No Man Wants A Nasty Woman:How Neat Are You?

[Guitarhero]

I was listening to none other than a cooking channel (amateurs on YT) and got a dose of in-your-face high and mighty "truth" on how to keep your home clean. The goal of this advice was to make sure you could 1)get a man and 2)keep the one you landed. She also said that even nasty men don't want nasty women - read, those who keep a messy home. Mind you, this lady is 500 lbs. I don't care how much makeup you put on it....but anyhoo.

Is this something cultural? Because I then turned to PattiLaBelle (she should stick to singing) recipes on her YT channel and she mentioned something similar. She is divorced. So, what say you?

In my unimportant opinion, I think it depends upon just how nasty (is it roach-infested or competitive with Hoarders?) your environment is. But it disgusted me to think that there are bands of women around who think that they are "keeping" their husbands faithful and in the home because of the amount of cleaning of baseboards and behind toilets. Um, no...that's not keeping him home. Besides, it might apply to a poor man because a rich guy would just hire a cleaning service. Be reasonably clean for your own health and safety but this female pissing contest of stratification is useless.

 

[LongTimeComing]

Nobody wants nasty friends or mates in my opinion. Clutter is ok, nasty is never acceptable. So I can see where a man (because I do the same) would make surface judgements about the person if their house smells, they have roaches, and hair is all over the bathroom.

I personally keep my house clean for me, not for a man.

 

[Klearli]

Mmm...I kind of disagree. Because if the home isn't a sanctuary, who wants to be there? In our relationship I'm the messy one. And when I have things clean and soft and comfortable, he's more apt to want to relax in the living room or bedroom with me rather than in his office. I sometimes clean obscure things (obscure to me, but normal to him), and he always notices. "Aww babe, look at you all dusting! *kiss kiss*"

But of course keeping house alone isn't going to keep a man. Its just one thing that helps keep peace and sanity in the home, IMO.

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[ChasingBliss]

While I'm sure most men appreciate neat clean women, I hardly think that will be the force that keeps him. A straying man will stray regardless. It's his heart.

I'm a clean neat freak and he very much appreciates that about me, but does that keep him with me and faithful...No...his decision to love me and respect our relationship does that. His moral base takes care of that Period.

 

[Windsy]

There's a difference between Neat and just plain ole Nasty.....

I think some men will tolerate a not so neat woman and some will tolerate a nasty woman because they're just as nasty themselves.

 

[Guitarhero]

I can't stand too much clutter but this person was going on and on about washing walls and if your patio door has little kids fingerprints on it, you're just class-less. ????? LOL. Did I mention she's about 500 lbs.? Seriously! She's over 400 or so. It's a pissing contest. But then again, so many people buy into this. Be neat and clean for your family's standards...but that won't keep a marriage, actually. Shrugs.

 

[knt1229]

Well if he nasty and was raised with nastiness he might not mind

Cleanliness is something that shouldn't have to be requested. It's something I expect so I wouldn't really pay alot of attention to someone who advised me in this way. IDK....but I think some of these "truths" say more about the people speaking said truth than the supposed implied wisdom. In other words, only someone who is around nastiness would feel the need to share this type of advice.

 

[SilentRuby]

Most men hate nasty, despise clutter but will usually put up with things being out of place moreso than just plain out nasty.

Oh yea, I'm kinda over being sexy 24/7, keeping the home immaculate 24/8, cooking thanksgiving dinner meals three times a day everyday, raising the kids, and managing the household in order to "keep" a man. Some of these same women doing ALL of this are getting divorces or being cheated on.

I definitely think you should do these things but the excessiveness of it all just kinda disgusts me.

 

[locabouthair]

Nobody wants nasty friends or mates in my opinion. Clutter is ok, nasty is never acceptable. So I can see where a man (because I do the same) would make surface judgements about the person if their house smells, they have roaches, and hair is all over the bathroom.

I personally keep my house clean for me, not for a man.

ITA! There's a difference btwn messy and just plain nasty. It's good to have a cleat neat house but I'm not gonna clean just to keep a man.

 

[Chioniso]

what do you consider 'nasty'

 

[nubiennze]

What woman wants a nasty man--especially one who expects her to clean up after him in order to "keep" him...? I doubt anyone wants anyone nasty, but why are women the only ones to whom cleanliness is prescribed?

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I'm a neat freak. My mom always told me about a male cousin who told her, "A woman who will keep a nasty house, will keep a nasty arse." I don't want no man perceiving me in that way so I keep my body, as well as my space clean and neat.

ETA: OP, why are you mentioning how much the woman weighs?

 

[Phoenixsky13]

Hmm I know I can't stand a nasty arse man. If a man can't keep his place clean I will not date him. It's just gross to me and I do make the connection of nasty home means nasty personal hygiene in men and women I know. I would think that everyone would prefer a cleaner indiviual. But I know that some people just don't care. yuck!

 

[cherryhair123]

I have come to the realization from past experience as much as I hate to admit it-it does matter a lot to men how you keep your home ask some of your male friends and relatives your SO might not admit it out of fear of retaliation

 

[Klearli]

I'm a neat freak. My mom always told me about a male cousin who told her, "A woman who will keep a nasty house, will keep a nasty arse." I don't want no man perceiving me in that way so I keep my body, as well as my space clean and neat.

ETA: OP, why are you mentioning how much the woman weighs?

I think, and OP can answer, that while this woman is judging about unkempt houses, maybe other people might be judging about unkempt bodies.

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[FemmeFatale]

OT: but has anyone noticed how neat men are? ALL of the men I've dated have been neater than me and I'm neat! Even my male colleagues are super neat.

 

[january noir]

Sort of OT: I was looking at some YouTube vids and one I started to watch was about a woman using the LUSH henna. Her house was a shambles! Pots and pans all over her kitchen, stuff all over the floor (clothes, toys, garbage, you name it). I couldn't even finish watching the video, but I did post a comment.

I suggested that she clean up her house or surrounding area before making videos because I couldn't stop being distracted by the tsunami of trash in the background.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I think, and OP can answer, that while this woman is judging about unkempt houses, maybe other people might be judging about unkempt bodies.

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If that is the case, OP would be participating in the "pissing contest" that she's accusing the woman of. What's the difference? Of course, I hope that's not the case.

 

[UrbainChic]

I have a friend who is the biggest slob i have ever known. Her mom still has to come help her clean her place. Girl always ALWAYS has a boyfriend.

 

[Guitarhero]

I'm a neat freak. My mom always told me about a male cousin who told her, "A woman who will keep a nasty house, will keep a nasty arse." I don't want no man perceiving me in that way so I keep my body, as well as my space clean and neat.

ETA: OP, why are you mentioning how much the woman weighs?

Because her harping on fingerprints on patio doors is overcompensating for her size which was HUMONGOUS! I'm not talking about a few extra pounds...this woman was seriously morbidly obese. Now, she's going on and on about being made-up and cooking fabulous homestyle meals (with uber fat all day long) and harping on fingerprints on the wall? Um, it's not general clutter that is dangerous here. She's overcompensating for her personal flaws.

 

[Guitarhero]

If that is the case, OP would be participating in the "pissing contest" that she's accusing the woman of. What's the difference? Of course, I hope that's not the case.

The examples I provided don't equate to "nasty." If you wash walls every Saturday, that's fine, but don't tell women that they aren't wife material because they don't do the same. Her kind of "nasty" isn't truly nasty, it's just less obsessive than her (glass doors). Her advice reminded me of my aunt whose advice on how to keep a husband is "fix his plate."

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I understand, OP.

 

[Theo]

I really don't know how much men care. I'm the messiest person I know, and I'm always dating somebody

(And no... I'm not sleeping with them)

When I get married, I plan to employ a cleaning serviced during the years that I'm working. At least until the kids are old enough to take on chores. I'm going to be busy, and I would prefer to spend the time I have at home sharing quality time with the hubby and the kids. The only domestic duties I plan to take on is cooking and doing my husband's laundry and dry cleaning. Just cuz I like to cook, and I like the idea of taking care of my husband's laundry/dry cleaning. Don't ask me why.

 

[Mai Tai]

OT...Guitarhero January_noir ... Can you all post links to these videos because I would love to see what you all are referring to.

I will say this...I know for myself, I absolutely cannot and will not become serious with a man that is cluttered or messy. I am a huge neat freak. Everything has to have its place and I clean little by little throughout the week to avoid having to do one HUGE occasional cleaning.

 

[Renewed1]

I dated a guy when I was in my nasty phase. He complained all the time. So I told him he was more than welcome to clean my house.

But I'm a lot cleaner now and getting better organized.

 

[MissJ]

I'm sorry, but I know a nasty woman who got herself a husband. He didn't seem to care.

 

[MissJ]

Because her harping on fingerprints on patio doors is overcompensating for her size which was HUMONGOUS! I'm not talking about a few extra pounds...this woman was seriously morbidly obese. Now, she's going on and on about being made-up and cooking fabulous homestyle meals (with uber fat all day long) and harping on fingerprints on the wall? Um, it's not general clutter that is dangerous here. She's overcompensating for her personal flaws.

Post the video, so we can see what 400 lbs looks like.

 

[barbiesocialite]

I really don't know how much men care. I'm the messiest person I know, and I'm always dating somebody

(And no... I'm not sleeping with them)

When I get married, I plan to employ a cleaning serviced during the years that I'm working. At least until the kids are old enough to take on chores. I'm going to be busy, and I would prefer to spend the time I have at home sharing quality time with the hubby and the kids. The only domestic duties I plan to take on is cooking and doing my husband's laundry and dry cleaning. Just cuz I like to cook, and I like the idea of taking care of my husband's laundry/dry cleaning. Don't ask me why.

Most men don't care.

I call my life organized chaos. I always have a man or am dating somebody. Men just offer to hire a cleaning service.....


ETA: I'm just messy, my homegirl has animals all over the place; Don't know when the last time it was that she cleaned. That place is funk-ay! She stays with a man too, and not just any ole avg joe either....

 

[nysister]

I can't stand too much clutter but this person was going on and on about washing walls and if your patio door has little kids fingerprints on it, you're just class-less. ????? LOL. Did I mention she's about 500 lbs.? Seriously! She's over 400 or so. It's a pissing contest. But then again, so many people buy into this. Be neat and clean for your family's standards...but that won't keep a marriage, actually. Shrugs.

Yeah I'm a pack rat, and hubby has been around for years.Not to insult anyone be he's one of those people that consider being morbidly obese "unseemly" so if I were 400 pounds there's no amount of cleaning that would make him think that I was anything but... "nasty" so to speak.. So between the two he's happy to deal with a few extra papers around. Besides that's what housekeepers are for. He can feel free to hire one whenever he likes. I really don't consider it my duty to clean the house as if I were it's servant. I clean some and tell him to hire someone or clean the rest...He cleans it.

Most men don't care.

I call my life organized chaos. I always have a man or am dating somebody. Men just offer to hire a cleaning service.....

Oh I like that! I always say there's a method to my madness. Besides the dishes are cleaned and the laundry is done, what more can a man ask for on that front.

 

[Evolving78]

no it won't because i stayed on my hands and knees cleaning and my ex-husband still was out doing his thing and acting like a butthole. but i do believe keeping the home neat is good for the soul. i hate coming home to a messy house. my nerves can't take it. i know when i tie the knot again, my man will appreciate me keeping our home clean, but i know better than to think it will keep his butt in line. that's something he has to do on his own.