Okay! So I am just gonna assume he died!

I think ignoring him is giving him an easy out. Next time you see him confront him. You don't have to want to go out with him, but hold him accountable for his actions.

21 months natural and loving it!
 
funny but it's true. u r not the only one to deal w/ that OP..lol. i love the response of now acting like ur dead "when" he finally calls:lol:
 
nadaa16 said:
I think ignoring him is giving him an easy out. Next time you see him confront him. You don't have to want to go out with him, but hold him accountable for his actions.

21 months natural and loving it!
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and say what?


i wouldn't. da next time i saw him, i would treat him as if he died, just like OP said. I would act as if he didn't exist and keep it movin.

in this day and age, i don't care what kinda phone u have, whether you got it from a corner store bodega, da 7-eleven, wal-mart, or one of dem phones they advertise on tv for senior citizens wif da big numbas on it, every phone will say ONE MISSED CALLED or have that lil envelope lettin u know that u got a text.

even if ur phone is turned off. when u turn it back on, ur phone sends u a signal dat basically says "hey, someone called and someone sent u a text"

i hate when people come off and say my phone was on the charger, or i didn't get the text.....
 
I agree with leaving sleeping dogs lie. I would go the the reunion lookin like fiyah and say not one red word to him and not even acknowledge his existence.
 
To see him and not speak will be a whole lot of work for a seemingly worthless person. She would be getting herself all dolled up and looking for a guy who doesn't want her (no offense) just so she can NOT speak to him. to me that seems really high schoolish. However, going up to him and confronting him would 1) give her closure to the situation so that she can move on with her life, and maybe even learn something. 2) she would make sure he saw the full extent of what he could no longer dream of having. 3) spoil his plans and take control of the situation.
She doesnt have to confront him dripping with attitude. she can make a joke out of it IRL as she did in the OP.
Sample convo:
OP: oh hey, so glad to see you arent dead or incarcerated. so there must of been something that kept you from our engagement, that or you're just a coward? (flirty laugh)
him: gives some random excuse.
OP: Well I guess I'll see you whenever. Really glad you're not dead!
 
I think she should ignore him unless he speaks first. If and when he does acknowledge her, she should smile, keep things brief and then kindly excuse herself. I think it is important to show him that you aren't even sweating how he rudely stood you up. I wouldn't even bring it up. Now confronting him and demanding an explanation or telling him off would not be something I would do.:nono:
 
Hi-yaaaahhhhhh men are a mess!! :lachen:

This happened to me before...I met this dude and he started texting me a few days later (3 day rule). So after a few days of texting he asks me out, we pick a place, he asks what time I'm done working, yadda yadda. This was on Wednesday, we were supposed to meet on Friday. Thursday rolls around...no time confirmation...Friday...nada. So then on Saturday, homeboy texts me like NOTHING HAPPENED. Like, "Hey, what's up?" I was with my friends and was like, "Oh no this ninja didn't..." So I didn't answer...Then, like every few days he'd text me again...still, no answer.

**Sidenote** How come when I girl texts a guy and he doesn't respond and she texts him again it's considered crazy stalking, but when a guy does it, it's okay?! **End Sidenote**

Anyway, he's still doing this by next Friday and I'm out with one of my friends, and get some "liquid courage," so I was just like, "No thank you, I didn't appreciate that last week, you messed up." And he starts texting me back saying our plans weren't final and it was a miscommunication...which I could understand except I think it's rude to make even tentative plans with a person, not follow through, then talk to them as if nothing has happened. Anywho, I wasn't mad and felt good I told him that was wack and he kept texting me for a bit to make plans or see where I was, but every time I was out with a friend or about to do something. He eventually stopped trying.

OP, have you ever read "He's Just Not That Into You"? Seriously, it's a funny book but it's soooo true. If a guy actually likes you, he will make the effort needed, no excuses. In this day and age, it's virtually impossible for one to be too busy to return a text or phone call. It's just that they simply do not care. OH, and for every self respecting woman out there, there are three thirsty heauxs that will put up with that tomfoolery, so which will most men pick?? One of my friends told me that even if a guy is interested in a girl, before the first date he doesn't really even care because he still doesn't know her, which is fine...but uhhh, am I supposed to make an effort? So I guess they want to see how much bs you'll put up with before they decide they like you? Chile please.

And what is with men not contacting you for months then coming out the woodworks? Once I went on one date with a guy and he never called me (I think he thought I was too much like one of the guys, fine, next), but then he started texting me for holidays?!??! I was like ummmm we aren't friends....
 
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In 2011, we should know all the signals by now. Ain't nothing new. This dude has blown OP off because he clearly had a change of heart. Maybe he did in fact die. There's nothing OP could do about that anyhow, she can't revive him. So I would just keep it moving. Even with this technology people are still the same, making excuses or just not communicating at all, which in itself is a message.

I say carry on as if he didn't exist and IF you run into him at the reunion; don't speak to him unless he speaks to you and keep is very formal and brief. You don't need to work that hard to figure out a man who actually blew you off. Don't go running behind him to confront him. All you will do is look crazy, because he clearly has communicated that you are not a priority. Give him the same message back.

Believe it or not, men don't like confrontation, so they communicate in a way that they think you will understand and that's through silence. Or some are just cowardly altogether. Because when you give them silence they know exactly what it means. It means they are being dumped or dissed. I'm sure ever woman on here has done something similar.
 
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I should be doing research right now, but nooooooo, I am here in this thread, :lachen: over every single post.


I hate y'all. :lachen:
 
:lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen: I didnt want her to be all ghetto in his face or anything. I mean confront and basically show him his petty acts didnt phase her and she is bigger than him. He doesnt have to say a thing, but her confronting the situation will make her look like the better person, and not a coward like him.

Xavier said:
I think she should ignore him unless he speaks first. If and when he does acknowledge her, she should smile, keep things brief and then kindly excuse herself. I think it is important to show him that you aren't even sweating how he rudely stood you up. I wouldn't even bring it up. Now confronting him and demanding an explanation or telling him off would not be something I would do.:nono:
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She is getting closure on the situation. She was/is obviously salty about everything if she took time out of her life to make a thread and talk about this man to a bunch of people neither of them really know. She would get the information exactly from the source, and not a bunch of women who dont even know this man. :yep:
MzLady78 said:
They didn't even make it to date number 1, what exactly is she getting closure on?
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CurlyMoo said:
In 2011, we should know all the signals by now. Ain't nothing new. This dude has blown OP off because he clearly had a change of heart. Maybe he did in fact die. There's nothing OP could do about that anyhow, she can't revive him. So I would just keep it moving. Even with this technology people are still the same, making excuses or just not communicating at all, which in itself is a message.

I say carry on as if he didn't exist and IF you run into him at the reunion; don't speak to him unless he speaks to you and keep is very formal and brief. You don't need to work that hard to figure out a man who actually blew you off. Don't go running behind him to confront him. All you will do is look crazy, because he clearly has communicated that you are not a priority. Give him the same message back.
I never said for her to run behind him, but if she did happen to see him in her proximity say something. Be cause in reality life is way to short for petty behavior. This man could actually be gone the next day. and she would have on her heart, how rude she was to him the night before, and she would still be in the dark as to what ever happened.

Believe it or not, men don't like confrontation, so they communicate in a way that they think you will understand and that's through silence. Or some are just cowardly altogether. Because when you give them silence they know exactly what it means. It means they are being dumped or dissed. I'm sure ever woman on here has done something similar.
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Nobody really like confrontation. Which is why you do it. Take people out of their comfort zone.
 
Katherina said:
IDK if you meant it to be funny but this had me :lachen::lachen::lachen:

What happened in 2nd grade?
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Lol it is funny...they are weird and from Mars. 2nd grade when boys would pick on a girl because they didn't know how to say they liked her. Idk how many used to pull my hair or write stupid stuff in my notebooks.

I honestly think she should let it go for now. If dude comes back around and you are still into him, be verra cautious.

Sent from my ADR6300 using ADR6300
 
i had a dude JUST do this to me.
then had the nerve to send me an unwanted picture of himself the next day!!!

men can be such idiots fa real girl, faa real.
 
Yep, you got stiffed. So, go to your reunion. Don't ask questions. Be cordial to everyone. Don't follow him with your eyes and don't avoid him like the plague at all. Act like you don't remember there was a date. Don't give him any satisfaction. It will KILL him!~ LOLOL
 
MzLady78 said:
They didn't even make it to date number 1, what exactly is she getting closure on?
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I was wondering this same thing like huuuuuuuhhhhh whey dey do dat at. UUUHHHMMM OP just KIM wth its no even that serious son son dont exist as of that day
 
Guitarhero said:
Yep, you got stiffed. So, go to your reunion. Don't ask questions. Be cordial to everyone. Don't follow him with your eyes and don't avoid him like the plague at all. Act like you don't remember there was a date. Don't give him any satisfaction. It will KILL him!~ LOLOL
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yessssss....and make sure you look FLYYYYYYYYY:yep:
 
Did MsBoinglicious ever come back and said what he explained happened? If anything, I think this was a part of his "training" process :look: Men do consciously train women on what to expect from themso that they can turn around and say after a woman's been disappointed, "I don't know why you thought that" :yep:
 
Nah he's not dead honey. Don't feel bad, you aren't the only one. Been there done that. The guy that stood me up texted me and everything with a date and time but no restaurant. He said he would text me the name of the restaurant once he had that figured out. Two days go by and no text from him. Here comes the day of the date and about 2 hours before our meet time, he texts with this long drawn out story of how he was busy with work blah blah and lets reschedule. I said okay when and where. Silence. Almost a week later he calls me. I refuse to answer and even listen to the voicemail. Sorry, been up that tree to many times. Sounds like to me his attention was elsewhere. Maybe there was some other woman. Who knows and who cares. Keep it rolling sista!
 
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