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Naturals: will you EVER go back to a relaxer?

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Are you natural forever?

  • Yes. I will never relax my hair again, ever.

    Votes: 373 84.4%

  • No. I will relax at some point in the future.

    Votes: 69 15.6%
  • Total voters
    442
  • Poll closed .
mischka said:
As kind of a spin off to the movement thread, it occurred to me that the difference in going natural or not will lie in whether people choose to go back to relaxing their hair down the line.

Me personally, I will never relax my hair again since, despite the practical implications of natural hair (healthier, less difficulty growing long) it is also a philosophical choice for me. My hard line on the natural vs relaxed debate is that I am not a white woman, and my hair is not naturally straight; therefore, I will not chemically alter my hair's appearance so that it appears naturally straight. I had a friend tell me she already looks ethnic enough - why did she need "ethnic" hair on top of that? And the sad thing was she didn't even realize what she was saying - that she wants to look "less ethnic." Toning down the blackness, if you will. (Maybe people won't notice if you have straight hair.) Well I'm "ethnic." I will look "ethnic." (Ironically, this friend was dating a white man... :look::ohwell:)

Anyway, once my sister saw how my hair was growing out, or due to some of the things she'd seen on the internet or the whole "growing hair long" movement from sites like these she decided to go natural too. The difference is, once her hair is a length she decides is acceptable, she plans to relax her hair again.

So, what say you? Is going natural only a means to an end to reach length goals or does it go a little deeper?
Click to expand...


In my experience lots of WM enjoy natural hair. All I can say is...hmmmm.
AA
 
No I won't relax my hair again.
Why?

I simply enjoy the thickness,extra softness, extra silkiness, the shine and my curls. When I flat iron, the straightness looks better than my relaxed hair. Then I also like the textured straightness that I get after several days. (think LeobodyC5) it was something I envied when I was relaxed(years ago) because my hair was flat..lol.

I am rewarded with current Midback hair going towards waist length which never happened with a relaxer in my experience. It can happen for some others but wasn't in my case.

I sure hope to be there around June-ish.

AA
 
ActionActress said:
In my experience lots of WM enjoy natural hair. All I can say is...hmmmm.
AA
Click to expand...


I've noticed this as well! I don't think white men are at all picky about black women and their hair. They seem to be far more accepting, and love it any way black women style it(especially if it is natural). Whether it is neat and natural, relaxed and raggedy, or somewhere in between...they could care less. :lachen:
 
makemild said:
Permed my hair at age 16 - My choice after years of pressuring my mother (Although she had a perm she didn't want her daughters to get one.) We both did. Do what I say not what I do, really doesn't work :-).

Leisure curled at age 18
Transitioned back to a permed at age 20/21
Natural again by age 22 - Mommie was sooooo happy. Pops too.
Will be 40 this year. I am concerned about chopping it all off as I have a tendency to do that more than I am concerned about perming again. I like both short and long hair on me. I am in a grow it long phase right now

HHG
Click to expand...

I had that "leisure" curl myself too. My history is similar.

Leisure curl at 17
Back to relaxed at 19
transitioned at age 23...natural until today. (at age--> **) :lol:

AA
 
I don't like to say what I will and won't do because in reality, you never know. But I don't see myself ever going back to a relaxer. My hair is healthier, retains length well, and I get way more compliments on it that I ever did when I was relaxed. And I hate the idea of putting such a harsh chemical on my scalp to have straight hair when I can just use my Sedu.
 
No more relaxers for me. My scalp and hair can't take it anymore. After watching my hair break off after my last touch-up I knew I wouldn't walk down that road again. I do think that one day I will thermalax my hair to get rid of some of the bulk. I love a ponypuff but I am having trouble finding holders that won't break from the shear volume of my hair-and I have only been natural for just under 2 years.
 
Honestly, I don't see it happening. I mean, thinking about relaxing is one thing, but actually going through with it... it just wouldn't be worth it. All of my relaxed life, my hair was short, broken off, and dry as a bone. Granted, I know how to better care for it now, but I don't see why I'd be willing to chance it. Retention wise, my hair is doing SOOOOOOO much better now than it ever did when I was relaxed. This winter I actually GAINED length rather than lost it, a feat I was never able to accomplish with relaxed hair.

Just yesterday I heard some women (all relaxed) talking about how damaging winter weather is to their hair. I could only smile to myself, thinking how that used to be the case for me too. I got through this past winter with just a fraction of the breakage I normally see, and even with that my hair is nearly SL, and it's never gotten that long before! :love2:
 
No, I will never relax again. My hair never thrived when I was relaxed and kept falling out. Natural hair is just better for me to maintain on a day to day bases. It's forced me to learn how to manage my hair and I Thank God for that everyday!
 
I never say never but I don't forsee myself relaxing again. My reasons aren't philosophical or connected to getting in touch with my roots. I've never had problems with my hair but I didn't like the way my hair looked relaxed and I hated going to salons and dealing with stylist. I didn't know how to stop relaxing without suffering from breakage and severe dryness. Stylist won't tell you how to transition. They just tell you to come in and get a relaxer. I've never been a wig or weave wearer so covering my hair is not an option. Once I learned how to transition I knew I had found what I needed and so far I'm happy with my decision. Other than my lack of styling it has been smooth sailing. FWIW, I wasn't good at styling as a relaxed head either. So that was nothing new for me.
 
I am too lazy to relax, I hate the hair dryer, rollers, curlers... I don't like being a slave to touch ups...

Although I would love an easier detangling process, or hair that STAYS straight... just not worth the damage.
And besides I love the versatility that natural hair gives me. Nope, uh huh, no relaxers for me.
 
BlackDiamond1 said:
No, there's no point in relaxing for me.

1. I have sensitive skin and relaxers are too harsh
2. IMO natural hair is more versatile
3. I co-wash almost everyday (even when I was relaxed) and put my hair in a bun....so I don't need any chemicals for that
4. I like my natural texture better than when my hair was relaxed
5. I'm not skilled enough to relax my own hair w/o overlapping or missing spots, and there's no way I'm gonna pay someone $75 or more to put a $10 relaxer in my hair
6. I like to color my hair, and I don't want to over process
7. My hair is healthier natural
Click to expand...


This!! I think some people forget how far $75 can go in this economy. There's no way I'm about to be a slave to something that can be costly when I can use a flat iron over and over again for one initial cost.


ETA: However I'm not gonna front. The main reason I don't see myself going back is because I hate sitting in the salon all day (I mean passionately hate it). I'm not much of a talker and the salons I've been to for some reason feel the need to ask about all of my personal business. Since August 2009 I have not stepped back into a salon and I AM THRILLED that I no longer feel the need to.
 
Last edited:
Actually, I've never had a relaxer.
I definitely don't see the point of ever getting one:
1) I'd have to re-learn the ins and outs of my hair. Doesn't sound fun.
2) My flat-iron skills are da bomb.com so when I want straight hair... i just plug in my flatiron.
3) $$$$$$$$$ I'd want to go to the salon for a professional relaxer, and just who would be paying for that ish? Not I, says the broke college student. :nono:
 
While I am of the never say never camp, I don't see a relaxer in my future. My hair was thin and thinning with each relaxer. The sheer amount of time its taken just to recover from that tells me that relaxing MY hair probably isn't a good idea.

I realize that hair styles and attitudes will change in the future, but there are also good alternatives for those who desire straight hair without resorting to a relaxer.
 
I never say never, but I highly doubt it. I'd become heat trained before turning to chemicals.


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
 
transitioning,but nope, never. I want the superlong hair I have seen on relatives and 99% of them were natural.
 
Rocky91 said:
1) I'd have to re-learn the ins and outs of my hair. Doesn't sound fun.
2) My flat-iron skills are da bomb.com so when I want straight hair... i just plug in my flatiron.
3) $$$$$$$$$ I'd want to go to the salon for a professional relaxer, and just who would be paying for that ish? Not I, says the broke college student. :nono:
Click to expand...
All the above, except for number 3. I have 2 kids and would prefer to spend money on them doing a fun activity vs me paying someone else to do my hair.
 
no.jpg
 
It isn't something that I'm considering right now, but I don't have any strong feelings one way or the other about using a relaxer again. If I woke up one day and felt that's what I wanted to do, I'd do it.
 
I can't say for the rest of my life, but I am too in love with my hair right now to straighten it permanently.

If the market comes up with a super cool and healthy way to allow me to wear my hair straight through rain or snow and hectic work weeks, and then have my curls back for the weekend, yeah maybe.
 
I ain't gonna lie! Over the weekend I had an ugly hair moment...but I quickly chalked it up to, "I'll always have those: suck it up and deal with it!" Prior to becming natural I wore wigs and buns religiously. To be honest I intially decided to become natural after I could not style my hair because I was working out so much. LOL, the workouts faded, and I am still overweight...but I now have natural hair. I put too much money and time into products, so this is a way of life now. Natural...and I like it.
 
Since I've never been able to have long, healthy, relaxed hair at the same time, I'm gonna have to say not bloody likely. Even with all the info on this board, I'm not trying to tempt fate only to have to start all over again because I mucked up.
 
RachelRegina said:
Nope. I got dandruff from those relaxers...salon or store, cheap or expensive.

.
Click to expand...

So did I!!! I washed my hair weekly, but I had the worse dandruff when I was relaxed. Now that I'm natural, I can go a few weeks without washing if I wanted to without any dandruff.
 
RachelRegina said:
Nope. I got dandruff from those relaxers...salon or store, cheap or expensive.
Click to expand...

~~HoneyComb~~ said:
So did I!!! I washed my hair weekly, but I had the worse dandruff when I was relaxed. Now that I'm natural, I can go a few weeks without washing if I wanted to without any dandruff.
Click to expand...

RachelRegina said:
@ the bold: Ditto. :nono:

Girl since i've been natural i haven't had any dandruff AT ALL. :yep:
Click to expand...

Same here. I had THE WORST dry scalp and dandruff problem when I was relaxed.

Glad that's over. :yep:
 
Great question OP! :up:

Honestly, for me.... It's not even really all that deep. I figure, if you want to relax, RELAX. If you want to stay natural...STAY NATURAL! It's no big deal. Your hair will always grow out again and again. I bc'd in October 2010, and I've only been FULLY natural for about 4.5 months.

But for ME personally, right now on March 7, 2011, I CANNOT see myself going back to a relaxer anytime soon. :nono2: I'm not going to say "never" (because I can't predict the future), but for right NOW....I just don't see it. :nono: Why not? You may ask?

REASONS:

1-I'm sorry, but it took me WAY TOO long and way TOO much hard work to transition out of a relaxer. :nono2: If I ever relaxed again and wanted to "transition" back to natural, I would have to start that process alllll over again...and right now I just don't think I have the strength. :giggle:

2-I'm just having WAAAAY too much fun with my natural hair! :woot: :yay: :yay:

3-In all honesty...I don't really "MISS" getting relaxers. :look: :look:

4-There's just no greater feeling than feeling your own natural hair texture and realizing that this hair that is growing out of your head is ALL yours and ALL natural. NO chemicals have been added to alter your texture, nothing has touched your hair.. It is just PURE virgin hair. I have a sense of PRIDE in my hair now (somethingthat I didn't have while I was relaxing my hair every 3 or 4 months). *sigh* It's such a great feeling. :love2:

5-My hair is growing like a weed now! lol :grin:

6-I'm learning SOO much about my own hair texture and type. It's actually FUN doing my hair now and figuring out which styles/products/techniques I'm going to do on my hair today. :yep:

7-I feel so much more confident now with my natural hair. Sure, I have some bad hair days every now and then, but I used to have bad hair days with relaxed hair too! So...really, it's a catch-22. I can have a bad hair day with natural, stronger, thicker hair. OR, I can have a bad hair day with thinning, breaking, weak hair strands. :ohwell: I'll take the former.

8-My poor hair line edges are FINALLY growing back in! :yay:

9-I don't have anymore dandruff, and my scalp doesn't feel sore or tender anymore. :yep: :up: I know that if I EVER have any balding or an "issue" with my scalp again, it WON'T be because of a chemical in my hair. :nono: I can't count how many times I used to think that my hair breakage was just simply "stress", sleeping on the wrong side of my bed, and genetics. :nono: ANYTHING but the actual relaxer chemical that I was putting on my scalp every few months for over 20 years. :ohwell: But now I know better. :yep:

10-I know that if I ever get the "itch" to wear my hair straight, I can always flat iron it, weave it up, stretch it via braiding/twisting/banding methods, or blow dry it. I don't HAVE to put a harsh chemical in my hair ever few months just to wear my hair straight in other words. To me, it's the best of both worlds. :yep:
 
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