Not Pretty Enough to Be Natural?

[LadyKaypnyc]

I don't necessarily think long hair is prettier. Some people look good with short hair others don't.

I'm really not concerned with length, I joined this forum to learn how to care for my hair better and to avoid the drama and mean spiritedness of other forums. I'm not partial to any particular length...

 

[DivaD04]

I love this quote: "Beauty is the eye of the beholder"- Margaret Wolfe Hungerford


okay I have an ovaled-peanut head, one inch of pure beauty!...

If somene told me I don't have the face for my "OWN TEXTURE...I'll just have to brush those HATERS off! God gave me my natural look...and for someone to take the time and tell me my face doesn't fit..hmm! Natural can be worked with to "fit" the face. Whether it is to be accented with braids, beads, smils, make-up, eyebrows, a short cut, long...etc, that's up to the one who has to wear their hair.
I think folks in Kenya....by the way I LOVE those pics MissAlyssa...Tanzania, shoot folks in Africa who where there hair natural are simply beautiful none taken from relaxed heads. But I think natural comes in all different shapes and sizes heads on down to the feet and still possesses beauty.

If one does not feel they possess "natural beauty" what makes you think someone else will.

I hold my beauty from within, no one can take it because it's my truth to the end
-me!

 

[nomadpixi]

Those models were gorgeous! Me, not so much
I'll admit, I tried the natural thing for almost a year, then accidentally texlaxed, which actually turned out kinda nice. I look lousy with a TWA, but tolerable with the pulled back puff. within 2 weeks of cutting my hair, I had someone refer to me as "Sir".

Never again...

I may go back to texlax at some point, but if I do I'll have at least 3 inches of hair.

Let's be honest, some girls look absolutely gorgeous, and short hair just lets you see more of that beautiful face. But my little pea head needs some hur.

 

[tinkat]

I don't agree with that statement...Why would you need to have the right face to wear your hair in a way that it was naturally made? If anything, I believe that natural hair brings out beautiful features....on anybody.

 

[discodumpling]

I think many people have an issue with short textured hair as opposed to a short pixie str8 cut.

People still fear the fro!
I loved my twa..didn't know I would miss it so much and wish I had spent a bit more time enjoying it before it morphed into my current mullet!

When I 1st cut my hair I felt BEAUTIFUL! I could finally see ME..all of me . Fat cheeks, big eyes, lucious lips! Unmistakeably WOMAN....i've never worn my womanhood on my head. IT's in my walk, my smile, and these baby making hips

 

[Aviah]

Imagine being told:

"Your texture is lovely...but...you don't really have the face for that sort of thing. You need the right features for natural hair."


What would your reaction be?

Are their really "right" features for being natural? How can my face not match what my DNA deems should come out of my head?

Could it really be true the way some people can't "play off" certain hair colors that some people can't "work" their natural hair? Does this mean certain women just aren't attractive with their natural texture (WHATEVER that texture may be)? Is that possible?


Please ignore the good hair vs. bad hair debate. This is more a hair-whatever-the-texture vs. the-face-it-frames issue.



What do you ladies think?

I hate to say it, but it may just be trueerplexed
Not that anyone isn't "pretty enough" to wear natural hair, and of course it is always the perogative of the person. But just like how long faces aren't advised (fashion-wise or whatever) to wear their hair pin straight (think Sarah Jessica Parker with dead straight hair vs. Joan from girlfriends with curly hair) or round faces are advised to stay away from curls that make the face look wider, it may be the same with natural hair. But then again, there are a HUGE amount of styles you could do to overcome that.
Then again, if someone really doen't care about all that, and they love natural hair then forget what the "rules" say, do it.

 

[hothair]

I textured hair on me kinky, coily, curly, wavy, back combed you name it - if its got volume I'm down The only reason I don't rock my own texlaxed hair is that its not long enough for the looks I like- so hopefully by Autumn....

I guess there are certain styles-as opposed to texturethat would work better for some, but I generally think most people look better/ softer with texturedhair (any kind)

 

[anon123]

That is nonsense. Looking better with certain styles is one thing, but not looking right with your own texture? Ridiculous. I really dislike the idea that a person's natural features aren't "in fashion". What else goes in and out of fashion? Nose types? Skin colors? Sorry, brown color 3A is out of fashion this season, you'll have to change to suit what magazines dictate. It's so silly, it's hard to even spend time giving it a legitimate response. If anything, I'm inclined to think there are more likely to be black people who don't look right with chemically altered hair because it doesn't look natural, it looks . . . altered. If anything, it's stick straight hair that doesn't match the features of black people because that's not what we have! But whatever, man, I can't deal with this nonsense.

 

[_belle]

people are probably going to gun me down for this. . . but in a way I totally understand this. if u have natural hair, especially longer bigger poofy natural hair, u will attract a lot of attention. . . so people just may not hve pretty faces.

But I will say that if a weave can hide/fix a person's face, than i am sure that something that showcases a person's face could have an adverse effect if u have a twa for example. . . if u have a twa, there is no bang, no swoops, not curl fallin in your face to distract people. so if u are ugly, u have "natural" hair (that society may consider ugly) and an ugly face. . .

I understand it, and I have seen ugly chicks with natural hair, but they aren't ugly because of their hair, they are ugly because of their face. its a lot easier to hide behind a big ole weave with a big ole bang. **and I don't mean to come off mean or anything, i am just simply sayin**

 

[DreadlockedLady0171]

That is nonsense. Looking better with certain styles is one thing, but not looking right with your own texture? Ridiculous. I really dislike the idea that a person's natural features aren't "in fashion". What else goes in and out of fashion? Nose types? Skin colors? Sorry, brown color 3A is out of fashion this season, you'll have to change to suit what magazines dictate. It's so silly, it's hard to even spend time giving it a legitimate response. If anything, I'm inclined to think there are more likely to be black people who don't look right with chemically altered hair because it doesn't look natural, it looks . . . altered. If anything, it's stick straight hair that doesn't match the features of black people because that's not what we have! But whatever, man, I can't deal with this nonsense.

What she said

 

[ladylibra]

Imagine being told:

"Your texture is lovely...but...you don't really have the face for that sort of thing. You need the right features for natural hair."


What would your reaction be?

Are their really "right" features for being natural? How can my face not match what my DNA deems should come out of my head?

Could it really be true the way some people can't "play off" certain hair colors that some people can't "work" their natural hair? Does this mean certain women just aren't attractive with their natural texture (WHATEVER that texture may be)? Is that possible?


Please ignore the good hair vs. bad hair debate. This is more a hair-whatever-the-texture vs. the-face-it-frames issue.



What do you ladies think?

i was told i didn't have the right facial features to pull off a twa. honestly... maybe i didn't... but you know what, i thought i was a cutie. and at the end of the day, THAT'S what matters.

i personally don't think everyone that tries to go blonde has picked a good color to complement their skin tone... but that doesn't stop them from going blonde now does it?

 

[_belle]

i was told i didn't have the right facial features to pull off a twa. honestly... maybe i didn't... but you know what, i thought i was a cutie. and at the end of the day, THAT'S what matters.

i personally don't think everyone that tries to go blonde has picked a good color to complement their skin tone... but that doesn't stop them from going blonde now does it?

 

[InnerSoul]

to me I feel that if your face is pretty for relaxers then it's pretty for an afro... your facial features don't change persay, however I think I know where the op meant by the question posed...hair styles perhaps?

I had thought that I would feel insecure esp right after I cut my hair off.. but that feeling didn't stay with me that long which I am surprised. I am confident to feel that my hair looks even better being natural b/c the thickness frames my face even better! of course this is JMO!

 

[InnerSoul]

i was told i didn't have the right facial features to pull off a twa. honestly... maybe i didn't... but you know what, i thought i was a cutie. and at the end of the day, THAT'S what matters.

i personally don't think everyone that tries to go blonde has picked a good color to complement their skin tone... but that doesn't stop them from going blonde now does it?

second the laughter on this one!!too funny, but what a great observation point!

 

[DreadlockedLady0171]

i was told i didn't have the right facial features to pull off a twa. honestly... maybe i didn't... but you know what, i thought i was a cutie. and at the end of the day, THAT'S what matters.

Whoever told u that didn't know what they were talking about
BTW Luv your hair

 

[bouncy]

i agree with what some of the posters touched on. i think the original comment hints at the old mentality (that we as a people can't get away from) - which is straight hair is right for everyone (i.e. straight hair is better & more versatile).

Curly, kinky, nappy (whatever your adjective preference may be) is for everyone too.

 

[LynnieB]

Imagine being told:

"Your texture is lovely...but...you don't really have the face for that sort of thing. You need the right features for natural hair."

What do you ladies think?

i'd think someone is doing a whole lot of projecting of their own personal issues onto you.

perhaps she/he is really holding onto that brainwashed way of thinking; she/he has never been exposed to the many styles of natural black women.

there's something for everyone.

afros and locs aren't the only styling option available for naturals but THEY ARE the type of stereotypical natural styles that immediately come to folks minds.

Natural hair is for any and everyone and brings out the beauty of all types of faces - and that's what stylists and barbers are for.

 

[BklynHeart]

Wow, some people still don't get it.erplexed So, if relaxers break your hair off, you should keep putting them in your hair because natural hair doesn't look good on you? A hair texture that comes NATURALLY out of your head?? I could see if she's saying long hair looks better or short hair looks better, but something that's already a part of you is UGLY?
Not only that, there are ALOT of ugly women running around here with long hair, so if some people are thinking that long hair will change that, more power to you.

 

[InnerSoul]

Wow, some people still don't get it.erplexed So, if relaxers break your hair off, you should keep putting them in your hair because natural hair doesn't look good on you? A hair texture that comes NATURALLY out of your head?? I could see if she's saying long hair looks better or short hair looks better, but something that's already a part of you is UGLY?
Not only that, there are ALOT of ugly women running around here with long hair, so if some people are thinking that long hair will change that, more power to you.

Yeah I totally agree with the bolded!

 

[cupcakes]

i think natural hair can look good on anyone..

 

[RegaLady]

I had a thread like this a while ago, but I wasn't as blunt. I wonder if natural can look safe with certain features. My cousin in law, has a very pretty face, so natural hair is considered 'cute' on her. I husband doesn't think my features are align with long, strait hair. Some people have opinions, you define your own look!

 

[DreadlockedLady0171]

I had a thread like this a while ago, but I wasn't as blunt. I wonder if natural can look safe with certain features. My cousin in law, has a very pretty face, so natural hair is considered 'cute' on her. I husband doesn't think my features are align with long, strait hair. Some people have opinions, you define your own look!

What do you mean by "safe"?

 

[hot_pepper96]

I'm offended for you (even though I'm not natural). It's awful when someone makes you doubt yourself when it comes to your appearance. I say shake it off and do your thing. If you ignore the "hating", you'll begin to see how wonderful you look with your natural hair.

Another thing as a woman with relaxed hair, I've started to feel envious of ladies that I see on the metro rocking natural hair, even though I know I personally don't want to be natural right now. I just look at their hair and think out beautiful it looks! So for every person that hates, there might be someone else looking at you and wishing their hair was natural like yours.

 

[ladylibra]

I had a thread like this a while ago, but I wasn't as blunt. I wonder if natural can look safe with certain features. My cousin in law, has a very pretty face, so natural hair is considered 'cute' on her. I husband doesn't think my features are align with long, strait hair. Some people have opinions, you define your own look!

i think i remember that thread... where you thought most of us natural girls were "non-threatening" with our looks. something about people not assuming we were militant, right? i believe that's what the original post said, too lazy to do a search...

 

[MonPetite]

I had a thread like this a while ago, but I wasn't as blunt. I wonder if natural can look safe with certain features. My cousin in law, has a very pretty face, so natural hair is considered 'cute' on her. I husband doesn't think my features are align with long, strait hair. Some people have opinions, you define your own look!

What do you mean by "safe"?

Herein lies some of the issue that I think needs more probing. It's not a style issue. It's a "are your features pretty enough to 'make up' for your natuaral texture" issue. Whatever that could mean -and please don't dissect THAT, as it would be getting slightly off topic.

Now:

Take Eva Pigford...green eyes, straight, high-bridged nose, slim lips....Is she a "safe" natural?

Or is someone who is more broad featured like myself with West African/Samoan looking features "safe" too?

Or should I count it all joy I'm in the Honey club and that "makes up" for my broad features and natural hair?

I'm on the side of being offended, but I'm trying to keep an open mind. If my features AREN'T right for my hair...is it a matter of being too black and others need to get over thier issues....Or am I really just urgly?

 

[onejamifan]

I think this is a very interesting thread as I was having this same conversation with my mother a few days ago. I told her that I had thought about transitioning and asked her opinion on the matter.... well, she said to me, "your features are too sharp for natural hair." WTF? She's always said my features are too sharp for short hair, but NATURAL hair?? She says it does not go with my personality or my "look" (for some reason people think I look Indian) and that long straight hair is the only thing that would look good on me...However, when I rock a textured style, I get more compliments on my hair than when I wear it straight...

(sigh)....

So needless to say, that conversation did not end well

 

[RegaLady]

What do you mean by "safe"?

WOW,Wow, wow! Don't beat me up, I meant what society meant as 'safe'! I love natural hair. But, I wondered if society looks at different black women with natural hair, as militant or safe. Some of these women are portrayed in commercials, or modeling in Sears magazines. Then you have some, where the black man is looking down on her. Hey, I know I am cute, but I am one of those few who have been told I look better with shorter hair, and long hair does me no justice. Now what does that mean? I am not sure if I should feel insulted. There is nothing bad with rocking what God has blessed you with, NOTHING! But, there are certain hairstyles that ...err, bring out our beauty a bit more. And contrary to any belief, I think that straight hair is more determinant on a women's features.

 

[DreadlockedLady0171]

WOW,Wow, wow! Don't beat me up, I meant what society meant as 'safe'! I love natural hair. But, I wondered if society looks at different black women with natural hair, as militant or safe. Some of these women are portrayed in commercials, or modeling in Sears magazines. Then you have some, where the black man is looking down on her. Hey, I know I am cute, but I am one of those few who have been told I look better with shorter hair, and long hair does me no justice. Now what does that mean? I am not sure if I should feel insulted. There is nothing bad with rocking what God has blessed you with, NOTHING! But, there are certain hairstyles that ...err, bring out our beauty a bit more. And contrary to any belief, I think that straight hair is more determinant on a women's features.

Not trying to beat u up...just wondering.

 

[BrownEyez22]

Hmm, this is an interesting thread, I haven't had a chance to read it all, but me and my best friend had a convo about this not too long ago. I am interested in going natural but I kinda felt like I needed to get my skin together and battle some other issues before really really did this. I know in my case its more of a confidence issue like someone else said.

My friend also felt to be natural and really rock it, you should kinda have everything pulled together/polished look i.e. make-up, clear skin, clothing ect.,....I am not sure if this is right or wrong way to think, but maybe relaxed (straightened) hair distracts from flaws in some peoples minds more than textured hair does.

 

[LynnieB]

Hmm, this is an interesting thread, I haven't had a chance to read it all, but me and my best friend had a convo about this not too long ago. I am interested in going natural but I kinda felt like I needed to get my skin together and battle some other issues before really really did this. I know in my case its more of a confidence issue like someone else said.

My friend also felt to be natural and really rock it, you should kinda have everything pulled together/polished look i.e. make-up, clear skin, clothing ect.,....I am not sure if this is right or wrong way to think, but maybe relaxed (straightened) hair distracts from flaws in some peoples minds more than textured hair does.

i don't buy that right dare and you don't have to buy what she's selling either.

so her argument is that a woman wearing straight up 5th Avenue attire yet her hair is worn in a dry, tore up, broken, raggedity, colorfaded 2 track ski-slope pony tail ~or~ broken off hair in a bun with split ends sticking all of out it like a porcupine would look better than woman wearing her natural hair in a twa or a puff in the same attire?

extreme comparison i know but i'm just saying.........nah-nah and naaaaaaaaaaah.

sis, give ole girl something to think about next time she passes that argument onto you. yall know that out on the street we see more rough and ragged than we do healthy and swangin, all day every day.