People's Court/Relaxer

[Crystalicequeen123]

I was 10 years old when I got my first relaxer. And my younger sister was only 8! *gasp* You know, whatever one sister got the other had to get also.

But anyway...now that I think about it, I SOOOO wish I could have gotten a relaxer when I was much older... I wish I had waited to get a relaxer until I was about 14 years old. I think that age is okay.

I remember it clearly. My sister and I used to get our hair done at some friend of ours in the neighborhood who did hair. I didn't even desire a relaxer. I probably didn't even know what a relaxer was. I just thought that some black people had curly/kinky hair (like mine) and that some had straight hair naturally.

Then one day, I was getting my hair done for a special occasion by the neighborhood stylist lady friend, and she kept tugging on my hair and kept talkign about how "thick" it was, and how it was too "hard" to put a comb through , and she made me feel really bad about my hair. Well...you know what she did?? She went and put a relaxer in my hair AGAINST my mother's wishes, and put it in my sister's hair too!

Needless to say...my mom was shocked and a bit upset when we came home. She didn't mind it, but she just wished the lady-friend had told her first.

So, ever since then I've had a relaxer.

My only advice to those young girls who cry about thier curly/kinky hair.... WAIT!! PLEASE WAIT a while before getting your first virgin relaxer. It's worth it. At least wait until you're able to do your OWN hair by yourself.

I knew this lady in our congregation who had her daughter's hair permed at age 4!!! Then she had the nerve to put a "curly perm" in her hair. Is it any wonder now her hair is breaking off like crazy at the age of 16??

 

[Poohbear]

That lil girl's mama was crazy for letting her child go thru that!

Anyway, I was around the age of 8 or 9 when I get my first perm.

 

[kristina]

I got my hair first relaxed at 6. my mom never pressed it, I discovered what a pressing comb was when I was in college growing out the relaxer. my mom told me she relaxed my hair because my hair was really thick and unmanageable- she had a relaxer as well. Now when she sees my hair wet, she says my hair must have changed textures because it was coarser then- but then when it dries w/o products she's like- oh yeah, I remember that.
I actually took the relaxer with no problems- my real problems started when I got it done in high school at a salon (a lady used to come to my house to do my hair but I thought her stylin was old fashioned). My hair was really overprocessed and combined with my heat abuse, I got tons of breakage.
Anywho, no way would I relax my kids hair- I would let them make that choice on their own.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

I would not use chemicals on my children's hair, and I wouldn't resort to frequent pressing either. I can always get a bigger comb, have more patience, take more time, and use different products.

AMEN!

Yeah, I won't be using chemicals in my daughters hair (when/if I have children) until a certain age, IF (and only IF) she wants it desperately. I will NOT make my child feel bad for the hair that she was blessed with. NO WAY.

 

[victorious]

I had my first relaxer when I was eleven for my sixth grade graduation.

 

[nurseN98]

The way she was speaking seemed otherwise. She spoke as if she's never heard of it and just bashed her (you all saw it). I think it was excessive, whether or not she knew. If she did, she would know that this practice is COMMON, whether or not it be a good one.

I saw that episode, I didn't get the impression that she bashed her solely because she was getting a relaxer. The main thing that pissed her off was when she was still sitting in her chair when the little girl was saying she was burning. That's when she got heated. That lady should've gotten up to see what was going on at least, she just sat in her chair and let the process continue. She knows the risks of relaxing, she should've paid more attention. I would have bashed her goofy behind too...

And I got my first relaxer when I was 16...

 

[lsubabiedee]

I was either 13 or 14

 

[Enchantmt]

I got a jeri curl in 6th grade so I was 11 or 12. I wore it 6th ,7th and 8th grade. By then I couldnt take it anymore. My sister had left a relaxer laying around so I used it. I was a hair mag addict even then and had read that curl's only break the hairbonds part of the way and relaxers break them all the way. Still, it was probably by the grace of God my hair didnt fall out. I had one natural stint after that when I was 18 or 19/maybe early 20s, I dont remember. Then I relaxed and had been relaxed up until this year. Now I'm FREEEEEEEEEEE!!

 

[Victorian]

I don't remember my first relaxer at all. But I know my hair was natural in my preschool pic and it looks relaxed in my kindergarten pic. So I must have been 4 or 5. I do know that I never got my relaxer done at a salon; my mom always did it and she knew what she was doing so I guess I just got lucky.

That's sad about the mother letting her child's head get burned though

 

[Spidergul]

I got my first relaxer at 17. Before that my mom pressed and curled it. I do not plan to relaxer my daughters hair, shes 9, until she is that old or even older. I would love for her to have long natural hair. I have this terrible fear that one of my sister-in-laws will relaxer her hair without my permission. She has very thick hair and it can be a pain to comb at times. I normally plait it up (I can not braid or cornrow) after a wash with lots of shea butter and sulphur 8. It is a very good length I think considering I do not spend a lot of time doing it. But my sister-in-law always makes these comments about perming her daughters hair when she was very young and why don't I do the same. Sometimes my daughter hair does look a little fuzzy. But I refuse to relax. I self-relax my own hair-but am seriously considering going natural-as soon as I get the nerve to do a big ol chop. (Cut and paste my Foki to see daughters hair after one of her aunts pressed it.)

 

[Angelicus]

I wanted to share something else with you all. As I stated on page 1, I got my first relaxer around six or seven. A year or two later, my mom was still doing my hair with those at-home, no-lye kits. She'd run it through all my hair smoothing it with her hands. I'd burn and go crazy (Why would you put a child through this?). Then she would rinse my hair out in the tub. I'd get woozy from the bad smell of it.


Then she had a crazy idea to "neutralize" my hair by pouring pure vinegar, straight from the bottle, on my hair. I will never forget how much it burned. Then after my hair was dry she would put nasty smelling Camphor Phenique on all the oozing scabs. I never even got a chance to enjoy my natural hair... all because she was using the wrong products and lacked the patience to do my hair I'd never put a baby through that.

And yes I know someone that gave a 1 year old a relaxer Needless to say, she was a drug addict. What's everyone else's excuse?

 

[jainygirl]

I was 6 y/o and it stayed that way for 22 years. -- jainygirl

 

[donna894]

I was about 13 or 14 when I got my first relaxer. Before that, I remember sitting on the floor in front of my mother's chair as she pressed and curled my hair. It was no picnic!! Over time the relaxers thinned my hair out. Now I'm back to wash and press once a week and my hair has thickened back up.

 

[karezone]

at least 9 or 10.