may be too overwhelming. Your hair likes the Nairobi relaxer you and you like straight hair- I'd stick to that.

 

[carameldimples]

I agree with everyone else, stick to relaxing if you want straight hair. You can go natural later when you are ready to deal with the kinks and coils.

 

[Nonie]

Since you prefer straight hair maybe you could continue the relaxer you're using now like you said or maybe consider texlaxing so you can still straighten easily without processing your hair so long. GL!

I think you should keep your relaxer. You are not mentally prepared to handle a head full of nappy hair. 6 inches of relaxed hair is quite different than 6" of natural kinky hair....and when SHRINKAGE kicks in...WHOA! HHG!

I think she should stick to the relaxer. She obviously likes straight hair and so to wake up with with tight, kinky, 4b hair may be too overwhelming. Your hair likes the Nairobi relaxer you and you like straight hair- I'd stick to that.

I agree with everyone else, stick to relaxing if you want straight hair. You can go natural later when you are ready to deal with the kinks and coils.

I couldn't agree more with these ladies. Just transition to healthier relaxed hair by slowly trimming off the damaged hair and continue to use Nairobi as your relaxer, using all the good tips that the forum has to offer for caring for relaxed hair. You will get a lot of support and guidance on how to maintain the straight hair.

Since your frustration is just lack of retention, not that you hate relaxing, there's no need to give it up only to go for another "evil" that could fry your hair in a jiffy if you made the wrong move. Better to just tweak what you're doing now and stick to the devil you know.

 

[missjanelleb]

I say weave it up for a few months, bc, if you don't like it, weave it up again to get more length and eventually start to deal with your own hair. I didn't think I could let go of straight hair, so I dealt with 2 textures for 6 months, started wearing weaves, first it was a loose curl, then I bc'd at the year mark of my last relaxer and continued to weave until this past july. I was in a weave for almost 2 years. Now I wear 2 strand twists on my natural hair and love it

 

[formysanity]

I totally get where you're coming from. I started off with really damaged hair and loathed the idea of a weave. I found it expensive to install and it would last for 6 weeks at most. Most hair that didn't tangle was really expensive and i refused to spend the money. I didn't like extension braids because it took too long to install (can you tell I hate sitting in salons?) and I couldn't be bothered to wash and condition my hair whilst in braids.

In the end I settled for wearing a wig. Like you, I couldn't bring myself to do the big chop so I cornrowed my hair under wigs for nearly a year and slowly cut off the relaxed ends. I'm a slow grower too so in that year, I only achieved 4-5 inches of growth but it allowed me to grow strong healthy hair and not be frustrated with thinking about my hair and it's lack of growth.

Anyway, in short, I'm suggesting you wear a wig, keep your hair and cut off the damage as your hair grows.

HHJ

 

[sworsham]

I chopped my hair short (I did not transition). I did this in early October. I decided that I wanted to wear it straight for the fall and winter and curly for the spring and summer when it is a bit longer. I deep conditioner with a moisterizing conditioner overnight and I rinse, blowdry,and flat iron. I have 4b hair too. I make sure that I use a heat protectant and I have not had any shedding. I only flat iron on wash day and to keep the style, I pin curl it at night. Here are some pictures. This is my first time posting pics and so I hope they are not too big.

 

[sworsham]

Okay so I did it wrong the first time. Let's see if I can add the picture now.

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

I do think it would be urealistic, you seem to prefer wearing your hair straight and maintaining the striaght hair curled look most of the time, so I'd say transition to healthier relaxed hair. You can go natural when you're ready to wear more styles involving your natural texture

This is ironic considering that when I transitioned I did it with nothing but presses, I intended to keep going like that indefinitely (since I didn't know how to do anything else) but then I started to explore all my styling options and finally made the mental transition.

 

[Cheekychica]

^^^ Nice hair. You're relaxed though right?

Eta: My comment was for Sworsham

 

[sworsham]

Thanks Cheekychica!

I am not relaxed. All the permed hair was just cut out when I took that pic. I am a 4b but I flat iron (I do not use a pressing comb). I just make sure that my hair is well moisterized before heat day (through use of deep moisterizing conditioners).

 

[yorkpatties]

Nor do I really want to do braids or weaves or anything like that.

Straight wigs will give you the straight look and protect your real hair. I believe that's your best option for the results you're trying to achieve. I know for myself, it's a choice; do I want it bone straight or do I want it healthy? Because I can't have both together.

 

[achangedlife]

Thank you ladies for all your input. I guess I'm just frustrated right now. I'm only 7 weeks post touch up and since I'm not having major breakage/ shedding I don't have to make a decision right now. I guess I'll just sleep on it for now.

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[achangedlife]

Sworsham, that's you're natural hair flat ironed after a chop? It looks good.

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[sworsham]

achangedlife- Thanks and yes it is a natural, unrelaxed
4b. I followed a regimen that I found on this site on straightening without heat damage and without the need for a pressing comb. I was shocked that my thick hair could get straight on low heat settings. I think it really is the conditioner.

 

[naturalmanenyc]

I transitioned for 2 years and made the mistake of trying to keep my hair straight for far too long. There are lots of straight hair naturals but all of them that I've seen have heat damage when they try to wear their curly hair.

If you are not mentally prepared for 4b hair, then you should probably start with a goal of healthier relaxed hair.

My hair is 4b and relaxed, I have had so many setbacks and I'm not retaining any length. A major part of that is because I don't like damaged hair so I feel like I can't repair it then I trim it. Any way I'm thinking about transitioning. The problem is that I want to continue wearing my hair straight while I transition. I only have about 4-6 of hair though. If I could manage to keep my hair this same length but trim the relaxed hair as it grows then I don't think it'll be long before I'm fully natural. But once I'm natural would I still be able to wear it straight if it's so short? Is that even realistic or will I have to rock a TWA? I don't think I'm mentally prepared for that yet. Nor do I really want to do braids or weaves or anything like that. I don't think I can do it but if someone's been through this please help. My last relaxer I did with Nairobi for the first time and it seems to be holding up well, the only issues I'm having right now is with the hair that was relaxed before the Nairobi, so maybe I should just stick with Nairobi and slowly trim off the other relaxers. That just might be my best bet so I won't have to use so much heat to get the look I want. IDK, please help.

Sent from my LS670 using LS670

 

[brittle_hair]

I was under the impression that I could go natural and use heat to achieve a similar look to relaxed hair, but now that I am natural I have realised that it takes far too much heat to get it straight and the results don't last me more than a few hours - clearly doing something wrong. So i'm back in braids and will wear my natural hair when I have a bit more length and a lot less shrinkage - hopefully next spring/summer..

 

[zoromo]

If you do not like the damaged feeling, stick to what you know. I have been natural on and off for more than 10 years and my hair still feels so brittle after a day or two in any one style, other than twists or braids. I often feel like cutting an inch/the ends off all the time. I have tried everything under the sun, short of just hiding my hair so I wont feel it that dry feeling. Take the advice of the ladies here and try to work with what you have become used to until you are really ready to take the step.

 

[Nonie]

I was under the impression that I could go natural and use heat to achieve a similar look to relaxed hair, but now that I am natural I have realised that it takes far too much heat to get it straight and the results don't last me more than a few hours - clearly doing something wrong. So i'm back in braids and will wear my natural hair when I have a bit more length and a lot less shrinkage - hopefully next spring/summer..

brittle_hair, if you have kinky hair, and if you have fine strands, I don't think you'll ever have "a lot less shrinkage"

This was my shrinkage when I had shoulder length hair:

This is my shrinkage when I have APL hair:

My idol Sera has WL-HBL natural 4B hair but her hair shrinks to shoulder. So yeah, some people don't get major hang as their hair grows if it isn't heavy enough for that to make a difference.

The only way for those of us with fine kinky hair to avoid having shrinkage is if we stretch it in some style and then not allow it to get wet. So braid-outs, twist-outs, banding, blowdry or flat iron may be the methods to the madness for you. Just wanted to mention this so you can be prepared and not disappointed. Look for people with your hair type and notice that they get hang-time when they wear stretched styles to prepare their hair.

 

[achangedlife]

Well I think I'm OK with my hair for now, and guess what I did. I was going to tj maxx and there was a supercut next door so on impulse I went and got a hair cut. For a second I thought of jumping out of the chair but I didn't. It looks a little boyish but I'm OK with it, it's still long enough to be grasped by a small flat iron. I also invested in the croc flat iron. I only plan on using it 2x a week, no more than 3. So far I love it. It got real close to my roots and straightened my new growths with ease. From the reviews I've read maintains even in some humidity, we'll see. Most days I just plan to brush it back and use some pretty hair clips to make it look feminine. I haven't decided what I'm going to do yet regarding a relaxer but I'm hoping I can at least stretch my relaxer another 7 weeks.

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[Lila25]

OP,

I'm not sure if your ready to be natural yet?? Maybe you should go to the transitioners thread, if no one has previously mentioned that. I transitioned for twelve months before chopping off my relaxed ends and I did feel awkward at first with 6 inches of hair, but during my transition I really started to love and appreciate my 4b/c texture. I love the versatility.

Although natural hair is stronger than relaxed hair, you do have to accept that your hair is not going to be as straight as it used to be especially if you are a 4b/c. It becomes detrimental to the hair to continuously add heat, flat irons, blow dryers and curling irons to achieve the straighter styles you wear with relaxed hair. Using heat once in awhile is ok, but I don't bother in the spring or summer due to humidity..my hair will revert before I leave the house!

No point in putting all that heat on my hair when the style won't last.. Check out the transitioners thread and do some YouTube searches for transitioning with your particular hair type.