Newbie Here :) (Long Post)

F

FlawedBeauty

Well-Known Member
Hi All,

I am new to the forum but have been lurking around for the last few days. I have to say some of the hair I have seen on here is gorgeous and a total inspiration! My hair is all messed up and I need help! It is super dry, super brittle, thin and breaks off everywhere. I decided that it's time to do something about it and this seems like the perfect place for support.

My hair is currently like 4 different lengths, all the growth if i were to part it from the half way point, the half down part is a little past my shoulders and everything above that is 4 inches or less. I'd say from the crown forward to my bangs is anythere from two to three inches. I don't want to cut it at all I just want to start making it more healthy so it starts to grow. My breakage is so bad I don't know if it's possible. My hair is so badly damages that I find that it doesn't have split ends, I get split middles!!!

Since reading here I have decided that I am going to stop using heat all together as that is probably really messing up my hair. I was literally ironing it everyday! Yes with a real iron! Bad, I know :ohwell: . I don't even want to put a comb in it seeing as it's so dry and brittle. Can anyone suggest a good hair regimine for my kind of super dry hair?

Well that's all for now I am really looking forward to beiing a member of this awesome forum!

Monique :)
 
First of all, welcome to the forum.

Have you considered CWs and baggying with a bun cover? Your description sounds a lot like my hair was when I first started (except mine was nape length at the longest) and that's what I did that really helped. Also, do you take a good multivitmain? Really, I think most peopel go through a trial and error period to find what works best for them but it sounds like you could use a lot of moisture and those two things (CWs and baggying) may be a good place to start.

HTH.
 
:) Hi and thanks for the welcome :)

CW, that would be conditioner wash? If so is that meean just washing with a conditioner no shampoo? I decided to start washing twice per week and deep conditioning 1x a week. Before that I think maybe I would wash 2x a month for fear that my hair couldnt take it. I want to try the baggy method but I can never find a color to match my hair to cover the bag...this is a pic of me http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g220/monique2486/785880366_m.jpg

I'm black and white but got my hair form the black side of my family :) That pic makes my hair appear to be in ok condition but its really a hot mess!! Also I want to wrap my hair at night but I dont want to use a comb to wrap it. Would it be as effective to put it in a braid and cover it for the night? Thanks for your help and suggestion. Oh, what do u find to be a good to use for a CW? I'm also afraid of over conditioning.
 
:wave: Welcome FlawedBeauty!

Believe me, we've all been where you're at. If you do some searches and read through some of the posts, I'm pretty sure you'll find some great advice. Like the last member stated, this is a trial and error phase for you. You will need to find what works for your hair, because what works for me, may not work for you.

No one can tell you that "this" is a great shampoo for you or "that" will leave your hair really moisturized.

My greatest suggesting is start off with the inexpensive products 1st. You may find a lot of them work for you, instead of going out there and spending a lot of $$$$ on products that don't do squat for your hair.

A lot of the ladies here (including myself) are able to help you with product info and different styling techniques to get you started. Also I'm not sure if you seen this, but this is great info for newcomers.

http://journals.fotki.com/dontspeakdefeat/newcomer/

HTH!!!!:)
 
FlawedBeauty said:
:) Hi and thanks for the welcome :)

CW, that would be conditioner wash? If so is that meean just washing with a conditioner no shampoo? I decided to start washing twice per week and deep conditioning 1x a week. Before that I think maybe I would wash 2x a month for fear that my hair couldnt take it. I want to try the baggy method but I can never find a color to match my hair to cover the bag...this is a pic of me http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g220/monique2486/785880366_m.jpg

I'm black and white but got my hair form the black side of my family :) That pic makes my hair appear to be in ok condition but its really a hot mess!! Also I want to wrap my hair at night but I dont want to use a comb to wrap it. Would it be as effective to put it in a braid and cover it for the night? Thanks for your help and suggestion. Oh, what do u find to be a good to use for a CW? I'm also afraid of over conditioning.
Click to expand...

You're a pretty girl. :) It may be a little harder with your hair color to find a perfect match but I'm sure there are some out there. Also, phony-ponies will cover the baggie, too, and they maybe easier to find in lighter hair colors....especially at a place like Sally's (and I don't know why I think that).

When I CW, I get in the shower, wet my hair, apply conditioner, cover with a plastic cap, take my shower, turn the hot water down a tad until the water is the coolest I can stand it, rinse conditioner out. Right now, I'm bunning, not baggying but I have baggied and I have no regrets abou it. Cheapie conditioners IMO are the best for CWs...the VO5 cremes and Suaves (I can't use the humectant, though, personally).

Good luck. If you stick around here, I believe that you will find routines and products that work for you.
 
Thanks! Ok, well this may be a stupid question buuuuut, how do I know what is working for me? I have seriously tried like every product under the sun, from the extremely expensive to the super cheap. I have never really notice any difference in the way my hair felt when it was dry. When it was wet though I can tell that some products made my hair feel dried out while i was washing, if that makes any sense. CON makes my hair feel super soft and tangle free but does that mean its moisturizing my hair. I'm just kinda lost when being able to tell if something is working:perplexed . Is it possible for me to grow out my hair with all this breakage without cutting it all off first?
 
Just wanted to say hello and I know your beauty isn't flawed!
 
welcome. I'm just about a post graduate newbie one month in the making myself. First of all there is nothing flawed about your beauty.

But I started just at where you are and from like the other girls said trial and error, you find what works for you. Now in finding what works for you read the sticky for newcomers starting out. I was the same with different products here and there and while some products made my hair feel good others made it feel better and some just not so good at all. I believe the first step is being properly educated on what different products do like:

the deep condition
the misturizing, the clarifying, the protein
..and so forth
a lot of what I tried i was using improperly like using clarifyng shampoo as regular shampoo all the time and thiking a cheap conditioner staying on my head a little extra longer with a heat cap is deep conditioning. no don't laugh- seriously- i had no clue. But now in one month's time my hair has done a complete turnaround.

but donkspeakdefeat has a sticky out there to educate you and get you started, then you can go from there.
 
FlawedBeauty said:
Thanks! Ok, well this may be a stupid question buuuuut, how do I know what is working for me? I have seriously tried like every product under the sun, from the extremely expensive to the super cheap. I have never really notice any difference in the way my hair felt when it was dry. When it was wet though I can tell that some products made my hair feel dried out while i was washing, if that makes any sense. CON makes my hair feel super soft and tangle free but does that mean its moisturizing my hair. I'm just kinda lost when being able to tell if something is working:perplexed . Is it possible for me to grow out my hair with all this breakage without cutting it all off first?
Click to expand...

That is definitely a good sign, but you will still need a leave in conditioner. It is definitely possible to grow out the breakage without cutting it all off, but imo it is harder. I was able to successfully grow out the damage but had to get very creative with how to hide it.

I was at one time flat ironing or hot curling my hair daily, sometimes to the point of hearing my hair sizzle and I would always burn my hair right onto that curling iron but continued to do the same stupid stuff to my hair. There is hope for your hair, at this time I would reco to not use any direct heat at all, and try low maintenance styles.
 
flawed beauty, welcome to the forum

what I would suggest is that you get a good regimen going. shampoo and condition on a schedule, moisturize and take a vitamin (women's one a day at least) every day. also make sure to wrap your hair every night in a satin scarf.

Start of with any shampoo & conditioner that is made for dry, brittle hair. CON is pretty good for a starter. Also lots of people have success with Herbal Essences and Garnier Fructis. These companies also make good daily moisturizers (another good simple moisturizer is ORS Olive Oil). Unless the product makes your hair worse than it is, keep up the regimen for one month. You should see a difference by then.

Also try to stay away from products that have petroleum in it; petroleum clogs the hair shaft. keep the scalp clean; hair can't grow if the scalp is clogged. And use as little heat as possible. Blowdrying and flat ironing fry the hair shaft. Try airdrying and rollersetting. If you have to use heat, use the lowest heat setting and use a protectant on the hair (i.e. Dudley's Creme Press, Infusium 23)
 
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Thanks LadyJay! Now when u say wrap my hair is that just mean cover it with the scarf or should I wrap it around like a beehive. I'm afraid to comb it too much as it's soooo brittle. I already made a vow to stop using all heat as of Tuesday 9/5/06! Are the any other ingredients I should be leery of in my products besides petroleum? Also, should I throw in a moisturizer of some sort before wrapping? Oh, one more, lol...sorry I have more questions than I thought...my hair air dries within minutes, probably about 10 or 15...does it dry so fast because of how damaged and dry it is?
 
FlawedBeauty said:
Thanks! Ok, well this may be a stupid question buuuuut, how do I know what is working for me? I have seriously tried like every product under the sun, from the extremely expensive to the super cheap. I have never really notice any difference in the way my hair felt when it was dry. When it was wet though I can tell that some products made my hair feel dried out while i was washing, if that makes any sense. CON makes my hair feel super soft and tangle free but does that mean its moisturizing my hair. I'm just kinda lost when being able to tell if something is working:perplexed . Is it possible for me to grow out my hair with all this breakage without cutting it all off first?
Click to expand...

There are no stupid questions here:) We are all here to learn. But from this post, it seems like you are well on your way. When you use products and they make your hair feel dry while its wet, then it not good for you. It just means your hair will feel even more dry when it's dry.

You always want to find a moisturizing/detangling shampoo to start off with (start with a clarifying shampoo if you have a lot of build up). The conditioner depends on how your hair is feeling that day. Is it dry?, if yes, you need to use a moisturzing/softening conditioner.

Is you hair shedding a lot or breaking?, if yes, then it all depends on the extent of this. If you're experiencing severe breakage, then you'll need a hardcore reconstructor such as Dudley's DRC-28, KeraCare, Affirm 5-n-1, Nexxus Emergencee, Aphogee, etc. If you're shedding more than usual then you can use the lighter version of Aphogee, Motions CPR, or the hottest one on this board Ultra Sheen Duo Tex Protein Reconstructor.

When you start taking care of your hair, you'll need to start recognizing when your hair needs a little more TLC, whether is moisturizing, clarifying, shedding, breakage, etc. Once you've mastered this, no one can tell you how to take care of YOUR hair:D
 
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I would say I have severe breakage, well it seems severe to me anyways. How is severe breakage defined versus minimal? I am scared for some reason to use hardcore reconstructors because for some reason in my mind i feel like i will end up worse off than before. Also, when using reconstructors what is the procedure? I think I used one a while back but I wasn't sure if I was to condition after or what. Do i shampoo and condition and then reconstruct or vice versa? Also, are there any reconstructors that sell in SALLY's, I think I might want to pick one up this evening.

I'm so excited about whipping this mess into shape. I have always wanted to and told myself I would but then I would tell myself there is no point, my hair is my hair and it won't change...then I found this fabulous forum!!
 
Hey:yay: and welcome to LHCF! Im basically a newbie myself and when i first started on the forum i had the same questions as you. What helped me was asking questions(like you're doing) and looking at the ladies fotkis and regimes. Also, remembering that what may work for some may not work for others. Right now you need to find a good clarifying poo, moisturing poo, deep conditioner and protein treatment. We all can give tell you what products we are using and how they work for us-you then have to take that advice, look into the product and then make the decision of whether or not its right for you. A few products that i find to work good for me-and they may just work well for you-are:
Nacidit olive oil shampoo and avocado conditioner(dominicain products)
Nexxus Aloe Rid(clarifying poo)
Neutrogena Triple Moisture(NTM) cream lather poo(moisturizing poo)
NTM daily deep conditioner
Suave milk & honey(I usually add 1teaspoon of honey and 1teaspoon of EVOO to this conditioner and use it as a deep condioner or for my CW)
As for the protein treatment, right now im debating between Nexxus Emergencee and Sebastian's Penetraitt.
In my opinion, these are all very good products. This could be a start for you or do more research and find your own staple. One thing I definitely know you will benefit from is adding alittle honey and EVOO to your conditioners. you will notice that your hair feels softer and moisturized. HTH-good luck
 
HI! Welcome!

Im also a new joined member. I was a lurker for months until I also decided to get my hair into hairshape! I think asking question is great! I always think asking a question isn't only helping myself out but others! So, please ask for those that are also interested!

I don't have much advice, for I am just starting to get myself on a schedule with my hair, but I know the baggy really has helped my ends thus far!

Thats all I have for now!
 
FlawedBeauty said:
I would say I have severe breakage, well it seems severe to me anyways. How is severe breakage defined versus minimal? I am scared for some reason to use hardcore reconstructors because for some reason in my mind i feel like i will end up worse off than before. Also, when using reconstructors what is the procedure? I think I used one a while back but I wasn't sure if I was to condition after or what. Do i shampoo and condition and then reconstruct or vice versa? Also, are there any reconstructors that sell in SALLY's, I think I might want to pick one up this evening.

I'm so excited about whipping this mess into shape. I have always wanted to and told myself I would but then I would tell myself there is no point, my hair is my hair and it won't change...then I found this fabulous forum!!
Click to expand...

There's no reason to be scared of a reconstructor, they only can help your hair:D

I define severe breakage from when I had it. My hair was all over my sink, floors and clothes. Everytime I turned my head, there was a strand of hair flying off my head:eek: Also, breakage is when the strand of hair doesn't have a bulb on the end. But if your experiencing a little bit of hairs here and there, then you most likely have minimal breakage/shedding.

When using a reconstructor, always follow the manufacturer's directions. One thing I will add is when you rinse the recon. from your hair and you hair feels dry/tangled, follow-up with a moisturizing conditioner to soften and put moisture back in your hair.

I'm not a big fan of Sally's but I believe they carry aphogee reconstructor and the Ultra Sheen Duo Tex Protein Conditioner.
 
Thanks luv! I believe I have severe breakage. I can slide my fingers through it and pieces will snap off left and right. And like I mentioned before, I don't have split ends but split middles! These reconstructors are they basically made of mostly of protein?
 
FlawedBeauty said:
Thanks LadyJay! Now when u say wrap my hair is that just mean cover it with the scarf or should I wrap it around like a beehive. I'm afraid to comb it too much as it's soooo brittle. I already made a vow to stop using all heat as of Tuesday 9/5/06! Are the any other ingredients I should be leery of in my products besides petroleum? Also, should I throw in a moisturizer of some sort before wrapping? Oh, one more, lol...sorry I have more questions than I thought...my hair air dries within minutes, probably about 10 or 15...does it dry so fast because of how damaged and dry it is?
Click to expand...

cover the entire head with the scarf.

the best time to put in moisturizer is b4 you wrap the head w/ the scarf (usually b4 bedtime).

if your hair dries w/in minutes, then you not only have a breakage problem, but a porosity problem (probably due to the breakage & damage). you'll need a reconstructor treatment (Nexxus Emergencee, Aphogee, Dudley's DRC 28) and regular deep conditioning treatments (Bone Marrow put my hair back in shape).

Quite honestly, it sounds like you'll probaby need to cut the hair. Its uneven and sounds extremely damaged. I had to do the same when I started these boards. But cutting the hair isn't bad because its like a new start. You wont need to cut off all your hair, but just the part where it feels extremely hard.
 
FlawedBeauty said:
Thanks luv! I believe I have severe breakage. I can slide my fingers through it and pieces will snap off left and right. And like I mentioned before, I don't have split ends but split middles! These reconstructors are they basically made of mostly of protein?
Click to expand...

your hair is breaking off because it has no elasticity (elasticity is essential to hair growth). Reconstructor treatments infuse the hair shaft with proteins that help restore elasticity. but that's only one part of the process. then you'll need to keep the hair shaft clean and moist (via shampoo, deep conditioning and moisturizing). shampoo cleans the shaft of any dirt accumulated from normal wear (weather, dust, pollution, etc.). conditioning and moisturizing lock in moisture so elasticity is maintained.
 
Hey Flawed Beauty, welcome! :D

You say you have split ends and split middles...with that much damage, you may have to end up cutting your hair a bit. :( But let's try to whip it into shape and get it a bit stronger before we go there! :grin:

A reeconstructor treatment is definately in order...I've used Nexxus Emergencee when I am having severe breakage. Another great protein treatment that works for me is called Megatek, by Eqyss.

And when it comes to shampoo, try diluting it first...just get a big bottle, fill it with water, then add a little shampoo...shake it up and pour it on your scalp. Your hair gets just as clean. Or do the conditioner washes, just watch out for buildup.

And using a good moisturing conditioner is key. I just started using the Aveda DR line, and I can tell from the first use that it's made a difference on my hair. It's great stuff!

Don't worry, ask all the questions you want...we're here to help, and to learn ourselves! ;)
 
WomanlyCharm said:
You say you have split ends and split middles
Click to expand...

thats the funny part. i have practically no split end, my hair just starts to split in the middle i have noticed. for instance if i pull out a strand it will be straight till in the middle then still attached at the end, if that makes much sense...very annoying.
 
Welcome to the boards! I have to ditto all the other responses. The ladies on this board are the experts and such inspirations. Good luck on your hair recovery journey! :)
 
Hello! Can't give much advise but I can say welcome to the board and I hope that all you hair problems will be solved by these wonderful ladies!
 
FlawedBeauty said:
Hi All,

I am new to the forum but have been lurking around for the last few days. I have to say some of the hair I have seen on here is gorgeous and a total inspiration! My hair is all messed up and I need help! It is super dry, super brittle, thin and breaks off everywhere. I decided that it's time to do something about it and this seems like the perfect place for support.

My hair is currently like 4 different lengths, all the growth if i were to part it from the half way point, the half down part is a little past my shoulders and everything above that is 4 inches or less. I'd say from the crown forward to my bangs is anythere from two to three inches. I don't want to cut it at all I just want to start making it more healthy so it starts to grow. My breakage is so bad I don't know if it's possible. My hair is so badly damages that I find that it doesn't have split ends, I get split middles!!!

Since reading here I have decided that I am going to stop using heat all together as that is probably really messing up my hair. I was literally ironing it everyday! Yes with a real iron! Bad, I know :ohwell: . I don't even want to put a comb in it seeing as it's so dry and brittle. Can anyone suggest a good hair regimine for my kind of super dry hair?

Well that's all for now I am really looking forward to beiing a member of this awesome forum!

Monique :)
Click to expand...

:lol: :lol: :lol: gurl you funny! as for your problem i suggest you start feeding your hair moisture and lots of it!!! The neutrogena triple moisture line is great for coarse dry hair. i personally use nexxus and swear by it but something else might work for you. i suggest you wash and deepcondition your hair twice a week. make sure the conditioner sits on your hair for at least 15 minutes. use a hair moisturizer daily without fail.
 
FlawedBeauty said:
Thanks luv! I believe I have severe breakage. I can slide my fingers through it and pieces will snap off left and right. And like I mentioned before, I don't have split ends but split middles! These reconstructors are they basically made of mostly of protein?
Click to expand...

Hi FlawedBeauty - I'm also a newbie and wanted to welcome you aboard. I'm pretty sure that with all of the advice from the ladies...you'll be on the road to healthy hair in no time.
Right now my only advice to you is...PLEASE stop ironing your hair.:) That's probably what caused all of those split middles.:lol: Well mamas...best of luck to you.

aprilj
 
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