EXCUSE THE TYPO's
Some guys that call themselves nice are actually nice, but then there’s the flip side.
After reading a few books this summer, I did some “experiments” based upon what I was reading.
These men are very slick. They have a number of approaches. They will try to make it look like they are taking their time to get to know you. When in fact, they are listening to every word you say, observing your body language and reactions to what they are saying to you … they use that information to move in to become you SoulMate or what ever it is that they think you need. But watch out … if you listen closely to these guys, they are wishy-washy and a number of other things too!
What I mean is … let me give you an example:
The subjects of kids come up. He says that he can see himself with 3 kids and doesn’t want to waste his time dating a woman that does not want kids.
FAST FORWARD
You mention a week later that you do not want kids … in fact, if God presented 2 soulmates to you … one wanted kids the other didn’t, to be on the safe side, you would choose the one that did NOT want kids.
1 MINUTE LATER
Mr. Nice guy changes his story from the previous week and says, that he realized that he really did not want kids, what was most important was having someone to share his life with.
NOTE: if you are observant, you will find lots and I mean lots of holes in his stories. He‘s like a Chameleon so that he can appear to be everything that he thinks you need and want.
As someone earlier mentioned, Mr. Nice Guy will talk about how he has been hurt and does not understand why, since he’s so nice. Of course, something is wrong with the women and not him. I met a nice guy like that this summer. Interesting! These guys usually tell on themselves early on. This particular one told me that he scared off the last girl he met by taking things too fast and that he’s trying to learn from that experience. Also, his apartment smelled like pet farts/butt (7 pets). YUCK. Funky! Now, him trying to learn from the experience may be true, but really … !
Another sick thing Mr. Nice Guy might do, and yes, some of these guys intentionally do things like this …
They will do something to “slightly” betray your trust. It will usually be something that they could choose to not tell you and you may never know. However, they WILL tell you what they did later on. This is a sick way to gain your trust. Their words may sound like this, “ I did xyz … I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have done that. I just want to tell you and be up front and honest. I don’t want there to be any secrets between us.” There you are thinking, “Ahhhhwwww, he could’ve kept it to himself and lied, but he was honest.” Bazinga – you were just screwed by Mr. Nice Guy!
Be careful of the Mr. Nice Guy Married Man too. I think they are hilarious and will say almost anything to get you to sleep with them. A common one is, “ My wife will not have sex with me anymore.” There are a few sides to that:
#1 It’s true. But he’s married and it’s NOT your problem. He just wants to get in your pants. They probably had sex the previous day or at least week.
#2 Even if you would consider a married man … here’s something to think about!!! If his wife does not want to have sex with him, WHY THE HECK WOULD YOU!!! Most women do not ignore their husbands sexually for NO reason at all. There’s almost ALWAYS a VERY good reason. My thought is this, “if you wife doesn’t want you, I don’t either.”
#3 They may even go so far as to tell you, “You are the only woman I have EVER been tempted by and attracted to since my wife.” RED LIGHT … he says this thinking and hoping that you will be flattered by hearing that. Let him be attracted or tempted by you. It’s not you’re problem … keep it moving. He’s probably said that to 3 other women that week too!
Then there’s the Mr. Nice Guy I Have A Shady Past. When you first meet them, they will tell you how nice they are and most of his friends know what he stands for… and blah blah blah … etc! Later … you find out all sorts of things. I met someone like this in Skandi-NEI-via.
There was a thread some months ago about dating a narcissistic man. The word charming came up a lot. If you listen carefully to these men, you realize that it’s not charm. What sounds like charm is just them grooming you, before they … (insert whatever it is that they want from you). It just manipulation! By listening carefully, I’ve learned that you can pretty much predict their every word and move. They are draining!
I could go on and on. I learned a lot of interesting things this past spring and summer. Hmmm, even the past 3 years has been interesting and a learning experience!!!
There are a lot of wonderful men out there 
It's the Mr. Nice Guys that are preying on you that we have to watch out for.
erplexed IMO being nice is what gets you through the door, a necessary but not sufficient factor on its own. When I decided to move home after an internship that took me out of the country for 2 months he ended all contact with me although he did e-mail my mom a couple times.
perplexed He was my first real guy-friend so it kinda hurt to lose the friendship. IMO it's contradictory for a 'Nice Guy' to become a jerk when he doesn't get the girl he likes because it poses the question if he was being genuinely nice or to get something out of it?
)andhow many guys proclaim to love their moms but promptly mistreat their woman. It's usually the guys proclaimingit to the rooftop.
. I met someone like this in Skandi-
I can laugh now, it wasn't funny at the time tho
i mean what else is he going to say? you've given him all the ammo he needs to manipulate you, and then by the time you start to notice the red flags, its too late. you don't want to leave him because he "gets" you. well you weren't all that hard to "get" now were you?
